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|>>|| No. 429895
Any of you lads find British suburbia deathly boring?
Life can't all be action film stunts and fast-paced living, but the thought of returning to my suburban hometown from London fills me with dread. Even when I go back to visit family for a week or so I get bored almost instantly.
Nothing ever changes, small town mentality takes over, what the neighbour bought for their new car becomes the topic of conversation and there's not much to do. I don't mean in the sense that 'there's no vegan cafe that makes food out of recycled compost' things to do, I mean there's literally nothing to do really that I haven't done a million times before. People at home mock how their mortgage on a three bed semi is less than my monthly rent but what they don't understand is that's because nobody wants to live there. I know that I'm being as annoying by sneering at them.
I know I'll have to relent and move back one day as I can't afford to live in London forever but I don't know how to get past this mental block. I could move abroad, but I guess their suburbias are the same too.
Any of you lads in a similar boat? What are your plans? How did you get over it? Or more practically, how do I sneer at the idea less?
Pic related: The kind of place I imagine when I say this.
|>>|| No. 430123
>it makes sense that you might want sex and consent and everything to be a much more businesslike, black and white affair.
That's not what a BDSM relationship looks like unless you're actually paying for it.
|>>|| No. 430125
In the BDSM community, it's not weird to just ask someone "would you like to have sex" without any particular courtship, nor is it weird to go through a checklist of likes and dislikes beforehand. The combination of sexual openness and a very careful attitude to consent makes things far easier to navigate for the less socially adept.
|>>|| No. 430138
Example: Lasses who reckon it's akin to rape if you look at their tits or whatever ridiculous shit. You know what I meant lad.
I wasn't actually talking about BDSM, but yeah, it does have a lot of those types, and you are right.
The lad who says if you want a kinky relationship you have to look for nerdy gothy types is spot on. Your other best bet are those council estate working class lasses who didn't want to be chavs when they were a teenager so they listened to My Chemical Romance and Greenday instead. Those ones are more often the deeply submissive no-limits type; your educated goth nerd is more likely to want to peg you but will also have a careful list of things that are off the table.
Those are the only types of girlfriend I've ever had.
|>>|| No. 430140
You are operating at the completely different end of the social ladder from anyone I've ever met in the scene I've found the most into it are the ones who are aggressively socialites they have to be driven at everything including how they sex.
It is actually a big part of what puts me off the scene. I could hate fuck them but I don't think I could talk about anything they care about for more than a few minutes before I hit my limit of tolerance for them.
|>>|| No. 430141
That's because "the scene" is for wankers, and I think 90% of people who are into fetish stuff find that out pretty quickly. If not, then they're probably one of the 10% who are wankers.
The rest of it is far more easily explored online nowadays. Maybe in the old days fetish clubs and events had more of a purpose beyond letting millennials for whom tattoos and facial piercings weren't enough express themselves; but nowadays, unless your fetish is specifically linked to polygamy or voyeurism, you're much better served just hooking up with someone off a website, or just getting daring with a dating app.
The way I see it, the fetish scene is basically just the "alternative" answer to the more traditional British seediness of dogging and swinging.
|>>|| No. 430142
>Lasses who reckon it's akin to rape if you look at their tits
No, no-one thinks this.
|>>|| No. 430145
They very definitely do though. They might only be fringe online mentalists and student union twats, but they absolutely do exist.
|>>|| No. 430146
Again, no they don't, and you've provided no proof that they do exist.
I'm not calling you a liar, because of course maybe you did genuinely see someone say exactly those words once, but that would be like me hearing someone say they think their parents have been replaced with robot duplicates, and then going on .gs to talk about how ridiculous I find the extremist Parental Robot Imposter Movement.
|>>|| No. 430147
Different poster here
I've literally met those sorts. There are definitely people who grow up sheltered learning male sexuality is disgusting and men are only after one thing and they start trying to apply this model to the world as young adults. It takes them a while to learn what normal humans actually are like. And that not all men are looking at their tits, and even if some men do it is okay and healthy that someone finds them sexy.
I mean we all have to learn from experience and make mistakes I just wish they hadn't been preprogrammed to hate men by their parents.
|>>|| No. 430149
I'm not going to bother to be honest lad. You only have to go read a site like Jezebel.
There are seven billion people on this planet, and lots of them are nutters. There are literally people out there who believe the earth is flat. There are people who believe the Queen is a fucking alien lizard. There are people who believe looking at a bird's tits is declining salmon populations in action.
I'm sorry if it offends your sensibilities to admit some fisherpersons are mentalists, but some of them are.
|>>|| No. 430181
>the degree of social control that exists there. And all the gossipping. And people's window curtains twitching when you've got a new car in your driveway or a new wife.
I live somewhere that's identical to your description. I caused chaos last year after I let a friend store a classic car on my yard. The locals first reported me to council for running a business from home then collectively wrote a letter asking me to think of the areas image. All in all great fun and cheated me up.
Tldr - fuck them
|>>|| No. 430193
>Any of you lads find British suburbia deathly boring?
I mean of course it is, not always it entirely depends on your situation, your wants and needs and your disposition.
The question I'd be interested to hear your lads opinions on is if you think it's really a "British" thing at all?
I mean I'm sure the flavour of it is, the unique granular qualities of grey days in a Swindon suburb or whatever, but I'd also imagine it's just as ghastly dull in some small Dutch suburb of Maastricht or living in a shitey house on the outskirts of Porto or wherever the fuck.
Is that small town suburban mentality/way of life a uniquely British thing do you think?
|>>|| No. 430195
You could live right out in the countryside. Potentially it might be more boring, but it's not suburban boring.
|>>|| No. 430196
When the new neighbours next to my parents' house moved in, apparently they did some extensive kitchen remodelling, and they put all the parts of the old kitchen like cabinets and the cooking range in their driveway, half covered by a tacky looking tarp. After about three weeks of all those things just sitting in the driveway collecting dust and rain, my mum went over to the new neighbours and said, "This isn't the Bronx, you know. People are supposed to keep up a halfway tidy appearance of their property", and she threatened to ring the council and tell them. It still took them over a week to get all of it out of the driveway. But I think my mum was right to tell them. Their driveway really looked shit with all that clutter in it.
|>>|| No. 430200
If they had rented a skip would that be more or less of an eyesore?
House renovation get messy quickly and so long as the shit created isn't left for months the law has no issue.
Your mum sounds like hyacinth bucket
|>>|| No. 430201
Skip or no I love that I can just nick junk from neighbour's gardens. The longer they leave it out the longer I can find a use for it.
|>>|| No. 430210
This NIMBY shit remined me of an old /101/ post I made:
>The neighbor at my old flat conversion phoned up our tenancy management firm to complain that we left 2 bin bags next to the wheelie bin when we moved out because it was full, (the council offically won't take any overflow) with an expectation we would take care of the issue. The pettiness is on such a profound level I'm utterly bewildered. Even if they didn't take it they could have put it in the bin for next collection themselves it isn't like there is anyone else sharing the bin with them now.
>Epilogue: The bin men took the rubbish next to the bin anyway, but not the rubbish living in the upstairs flat sadly.
Honestly I fucking hate people >>430196 you included mummy's boy.
|>>|| No. 430212
We called the council when we moved out of a place asking how we'd get rid of the shit we were leaving behind, and they told us since it was a student area and we were moving out at the typical student time, they just send trucks out and to leave everything at the top of the street.
We left about two bin bags and an old chest of drawers, and the neighbour up from us went through the bin bags, found a letter with my name on it, found me on facebook and started sending me abusive and threatening messages about how he's going to do me in if he ever sees me again for dumping "all that shit". I told him it's what the council advised us to do and he shouldn't waste his time reporting it, and also asked him why he didn't stop us when he saw us leaving the stuff there (we had a conversation with him about us moving) but he didn't relent so I started pretending I was going to get him arrested for going through my bins and reading my letters, which I told him you could still technically be hanged for. I think he believed me for a message or two but I went too far in asking him what his lawyers name was etc, so he went back to calling me names so I just started sending him pizza deliveries to his house every few days, until he eventually messaged me back telling me to stop sending him pizzas to which I said "what the fuck are you on about, you psychopath?!" and he never replied.
I regret not going further, and I hope that lad's mam is terrorised in a similar fashion.
|>>|| No. 430215
>went through the bin bags, found a letter with my name on it,
You're meant to shred things like this. No wonder millennials are most likely to be the victims of bank fraud.
|>>|| No. 430217
If someone's rooting around in my bins they already know my address, and all it takes to find my name and address anywhere else is about 50p on 192.com.
|>>|| No. 430219
I did a student internship at a bank once, and one of the golden rules at banks is that nothing is just binned if it has any kind of sensitive data at all on it. Everything is shredded before it leaves the building.
So I've kind of adopted that for myself. I shred all my old receipts, drafts of letters I've printed out, and even most spam mail if it has my name and address on it. If you went through my bin bags, you wouldn't be able to draw any kind of conclusions about me that way.
Another thing banks do every night at closing is the lock in, where any and all papers and folders are locked inside cabinets, because while nobody openly distrusts cleaning personnel or night guards, they want to rule out the possibility entirely that documents are lost or taken by somebody.
|>>|| No. 430220
>>430181 The locals first reported me to council for running a business from home
How is that even a thing? Unless you're running a haulage yard or abbatoir, it's hard to imagine the council giving a solitary fuck.
My neighbours are great. (We all run businesses from home round here - some web forms when you type an address also list businesses, I'd say that >50% of addresses have at least one company registered.)
|>>|| No. 430221
>>430219 If you went through my bin bags, you wouldn't be able to draw any kind of conclusions about me that way.
I could conclude you were a shifty bugger with shameful secrets worth digging further for.
(I just let it accumulate during summer and burn it in winter, never had a shredder that lasted longer than a year, and shreddings are a pain to deal with)
|>>|| No. 430222
>I could conclude you were a shifty bugger with shameful secrets worth digging further for.
But how are you going to dig if all you'll ever get from me is shredded paper.
Are you going to analyse my eating habits from my potato peels or peach stones?
|>>|| No. 430223
>How is that even a thing? Unless you're running a haulage yard or abbatoir, it's hard to imagine the council giving a solitary fuck.
Councils make money from businesses.
|>>|| No. 430224
If I care enough to be rooting around in your bins, I'll nick your post, violate your network or just make things up. No need to stitch your shreddings back together (although surely that's automatable these days? Unshredding as a service?)
(Note - I don't care enough to root around in anyone's bins)
|>>|| No. 430225
There's plenty of reasons for a large business to shred client documents and it's mostly just to protect themselves. I'm not saying it's a good idea to leave your bank statements in the bin, but at the same time, I also know that when Barclays rings me telling me there's a problem with my account and they need my internet banking details to fix it, I'm not supposed to comply.
I take my computer data disposal far more seriously than my hard copies.
|>>|| No. 430226
Barely, since business rates went to zero for small ones. I do wonder if they'll ever go back.
|>>|| No. 430230
> found me on facebook and started sending me abusive and threatening messages about how he's going to do me in if he ever sees me again for dumping "all that shit"
Why didn't you simply tell this cunt to get stuffed?
He's not worth more words.
|>>|| No. 430233
>No need to stitch your shreddings back together (although surely that's automatable these days? Unshredding as a service?)
If you've got an old straight-cut shredder, then it's not hard at all to piece your shreddings back together, as they only slice the paper once vertically, a bit like a hand-crank pasta machine really. And then especially if you don't mix those shreds up well, the strands of paper will stay together in your bin bag in approximately the correct position relative to each other, so it's not hard at all to put the shredded documents back together.
There's a famous anecdote that right before the U.S. abandoned the Tehran embassy in 1981 during the Shamanismic Revolution, embassy employees shredded volumes of paper documents, but their shredders were also only straight-cut, and the revolutionaries who stormed the embassy then sent in scores of women who were tasked with piecing those documents back together. It must have been quite a shit job, but Iranian television then triumphantly showed images of the documents that those women were able to recover that way.
Long story short, almost all modern shredders are so-called cross-cut shredders, which means that in addition to cutting sheets of paper vertically, they will also be cut horizontally into strips about two inches long. Which should really complicate any attempt to piece those documents back together. Not saying it can't be done, but it should be a tough job even for any kind of computerised pattern matching software that you feed those bits of paper into.
|>>|| No. 430235
You could buy a new shredder or you could just mix the important shredded documents with something wet, preferably something wet and unpleasant like used cat litter or dog shit.
This is an actual PERSEC technique I got from some book or maybe a lecture by Hadenagy I'm not sure. It wasn't my idea anyway.
|>>|| No. 430236
After the fall of the DDR, the Stasi shredded 16,000 bags of secret documents. The German government are still piecing them together 30 years later. They were helped by the poor quality of East German shredders - a large proportion of the documents were torn up by hand after the shredders failed.
|>>|| No. 430237
Why wouldn't you burn your top secret info long before you started shoveling used cat litter and dog shit into your office shredder? And why didn't the DDR think of that? Am I the smartest secret agent alive? Will GCHQ give me a job now or does all the Edward Snowdon slash fiction I wrote disqualify me?
|>>|| No. 430238
There are organisations that do. Not only that but they feed false documentation into their rubbish. There was a incedent abot 15 - 20 years ago back when paper was more common where a 'journalist' working for one of the tabloids represented by Max Clifford exposed something and it was caught that way. Turned out he was a weird hoarder who went through peoples bins and that is how he had got a fair few 'exclusives on celebrities'.
The first reaction of the company in question that spotted someone was going through their bins and leaking it to the press was that GCHQ must be leaking because that was who usually went through their bins.
Apparently there is a significant cross over with paparazzi and 'secret agents'.
|>>|| No. 430240
I'd look a bit strange having fires all through winter but I throw out cat litter almost weekly. There's a lot of stuff just in regular post you get that if someone bothered to pull out of your recycling they could do a lot of harm with.
|>>|| No. 430241
Thanks for finding that and demonstrating I'm not wholly talking out of my arse.
The aspect that is neglected in that article is just how mental he actually is. His house was full to the brim with rubbish. Not just paper but biological waste from where he wouldn't even use the toilet.. He has full on hoarding tendencies.
|>>|| No. 430243
81LoE rY sL.jpg
One of my friends at uni here in Britain was a German lad from Leipzig, and he said that his family found out after the end of the GDR that the East German secret service had kept files on both his parents dating back to the early 70s. Apparently his parents were part of the social elite as his dad was a university professor, but being part of that elite didn't mean you were safe from the government spying on you. I think he told me something that in the run-up to the revolution in 1989, they weren't sure of his dad's continued allegiance to the system, and at some point they had operatives shadowing him and keeping track of minute details of his daily routine, from what he wore when he left the house to go to work in the morning, to how often he and his wife were having sex.
You sometimes wonder why the whole world was outraged by a government spying on its citizens and treating them like potential criminals, when today things like the Snoopers Charter aren't really doing anything different, except all the data is collected by faceless computer algorithms, and not by Stasi operatives peeping into your livingroom from across the street and taking notes.
Apparently, the film The Lives Of Others is one of the most accurate depictions of mass surveillance in East Germany. It was on BBC Four a few years ago, and I remember it really moved me.
|>>|| No. 430246
I live near a train station. On my days off work I get the train to the city. I spend my days and evenings there and then I come home.
I don’t think where you live ultimately matters. My 9-5s are at work, when I get home I do nothing. Weekends I want more, so I go elsewhere.
|>>|| No. 430268
Do you know how much emissions diesel trains pump out? I sincerely hope you're sticking to electrified lines.
|>>|| No. 430274
If there was supposed to be a nod and a wink of sarcasm I assure you it was lost in the crap delivery.
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