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>> No. 423285 Anonymous
1st January 2019
Tuesday 12:04 am
423285 First post of the year, lads

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VeJXm7Tquk0

Happy New Year, chaps
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>> No. 423392 Anonymous
5th January 2019
Saturday 11:17 pm
423392 spacer
>>423389

Same, especially if you can stick an earbud in and get through some podcasts and that.

Even if not I imagine it's quite relaxing (though probably eventually quite tedious)
>> No. 423393 Anonymous
6th January 2019
Sunday 12:33 am
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>>423389
For a uni job I can't really fault it - the breaks are decent, the pay is good, the shifts aren't ridiculous, and I get 10% off everything except cigs and fuel. 'Happy' would be an extremely, extremely strong word though.

>>423392
You can at some shops, but not this one. What you instead get is the same playlist in roughly the same order of generic family-friendly chart pop, though recently I've noticed they've started throwing some 80s greatest hits type stuff in there.

I think maybe in a quieter (or better staffed) supermarket it would be relaxing, but while it's not obligatory that you stack the whole night's delivery before your shift is up, it's assumed that you will - sometimes you'll be working right up until home time. Tedious to me has an 'active' component, like you hate doing it as you're doing it - to me it's more mind-numbing - my brain just shuts off.
>> No. 423394 Anonymous
6th January 2019
Sunday 12:49 am
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>>423393

>Tedious to me has an 'active' component, like you hate doing it as you're doing it - to me it's more mind-numbing - my brain just shuts off.

That's how I felt when I was washing dishes for a living. It was at a time when my brain shutting off for an evening was very welcome.

I used to jokingly call it meditative, but looking back, it actually was. I also really enjoyed a later job which was essentially opening oysters all day. Very relaxing, and just enough of a skill to feel like I wasn't wasting my life.
>> No. 423395 Anonymous
6th January 2019
Sunday 1:53 am
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>>423393
Oh if its a uni job, then even more power to you. You're not going to be "happy" as you intimate, but it will introduce you to two things - most jobs have long periods of shit (there is a reason they call it work), even the ones you love and are really good at. The second important thing I learned working in supermarkets and doing uni jobs - many of the people you work with are fuckwits; it's a useful life lesson to learn how to tolerate stupid people, gladly.
>> No. 423396 Anonymous
6th January 2019
Sunday 10:34 am
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>>423337
Well sod them then.
There's a rather strange trend I've started to notice at various places: the tendency to conform and to voice adherence to what would have been named at other places as 'normie values'. Do forgive me my parlance but any other more formal term doesn't exactly describe the thing.
Even the more insufferable places seem like buying it.
>>423345
Quite. Add a bit of shift work in the past, that makes every day look like the other one.
I didn't mind as in general I had more days off and that mostly justified the price to pay: sometimes having to work when everybody else is celebrating.

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>> No. 422516 Anonymous
1st December 2018
Saturday 12:05 am
422516 Christmas 2018
It's the first of December. It's that time of year again.

Open your advent calendar chocolates, listen to Andrew, put up your tree this weekend, put off the present shopping for at least a fortnight, surviving the Christmas party at work, watching shit on telly.

You know the drill by now, lads.
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>> No. 423278 Anonymous
31st December 2018
Monday 5:26 pm
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>>423277
It is though.
>> No. 423279 Anonymous
31st December 2018
Monday 5:53 pm
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>>423276
New Years day is a bank holiday m8. I should know because I seem to be the only fucker whose been at work the past couple weeks.
>> No. 423280 Anonymous
31st December 2018
Monday 6:37 pm
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>>423279
Plan ahead with your annual leave. I haven't been at work since the 20th and I'm not back at work until Wednesday and it's only cost me three day's holiday.
>> No. 423281 Anonymous
31st December 2018
Monday 7:15 pm
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>>423280
>Plan ahead with your annual leave.

But I am. While everyone else took leave over Christmas I've been doing nothing all day at work and come the annual heatwave I'll use my saved leave to take the month off with some change for messy long-weekends while the weathers good.
>> No. 423298 Anonymous
1st January 2019
Tuesday 1:53 pm
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>>423281
Well, that's another way to do it, aye.

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>> No. 420674 Anonymous
28th September 2018
Friday 5:39 pm
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Weekend thread: low sun being a cunt edition.
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>> No. 423260 Anonymous
30th December 2018
Sunday 1:52 pm
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>>423258

>see if you can get more off them

I've already got about 19.5kg more instant mash than I know what to do with. Why would I want more? I don't want to be going round the markets flogging bags of moody mash. My life is complicated enough without getting hassle off the council inspector about use-by dates and fucking EU labelling laws.
>> No. 423262 Anonymous
30th December 2018
Sunday 2:31 pm
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>>423260
Well, if you have enough of it leftover you could just let it all loose from a tall hill on a wet and windy day. I'm sure local residents will see the funny side once they set out on their surreal morning commute.
>> No. 423267 Anonymous
30th December 2018
Sunday 6:07 pm
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>>423260

If you cook all the mash and freeze it you can get around the law. Then you can just carve mash chunks off and stick it in the microwave to sell to students. Open a trendy mash bar, like people have done with cereal and crisp sandwiches. Give your neighbour 5% off the top to keep delivering you the goods, and once you've sold about half of your original haul you can likely afford a mash assistant to make the mash for you. Then you can concentrate on menu design and marketing (I can help you with that, my rates are scalable) If you're in a studenty area you could absolutely command about £3 per bowl of mash, that's three grand of pure profit per sack. You'd sell that in a fortnight at the very least in a populated city.

Once we've sold probably three or four sacks of short dated mash, your profit margin will likely allow for an overhaul of the premises, and the use of real, live potatoes, at which point the quality and perceived value of your operation will increase exponentially.

At this point you would hire an experienced chef to perfect the mash menu and start aiming for your first mention in the Michelin guide. While doing this we'd also be shopping for other locations and putting in place a plan to expand the business as a chain, or talking with food producers to strike a deal to sell an instant version of your famous mash in shops.
>> No. 423268 Anonymous
30th December 2018
Sunday 6:21 pm
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>> No. 423269 Anonymous
30th December 2018
Sunday 6:44 pm
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When I was in primary school they used to do mash potato with cheese on top as a rare treat. Do that.

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>> No. 423230 Anonymous
29th December 2018
Saturday 1:35 am
423230 ITT: Your life changes forever.
Stare into the face of Seinfinity, and you will know truth. Only through the magic of Seinfinity can one hope to gain true knowledge of the universe. The secrets of all existence lie within this thread.
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>> No. 423237 Anonymous
29th December 2018
Saturday 12:37 pm
423237 The Economics of Seinfield
Not OP but this is a website that uses seinfield clips to explain economics concepts.

http://yadayadayadaecon.com/
>> No. 423238 Anonymous
29th December 2018
Saturday 12:46 pm
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If we're just sharing Seinfeld stuff then there is a pretty good visual novel adaptation you can play:
https://www.pntgrm.com
>> No. 423239 Anonymous
29th December 2018
Saturday 1:03 pm
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>>423238

> a pretty good visual novel adaptation

Why?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oiDeMGzlCA0
>> No. 423242 Anonymous
29th December 2018
Saturday 4:28 pm
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I've never managed to get into this show but http://seinfelt.acrobat.com/page/105 are amusing.
>> No. 423243 Anonymous
29th December 2018
Saturday 7:33 pm
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>>423231

>You have an hour to make it more interesting.

So how is it more interesting now?

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>> No. 422161 Anonymous
22nd November 2018
Thursday 9:49 am
422161 Our fravorite tribesmen are back! and this time they are taking on Jesus
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-46286215

>An American man has been killed by an endangered tribe in India's Andaman and Nicobar islands.

>Fishermen who took the man to North Sentinel island say tribespeople shot him with arrows and left his body on the beach.

>He has been identified as John Allen Chau, a 27 year old from Alabama.

>Contact with the endangered Andaman tribes living in isolation from the world is illegal because of the risks to them from outside disease.

>Estimates say the Sentinelese, who are totally cut off from civilisation, number only between 50 and 150.

>Seven fishermen have been arrested for illegally ferrying the American to the island, police say.

>Local media have reported that Chau may have wanted to meet the tribe to preach Christianity to them.
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.
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>> No. 423073 Anonymous
20th December 2018
Thursday 10:39 pm
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>>423071
You could probably get people claiming that Santa Claus really existed, if you apply the standard criteria of historical investigation to the likes of Saint Nicholas, Father Christmas and whatever else he's based on.

Actually, is Santa Claus the modern equivalent of Jesus? He's effectively only existed in the form we recognise today for c. 150 years and all sorts of bollocks keeps getting added to it to make it seem plausible, to a certain extent.
>> No. 423074 Anonymous
20th December 2018
Thursday 11:06 pm
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>>423073

>You could probably get people claiming that Santa Claus really existed, if you apply the standard criteria of historical investigation to the likes of Saint Nicholas, Father Christmas and whatever else he's based on.

I struggle to see what you mean.
>> No. 423075 Anonymous
20th December 2018
Thursday 11:21 pm
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>>423074
Big bloke. Bushy white beard. Red and white outfit. Delivers presents to the kiddies.
>> No. 423076 Anonymous
20th December 2018
Thursday 11:33 pm
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>>423075

Yeah but everybody knows that's just an OAP (or dolescum) in a costume.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_d8vLQKC1k
>> No. 423185 Anonymous
24th December 2018
Monday 11:10 pm
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>> No. 420448 Anonymous
20th September 2018
Thursday 5:54 pm
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Right then, you moangy farts.

How do we make Britfa.gs great again? You've been whining about the lack of activity so let's have at it.
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>> No. 422556 Anonymous
2nd December 2018
Sunday 9:19 am
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>>422555
We prefer not to speak of them.
>> No. 423040 Anonymous
20th December 2018
Thursday 2:51 am
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>>420471
>where I ramble incoherently about how deeply in love with ContraPoints I've fallen
ContraPoints the transgendered atheist off YouTube (use to be Nykytyne2)?
>> No. 423047 Anonymous
20th December 2018
Thursday 1:33 pm
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>>423040
No, the other one.
>> No. 423069 Anonymous
20th December 2018
Thursday 8:35 pm
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>>423040
It needn't be hell with Nykytynell.
>> No. 423126 Anonymous
22nd December 2018
Saturday 11:01 pm
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Do you lads think some form of collaborative thread on /beat/ would work?

I haven't thought it through yet. Probably something like you post a song and someone recommends you another song they think you'd like based on it; that seems the most straightforward.

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>> No. 418310 Anonymous
2nd July 2018
Monday 1:01 pm
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New week thread.

What is happening in your life?
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>> No. 422826 Anonymous
11th December 2018
Tuesday 2:10 pm
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Dusseldorf... nothing bad happens in Dusseldorf, does it? Not since The War, anyway. I think I'll move there at some point.
>> No. 422828 Anonymous
12th December 2018
Wednesday 2:33 am
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>>422826

Isn't dussel also German for idiot, or something like it?

There was an elderly couple who lived across the street from my parents', and the wife was German.

You could sometimes hear her say to her husband "Du Bist Ein Dussel".
>> No. 422845 Anonymous
12th December 2018
Wednesday 9:54 pm
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So ARE Terry just survived the vote of confidence.
>> No. 422860 Anonymous
13th December 2018
Thursday 11:03 am
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>>422828
I think it is.
But then, the place is really called Düsseldorf and with those two points above the 'u' it seems to be a different thing. Not the idiot village.

[x] Autism. About time.
>> No. 422862 Anonymous
13th December 2018
Thursday 12:52 pm
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>>422860

The notorious German umlauts then.

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>> No. 422367 Anonymous
26th November 2018
Monday 4:45 pm
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Pack your wellies, bitcoinlads.

Any of you lot still invested?

(A good day to you Sir!)
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>> No. 422391 Anonymous
27th November 2018
Tuesday 12:59 am
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>>422378

I'm no financial expert, but if I theoretically had any profit from bitcoins I'd have sold it for cash (or bought goods anonymously to sell later) and either casino laundered it or just kept it under my mattress.
>> No. 422393 Anonymous
27th November 2018
Tuesday 1:28 am
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>>422385

From the looks of it they are treating it like a real currency rather than an asset, and as so speculative as to qualify as gambling (which is in my opinion rather generous of them), but with qualifier that "Whether any profit or gain is chargeable or any loss is allowable will be looked at on a case-by-case basis taking into account the specific facts" which is such an extraordinarily nebulous open-ended statement I'm amazed a body as litigious as HMRC would ever have the gall to print it.
>> No. 422396 Anonymous
27th November 2018
Tuesday 3:25 am
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>>422391

Under the Proceeds of Crime Act, casinos are required to record any transaction of over £2000 and verify the customer's identity. Cash under the mattress in any real quantity is riskier and less useful than you might think. HMRC and SOCA have some sophisticated and wide-reaching analytics tools; if the information from your tax returns, bank transactions and credit reference files suggest that you're living beyond your legitimate means, they can confiscate the lot unless you can prove where it came from.
>> No. 422404 Anonymous
27th November 2018
Tuesday 11:49 am
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>>422396

I make good money anyway and have lots of investments, it wouldn't be that notable for me to have extra money lying about. I can go to the casino and 'win' £1999 every night, that's fine.

Or, I can do what everyone else does and open a dodgy takeaway that makes a steady, convenient stream of income.

I'VE BEATEN THE TAX MAN
>> No. 422405 Anonymous
27th November 2018
Tuesday 11:58 am
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>>422404

>I can go to the casino and 'win' £1999 every night, that's fine.


Albeit not very likely. It will probably raise some flags if you tell them that.

Creative tax accounting is a simple game of numbers and probabilities really. You have to think about the likelihood of your tax fraud being exposed. While it is true that your net profits can be much greater that way, you have to factor in the repercussions if they spot it. So it's kind of a risk-reward thing. Being an honest citizen means you pay more taxes, but it also means HMRC will leave you alone.

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>> No. 422394 Anonymous
27th November 2018
Tuesday 1:35 am
422394 Baroness Trumpington
Fucking legend. Bletchley Park codebreaker, v-signs in the Lords, the sort of person that would definitely post here, had we existed fifty years ago.

Rest in peace lassm8.

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>> No. 422066 Anonymous
19th November 2018
Monday 6:48 pm
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waar gazza waz on da news today NEE GOOD NEWS?
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>> No. 422108 Anonymous
20th November 2018
Tuesday 11:29 am
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>>422103

So do you think the wordfilters are there to encourage this attitude? Even if not, that doesn't make sense, otherwise you'd be prioritising the creeping dolphin rape, surely?
>> No. 422109 Anonymous
20th November 2018
Tuesday 12:12 pm
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Is it just one person who is obsessed with this site being infiltrated by the alt-right or a bunch of them? There must be at least 5 threads in the last month derailed by accusations of trout farming.
>> No. 422110 Anonymous
20th November 2018
Tuesday 12:15 pm
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>>422103
And just like the Shamanism filters, they were inspired by old drama from posters who got bored and moved on years ago. Stop trying to rewrite the site's history to fit your bizarre narrative, the only evidence you seem to have for is "Be open-minded and you too can see the demon behind the curtain!", you raving lunatic.

I'd rather shit in my hand and clap than entertain your delusions any longer.
>> No. 422112 Anonymous
20th November 2018
Tuesday 12:22 pm
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>>422109
It's one guy, with a second on a mobile IP (probably the same guy), as others who thought he might have a point have since realised he is a mentalist. If he is sincere, I strongly suspect schizotypal personality disorder. He is banned from the local chipshop for a week, as this has travelled beyond the limit of my patience at this point as he has no argument and no proof.

Gazza shitposting can now resume.
>> No. 422113 Anonymous
20th November 2018
Tuesday 12:28 pm
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>>422109
The accusations of woman hating are largely from me, but other people have also noticed it previously. I think I've only derailed one other thread. The poster obsessed with the alt-right, who went off on one because of a YouTube screenshot being used as an OP image, is not me.

I'm going to give it a rest for now as it's getting us nowhere.

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>> No. 422017 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 9:16 pm
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Can anyone who has lived in a block of flats or who has friends who live in a block of flats tell me what methods of payment for electricity are used to provide electricity to flats?
I may be moving to a single flat in Nottingham and I am wondering whether the bills are split and averaged between several flats, or whether each flat has a prepayment meter or a traditional meter. Do I pay the electricity company directly or the owner of the building etcetera?
What have you seen?
Cheers
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>> No. 422019 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 10:07 pm
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>>422017

Depends. In addition to the things you've mentioned you also get councils operating as utility resellers who have to follow statutory and ombudsmen guidelines as to what they charge.
>> No. 422020 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 10:25 pm
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Set monthly payment for utilities to the landlord is what I've come to expect if you're renting something small for graduates. Sounds naff but it works out as a little cheaper in my experience. Be sure to check if the internet is included as that will mean you're locked into BT shite.

Bigger flats sort out their own utilities or if it's somewhere grubby you may even find one of those coin-slot things. This is a question for the agent/landlord.
>> No. 422024 Anonymous
15th November 2018
Thursday 5:11 am
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I've not had a coin meter since 1999. I've lived here ten years and it's a credit meter. In-between it was always prepayment meters with a paypoint card. With prepayment, they always lie to you and say you owe them money too. They send you a red letter after you move out. Last time I gave them my final meter reading over the phone they said 'whoops, we accidentally switched the rate 1 and rate 2 (12pm-7am) reading and you don't owe us anything.' They used the exact same excuse with my mate too.

I've known lots of people with prepayment meter who get periodic letters saying they owe money (How? It's prepayment.) and it's not an issue because they've not moved house or switched providers. In fast, they might do it to deter people from switching providers.
>> No. 422064 Anonymous
19th November 2018
Monday 9:57 am
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Forgive me my ignorance, but do people actually live in that... Babylon tower?
The friends across the pond had a bit of tough luck with this type of living quarters.
>> No. 422065 Anonymous
19th November 2018
Monday 3:29 pm
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>>422064

Apparently so. it's Farglory 95rich in Taiwan.

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>> No. 422056 Anonymous
18th November 2018
Sunday 5:22 pm
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>we have to FUCK people
Expand all images.
>> No. 422057 Anonymous
18th November 2018
Sunday 5:31 pm
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>>422056
U wot m8?
>> No. 422058 Anonymous
18th November 2018
Sunday 5:47 pm
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>>422056
Why do we have to do that?
>> No. 422059 Anonymous
18th November 2018
Sunday 6:42 pm
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I've found the video the still's from. It doesn't shed any light.

http://www.hermaion.it/2017/12/19/ti-prego-pensa-sempre-che-potresti-essere-in-errore/

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>> No. 421649 Anonymous
3rd November 2018
Saturday 3:44 pm
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https://twitter.com/giantpoppywatch

It's about that time of year lads. How do you plan on remembering our boys?
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>> No. 422009 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 2:01 am
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Clement Freud gave a talk at my school once. He was very funny.
>> No. 422010 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 5:26 am
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When I was about eight, my parents and my friend and I were walking around a lake. I'm a bit hazy on the details since it was a very long time ago. My friend and I were in a clearing or play area off the main path and my parents somehow didn't realise we were there and continued walking on the main path and got pretty far away. I could see them and they were shouting us.

This old man came up to us and asked what happened and we told him, and I said I could see them in the distance and they were shouting, and he said those people were too far away to be them and it was someone shouting his dogs.

I guess my parents started walking back towards us without us shouting back at them. I can't remember if the old man had asked us to go anywhere with him. When they arrived, he told them he thought my dad was shouting his dogs, and he laughed and replied that was true after a sense.

I said to my parents later I thought that was extremely suspicious he was trying to persuade me that wasn't them, but they were extremely dismissive and said he was a nice old man.
>> No. 422011 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 6:16 am
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>>422010

>I said to my parents later I thought that was extremely suspicious he was trying to persuade me that wasn't them

He might have just been making one of those old man jokes that you didn't pick up on. My grandad says stuff like this all the time to the younger kids in the family, weird shit like "you're not Kevin, you're Chris, don't you remember?".

Maybe he wouldn't be trying to wind up lost kids in the park though.
>> No. 422012 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 7:07 am
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No point remembering those who shall not grow old because chances are they'd have turned into elderly paedos.
>> No. 422013 Anonymous
14th November 2018
Wednesday 9:07 am
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AiFczKckL0

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>> No. 420756 Anonymous
29th September 2018
Saturday 9:14 pm
420756 THE PINK MIST
Any ladm7s watch gore? In my day it was the secret snuff VHS which had the social implications of handling underground weapons grade uranium but now thanks to the internet you can see Mexican cartels chopping up people alive and Indians chopped in half on railway tracks.
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>> No. 421462 Anonymous
31st October 2018
Wednesday 8:43 pm
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>>421458

I've no idea what this is but I'd bet my house that Garth Ennis has something to do with it.
>> No. 421463 Anonymous
31st October 2018
Wednesday 8:44 pm
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>>421462

Yeah. Crossed "Wish you were there".
>> No. 421464 Anonymous
31st October 2018
Wednesday 8:57 pm
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Not gore, but I found myself down the rabbit hole of watching "anti-Paul Joseph Watson" videos the other day.

What really fucked me off is that Septics cannot pronounce Nazi. Notzi. Posta. Kozakhstan. Holloween. They cannot properly say words where the second letter is an a.
>> No. 421466 Anonymous
31st October 2018
Wednesday 10:03 pm
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>>421464
Well, they're saying that /a/ correctly. It just sounds out of place because their other /a/s are all over the place. If your pronunciation of "NAFTA" somehow has an /e/ in it you're doing it wrong.
>> No. 421477 Anonymous
1st November 2018
Thursday 10:03 am
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>>421463
I loved that. Followed it from start to finish. It's a lot more than just gore.

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