>>430458
I always assumed that I looked more like my mum and my brother looked more like my dad, which was quite commonly agreed upon by my immediate family. That was until my estranged cousin on my mother's side got in touch and she looks like my brother in a wig. I'm fairly certain my dad hasn't fucked his sister-in-law.

>>430475

I know that I came from my dad because although he died young, the older I get, the more I look like him. My mun keeps telling me I've even got a lot of his mannerisms, which I couldn't really have picked up from him when he was still alive. All of his old suits also fit me perfectly. Another indication is that an oil painting exists of my great-great-great-(?)granddad, and it, too, bears an undeniable resemblance to the way I look now in adulthood.

I look strikingly unlike anybody in my mum's family though. They were all pudgy looking peasants with puffy cheeks, while I inherited my dad's tall and slim frame and his oval face with the high cheekbones. So the question would actually be if I came from my mum, but there are about a dozen photographs from my birth that prove it.

This is some CKII Zoroastrian shit ITT.

>>430408
Fair enough. I'm not even sure if I would want to meet the guy by this point.


>>430440
>>430418
Well, this has been a whole thing. My parents never explicitly told me I was the child of a donor, but I figured it out eventually. I am a bit of a spergic cunt with no idea how to act normally, and it was somewhat exaggerated during my teen years; it really shit my dad up that I went ahead and requested the info without consulting him, but I felt like it was my right to know. Family has never been even remotely important to me, but I feel it could be catastrophic in families with a strong bond.

>>430451
As I said yesterday, you don't have to look that similar to look similar enough.



Genetics is a complex thing, though. I don't really think I look like anyone on my mum's side, but my grandfather died in 1985, and both my grandmother and grandfather's individual parents (I'm not sure how to word this without it sounding like they shared parents; they did not) died when they were young, so there are few, if any pictures of any of my direct male lineage.

>>430490

>I am a bit of a spergic cunt with no idea how to act normally


With future designer babies, that shouldn't happen anymore.

>>430493
Thank fuck. The world doesn't need any more wastes of resources like me.

>>430494

That's the spirit.

If I let go of my anger I'd probably dissipate into a foul smelling viscous liquid, but holding onto it I'm like a fucked washing machine, all smashed to shite by its own motive force.

It's darker this morning than it was last night.

Do I see lots of Wensleydale cheese in the shops because it's popular or because I live in Yorkshire? If I went west would I instead see Cheshire cheese and I if went to Wales would it be Caerphilly cheese?

>>432102
Is there any cheese that comes from the South?

>>432103
Cheddar. If shops around here only stock three cheeses then it tends to be Cheddar, Wensleydale and Red Leicester.

Am I meant to capitalise my cheeses?

>>432102

Wensleydale is always available in shops here up north, though usually only one type. I see Red Leicester just as much. I don't think there is a North East cheese though so maybe that's why.

>>432106
CHEESE.

>>432107

>>432106

I really enjoy Red Leicester, I think of it as much better than, say, Cheddar on a sandwich.

>>432129
I'd say it depends on the quality of the cheese. I'd take ordinary Cheddar over ordinary Red Leicester, but I'd opt for the latter if it's aged.

Just heard from an old friend that one of my exes is expecting. And she's now got her wedding planned for next spring, apparently.

I feel funny about this news in a way that I shouldn't. Especially because I could never see myself marrying her and having kids with her anyway.

My brother has asked what I want from duty free, as he's buggering off to the east for a week. On an airplane, you see. I want to ask for a nice aftershave, but I'm terribly out of touch with all that. I'm afraid whatever I ask for will make me sound like a twat, and smell like a 15 year old trying to get his end away.

>>432263
>I'm terribly out of touch with all that. I'm afraid whatever I ask for will make me sound like a twat, and smell like a 15 year old trying to get his end away.

What often gets overlooked is that a lot of women actually like the smell of things like Lynx. If it smells nice it smells nice.

I use Joop Go, purely because you can get it cheaply.

https://www.fragrancedirect.co.uk/joop-go-eau-de-toilette-spray-100ml-0009287.html

>>432263
Tell him to pick up a bottle of carbon sequestration to balance out the emissions of the flight.

>>432265
He's already offset his own footprint from the flight by getting his kids to cycle up the shop for him.

>>432264

I'm nearly 40 and I still don't know why using Lynx is supposed to be a bad thing or what I'm actually supposed to put under my arms instead. I'm currently using some Nivea For Men gubbins even though my mum always told me that antiperspirants were bad for you because I want to avoid the "Lynx Stigma".

>>432265

Not sure it'll make much of a difference.

>>432274

Lynx is what teenage boys cover themselves in, so it's associated with immaturity, being overused, and probably also just covering up the fact you couldn't be arsed to shower. Lynx actually smells fine though, obviously. Though I'm not sure I could get a whiff of Africa without being reminded of the changing rooms at middle school.

I have an Olbas inhaler. Life is good again.

>>432274

Separate to what >>432277 says,
>my mum always told me that antiperspirants were bad for you
https://www.webmd.com/breast-cancer/features/antiperspirant-facts-safety#1

>>432279

I think there's a reasonable compromise to be made in using roll ons or sticks instead of aerosols. There's no evidence that the aluminium compounds in antiperspirants can be absorbed through the skin, but why would you want to inhale any of it at all when a perfectly good alternative exists.
Probably a little better for the environment than aerosols too.

Is it just me or does girlfriend/boyfriend have stronger meaning than it used to? I feel like back in my day it merely denoted exclusively dating but I get the impression it is something much more long-term today. Maybe it's not the world that's changed but I've just gotten older.

I feel sorry for the alien archaeologists who are going to sift through our ruins one day and try to make sense of all this.

>>432303
There seems to be an increase in the number of people in long-term relationships who have no interest in getting married, anecdotally at least.

>>432304

On the other hand, I seem to notice a trend of people getting married in a quite small cermony without a wedding party. A couple I know got married in a tiny chapel by the sea, and only their close relatives and best friends were present for it. That was their whole wedding. And inspired by this, another couple I know are thinking about doing the same kind of thing for their wedding.

>>432309
There can be a lot of politics when it comes to weddings. I've known someone get ghosted by one of their closest friends for several years all because she didn't want children at her wedding.

>>432310

>I've known someone get ghosted by one of their closest friends for several years all because she didn't want children at her wedding.

To be honest, I don't think parents do themselves, or their children a favour by taking their sprogs to the wedding with them. When I think back to the weddings that I was made to go to when I was a weelad, I think it was for the most part fucking boring for the six- or eight-year-old me. Even if there were other kids to play with. And the weddings I've gone to in recent years, most kids there seemed to not really enjoy the whole affair either.

I can see how it's going to rub many people the wrong way if you tell them that they can come to the wedding but they can't bring their kids. But it's really not such a cunt move as it seems at first glance. Some thinking will have gone into it.

>>432311

Not sure I understand the mentality of the guests. I mean, by definition, as a guest you let the hosts have things their way. Especially if the event is their wedding day.

>>432311
At the last wedding I went to there were small children talking and whining during the ceremony itself and the speeches before the meal.

I'm not saying they should be banned, but most events would objectively be better off without them.

>>432313

Also, when parents get together with other parents, it's a pissing match on a good day. Especially with their kids in tow. Attending a function without their lifestyle accessories children and thus being less able to brag about them would do some parents some good.

>>432311
I'm a full grown adult and weddings bore the piss out of me. Have a party if you want to waste money celebrating your relationship, don't make me wear a suit and sit through hours of tedious rituals.

I'm not saying they should be banned, but most marriages would objectively be better off without them.

Is it just me or are KP peanuts soft? I've been eating spicy peanuts from the asian supermarket for a while and just bought some KP assuming they'd be the same without the spice but they're not. They have no bite to them.

>>432319

I've had good fun the last two or three weddings respectively, each time targeting one of the bride's perennially single friends who was feeling down that night because her friend was getting married and she was single with no hope of it changing in the near future.

Contrary to belief, they aren't always complete munters. One of them was really proper fit and we had a snog. Things went a little south when we then met a few days later and we realised we had next to nothing in common. But hey, as far as pity snogs, I could have done far worse that night.

It will soon be a year since I've had a fizzy drink.

>>432350
Champagne or sparkling mineral water can be very nice for the digestion. The hell with Coca-cola etc though.

>>432351
I dunno, nothing beats fat-coke when I have a hangover or a dodgy tummy.

>>432350
I was about to post about this separately, but would like to join in with your celebrations if that's okay.

It will be two years in January since I've had an alcoholic one. Whilst I do feel better health-wise, and I make a prat of myself far less, I do get bored a lot more though. Particularly around these times of festivity when all friends, family and colleagues are out getting arse-faced.

I wouldn't trade (almost) two years of sobriety for one night of debauchery, but I just want it out there that the temptation arises occasionally.

>>432303

I'm not sure, but I've noticed it too. A while back I met a lass who I really liked, so I said (in a somewhat less cringe-worthy way) that we should be girlfriend and boyfriend. What I meant was "let's be exclusive to each other", what she thought I meant was "start making plans for our wedding, looking for houses for us to buy, and making plans for me to be a stay at home dad so you can continue your career where you earn literally one tenth of what I do".

Maybe it was because she was a fair bit younger, maybe it was because she was mental.

>>432395

I don't think I've ever asked a woman outright "Will you be my girlfriend". I've always hated that wording, so the times when it came to establishing just what exactly me and a lass were, my workaround would always be something like, "I guess that means we're together now", or "I wouldn't mind if we got a little deeper involved". That sort of thing. Maybe I'm just not romantic, but "Will you be my girlfriend" has always made me cringe.

>>432400
> Maybe I'm just not romantic, but "Will you be my girlfriend" has always made me cringe.

Quite. As I said, I didn't use those exact words but the general thrust of what I said was along the lines of we should no longer just be two people who shag but should be somewhat officially a couple, which is to say I might call her my girlfriend and vice versa.

Anyway, her interpretation of the whole thing was quite different to mine, which would have been fine in a romantic comedy but was fucking miserable in real life.

I've always maintained that the British don't really date, we just get sambuccad up to the point where it's obvious that we both want it (otherwise, why on else would we still both be there drinking however many hours later?).

>>432403
>why on else would we still both be there drinking however many hours later?)
Alcoholism?

>>432395

If she was a millennial or younger, I think it's sort of come to mean that by neccessity. I think me and my mates were of the last generation who lived the dream of moving out in our late teens/early 20s and spending a few years getting up to sitcom drunken mates antics; and even then we were late to the party and it cost us more than it should have. I feel as though the younger generation coming up today are consciously aware from the word go that in order to comfortably fly the nest, or gain any sort of real foothold in life, you've got to have found someone to split the bill with already.

Slowly but surely I think we'll end up like Japan, with young people who can't functionally court one another at all. Online dating is the first step towards it, for those of us who still have some sense of social liberty it's fine but you do notice a lot of people treat it like a job application. Give it another ten or twenty years and they'll be marrying the first person they move in with for the sake of ease and just not taking to each other until retirement.

>>432411
> If she was a millennial or younger

I've really lost track of what all these generations actually mean but she was born mid 90s so I'd say end of the millennials / first of the gen-z's border, I guess.

> I think me and my mates were of the last generation who lived the dream of moving out in our late teens/early 20s and spending a few years getting up to sitcom drunken mates antics; and even then we were late to the party and it cost us more than it should have.

Likewise. When I was 21 I could land a 4x minimum wage job and fuck off the hell far away from home, split a stupidly (relatively for the time, the same place would cost maybe three or four times that today) expensive flat with some mates and basically live a 24/7 party during my early twenties.

(Obviously none of this was particularly intelligent, if I'd taken the stupid amount of rent I was paying and even half the money I spent on alcohol and retarded clubs every week and thrown it in a savings account..... but then I wouldn't have the stories, right?).

> consciously aware from the word go that in order to comfortably fly the nest, or gain any sort of real foothold in life, you've got to have found someone to split the bill with already.

I feel you could be right about that. She was always on about how she wasn't going to leave home until she got married, and harping on about how she felt she hadn't achieved anything because everyone she went to school with had either got married or had a kid (as if being a single parent is somehow desirable). Maybe I was just the mad bint's meal ticket.

Sigh and sage. It's too early to think about this kind of thing. I need a drink.

>>432411

>but you do notice a lot of people treat it like a job application

Sadly, I think we're now seeing this as a standard. Because just like an HR person at a company, you get to choose between about two or three dozen, well, applicants, and you are only going to have a limited time to concern yourself with each one of them. And being spoiled for choice that way IMO also means that you are less willing to let something run its course and get to know the person better while not being put off by annoying quirks they may have and that are apparent from the beginning. Why invest all that time, when you can just as easily move on to the next person. But I maintain that it's merely an illusion of choice, and that it gets you no further in finding the right person for you than in the old days.

I remember a time when online dating consisted of putting an ad on some local events web site in your area, and then you would wait impatiently for three or four people to e-mail you. And the odds were against you in the first place if you were a lad writing to a lass with a very attractive photo of herself. Even that was kind of radical in the late 90s to early 2000s, because growing up, when I was a weelad, putting an ad in an actual paper looking for a partner always had kind of a connotation of desperation attached to it. You had exhausted all the ways of finding a partner within your social circles, or you were just too ugly or too messed up in the first place to find somebody among them, so that was your last straw. Kind of funny how that has changed. But like I said, it needs to be taken with a grain of salt, and finding Mr. or Ms. Right to me seems no easier than back then. Just the parameters of it have changed.