[ rss / options / help ]
post ]
[ b / iq / g / zoo ] [ e / news / lab ] [ v / nom / pol / eco / emo / 101 / shed ]
[ art / A / beat / boo / com / fat / job / lit / map / mph / poof / £$€¥ / spo / uhu / uni / x / y ] [ * | sfw | o ]
logo
problems

Return ] Entire Thread ] First 100 posts ] Last 50 posts ]

Posting mode: Reply [Last 50 posts]
Reply ]
Subject   (reply to 23560)
Message
File  []
close
ennui.jpg
235602356023560
>> No. 23560 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 6:49 pm
23560 Minor angst and existential dread, Mk. I
We tend to have a lot of repeated threads here, but I also get the feeling people don't tend to post in /emo/ unless it's a big issue.

With this in mind I suggest that we have a thread for stuff that's got you down a bit and you need to get off your chest, without it being major enough to make an entire thread devoted to it. We can also use it as a go-to for minor relationship advice, work problems, social drama, and things like that.

Everyone gets down from time to time, let's put some Sisters of Mercy on and wallow together for a while.
1177 posts omitted. Last 50 posts shown. Expand all images.
>> No. 28907 Anonymous
5th September 2019
Thursday 8:47 am
28907 spacer
>>28901
>no safety net

You're irresponsible and you come across as a cunt. You do know where you're posting, right?
>> No. 28908 Anonymous
5th September 2019
Thursday 11:03 am
28908 spacer
>You basically called Jeremy Kyle a hippie.

Well the fact that you are saying the same advice as him might be the first clue it isn't real constructive advice and just a tool for provocation and berration.

>>28907

I'm posting in the wallowing thread. I'm sorry that I turn my nose up at advice that gets all the up votes over at r/relationship. But I'm not going to start eating myself when it is still perfectly reasonable for me to find a job that I can get by on. I just needed a teary because the stress was getting to me.
>> No. 28909 Anonymous
5th September 2019
Thursday 11:30 am
28909 spacer
>>28906
>Minimum wage is, just about, enough to get by.

Not to push /emo/ into politics, but this is just factually untrue: https://www.livingwage.org.uk/what-real-living-wage
>> No. 28910 Anonymous
7th September 2019
Saturday 2:06 am
28910 spacer
Finally in from a night out. It was a good friend's birthday so I was semi-obliged to go.

I fucking hate clubs. I have had girlfriends, I've had attention, but something about clubs makes me feel pathetically lonely and sad, everybody there either trying to avoid the people desperate to hook up or people desperate to find somebody to hook up with the make the night worth it.

I always feel a bit grim after it and strangely lonely.

There's a club if you'd like to go
You could meet somebody who really loves you
So you go and you stand on your own
And you leave on your own
And you go home and you cry
And you want to die

>> No. 28931 Anonymous
11th September 2019
Wednesday 7:34 am
28931 spacer
Burying my best mate today and I managed to travel halfway across the country only to forget my proper trousers. A shit day just got worse.
>> No. 28932 Anonymous
11th September 2019
Wednesday 2:36 pm
28932 spacer
>>28931
Would he care about your improper trousers anyway?
>> No. 28933 Anonymous
11th September 2019
Wednesday 3:44 pm
28933 spacer
>>28932
Probably not but then again he was a devout atheist and the service took place in a church. Bought some suitable kecks from a local charity shop for a bargain. Crisis averted.
>> No. 28934 Anonymous
11th September 2019
Wednesday 4:59 pm
28934 spacer
>>28933
They sound like top kecks.
>> No. 28935 Anonymous
11th September 2019
Wednesday 5:47 pm
28935 spacer
I'm not sure if it's just a bad day every other day or if I should really just hand my notice in and get out of my current job before I lose it.

The role isn't a fit for me and I'm not interested in the work but hey, that's any job right? I'm at a crossroads now whether I go through with it and get a clean slate. Both in mind and employment opportunities or convince myself it's another one off and just grit my teeth with it.

The way I've worded this makes it seem I really don't want this job anymore but I fear I'll pussy out again.
>> No. 28936 Anonymous
11th September 2019
Wednesday 6:15 pm
28936 spacer
>>28935
Find a new job before you quit this one. It not only means you won't be caught out but it helps you if you can say to your future employer that you are applying because you want bigger and better things.
>> No. 28937 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 6:19 am
28937 spacer
>>28936
My problem is my current job is 9-5 Monday-Friday and I need to give a months notice.
Meaning it's a nightmare to schedule an interview within "office hours" and I'm fairly certain any potential employer will be put off when I have to give a month's notice as opposed to someone who can start the next day.
>> No. 28938 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 7:02 am
28938 spacer
>>28937

Most employers understand this and will schedule around your current job. Four weeks notice isn't all that unusual.
>> No. 28939 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 8:34 am
28939 spacer
Alright. One more day of sitting about tossing it off reading wiki pages and then tomorrow is going to be the day you start sorting your life out. Do the dishes, put some washing on, good grief man.

I'm barely fucking clinging to existence frankly. Has anyone ever managed to off themselves by simply ceasing to be arsed going about the rituals of life? I almost went to work this morning because it's easier than facing the moral ambiguity of a day off.
>> No. 28940 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 11:03 pm
28940 spacer
>>28939
Ye, don't try and do everything. Put a wash on, or do some dishes. Small bit at a time is the way to start.
>> No. 28941 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 2:45 pm
28941 spacer
Knowing you're going through a mental break/heading for a breakdown but just sitting there and letting it come is a wild fucking ride.
>> No. 28942 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 9:59 pm
28942 spacer
>>28941
feels
i've been having auditory hallucinations and my memory and concentration have gone to shit i feel like a different person

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 28943 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 11:02 pm
28943 spacer
That manner of posting is rightly unnacceptable, but you modsods better not have given him one of your piss-takingly long bans, by which I mean anything over an hour.
>> No. 28944 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 11:25 pm
28944 spacer
>>28943
/shed/ m8.
>> No. 28945 Anonymous
14th September 2019
Saturday 10:08 am
28945 spacer
I wake up every morning as me. I wouldn't wish this fate on anyone.

I'm not religious but I sort of feel like I should be. Maybe this is one of those psychological hells rather than the fire and brimstone type.
>> No. 28946 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 1:03 am
28946 spacer
Whenever I consider suicide I think that if I've reached a point where it seems like a viable option, I may as well just live as if I'm already dead, and suddenly I feel a sense of peace and freedom.
>> No. 28947 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 1:23 am
28947 spacer
>>28945
>>28946
So do something to redeem yourself.
>> No. 28948 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 1:47 am
28948 spacer
>>28947
> redeem yourself

Nice egoic delusions my man
>> No. 28950 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 8:20 am
28950 spacer
>>28948
You could say that to anyone using the word "I" but you chose to bring it up in response to that? Unless you think either poster can depress themselves to Buddhist enlightenment it seems unhelpful.
>> No. 28951 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 12:28 pm
28951 spacer
>>28947
>>28946 and I are not the same, so he may take what you said differently.

>Redeem yourself
But what can I do? Any efforts at self improvement may work in the short term but I usually end up worse than I started. Even so, nothing really changes when I do.
>> No. 28952 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 1:36 pm
28952 spacer
>>28951

Find something you can do that benefits others and needs regular doing.
>> No. 28953 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 8:48 pm
28953 spacer
I don't want to top myself, but I honestly dread waking up everyday. Why can I just die peacefully in my sleep?
>> No. 28954 Anonymous
15th September 2019
Sunday 11:52 pm
28954 spacer
>>28953
What's putting the willies up you come morning?
>> No. 28955 Anonymous
16th September 2019
Monday 1:13 am
28955 spacer
>>28954
The fact of living for another day. I try my best and put mu affairs in order hoping that I die in my sleep. I have been doing this for three years now. It is draining.
>> No. 28956 Anonymous
17th September 2019
Tuesday 10:51 am
28956 spacer
Why does it seem to be getting harder, lads? I've been alone my whole life but this past month all I've felt is that I'm in desperate need of a hug and someone to tell me things are ok.
>> No. 28957 Anonymous
17th September 2019
Tuesday 2:51 pm
28957 spacer
>>28956
Things are OK, lad. We’re all gonna make it.
>> No. 28959 Anonymous
20th September 2019
Friday 7:05 pm
28959 spacer
I've been out of work for almost four months now. Things are getting desperate, and I really don't want to be forced into taking a shit job for below market rate for the third time in a row, since the shittiness of the job has been a major contributing factor to the previous two not working out, and three of those in a row on the CV is effectively career over. At this rate, if I can get a bung from BoMaD, I'll completely run out of money at the end of next month, with everything maxed out. The most pernicious part of all this is that background screening questionnaires in my line of work now routinely ask whether you've asked creditors for help, so going down that route is worse than bombing out of another shit job. Any attempt to get out of a shit job after a couple of months by getting a better one is invariably going to looked upon with suspicion by anyone I apply to, who will see two short jobs, followed by another one I'm only a couple of months into, and evidently my tolerance for shit jobs isn't up to sticking at it.
>> No. 28969 Anonymous
22nd September 2019
Sunday 1:53 pm
28969 spacer
I genuinely can't remember the last time I was happy.
>> No. 28970 Anonymous
25th September 2019
Wednesday 9:45 am
28970 spacer
Can anyone recommend cheap therapy options? Gone my whole life without but I'm falling apart so bad even I think I'm in trouble, the problem is I'm pretty broke.
>> No. 28971 Anonymous
25th September 2019
Wednesday 10:12 am
28971 spacer
>>28970
Why would you need money? Go see your GP, if you’re expressing that you can’t cope they’ll at least make themselves available to chat to you when you’re in crisis and they’ll refer you to community psych services as well as hospital psych services.

There are also several charities that run a free call number who have someone on the other end to talk to, like the Samaritans. Money isn’t an object.

>broke
On reflection, are you a Seppo? I don’t mean to be insensitive, but what possible insight do you reckon we could have on the American health care system?
>> No. 28972 Anonymous
25th September 2019
Wednesday 10:47 am
28972 spacer
>>28971
> On reflection, are you a Seppo? I don’t mean to be insensitive, but what possible insight do you reckon we could have on the American health care system?
U fucking wot m8, he just means he's skint.
>> No. 28973 Anonymous
25th September 2019
Wednesday 11:22 am
28973 spacer
>>28970

NHS talking therapy for depression and anxiety is offered through a service called IAPT (Improving Access to Psychotherapy). You can usually refer yourself directly to this service, although it's probably worth making an appointment with your GP as well to talk to them about other treatment options.

Waiting times for IAPT varies from a couple of weeks to several months depending on your local area and the level of treatment you need. They offer a range of services, from guided self-help and group therapy through to individual face-to-face therapy. You'll usually be offered no more than six half-hour sessions.

https://www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/Psychological%20therapies%20(IAPT)/LocationSearch/10008

If you choose to go private, many counsellors and therapists offer concessionary rates to people on a low income. You can find a list of accredited local counsellors and therapists at the link below. It might also be worth looking for local charities that offer help; for this, you can call the MIND Infoline on 0300 123 3393.

https://www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/

If you need to talk to someone right away, you can call The Samaritans at any time on 116 123. They're not a therapy service, but they offer non-judgemental listening if there's something you need to get off your chest.

https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/

If you feel like you're in crisis and you're worried that you might harm yourself or someone else, call 999 and ask for an ambulance.
>> No. 28974 Anonymous
25th September 2019
Wednesday 3:01 pm
28974 spacer
>>28972
Being “broke” and looking for cheap healthcare rather than good healthcare is peak Seppo, and a bit beyond our remit.
>> No. 28975 Anonymous
25th September 2019
Wednesday 3:50 pm
28975 spacer
>>28974

There is very limited availability of psychotherapy on the NHS, with long waiting times, short treatment durations and a lack of choice over the therapist and therapy type. If you can possibly afford it, going private is a vastly better option; unfortunately, a lot of people find it difficult to afford the ~£50/hr that most psychotherapists charge.
>> No. 28976 Anonymous
26th September 2019
Thursday 10:02 am
28976 spacer
>>28971
My lifestyle isn't settled, I move around a lot and I'm often out of the country and as the other lad has said, the waiting lists for appointments are just ridiculous, by the time I get one I'm off elsewhere again.

>>28973
Cheers for the links, I've had a friend recommend a few options so I think I'm going to try out the cheapest I can, see how it goes.

Thanks lads. Thlads.
>> No. 28977 Anonymous
26th September 2019
Thursday 11:00 pm
28977 spacer

1563777263545.jpg
289772897728977
>>28975
>a lot of people find it difficult to afford the ~£50/hr that most psychotherapists charge.

You'd have thought the pricing would reflect the level of insight achieved on a given day, rather than a flat rate. It could take a number of sessions to gain the rapport necessary to start working into your repressions. Paying £50 an hour to initially chat seems pretty steep.
How is it that such disciplines are this vaulable? Is it simply because qualified professionals are scarce?
>> No. 28978 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 12:51 am
28978 spacer

psychology merchant.jpg
289782897828978
>>28977

I think a large part of the psychology profession exists because of rich people who like to talk about themselves candidly for an hour with someone legally bound to confidentiality.
>> No. 28979 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 2:16 am
28979 spacer
>>28977

>How is it that such disciplines are this valuable? Is it simply because qualified professionals are scarce?

Psychotherapists aren't that expensive in the scheme of things. A plumber, electrician or locksmith would charge you a similar hourly rate. You'll pay at least £150 for a short consultation with a private doctor or a solicitor.

If you're working freelance, your hourly rate needs to cover your overheads and all the work you aren't actually billing for - office space, taxes, insurance, admin, continuing training etc. A freelancer's hourly rate can look scandalous compared to an employee, but you're paying a freelancer for much more than just that hour of their time.
>> No. 28980 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 11:08 am
28980 spacer
>>28979

>A plumber, electrician or locksmith would charge you a similar hourly rate

Sure, but you're not typically expected to have a locksmith out to you once a week.
>> No. 28981 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 12:43 pm
28981 spacer
>>28980
Not him but there is a big focus in psychotherapy towards fixing your problems forever by giving you the tools to deal with them yourself. It's more akin to paying for a locksmith to come around and teach you how to fix all your locks.

There is also a big divide in the kind of treatment you might receive with odds of success dependant on what you pay.
>> No. 28982 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 1:33 pm
28982 spacer
>>28981

Yep. The evidence shows that CBT has maximum benefit after 12 to 20 sessions, with a fairly rapid tailing off after that. There's really no evidence to support staying in therapy for longer than that, although occasional top-up sessions once or twice a year can be useful. The NHS usually offers no more than six half-hour sessions, which is a bit like taking a quarter of a paracetamol for a headache - it'll help a bit, but it's nowhere near the right dose.

Paying somewhere between £600 and £1000 to significantly improve your mental health is pretty good value as things go; the problem is that the people who most need it are usually least able to afford it.
>> No. 28983 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 3:01 pm
28983 spacer
>>28982
Having a spare grand would solve all my mental health problems anyway. Oh, the irony.
>> No. 28984 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 9:26 pm
28984 spacer
Studies have shown that self-directed CBT is just as effective as going to an actual therapist, as long as you're not too depressed to do CBT exercises consisently over the long term. I think the main benefit of seeing an actual therapist is that they make sure you're putting in the work.
>> No. 28985 Anonymous
28th September 2019
Saturday 4:44 am
28985 spacer
I did maybe ~16 weeks of CBT for extremely bad panic attacks back in '13. I was paying £50 for an hour a week back then but to be honest I was at my wit's end and would have done anything to have got myself out of the hole that I was in.

Eventually a careful balancing act of CBT and medication got me back onto my feet and back into being a functioning member of society. Actual jaw-bursting, teeth clenching, gut-scrunching, "I'm really finally going to die" panic attacks are down to one every month or so as opposed to the daily occurrence they were in the 2012/13 season.

I'm not really sure what I wanted to put across with all this but just relating my experience, nonetheless.

Sage for rambling.
>> No. 28999 Anonymous
5th October 2019
Saturday 12:39 pm
28999 spacer

7051204-pumpkin-seed-in-the-ground.jpg
289992899928999

>> No. 29004 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 12:59 am
29004 spacer
Wish I'd done parties and had a girlfriend.

Return ] Entire Thread ] First 100 posts ] Last 50 posts ]
whiteline

Delete Post []
Password