>>299277
Well into my second mate.

>>299265

My ex wants to be friends but it's too hard for me as it's misleading to fuck.

We go out and do stuff like we did when we were together, maybe that's fine for her to handle because she's over it, but it messes my head up so I guess I'm not over her at all. I misread it as her wanting to build things up again and try again at the relationship, made a tit of myself asking if she wanted to get back together. To be fair it doesn't help when she calls me at 4 in the morning drunk and wants to reminisce about being together.

Women, man.

Anyway, in relation to thread, I am working tonight and tomorrow night, and Sunday I'll be going out to a club where I'll chew my jaw off and not speak to any girls whatsoever.

>>299279

Me and my last girlfriend did it properly. Broke up, hugged, and haven't spoken to eachother for n months. She did get in touch to ask me if I'd like some things back, but she's so lazy she probably couldn't be bothered to bring them around to mine anyway. So again, not a word shared.

Trust me, chaps, there are some girls out there so unappealing, relationships so unfulfilling, that they make you count your blessings to be a single man.

Now get onto your next glass and cheer up, it's Friday for bollocks sake.

There's a whole bunch of police officers on my road, apparently there's some sort of criminal they are chasing after. I had a word with one of the officers and it seems this lad is jumping through gardens to get away from them. I should not have gotten this drunk this early tonight.

>>299282

I hope this is a Britfa.gs twist, turning out that they are in fact looking for you. Having climbed into someone's kitchen from their garden, necked a bottle of Gin and then forgotten you don't live there. Now posting from the poor house-owner's laptop.

>>299223

Black has already lost, from wasting too many tempo in the opening. White's pawns are already too advanced to provide black with room for adequate development. Black will come off worse in any exchange fought over d5; At the very least he'll end up positionally compromised.

Best option here is probably Nd7, saving the knight and giving some cover for developing pawns. That said, it's a disastrous opening for black and I'd probably resign.

Also, I'm turning the board the right way round.

Always wanted to learn to play chess. I know the rules, but I'm rubbish at it.

I just e-mailed my Uni chess society to see if they meet up over the summer as this thread reminded me, actually. Maybe someone can tutor me to greatness.

>>299254
I did try to make him the bishop but couldn't make him recognisable so small, I didn't have any otter ideas. If anyone else can manage to do it I won't be offended.

>>299273

OP here - Nd7 then?

I made it black on the bottom because that would be your point of view in an actual game.

>>299293

Not him but yeah, go ahead. It's the best of a bad situation.

>>299287

Generally I find the best way to combat an attention whore is to avoid drawing attention to them. In this, you have already failed. I didn't even notice until I read your post.

How are your travels, >>299259? What're you up to?

>>299288
The cheap everyday essentials ones.

Seriously.

>>299291
Alright then, but if I get those and they turn out to be wank I will blame you when I have to wait another few months to finish them and buy better ones. Cheers.

>>299292
>wait a few months

Lad, you should be going through a box a week. There is no justification for not doing so.

>>299297
I tried to think of a good excuse to try and defend myself, like living alone, or trying to cut down on caffeine, but really the truth is that I sometimes drink beverages other than English tea and I am just an awful, awful person.

>>299286
>You said it was avoidable, why didn't you avoid it?

I don't know. I honestly don't. All it would have taken was a little nudge on the autopilot. When you've got the con of a big ship you just get used to everything getting out of your way I suppose. And normally dolphins and the like just part for you or swim alongside, so I guess we all just silently assumed it'd do the same. I wish I hadn't brought it up now, it's starting to bug me again. Another night of brooding in a dark room drinking rotgut and glaring out the window again beckons.

>>299289

I was wondering why you didn't avoid it either, considering the fact that you were all worried about your damaged instruments etc. If it was that you didn't care I could've at least understood why the crew did it.

Whale killer, your captain didn't happen to be missing any appendages, did they?

Why should the size of the animal have any bearing?

I never understood the arbitrary limits most set for 'that is fine to kill' and 'that is terrible'. I've even heard vegans support the idea of oyster farming.

If taking one sort of life bothers you, why overlook others? I kill maybe one lobster a day, but hundreds of mussels.

>>299296
Oysters are totally devoid of sentience, and lack a nervous system. And oyster farming is far more sustainable than other types of fish farming. It's not an arbitrary decision based on size, it's a well grounded ethical consideration.

Why was OP banned?

>>299237 >>299190

One of the moderators' "hilarious" comedy bans, I suspect.

(A good day to you Sir!)

>>299239

>>299239

It's fairly obvious that the mod in question was one of the brum mandemz. I bet he wishes he was in this video.

http://www.youtube.com/v/SOktFLZbOfw

>>299249
wtf! I'm in that video!

>>299095

I said >>explicity<<. This one actually serves a practical purpose, too.

>>299121
The Thames doesn't prevent people from travelling this route today. It might save a 10 minute walk from Canning Town to Royal Victoria, but that's about it.

>>299169

Oh, so because it isn't saving more than 10 minutes that makes it OK to market it as purely a tourist attraction? The govt. is spending billions on shaving 20 minutes off the journey to B'ham with HS2, so it's justified for us to complain about having to walk an extra 10 minutes due to extortionate prices.

>>299211
I thought HS2 had been derailed for the time being due to the amount of opposition and the incredibly shaky and fib-ridden case they put forwards for it? I was under the impression that they'd retreated to their bunker for a while to come up with a better way to sell this london centric bullshit moneypit to the plebs who have to foot the bill.

>>299221

err.. then you thought wrong.

>>299171 In case you haven't noticed there's a recession on. Don't expect finding work to be easy. It may be possible through connections in the Aussie community but you probably won't be able to walk straight into a job. Be prepared to support yourself through periods of unemployment.

>>299178
Haha. That sounds brilliant. I have a slight deficiency in that I dropped out of school with fail grades and have no qualifications. Are there labouring positions or other such things which don't require or don't care about CVs etc. I know this makes me sound like a mong, but I'm not. I just paid no attention in school so I failed.

Would a bar job support me through my 2 years with me bills and other expenses?

>>299185
Plenty of Aussies live on bar jobs, walk into any pub in London and you've got a 50/50 chance of seeing an Aussie manning the pumps. Though a lot of them share rooms with mates to cut the costs in half.
You could try out for manual labouring , though you'll be getting some stiff competition from big chaps known as Pavel.
If you've never been to Europe before, you WILL lose your shit when you get into town and be reduced to some slack jawed, pointing yokel going "OMG LOOK AT THAT", thankfully this doesn't last long and soon you'll be as jaded and immune to your surroundings as the rest of us.

>>299186
Haha, brilliant. My main concern is my lack of experience in bar work and of course my dreadful educational history. I would imagine pub managers won't be too fussed about that over there as pouring a jug of beer is piss easy, but your economy and job market leaves something to be desired. I just don't want to get over there and be unable to get even the most menial of jobs because 'i cannot into school'.

>>299185
>I know this makes me sound like a mong, but I'm not.
I don't think it does. I'll go further and say the people who'd make that judgement are a little simple themselves. Nobody who drops out of school with no qualifications because of inability will ever learn to write nearly as well as you do (i.e., competently).

So I got a number from one of the girls I work with. Ironically I was in the same store a few years back and got a number from a different girl who was working the same till I was on today, who I now work with. I never called her. Anyway, I had my eye on a different girl but she's stuck up and this one is cute and amiable, so.

Anyway, I was talking to her for a bit today casually while we were working together and around the end of the night I said:

"Hey <name>, you wanna hang out some time?"
"Sure."
"Outside of work, obviously"
"Mhm"

And then I realised I should get her number so as she walked back by before clocking out I said:

"Hey, can I get your number before you leave"

And she wrote it down and gave it to me, and Now I have it, so that's that. So I guess now I'll text her and try to bring her over and fuck her, but I'm not sure what she's expecting from me.

>>299158

And as with the the last time I got laid this is where gs comes in, apparently

>>297201
I think (s)he misunderstood and thought you were stating what you were linking too instead of who you were linking for.

>>299159>>299159
Britfa.gs

For when you cant function socially by yourself.

>>299163
>what you were linking too
Johnny Foreigner generally doesn't do this. Pull your socks up, mate.

>>299123

Well if you're using Firefox you could always install cache viewer and dig through it all and hope you can distinguish your post between all the other web pages you've got in your history. I actually want to read it, I love these. Or you could type it out again, just so I can go to sleep after becoming a bit happier from reading how miserable you are.

>>299120
I'm debating whether to type up a baww on /emo/ but you lot will just take the piss.

>>299144

That's not allowed on /emo/

>>299127
Using Chrome. The thought of typing it out again makes me feel sick. I've just been wandering around college, bumping into random freshers, smoking weed with them or bitching about men with them, and I just need someone to talk to so badly. I've been doing this since 1am. I wish some of the other Christians would wake up.

>>299149
I'm sure it'll happen anyway, but oh well. I've typed it up.

>>299126
/news/

>>298245 Sort it out lad, the only people who said they'd do it were summing up the benefits for themselves and/or taking the piss.

Why you would take this thread so seriously and insult people on what you imagine their political leanings to be is beyond me.

>>298257

Still no. Would you?

>>298267

Oh do shut up, you patronising arsehole.

>>298066
>implying complex political ideologies can be represented by a 1-dimensional scale

>>298426

Unfortunately for you, monarchism is not a 'complex political ideology'.

In real life I'd probably survive, due to being young and healthy and bullets not being all that bad if they don't hit a major organ. It's 2012 people don't just die any more. OP sets it up by saying I'll probably die though, so I don't think I'd risk it.
I'm opposed to the monarchy but letting the Queen die won't kill the rest of the royal family. If there was a good chance I'd pull through I'd do this for almost anyone, particularly her because I might get a knighthood out if it. On the other hand, if it's going to kill me then forget it. I don't want to die.

In reality I wouldn't have the balls anyway. I might try to rush the gunman but I'm not getting in the line of fire if I can help it.

>>299087

Anyone in mind?

>>299089

$61 billion buys an awful lot of protection.

>>299094

The very hint he was trying to sell his stock would send the value of it massively downwards. He'd never sell it all for anything like its true value. (ratner effect).

Sage for nit picking autism.

>>299096
It's like they say - if you're owed $61,000, your debtor has a problem; if you're owed $61 billion, you have a problem.

My once proud fatherland :(

>>299078
I've never heard of him but simply knowing of a person doesn't suddenly mean you're a fan. I've heard of Snooki, Bieber, Jedward, Chris Crocker, etc but not through my seeking them out. Stop being snobby pricks.

>>299080
There's never anything wrong with knowing more, simple as that, so relax. Being dismissive of other people's knowledge is just as pointless as being proud of one's ignorance; both are pretty childish behaviours.

>>299078
>>299080
I just Googled him. To be honest.

>>299091
In the abstract, sure, there's nothing wrong with having more information.
But >>288037 was implying there was something wrong with looking like an obscure teen idol. If there is something wrong with looking like a teen idol, then knowing who he is without the excuse that people tell you that you look like him, is further wrong. If neither are wrong, then 228037 is wrong for saying 299033 is wrong.

>>299193
If by "288037" you're referring to >>299037, which was me, I was actually half-implying that looking like a teenager meant you should be banned for being under-18.

I also fully expected the 'joke' ban when I posted it. Mods are getting too predictable.

>>299065
I think we can agree that the railways are a pretty special economic case, hardly comparable with the supply/demand economics that dominate retail.

Popularity of a route usually indicates necessity of its use, and exploiting commuters who have very little other choice is simply abhorrent.

>>299065
The main reason people think they should operate in a way that very few other businesses operate in is that they operate for a purpose and in a structure that very few other businesses operate in.

Think you can do a better job selling oranges than the guy down the street? Go ahead and open up shop. No need to apply to a government regulator, where your competitors get to veto your offering claiming that it would interfere with them, then put in a request to a government department for permission to acquire equipment, then persuading someone to buy the equipment for you to lease from them, etc. Also, pure market pricing in public transport leads to wrong-headed thinking. After all, there's a reason it's called public transport.

>>299065
True it just seems strange to me that I can travel further for less money, dry your eyes lad I wasn't trying to make some socio-economic point.

>>299065
And while I understand businiesses will do what you are saying to some degree, those that do it blatantly (i.e. so I actually notice) do annoy me, I don't like to deal with such fiddlers. Believe it or not, honesty is worth something in business, whether or not your A-level textbook says so.

>>299069

Pricing for rail tickets is nothing out of the ordinary. You see exactly the same thing in any other business with similar demand patterns, like airlines or hotels. Peak, super-peak and off-peak pricing, designed to fill as many seats at the best possible price. It's basic business.

Large commercial customers like factories pay for electricity on an adaptive pricing system, where the cost-per-unit varies minute by minute with demand. This turns out to have a miraculous benefit.

The British electricity business has a weird trait that exists nowhere else in the world, called the "TV pickup". During the ad breaks in Coronation Street or The X Factor, demand for electricity suddenly surges by about 40%, because millions of people simultaneously put the kettle on. This demand surge is incredibly difficult to deal with, because it all happens faster than a gas power station can spin-up. The grid has to somehow meet that extra demand, so we built a load of hydroelectric facilities to provide instant-on capacity. We even import power from France, using transmission lines that were installed solely to cope with the TV pickup.

Adaptive pricing is starting to change all that. Many factories now schedule their production systems around TV ad breaks, to use as little as possible of that expensive super-peak power. Many of them schedule shift-patterns or breaks to suit, or pause very energy-intensive processes like welding or electrolysis. The factories are happy, because they pay less overall for the same amount of electricity. The National Grid is happy, because they don't have to fork out for a ton of extra infrastructure to cope with the TV pickup. We're happy, because the costs of that infrastructure don't get passed on to us.

The railways face almost exactly the same issue. Peak commuter services are running at the absolute limit of capacity, but trains an hour earlier or later have plenty of space. There's just no way to fit more trains into that window of peak service without creating safety issues, due to braking and signalling distances. It wouldn't be difficult for companies to change from a fixed 9-5 schedule to a flexi schedule, to allow some of their employees to start at 8am or 10am. This would take the strain off the railways and allow their employees to buy cheaper season tickets, which would implicitly pass on a wage saving to their employers. This is exactly what we're expecting to see during the Olympics, when London rail routes will be loaded far beyond capacity.

The flipside of monstrously expensive peak-time fares is the dirt-cheap advanced saver fare. If you're prepared to fill a seat that nobody else wants, you can get it for buttons. The simple evidence for the success of that policy is that Virgin have fewer empty seats than any BR route pre-privatisation.