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>> No. 426723 Anonymous
12th May 2019
Sunday 9:14 pm
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If you could go back in time and give your younger self advice what would it be?
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>> No. 426875 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 6:50 pm
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Katoey, you say?
>> No. 426876 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 6:57 pm
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I know... if it walks like a bloke, and talks like a bloke...
>> No. 426877 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 6:58 pm
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Isn't that just a flowery way of saying tranny. It still identifies them as other. When I assume a lot of them want to be card carrying women.
>> No. 426878 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 7:08 pm
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Aye but my saying is if it looks like a woman, I'm going to fuck them.
>> No. 426879 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 7:16 pm
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>> No. 364298 Anonymous
14th November 2013
Thursday 4:47 pm
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ITT: Weird dreams you've had lately.

I actually dreamed last night that I was in Australia, visiting the two blokes from the Foster's adverts in their beach hut. Sure enough, they gave me a Foster's, and I said "cheers, guys"... and then one of them said to me "oh no mayt, we don't say cheers heere. We say 'You little ripper!'"

Quite bizarre... has this dream got any deeper meaning, or have I just been watching too much telly lately?
1996 posts and 174 images omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 426823 Anonymous
15th May 2019
Wednesday 9:33 pm
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Had an utterly filthy sex dream about a long-time friend who I've never considered very attractive. She's not an uggo or anything, she's just never really caught my eye. But obviously now I've had this dream I definitely want to shag her, just in case she's as rampant as she was in the dream.
>> No. 426830 Anonymous
15th May 2019
Wednesday 11:43 pm
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I wouldn't call it a 'weird' dream but quite a vivid one where I was shouting at a load of familiar people how I was so sick of being lonely, seen as stupid and useless and subhuman. They seemed taken aback but that was all. Then I woke up.
>> No. 426834 Anonymous ## Mod ##
16th May 2019
Thursday 12:21 am
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2000 posts and 6 years, lads. Crikey. Time for a new thread, should anyone feel like sharing the minutiae of their sub-conscious they can have the honour of making it.
>> No. 426859 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 3:50 pm
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I had a dream that I was part of a small village, we were building this amazing, intricate building, interwoven with stories and thoughts from our deepest subconscious. All the townsfolk were proud of the building, and how it took years to construct. Whenever people visited, they were impressed with the quality and longevity of the work.

Then some cunt came over, barred the doors and set it on fire.

I wonder what it means?
>> No. 426870 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 6:17 pm
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>> No. 426479 Anonymous
7th May 2019
Tuesday 4:54 pm
426479 Name of the song?
Just placed my first ever proper bet. Come on Darude, don't let me down!
31 posts and 1 image omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 426540 Anonymous
8th May 2019
Wednesday 5:48 pm
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>roughly the same sort of person who shares Bake Off memes on Facebook.

I always thought the fan base of Eurovision was mainly poofs. Or do gays do that as well these days?
>> No. 426548 Anonymous
8th May 2019
Wednesday 6:36 pm
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Yesterday you lads had me to throw away a tenner on this and the picture of Greta eating hummus wrong influenced me into eating some myself before bed which, in turn, led to heartburn and a poorly tummy for most of the day.

Is this all part of your masterplan?

What's it like living in a world without campy fun?
>> No. 426558 Anonymous
8th May 2019
Wednesday 10:15 pm
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Is this all part of your masterplan?

>> No. 426808 Anonymous
15th May 2019
Wednesday 8:41 am
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Did we win?
>> No. 426809 Anonymous
15th May 2019
Wednesday 11:18 am
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>> No. 425508 Anonymous
30th March 2019
Saturday 10:00 am
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This might well be a daft question but, if I flew to Japan, bought a bike there, stuck it in a bike bag as my luggage and flew it back here, am I supposed to declare that? It'd be taxed if I had it delivered, so I assume so. But would they notice? Would anyone figure out I'd just bought the bike over there and hadn't just been returning with my own bike? It'd be hard to prove either way which country I bought it in as it'd be second hand anyway.
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>> No. 426785 Anonymous
14th May 2019
Tuesday 1:01 pm
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Quality wordfilter, mods. I meant to say "yoshi aki".
>> No. 426786 Anonymous
14th May 2019
Tuesday 1:13 pm
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I have no clue what either of that means, or why it would even necessitate a word filter.
>> No. 426793 Anonymous
14th May 2019
Tuesday 6:49 pm
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Speak English.
>> No. 426795 Anonymous
14th May 2019
Tuesday 7:37 pm
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You missed the space between the two words, forming another word in the middle of them.
>> No. 426796 Anonymous
14th May 2019
Tuesday 7:49 pm
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I'm just going to type Mi'kmaq to confirm to myself I've worked that out correctly.

>> No. 426175 Anonymous
24th April 2019
Wednesday 9:46 am
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Why does my pillow look like this?
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>> No. 426185 Anonymous
24th April 2019
Wednesday 12:55 pm
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>> No. 426187 Anonymous
24th April 2019
Wednesday 1:35 pm
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You didn't take your makeup off.
>> No. 426204 Anonymous
24th April 2019
Wednesday 4:11 pm
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Stop leaving your jizz in there during the night, mate. It's unhygienic
>> No. 426208 Anonymous
24th April 2019
Wednesday 7:23 pm
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Not sure jizz is supposed to look like that.
>> No. 426288 Anonymous
27th April 2019
Saturday 2:02 pm
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Bingo. Your prize is the illustrious chair picture.

>> No. 425967 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 2:14 am
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so porn is comming to an end my friends


what are you going to do now
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>> No. 426053 Anonymous
19th April 2019
Friday 7:05 pm
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One of the two main providers owns the majority of the free "tube" sites, and are less than rigorous when it comes to enforcing the copyright of their paid competitors whose content end up uploaded to said sites, so if they want to be competitive they'll have to do more than the bare minimum to get by.
>> No. 426101 Anonymous
21st April 2019
Sunday 8:45 pm
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Why the fuck am I paying taxes again? Surely at this point it'd be better to just burn the money.
>> No. 426119 Anonymous
22nd April 2019
Monday 1:18 pm
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If, and only if:

- I can go to a shop and flash my driving licence and buy a porn pass with a minimum of fuss, and
- it doesn't have a stupidly short duration before it expires, and
- they do not store ANY of my personally identifiable information when I purchase it

I will not overly care about this new law.
>> No. 426133 Anonymous
22nd April 2019
Monday 3:35 pm
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The problem is that your third bullet point is the main, if not only, reason this law is being passed at all.

I don't want to make this into one of those posts, but the current Tory line-up is bent as all fuck. Mrs May and her fella have fingers in all kinds of pies, including but not limited to medicinal cannabis. What we have here is pure US style cronyism, disguised under the thinnest veil of moral guardianship.
>> No. 426141 Anonymous
22nd April 2019
Monday 4:34 pm
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So do they have shares in MindGeek then?

>> No. 425307 Anonymous
19th March 2019
Tuesday 4:02 pm
425307 A picture is worth a thousand words Locked
Anyone seen this before or know where it was taken?
That's evelyn de rotschild poking charlie in the chest btw - seriously, who could get away with this?
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>> No. 425971 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 2:46 am
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You more likely got banned for using 'tactical' where 'strategic' is the correct term.
>> No. 425974 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 3:05 am
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hillary begging.jpg
Seriously though, why was I permanently banned and my post memory-holed for posting this image?

It's no real skin off my nose since I just got a VPN in preparation for the upcoming porn blockage so I'm just curious about what motivated the mod to do it.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 425975 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 3:17 am
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Because you're being a tedious cunt. WTF cares about some email that Hillary wrote to someone else? This is a British site and this bullshit is absolutely nothing to do with us, and you're a tedious cunt.
>> No. 425989 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 11:15 am
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Obviously because the mods are a cadet branch of the Rochchild dynasty and need to keep you shtum so the servers can stay funded.

Or you're a dickhead.
>> No. 425991 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 11:24 am
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Why would Hillary's email address be HDR22 on her own website? I feel like the real conspiracy here is who are HDR 1-21???

>> No. 425809 Anonymous
11th April 2019
Thursday 7:47 pm
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Confess, lads.

My brain has been addled from watching so much porn that whenever one of you recommends CBT I assume you're advocating a Cock and Ball Torture session.
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>> No. 425897 Anonymous
14th April 2019
Sunday 10:58 am
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I wonder if its a smell thing. I've definitely met people like that.
>> No. 425898 Anonymous
14th April 2019
Sunday 11:46 am
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Does she look like your son's girlfriend?
>> No. 425899 Anonymous
14th April 2019
Sunday 1:29 pm
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I think you might be right. Now that I think about it, I must have seen her on Instagram etc before meeting her, and don't remember going mental just looking at those. So she must just have the exact sort of pheromones that I like. I suppose that means we'd make exceptionally good children together, though I have absolutely no interest in doing that, either.
>> No. 425900 Anonymous
14th April 2019
Sunday 1:53 pm
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Do you want to give her a good old fashioned Arse Pissing?
>> No. 425915 Anonymous
15th April 2019
Monday 12:16 am
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There is one of my missus female friends with a similar things, but with an ugly twist: it looks like everybody wants to beat and/or rape her. She always looks like she has just been scared into submission. AFAIK, every one of her boyfriends either beat her like a punching bag or raped her. I cannot deny that I feel some strange urges every time I look at her, and she's not attractive or offensive at all, there is no reason why I should feel like this. No idea, I just keep her as far away as possible and I tell the missus that I do not like her.

>> No. 425579 Anonymous
31st March 2019
Sunday 10:48 pm
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Which of these looks best, lads?

Number one's fade should actually look as gradual as all the others, I'm just shit at photoshop, so bear that in mind.
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>> No. 425793 Anonymous
11th April 2019
Thursday 1:13 pm
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Just noticed there's no battery in that kit. I knew the price was too good to be true.
>> No. 425794 Anonymous
11th April 2019
Thursday 1:38 pm
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You can buy a (very good) electric kick-scooter for about the same price. They're technically illegal to use on the road in the UK, but you aren't going to get any bother unless you ride like a twat.

>> No. 425795 Anonymous
11th April 2019
Thursday 1:51 pm
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I don't want a scooter though.
>> No. 425798 Anonymous
11th April 2019
Thursday 2:54 pm
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Honestly, they're brilliant. E-bikes aren't great for long-distance stuff, because the battery conks out after an hour or so and you're left lugging a load of useless weight. They aren't great for short-range stuff, because they're too bulky to take inside. If you get a cheap kit, the waterproofing won't be great and you risk short-circuits if you leave it parked outside; if you get a fancy bike with an integrated Bosch drivetrain, it's too nice to leave locked up outside work.

Electric scooters are absolutely effortless for last-mile transport around town. Undo one clip and it folds up small enough to take on the bus or carry into a pub. You do look like a bit of a bell-end, but they're so much fun that you won't care.

I'd rather have a Brompton most of the time, but electric kick scooters just make a huge amount of sense.
>> No. 425808 Anonymous
11th April 2019
Thursday 7:02 pm
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You ever tried to do the groceries on a kick scooter? I didn't ask about ebike kits because I wanted a scooter m8.

Having said that I was in Austin last year and they have those Lime rental scooters all over the shop, they're great, and a much better solution than owning one. Far superior to the Mobikes up here.

>> No. 425641 Anonymous
4th April 2019
Thursday 6:29 pm
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Lads, it's that time of year again. Choose your filly.


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>> No. 425679 Anonymous
5th April 2019
Friday 9:11 pm
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Who wore it best?
>> No. 425680 Anonymous
5th April 2019
Friday 9:19 pm
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You mean which turd has been polished the best?

Those flabby tits on the left look a bit sad.
>> No. 425681 Anonymous
5th April 2019
Friday 9:57 pm
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I think it's more a case of sprinkling glitter on a turd than polishing it.
>> No. 425682 Anonymous
5th April 2019
Friday 10:07 pm
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It's still going to stink either way.
>> No. 426560 Anonymous
9th May 2019
Thursday 11:49 am
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Once we are going to have a generation of grandmas with wrinkly arses and tarty tats about them.

>> No. 425195 Anonymous
17th March 2019
Sunday 12:08 pm
425195 thinking
What is the best thing you have learnt from this, or similar, sites?

I guess one should ask the worst, too.
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>> No. 425357 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 8:30 pm
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Just listen to Necro's "Dead Body Disposal" for a basic recap.
>> No. 425359 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 8:50 pm
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I moved into student housing my second semester, and we had our own subnet server on which we could share folders. I downloaded ludicrous amounts of music, but also stand up comedy and other material off other people's folders. There was an American studentlad living in the same building who had plenty of George Carlin and Chris Rock audio stand up material in his folder, and that was pretty much the first time I heard of either of the two. Movies in decent quality were few and far between around the subnet, and this being the days of 100 Mbit intranet bandwidth shared by up to 255 users, file transfers could be slow at peak times. But with our own T2 line to the outside world and file sharing clients slowly gaining a following, you had all the movies you wanted at your disposal off the Internet. Well, until student housing informed us of new copyright guidelines that both commanded server admins to block most HTTP ports used for filesharing, and meant that we had to sign agreements that we would not use the subnet server or the Internet connection to violate copyright laws regarding films and music. And that was kind of when all the fun stopped. By then I was just a month away from moving out, but it kind of ruined the fun for everybody else. Enforcement of the new rules was hit and miss I was told, but you could risk losing all user privileges.

Self sage for derailing the thread. Do talk more about what you've learnt on here.
>> No. 425360 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 9:26 pm
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Walk quietly among other men but know their power for they are your enemies; quietly crush them as you work diligently through the night. Pay attention to the man behind the curtain for he is your ally. Drink deeply and lustfully from the foamy draught of evil. Do it to the other guy before he does it to you. Generally just be bad to the bone.

Thanks ladm8s
>> No. 425549 Anonymous
31st March 2019
Sunday 10:04 am
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>A few people have commented, unprompted, about how they enjoy a particular sort of post I sometimes make, and it's such an amazing feeling to have someone complement you completely blindly like that.
Yeah. It's embarrassing how much that perks me up.
>> No. 425552 Anonymous
31st March 2019
Sunday 10:44 am
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I've said it before but Datalounge has a "WW" (wit and wisdom) button you can click to like someone's post, and it sends them a push notification, but doesn't publicly say how many likes a post got. It's a lovely feature.

>> No. 425438 Anonymous
27th March 2019
Wednesday 3:33 pm
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A neighbour installed a fence between our houses. A survey shows that it's on our land. They refuse to remove it. Are we legally allowed to remove it?
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>> No. 425481 Anonymous
28th March 2019
Thursday 9:23 pm
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I agree with these, lads. Dickheads are always solved by the application of immediate and maximum force. No point in being a lawyer about it because that's what they feed off.

Not that I'd tell you to commit arson or anything.
>> No. 425489 Anonymous
29th March 2019
Friday 3:01 pm
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They're first generation devout Christians, so I doubt they'd do anything like that.
>> No. 425520 Anonymous
30th March 2019
Saturday 2:01 pm
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I can see both sides of this debate, and, well...

Nope, I don't have anything to contribute. I just wanted to let you know that I can see both sides of this debate.
>> No. 425521 Anonymous
30th March 2019
Saturday 2:13 pm
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Would you say you're on the fence?
>> No. 425524 Anonymous
30th March 2019
Saturday 2:22 pm
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>I can see both sides of this debate
So clearly the fence isn't that much of an obstruction.

flockdraw goblin.png
>> No. 425340 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 8:05 am
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Hypothetically speaking, would it be legal to download the video of the Christchurch shooting?

(A good day to you Sir!)
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>> No. 425341 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 9:28 am
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I could give you the answer but the lack of honesty of your post sickens me.

I don't know why people think saying stupid phrases before what they intend somehow removes culpability.
>> No. 425342 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 10:35 am
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Not sure why you would want to, but why would it be illegal? There are death and shock videos all over the web. We are not in the dark ages of the video nasty era anymore.

>> No. 424829 Anonymous
7th March 2019
Thursday 10:33 pm
424829 Such a great image
Almost poetic.
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>> No. 425230 Anonymous
17th March 2019
Sunday 9:05 pm
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Is that you, author of How to Lose Friends and Not Influence People?
>> No. 425297 Anonymous
19th March 2019
Tuesday 8:24 am
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I repeat call centre jockies' names back to them when I greet them - semi-sincerely because I know they are only instructed to tell us their name, but I bet hardly anyone else remembers what it is when they are told it so what's the point otherwise.
>> No. 425300 Anonymous
19th March 2019
Tuesday 11:28 am
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If you have a problem, it's good to know the name of the person you spoke to, so I make a note, and acknowledge their name. At the end of the call, I thank them by name for their time. If it's a complaint, I remind them that it's not personal. It also helps me remember that behind the script there's an actual person, and the poor sod has probably had to put up with all kinds of bullshit from other callers. I'm not naive or self-centred enough to think it'll be the highlight of their day, but I would like to think I haven't made their day any worse.
>> No. 425302 Anonymous
19th March 2019
Tuesday 12:39 pm
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When I have to ring another company at work I always take a note of the name of the other person at the other end of the line; often you can tell they're pleased you remembered their name if use it later on in the conversation. I mainly do it because I'm primarily ringing life companies like Prudential so I'm talking to young Scottish lasses and their accent seriously gives me the horn.
>> No. 425303 Anonymous
19th March 2019
Tuesday 12:54 pm
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This is probably the right way about it, but there are some absolute Carnegie Cunts as t'otherlad puts it, the sort of person who'll try to crowbar your name into every other sentence. That sort of shit makes me rapidly dislike someone, it's obvious they're just trying to be manipulative.

What Carnegie said about using people's names in terms of naming projects or whatever after them to make them more motivated to do the work relating to them well sounds like decent advice however.

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