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>> No. 14492 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:15 am
14492 Minor rants and piss-offs. MK II Locked
As there are lot of threads with few replies - lets keep the small stuff in one place.

Random things that have pissed you off lately.


(Sorry to the lad who posted, grammar is golden in these parts).
Expand all images.
>> No. 14493 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:17 am
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144931449314493
I got a new suit and everything.
>> No. 14494 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:17 am
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I shouldn't even be surprised at this stage. If you couldn't get it right after 3 tries, I doubted you'd be able to not fuck it up after 4. Why did you have to prove me right?
>> No. 14495 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:17 am
14495 spacer
Shouldn't that be "let's"?
>> No. 14496 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:19 am
14496 spacer
>>14495
>>14494
Oh fuck you both.

I'm off to bed.
>> No. 14497 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:19 am
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>>14495
Ahahahahahahaha
>> No. 14498 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:22 am
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>>14494
This.
>> No. 14499 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:24 am
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>>14493
So why didn't you go to your interview?
>> No. 14500 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:26 am
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>>14495
You lot are a pack of absolute rotters and I feel honored to have shared this moment with you.
>> No. 14501 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:27 am
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>>14499
I did. Wasted a whole day going to it, £30 on the train, and a whole two days preparing for it. Fucking angry.
>> No. 14503 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:35 am
14503 spacer
Can you please just pick up the roll of bog roll and stick it on the fucking holder? I mean really, did you really have to leave three sheets on the holder only so you could use half a fucking roll and leave it on the cistern? Really? Sort it out. Use that loo roll or chuck it. There is no try, just fucking move that roll onto the holder.
>> No. 14504 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:37 am
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>>14501
Seems a right cunt move to send you something like that then.
>> No. 14505 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 2:14 am
14505 spacer
Some bellend crossed a road with oncoming traffic the other day knowing full well that he'd cause problems in order to look hard to his mates.

Because of that I got home a little later because the road was fucked up and I'm pretty sure they're the same lads who thought it was funny to kick a bird to death near my driveway as I was having a cigarette.

Just lads who think they're rough when they'd get seven shades of shit kicked out of them if they did this shit only a mile away.
>> No. 14507 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 11:55 am
14507 spacer
>>14501
Kinda obvious but have you tried ringing or directly emailing someone to inform them of the fault in the system?

Although it does make me wonder whether I actually want to work for a company when parts of their application system are outrageously broken. Recently applied for a job at a very high profile international firm and had to grapple with a great deal of broken links and links leading to non-existent information.

I often feel the desire to phone up and abuse HR staff who reject me from jobs without any kind of constructive criticism. Usually I don't in case I ever want to apply there again.
>> No. 14508 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 12:13 pm
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"Vines" piss me off because they're not funny.
>> No. 14509 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 12:33 pm
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>>14508

Honestly anything to do with twitter is shit. It's the worst on-line community, worse than youtube comments.
>> No. 14510 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 12:55 pm
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You don't get enough peas in the small tins for an adult man to have with his tea but the big tins contain far too much. The same problem exists with beans unless you like to have your entire meal swimming in the sauce.

Theoretically I should just be able to stick half of a big tin in the fridge but that is always is a state of overflow from milk and cream cheese (and all the shit my roommates shove in there). The Freezer is in a worse state.
>> No. 14511 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 12:59 pm
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>>14509
I don't think twitter is a 'community' any more than a mobile service provider is.
>> No. 14512 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:06 pm
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>>14510
Same with mushy peas and baked beans. I just want a little to go with my fry-up, I don't want to be eating nothing but fucking legumes.
>> No. 14514 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:10 pm
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>>14510

These little round ones are enough to hold exactly half a tin and take up hardly any space in the fridge. You can get them from poundland, I've got loads of them. Very useful.
>> No. 14518 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:15 pm
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>>14509
I don't end up on Twitter very often (don't even have an account), but averaging from what I've seen between the two, Twitter sees nothing close to the levels of rampant idiocy found in YouTube comments.

>>14512
Has anyone tried those tubs of baked beans? How long do they actually last after you open them?
>> No. 14519 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:19 pm
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>>14518

Twitter's worse because it's full of over-sensitive "celebrities" who think they're being bullied, when they get the same treatment everyone else has been getting on the internet for decades.
>> No. 14520 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:30 pm
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>>14519
I realised after posting that I probably only end up on Twitter when I'm reading posts by someone for whom I already have a modicum of respect, whereas my YouTube habits are all over the place.
>> No. 14522 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 1:42 pm
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>>14514
Cheers.
>> No. 14525 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 2:32 pm
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>>14519
Twitter has made me lose a lot of respect for various celebrities. These articles are worth a read.

http://richardhcooper.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/look-at-conduct-of-graham-linehan-and.html

http://comedychat.co.uk/2012/09/05/comedians-using-their-fans-for-co-ordinated-safety-in-numbers-bullying/
>> No. 14530 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 3:53 pm
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>>14514
Except don't get them from poundland, I made that mistake and I basically had leakages, left, right and centre. Get the ones from Tesco - the seal is much tighter and thicker and will ensure your bag isn't swimming in gravy.

My own personal rant:

I was in the gym yesterday, thought I'd got for a nice cycle as the spinning classes aren't on and I'd have the entire floor to myself. As I'm cycling, some woman, assuming staff, walks over to the PA / sound system, turns it on, and puts on the most god-awful, 90's dance you could imagine (think Darude-remixes).
My issue was with the fucking volume, it was outrageously loud, and this is coming from someone who frequents gigs regularly.

In fact I hate that - that need to randomly turn up the volume of (shit) music at parties and events. As some kind of means of encouraging people to let loose and dance. Fuck right off and leave me to my conversation.
>> No. 14531 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 3:58 pm
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>>14530
I know how you feel

Everytime I'm in work I can relax until someone decides they want the radio on and they turn it on to Capital FM. I wouldn't mind pop music but they repeat the same songs every hour.
>> No. 14532 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 4:10 pm
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>>14531

Mate, had the same issue. Luckily, by the grace of some annoyed worker, we all got an email to keep the music off.

Thank you disgruntled professor.

If it really bothers you, a quiet word with HR (who love all these internal conflict spats), would at least require them to send an email around.
>> No. 14533 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 5:05 pm
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>>14525
>http://richardhcooper.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/look-at-conduct-of-graham-linehan-and.html
That's one of the least interesting things I've ever read. Thanks for reminding me why I don't bother with fucking Twitter, I suppose.
>> No. 14537 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 6:22 pm
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>>14525
Ah yes, I remember seeing that Noel Fielding screenshot in a /v/ thread. The man is an utter twat.
>> No. 14544 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 6:45 pm
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My dear Father just accused me of stirring my coffee "like a woman". Apparently one should obnoxiously whisk their coffee in the manner of an idiot baker to avoid being outed as some sort of café-transvestite.
>> No. 14555 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 8:34 pm
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>>14544

This whole "emasculation" mode of insults is boring and tired in this day and age.

I give your dad some slack as he's from a different time, but hearing lads say things like "oi m8, thats what a woman would do" or like you've described, is just pathetic.

Yawn.
>> No. 14558 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 8:42 pm
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>>14555
>in this day and age.

I know right, anyone who isn't a gendersuperfluid pansexual seamonkey in this day and age should just shut the hell up about everything.
>> No. 14562 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 8:49 pm
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>>14544
Tell him he throws insults like a girl.
>> No. 14563 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 8:49 pm
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>>14544

My father used to insult me for being emotionally attached to women.

"I think it's time for a trade-in."
"I can trade in my phone?"
"I meant your girlfriend."
"I'm in love with her..."
"Don't act like a faggot."
>> No. 14565 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 8:53 pm
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>>14544
Maybe you should remove the bracelet and rings from your stirring hand.

Though according to that smoking thread I think I smoke like a girl due to the way I hold my cigarette. I've been swapping techniques. So far I like the stealth grip.
>> No. 14568 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 9:51 pm
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Whenever my dad compares me to a woman or implies I'm unmanly or a member of the gays (I work in nursing, so it happens fairly regularly) I just start mincing about the room and do my best impression of Fred from the B52s.
>> No. 14570 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 10:17 pm
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>>14555

>In this day and age

He's hardly an old man. He likes to pretend he is but he was born in the 60's and spent the 90's dancing about to that most macho of men Jarvis Cocker.

Everyday we grow stronger and they grow weaker .gs, this is why they say these things. We'll see who's the woman when I'm holding insulin shots.
>> No. 14572 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 10:26 pm
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>>14565
>smoke like a girl

How the bollock does one achieve this? Do you tie a little ribbon bow on the filter before you light up? I'm mystified.

That's probably a thing in Japan. Those girls will put rhinestones on anything.
>> No. 14573 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 10:34 pm
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>>14572

Holding the cigarette like this.
>> No. 14574 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 10:37 pm
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Tube strike in London, and the number of rusty-chained, uninflated tyres sporting, trundling along at 10mph come rain, shine or red light numpties is through the roof. Worse yet, the carbon biked eedjits finally making true in their promise to cycle to work, stand up sprinting to their awesome pace of 15mph, all the while salmoning up to to the front at lights because clearly they are the king of the hill, sprinter jersey and ace all rolled into one. That and Boris Bikes out the wazoo...

Sure, makes a change from boris bicunts using them as dodgems, but 'kin 'ell, geta grip and lose that death wish!
>> No. 14575 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 10:51 pm
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>>14570

https://www.youtube.com/v/gYuoOazvbyM
>> No. 14576 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 11:38 pm
14576 spacer
Morrison's 'reduced' stickers that say 25p or similar, but scan through at full price. No doubt enough people don't notice to make it worth their while, because this happens every fucking time.
>> No. 14577 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 11:48 pm
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>>14576

Maybe, if you're clumsy enough to scan the items bar code and not the bar code of the reduced sticker... then yes, that happens.

As a connoisseur of the reduced section, I know a thing or two about reduced labels. If it says 25p, it is 25p. The machine prints the bar code for the reduced price. There is no fiddling to be done.

Be sure to be more careful in future and report back with results, as I've never had this problem in all the years I've supermarket hopped in the evening to get good deals.
>> No. 14578 Anonymous
29th April 2014
Tuesday 11:55 pm
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>>14577
In Morrisons you sometimes find the staff haven't applied the yellow sticker properly. Before now I've had multiple items there with reductions where the price sticker has been applied but the part with the barcode has not. Cue frantic gesturing toward the attendant.
>> No. 14579 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:03 am
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>>14577
Oh, cock off. Do you think I'd stoop to scan the things myself?
>> No. 14580 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:05 am
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>>14558
I'm offended and I'm going to write a tumblr post discussing this.
>> No. 14581 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:06 am
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>>14578
Oh, and while we're at it, Morrisons. Morrisons. The business founded by one William Morrison. Where's the apostrophe?
>> No. 14582 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:15 am
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>>14580

I'm going to write an opinion piece in the Guardian about how it's the fault of men and Tories.
>> No. 14583 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:26 am
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>>14582
Then I will rant about it on youtube and bleat on about how no one is checking their privilege. Also that you are a part of rape culture if you don't support my kickstarter project of making a documentary about male-centric rape culture and femqueer, transfat shaming.
>> No. 14584 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:46 am
14584 This post is silly stop getting angry.
>>14583

Women are better than men and everyone knows it.

[spoiler]The only thing men are good at is remember more successful men so they can claim that men aren't shit.
>> No. 14585 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:51 am
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>>14584

The cocking up of that spoiler is just more evidence of how awful men are.
>> No. 14586 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:57 am
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>>14584

>The only thing men are good at is remember more successful men so they can claim that men aren't shit.

What is this even supposed to say? My brain is melting trying to understand it.
>> No. 14587 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 12:58 am
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>>14586

*remembering.

See, look how thick we are, Anon.
>> No. 14588 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 2:07 am
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Kids being brought up on tablets and mobile phones

I'm probably a huge hypocrite as I was brought up on TV, video games and the internet but there's something off-putting about the next generation thinking that to play a video game properly you have to pay for microtransactions. I also say this as I remember going to the arcade and spending all my pocket money there.
>> No. 14589 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 5:45 pm
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>>14588
I read 'tablets' as some kind of Ritalin scaremongering and as an ADHD sufferer was about to have a go at you.
>> No. 14590 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 5:52 pm
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>>14588

Every few weeks, I have a brief moment of existential terror when using my tablet, when I suddenly realise "shitting hell, I'm living in the future". This mundane bit of technology that I got as a free gift in a conference goodiebag was the stuff of science fiction when I was young. I occasionally have the same reaction when I see someone using an electronic cigarette, the concept just seems so fantastical and strange.
>> No. 14592 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 6:18 pm
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>>14590

Yesterday I realised my phone is faster and more useful than my first three PC's. I realised that, paired with bluetooth keyboard, it is far more powerful than the machines I was wowed with as a kid in ICT. As a word processor alone, it is astronomically ahead of the 286 I was amazed by years before.

Obviously I already knew this, but it crystallised yesterday in a way that bowled me over. I also have a raspberry pi sitting next to me at the moment, and it's making me feel dizzy.

Also, you got a tablet in a goodiebag? Nice one Hollywood.
>> No. 14593 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 6:28 pm
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>>14590
Vaporisers do certainly look like they're straight out of Blade Runner.
>> No. 14594 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 7:00 pm
14594 spacer
>14592>>14590

I'm the lad in the /g/ thread with the new Moto G - stepping up from my faithful Nokia 3510i (2002-2014 RIP), it's like taking a caveman's bow and arrow and giving him a laser-guided missile system.
>> No. 14595 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 7:06 pm
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>>14593

They look like Sonic Screwdrivers.
>> No. 14596 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 7:30 pm
14596 spacer
>>14592
Someone I know recently lamented that they were unable to leverage the immense power in their phone to boost the performance of their laptop.
>> No. 14597 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 7:47 pm
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>>14596

For the price of a compatible SD/USB flash drive of... lets say 4gb, they could use Window's own "ReadyBoost" to increase processing speed.
>> No. 14598 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 7:49 pm
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>>14597

Readyboost just uses the flash drive as a disk cache. Unless you have a really high-performance SD card (e.g. Sandisk Extreme Pro) you'd hardly notice the difference over a reasonably fast hard drive and wouldn't see any performance increase over an SSD.
>> No. 14599 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 7:57 pm
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>>14598

Any USB 3.0 stick would do it, surely?

USB sticks don't have the same Class reference system that SD cards use, do they?
>> No. 14600 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 8:05 pm
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Had a lovely chat with an artsy photography lady today, but now I can't find her on Facebook. Wish I'd asked for her number. I am an arse.
>> No. 14601 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 8:06 pm
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>>14599

Most USB drives are really quite slow, because the flash memory is specced for price and capacity rather than performance. They're still flash, so you get slightly better performance than a hard drive for small random reads and writes, but they're nowhere near in the same league as a decent SSD.

A reasonably fast USB 3.0 flash drive will do sustained reads at about 60MB/s, which is comparable to a typical modern hard drive and about 5x slower than a good SSD.
>> No. 14602 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 8:12 pm
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>>14600
I'm fawning over one on a dating site. She is perfect... Only thing is that I haven't messaged her, and I know she won't reply. Sage for emo shite.
>> No. 14603 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 8:35 pm
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>>14602

Only way I've ever got replies on a dating site. Is by shotgunning a bunch of generic messages and a large group of women. I don't think I've ever had a reply to a message I've actually sat down and thought about. Which is a shame because women generally don't like when you take the shotgun approach to on-line dating, and I would definitely prefer not to do it .
>> No. 14604 Anonymous
30th April 2014
Wednesday 9:12 pm
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>>14603
Ugh, thought about this too.

I think the main issue is pictures. I've done my research and found out that the idea one is where; 1) You're outside 2) You look like you're having fun and 3) Optional, handling a small animal.

And of course it helps immensely if you're attractive and showing a bit of flesh.

I can't stand profile pictures so I opted for the usual webcam one, which in fairness turned out ok, but it did make my face look a little fat...
>> No. 14606 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 12:39 am
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My coworker asked me to feel her arse today because she's 'proud of it'. It was fantastic. That's all well and good but she's a lezzer, and now I just have to have an angry, disappointed wank.
>> No. 14607 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 1:19 am
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>>14604
A bit of flesh, but keep your shirt on. Hint, don't show. Think three buttons undone, not topless. Unless you're on a meat market like tindr or PoF, in which case go nuts.

Other than that, shotgunning and effort have roughly the same effort-to-response ratio which is slightly disheartening, but then it's humans we're talking about. It's hard to tell the difference between "took an interest" and "creepy stalker" in a few lines of text.
>> No. 14608 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 1:25 am
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>>14607
To be fair, I'm also as superficial as the lasses. I see one that's a bit fat, and/or aesthetically challenged, and I just avoid.

Out of curiosity, what do you write in a "shot-gun" message?
>> No. 14609 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 1:30 am
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>>14608
"Let's get married tonight or I'll blow your brains out."
>> No. 14610 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 1:44 am
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>>14608
Something fairly generic, basically:
"Hey there,

I read your profile and I think we've got a few things in common, would you like to meet for coffee sometime next week?

--Me"

It's as shit as it sounds, but it beats any of the built-in "wink", "nudge" or whatever mechanisms on dating sites.
>> No. 14611 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 3:07 am
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Ugh, just fucking ugh.

So for the last two days I've been like "why's my laptop running so slow?" I did a bunch of scans, asked my dad about it, made sure everything was up to date, and it was apparently fine, just running like crap. But just now I go to change the screen brightness and lo and behold it's been on "power saver" ever since I took it to the library on Monday.

If, and he probably won't, but if my dad asks you about this, just tell I sorted it and nothing else, right?
>> No. 14612 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 5:34 am
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Laptop LEDs.

I can't turn my laptop off at the moment, because I fried the old hard drive and had to stick a new one in and put linux on it, and a side effect of all this is- bizarrely- that I have to do a static reboot every time I turn the laptop off. This means I have to leave the thing in Suspend whilst I go to sleep.

The amount of light the thing puts out when it's sleeping- Jesus Christ. I have to stack shit up around it in an elaborate manner to be able to get some shut eye. My old laptop was worse; the power button used to produce this pulsing blue light, and you just can't sleep through that shit.

Why do they feel the need to build laptops that could put a rave to shame, even when they're asleep? It doesn't add functionality. I could understand it when it's on, but what's the point when it's effectively off?
>> No. 14613 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 5:36 am
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>>14612

It's a laptop. Put it in another room or the closet.
>> No. 14614 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 9:21 am
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>>14609>>14610

I see, I've been well over-cooking it then.
>> No. 14615 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 9:24 am
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>>14612

Black electrical tape over the LED.

Had the same issue with my smoke detector - the fools that designed the room didn't have a person sleeping in mind, so it's directly above my head and it glows green and blinks red every minute or so. A really effective means of torture.
>> No. 14616 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 9:48 am
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>>14612
A small, cover-up-able LED is keeping you awake? Let me cry you a little tear. This window and light is directly above the bed, which is attached to the wall. The curtains hang down onto the bed so if I move at all during the night I'll hit them and they'll part slightly and I get a beam of orange light in my face.
>> No. 14617 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 11:14 am
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>>14616
Bit of black electrical tape over the floodlight should fix that one.
>> No. 14618 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 1:45 pm
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I get so used to not eating for days that when I finally go to the shop and buy food even eating a bowl of muesli hits my stomach like a freight train and I'm left feeling violently sick and all too aware of how silly I am.

My tummy hurts.
>> No. 14619 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 2:37 pm
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>>14618

Muesli is actually quite tough on the gut, all fibers, sugar and dairy (if you use milk). I'd recommend trying some oats, eggs, toast or crackers for a first meal.
>> No. 14620 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 4:09 pm
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>>14588
Pike the games I know how you feel mate. What about the effects on eyesight?
>> No. 14621 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 4:53 pm
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>>14616
Turn it off if it's your house or complain to the neighbours that it's keeping you up.
>> No. 14622 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 5:26 pm
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>>14621
>Turn it off if it's your house

Your critical thinking skills never quite developed, did they?
>> No. 14623 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 8:25 pm
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>>14622
It's .gs, I never assume that people are capable of acting logically until proven otherwise.

He could share the house and feel unable to change anything outside his room because of autistic fears.
>> No. 14624 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 8:42 pm
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>>14623
How would your advice help in that case?
>> No. 14625 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 9:04 pm
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>>14624
By making him feel like a numpty for not facing his fears?
>> No. 14626 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 9:06 pm
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>>14625
So it wouldn't help, you were just trying to make him feel bad?
>> No. 14627 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 9:47 pm
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>>14626
Feeling like a numpty is the first step to effecting change.

I feel like numpty is an underused word, it conveys the message of being an idiot in a patronising but less strong way that calling them a retard or something.
>> No. 14628 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 9:51 pm
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>>14627
Ah, you're a graduate of the Rube Goldberg School of Being Helpful. Did you study in the Chaos Theory block?
>> No. 14629 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 10:20 pm
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>>14619
Sainsbury's often has almond (Alpro) or oat (Oatly) milk on offer for about a £1/litre. Get the cheapest porridge you can get (worst case you'll have to chew your porridge) and you have a mostly allergen free (except for gluten), really quite nice breakfast.
>> No. 14630 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 10:54 pm
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>>14629
Selling milk by the litre instead of the pint? ARE NIGE is right, time to cut the ties with europe.
>> No. 14631 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 10:59 pm
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>>14630
In all honesty, imperial units need to die.
>> No. 14632 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 11:00 pm
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>>14631
Why?
>> No. 14633 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 11:20 pm
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>>14632
Because buying milk by the pint is an impediment to science and to progress, and a tool by which cynical retail giants can rip off consumers who can't make a rational decision when faced with multiple unit systems.
>> No. 14634 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 11:25 pm
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>>14633
It's not like it has '568ml' written on the side or anything.
>> No. 14635 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 11:31 pm
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>>14632
It's stupid and obtuse and slowing our progress down as a species.

Amerifarts still use it, and it's a logical clusterfuck.
>> No. 14636 Anonymous
1st May 2014
Thursday 11:42 pm
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>>14633
2 litres is less than 4 pints so if anything switching to litres is ripping you off with less for the same price.

Usually I'm in favour of metric units but pints are a good standard to keep for drinks. Ordering a pint makes it clear how much you want and is both easier than saying '568ml of Bishop's Finger' and less ambiguous than asking for a 'large Bishop's Finger'. I'll admit it's perhaps less important for milk but seeing as most glasses are made in half-pint or pint sizes having a 1/2/4 pint bottle fills glasses an integer number of times with no half-full glasses.
>> No. 14637 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 12:05 am
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>>14636

Is "a half litre of Wafty Cranker" really any harder to say than "a pint of Old Calibration"?
>> No. 14638 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 12:07 am
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>>14637
It's 300% of the syllables. And 68ml less beer.
>> No. 14639 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 12:16 am
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Metric units are a godsend in the lab and for any calculation that requires a reasonable degree of precision. However for things where precision isn't as necessary I don't see any benefit.

You don't order a pint because you want 568ml exactly, you order it because it's the standard unit you are used to and what glasses are designed to hold. I'm not saying it's alright for places to rip you off by giving you less than a full pint because that's what you've paid for and what you expect as a minimum. What I'm saying is that we only expect 568ml because it's standard.

Changing the standard to say half a litre has no benefit as there is no gain in precision, but it causes a lot of things (glass sizes, ordering habits, pint culture etc.) to change for no good reason. Granted these aren't exactly huge costs but when you are comparing negligible cost with 0 benefit the cost still wins out.

Ordering in ml makes sense in countries where 7%+ beers are more common than over here because you don't necessarily want a full pint but a half can be a little small. Here though beer strengths are mostly scattered around the 4-5% mark reflecting (or maybe causing) the pint drinking culture.
>> No. 14640 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 12:34 am
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>>14638

You're assuming they would charge as much for a half-litre as they would for a pint.
>> No. 14641 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 1:01 am
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Ah lads... house hunting is doing my head in.

We kept receiving these stupid booklets from the uni telling us to "wait" and take our time.

Bollox to that, every house I want to live in is now taken, and I'll be forced to look for something far away from work/gym/shops. The last thing I want is to share a house with 6 other LADS or lasses with their banter, I'm far beyond those years.

/whinge
>> No. 14642 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 1:40 am
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>>14641
Do you have a group of people to live with already, or will you join an already existing group? Because I did the latter this year, and it has been a horrid experience.
>> No. 14643 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 2:09 am
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>>14642
I had the same problem this year and it was just because I had refused to look into it before Christmas. The biggest lesson I learnt though was to have a look at the actual room they are assigning you because its a schoolboy error that has me living in a cardboard box.

Anyway to make this a bit fun I propose that Letting Agents should perform a sort of test perspective which tenants have to complete before they get a room and their results will assign them a particular property -much like the hat in Harry Potter.

Example:
>Its the pre-drinking before you and your mates go out, which music selection do you think will work a treat to get everyone into the party mood?

A) Greatest hits of the 80s, 90s and early 2000
B) The latest chart music played at a volume that makes conversation difficult
C) Obscure electronic music that nobody has ever heard before

A) Old Farts fun house
B) They can piss off
C) Stoner Manor (comes with pre-installed socks over the fire alarms)

>> No. 14644 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 2:22 am
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>>14643
Problem with my house is that the two people who lived here already are very different from me, and we were all very different from the other guy who moved in. The two guys living here already are very devout Christians, and they host bible study dinner parties every week, and there are bible quotes on the walls and stuff. The other guy was, for want of a better word, a chav. He'd have people around a couple of nights a week, playing loud dance music like Cascada until 5AM. The garden would always be full of tab ends and empty beer cans. All his low class mates would rub out the bible quotes on a whiteboard in the hallway, and write lewd things. When I went home for Christmas, I came back and found that my room was trashed, obviously by one of his mates who I believe he allowed to stay in my bedroom. He ended up getting kicked out thankfully, now we have an exchange student living in his room who keeps himself to himself, but the shower drains are constantly clogged with his hair which is unpleasant. I'm a massive autistic shut in and lock myself in my room, so arguably I'm the worst of the lot. Less than two months left, can't wait to leave.
>> No. 14645 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 9:11 am
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>>14642

I have neither really - I had a work friend who was/is interested, but her interest seems lukewarm. She kept mentioning that she'd happily be apart of my group, if I find something suitable. It almost seems as if I'm supposed to do the leg-work, and most likely will fuck off when things don't go to plan.

>>14644
Ugh... This is really not good, I don't want to have to think about having my stuff messed up or stolen.


I partly blame myself for not starting earlier, but as I remember January to April were unbelievably busy periods at work. I also partly blame the shitty uni housing advice office, they make it seem like it's all rainbows and a laugh when looking for a place. Puerile knobs.
>> No. 14646 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 10:22 am
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My housemates have just abandoned me to go and live with someone else, so I have to find somewhere else to live next year. Cunts. They tried to play it off as though they gave a shit as well, the tits.

Anyway, I'm quite open to meeting new people. Everyone seems to be really anal about housemates, you guys and everyone I know in real life. I don't get it, I really don't care, so long as they don't come into my room when I'm not in it I couldn't give a fig about how many yoghurt pots they've pissed in without licking the lid or whatever. Anyway, I wouldn't mind meeting some new people, my social life has ground to a halt this year because of aforementioned cunts being cunts, so it'd be nice to get that back on track again.
>> No. 14647 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 1:27 pm
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German keyboards piss me off a bit, it's not the fact that z and y are switcher or that I need both hands to make an @ or the extra useless üöäµß symbols that I only ever use when illustrating that I don't use them.

What pisses me off about German keyboards is how the caps lock affects numbers as well as letters. It is such a German thing to do. Idiots.
>> No. 14648 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 1:38 pm
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>>14647
It makes it a hell of a lot easier to ^&)£%(, you must admit.
>> No. 14649 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 5:03 pm
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Sour_milk_sea_US[1].jpg
146491464914649
Our office recycling is collected about once a fortnight, which means that the kitchen regularly stinks of rancid milk from the poorly-rinsed bottles.

I don't even take milk in my tea. Milk is for babies.
>> No. 14650 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 8:11 pm
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pissboil.png
146501465014650
This isn't really random but I don't think it warrants its own thread but what REALLY pisses me off is when people continue stacking baskets in a supermarket when there is CLEARLY something stopping them from stacking directly up. Not only is this potentially dangerous, it's just plain lazy. When you realise that your basket is the first that doesn't stack directly up then you fix the problem, not just leave it, and then everyone else that follows just stacks on top of that -- is it REALLY that fucking hard to move a single basket? I can somewhat get it when there's like 20 baskets, it can weight a good few kg and a lot of people can't lift that -- but it should never get that way in the first place. What if they fall over and hurt a kid, just because you couldn't be arsed to re-seat a basket, something that takes LITERALLY SECONDS? Are you really in that much a rush to escape Lidl and carry on with your pathetic life? Jesus wept.
>> No. 14651 Anonymous
2nd May 2014
Friday 8:13 pm
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switcher.png
146511465114651
>>14647
If it's your personal computer you can change the layout to the proper one, you know...
>> No. 14652 Anonymous
3rd May 2014
Saturday 11:32 am
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Might be me being an arse, but I fucking hate this fixation that all the billy big bollocks/johnny ten men in ARE COUNTREY have with owning a hideous pitbull type dog. There's no redeeming quality to them - they're quite vicious by nature and as ugly as sin. I suppose they would be generally better if they weren't owned by some tegger on a sink estate who doesn't know a thing about how to raise a dog without brutalising it.
Alas, they are by and large horrid little things as is particular to their breed and the upbringing most of them apparently endure.
>> No. 14653 Anonymous
3rd May 2014
Saturday 12:19 pm
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>>14652
Agree - despite what they say across the pond, pitbulls are largely seen as fighting dog and will be used for just that. Hard to believe anyone without broken teeth and forearm tattoos would choose it over a more docile pooch.
>> No. 14664 Anonymous
4th May 2014
Sunday 10:49 pm
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>>14650
I see it in Waitrose. If it's 10 baskets or fewer, I fix it because I'm not really doing anything else except waiting in line while the person at the front engages in mindless chatter with the clerk.

The people behind are shocked and amazed by my action, and engage in tribal dance and song.
>> No. 14667 Anonymous
5th May 2014
Monday 10:43 pm
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Gmail has really pissed me off by mucking about with the font size on a bunch of important job application emails. Despite showing a uniform sensible font size in the message editor, viewing the messages under 'sent items' shows a sudden jump in size halfway through for no fucking reason. Outlook never gave me this shit.
>> No. 14668 Anonymous
5th May 2014
Monday 10:50 pm
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>>14667
Have you examined the message source to see whether it's just a display bug or whether your messages were actually sent mangled?
>> No. 14669 Anonymous
5th May 2014
Monday 10:51 pm
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>>14667
Why are you pissing about with font sizes in an email?
>> No. 14670 Anonymous
5th May 2014
Monday 11:19 pm
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>>14669

Not him but copy-pasted text can often end up as foully formatted HTML in a lot of mail clients.
>> No. 14671 Anonymous
6th May 2014
Tuesday 12:05 am
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>>14670
Only if you've been silly enough not to set it to send plain text instead of cancer HTML. At work they've hard-wired the default to AIDS "Rich Text" and I have to set it manually each time. Cunts.
>> No. 14673 Anonymous
6th May 2014
Tuesday 11:34 am
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>>14671
The real oversight in SMTP is that there isn't a header specifying the sender's connection speed. If there were I could bounce any message sent from something faster than 14.4k baud.
>> No. 14675 Anonymous
6th May 2014
Tuesday 12:19 pm
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>>14669
I wasn't deliberately, I copied a line from an old cover letter explaining who I am and what I'm studying etc. Showed the same size in the editor but then it jumps when I view the sent message.

Fuck's sake if I'm sending out 10 applications a day I haven't exactly got time to type each one from scratch. Gmail sort it out.
>> No. 14676 Anonymous
6th May 2014
Tuesday 12:51 pm
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People who spell their children's names wrong.
>> No. 14685 Anonymous
7th May 2014
Wednesday 11:00 pm
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>>14676
And get them tattooed so they don't forget how to spell them? In fact, all people who have "names" tattooed, aren't memories enough?
>> No. 14686 Anonymous
7th May 2014
Wednesday 11:03 pm
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>>14685
You're missing the point if you think it's to help them remember the name.
>> No. 14687 Anonymous
7th May 2014
Wednesday 11:05 pm
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>>14676
Teacher at my school had a baby girl, called her Charleee. Like the shortened form of Charlotte, but with three e's. That is her legal name. Fucking awful.
>> No. 14688 Anonymous
7th May 2014
Wednesday 11:54 pm
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>>14687
I always struggle with names like that, fucks with my tinnitus.
>> No. 14689 Anonymous
7th May 2014
Wednesday 11:54 pm
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>>14687
>Teacher

Fuck me, broken Britain innit?
>> No. 14690 Anonymous
7th May 2014
Wednesday 11:56 pm
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>>14687

She does realise that for her entire life that kid's going to have people shouting "Charleeeeee!" at her?
>> No. 14691 Anonymous
8th May 2014
Thursday 12:12 am
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>>14690

Yeah, I'm seeing a deed poll in that kids future.
>> No. 14693 Anonymous
8th May 2014
Thursday 8:27 am
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>>14691
I can hear the laser tattoo removal place near me's owner rubbing his hands with glee.
>> No. 14695 Anonymous
8th May 2014
Thursday 9:12 am
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>>14693

This is what dismays me.

Tattoos were always considered a permanent statement on your body. You made a mark on your body that could not be removed, so anything stupid would stay as a reminder.

Now every moron, left and right is getting a shit tattoo on them, with this laser removal in mind. It's cheating, it's stupid and impulsive.

Don't get me started on women's wrist tattoos...
>> No. 14709 Anonymous
8th May 2014
Thursday 11:57 am
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>>14695
I thought laser removal was imperfect. Don't you end up with scarring or something?
>> No. 14726 Anonymous
8th May 2014
Thursday 4:26 pm
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People who start threads without including a link to the appropriate background material (e.g. news link, easily available video).
>> No. 14742 Anonymous
8th May 2014
Thursday 7:40 pm
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>>14709
Scarring is created when you acquire the tattoo - puncturing the skin multiple times with a needle will obviously leave a surface wound. After laser treatment all that happens is the ink molecules sitting under the skin are burst (for want of a better layman's explanation) and the scarring created when you punctured the skin multiple times with a needle becomes visible, because the ink sitting behind the scar is gone. And all people scar differently, so that is what determines whether you form visible scar tissue when you get tattooed - this is why some people who undergo laser treatment have very visible scarring and others have very little. I hope that makes sense.

>>14695
People used to say this about marriage as well. Although I suppose a tattoo won't beat you and your kids bloody for burning the Sunday roast.
>> No. 14869 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 1:54 pm
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Got back with a girl who originally left me. She said she can't live without me and if she had to she'd most likely die alone.

The effort sheis making is kinda like the end of the relationship again.


Not sure why I bother but I'm a massive pussy and hate the thought of anybody else haivng her
>> No. 14871 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 2:08 pm
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>>14869
Describe her.
>> No. 14873 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 2:45 pm
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>>14871

Fat. That is why she is back.
>> No. 14874 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 2:53 pm
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>>14873
Case closed.
>> No. 14881 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 4:08 pm
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Whenever Netflix removes the "Recently Added" section so I have to look up elsewhere what has been added recently.

Also removing the number list which was convenient for knowing when I reached the end of list. It's helpful as the other categories have duplicate movies/shows.

It's a very 1st world problem.
>> No. 14882 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 4:14 pm
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When people describe the everyday annoyances of normal people in developed nations as "first world problems". (We've had this before I think.)
>> No. 14883 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 4:16 pm
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Hello, is that Mr Anonymous?
Who's calling?
My name's Peter Johnson.
What organisation are you calling from?
I'm from ABC Solutions.
I'm not interested in buying windows.
[Seemingly genuine offence] How rude! *hangs up*

I didn't realise good manners extended to humouring repeated attempts at selling you something you don't want. Thanks for the good laugh Peter, if you didn't hear me laughing in your face before you put the phone down.
>> No. 14884 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 4:17 pm
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>>14882
To be fair I was attempting to cover my arse because I know if I didn't end that post with "1st world problems" then someone else would have another cuntoff about the whole thing.
>> No. 14886 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 5:37 pm
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>>14882
>When people describe the everyday annoyances of normal people in developed nations as "first world problems"
Something's very wrong with you if you think issues with the layout of Netflix is an "everyday annoyance of normal people". The fact that they're not "everyday annoyances of normal people" is why they're called "first world problems".
>> No. 14887 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 5:46 pm
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>>14886
I don't think that, not in the strict sense you're suggesting I might. A first world problem is exactly that though. We're annoyed by trivial things that people in poor countries don't have the chance to encounter, because at the very least they have to make do with very little material wealth or worse, have to contend with real poverty related suffering. I reject the suggestion we're supposed to appreciate that fact every time we become mildly annoyed.
>> No. 14890 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:11 pm
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>>14887
>We're annoyed by trivial things that people in poor countries don't have the chance to encounter, because at the very least they have to make do with very little material wealth or worse, have to contend with real poverty related suffering.
Wrong. Complaining about people calling you out on that is justified, because if they're calling that a "first world problem" they are doing it wrong.
>> No. 14891 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:15 pm
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>>14890
If you're the expert (you're not), why don't you say what's right rather than offering up only tedious contradiction with zero reasoning?
>> No. 14892 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:18 pm
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>>14891
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=first+world+problems
>> No. 14894 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:20 pm
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>>14892
Everything I read backs up what I said.
>> No. 14895 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:27 pm
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Minor grievances and irritants are pervasive problems in people's lives, no matter how significant they may be compared to others problems.
>> No. 14896 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:29 pm
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I always thought a first world problem was a problem that can only exist because of our excessive way of living. Something like "I have to pause my netflix when I go for a poo because my iPad doesn't get wifi in the bathroom"

Sage for needless post.
>> No. 14897 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:33 pm
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>>14894
Really? My first page is full of things that make it clear that they're not "everyday annoyances of normal people". They're things like "my connection is so fast I can't play Snake with the Youtube loading screen", or "phone signal at work is so poor I can't access Facebook on the bog". They're things that are so utterly trivial that they demonstrate a lack of perspective. Not so much "my Internet has been down all day" as "my Internet has been down for two whole minutes". Similarly compare "that game that should have arrived this week didn't turn up" with "that game I ordered for release day won't arrive until tomorrow".
>> No. 14898 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 6:35 pm
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>>14896
That's exactly the sort of thing.
>> No. 14899 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 7:05 pm
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>>14896
That's what I thought too.

I'm confused at to what people are disagreeing/moaning about here. The whole #firstworldproblems thing to me just shows some self-awareness that your problems aren't big in the grand scheme of things, but annoying enough to warrant some moaning. Are people getting annoyed about that in itself or people who use it incorrectly?
>> No. 14900 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 7:11 pm
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>>14899
Some people have a nasty habit of misunderstanding it as more generally "problems in the first world" or "any problem not faced by starving Africans".
>> No. 14901 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 7:12 pm
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>>14897
I think maybe you're fixated on my use of the word 'everyday'. I, apparently unlike you, think it entirely reasonable to describe all but the first of your examples as "everyday annoyances of normal people". I'm not saying that a first world problem must happen every day for it to qualify. I'm saying that these are the types of trivial problem you expect to run into very regularly.

http://www.tumblr.com/search/first+world+problems
http://www.reddit.com/r/firstworldproblems/
http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/first-world-problems

>I can't watch Netflix on my laptop with the inflight WiFi because my polarized Ray Bans are distorting the screen.
This is clearly an example you would consider valid and I don't disagree. But that's at one end of a spectrum.

>I need to blow my nose and all I have are those scratchy brown paper towels.
>I needed to take a dump AFTER the shower.
Everyday annoyances of normal people. Understand that I didn't set out to provide a canonical definition of the phrase, but to defend myself from your attack. Somebody might blow these issues out of proportion or go too far out of their way to complain, but I don't think the criticism that calls for is to exclaim "FWP". You'll see from the KYM page it does carry the connotations I detailed in >>14887. Honestly I doubt we disagree to a huge extent and I think it was your reading my post through an uncharitable lens that lead us here.

I thought I'd outgrown my need to argue on the internet at length over the most inane shit imaginable.
>> No. 14902 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 8:33 pm
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After deciding what to watch on netflix, the movie I am watching has no subtitles.

I've heard that streaming services don't enforce subtitles because it would mean movie/tv companies would be reluctant to license their movies/shows to streaming services due to the extra bit of work. Possibly bollocks but it does annoy me that they won't add something which is bare minimum on a DVD.
>> No. 14903 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 10:35 pm
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>>14902
Why do you want subtitles for? They just take your attention away from the action. Unless it's in a foreign language where it's kind of necessary.
>> No. 14904 Anonymous
9th May 2014
Friday 10:42 pm
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>>14903
Partially deaf
I'm doing my neighbours a favour by not turning up the volume too high.
>> No. 14923 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 4:12 pm
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People who press the button at a traffic crossing despite it being lit up and they can clearly see you press it on the other side

DO YOU NOT TRUST ME TO OPERATE A BUTTON?
>> No. 14924 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 4:36 pm
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>>14904
Write to them, tell them you expect subtitles as a disabled paying customer and will consider cancelling your subscription or complaining to some kind of ombudsman if you don't get them.
>> No. 14925 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 4:46 pm
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>>14923

Have you checked to make sure you are capable of operating the button? If someone on the other side is always pressing it too, then perhaps you aren't to be trusted.
>> No. 14929 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 5:02 pm
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People who do that fake throwing up/gagging sound. That's always 15 times more disgusting than the thing you're signaling to, so stop it, or I will shove my hand down past your larynx and poke around until you're actually sick all over yourself.
>> No. 14930 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 5:03 pm
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>>14923
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-23869955
>> No. 14931 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 5:47 pm
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>>14923
I hate people who press the button even though they can see there is a massive gap in traffic coming up during which they can cross, and then do so anyway. Never mind that their impatience has held up the journeys of about ten other people in their cars.
>> No. 14934 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 6:11 pm
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Office types who lose their manners at train stations. Try barging past me and I'll discreetly trip you up so you fall under a departing train.
>> No. 14940 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 7:26 pm
14940 spacer
>>14931
people who walk slow and take all or the middle of the pavement.

same slow people at a crossing who take up too much pavement preventing you from crossing when you see a gap in traffic.

People who do not use their indicators on a crossroads until they make the turn.

Old people using public transport during the rush hour.

Today I had a new thing to rant about. I got the bus to work today and 3 pissed 14 year olds got on, didn't pay their fare, were being an annoyance, were drinking bottles of beer at 9 fucking AM and then got off after the bus driver told them to fuck off. People who waste other people's time
>> No. 14943 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 7:41 pm
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Non-British Citizens who enter Britain's Got Talent
Myself for watching for this utter rubbish.
>> No. 14945 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 8:35 pm
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>>14931
This is one of many reasons I'd like to see something like a stop-and-proceed rule for red lights. Some idiot thought it would be a good idea to put them at a busy motorway junction near me, but neglected to make them part-time, so now they cycle pointlessly at 2am when it could just function as a normal roundabout.
>> No. 14946 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 8:48 pm
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>Today I had a new thing to rant about. I got the bus to work today and 3 pissed 14 year olds got on, didn't pay their fare, were being an annoyance, were drinking bottles of beer at 9 fucking AM and then got off after the bus driver told them to fuck off. People who waste other people's time

Reminds me of a bus journey in Manchester.Was about 9pm on a Saturday night, most passengers dressed up heading into the centre. Bus stopped at an unlit Longsight arm out. Flappy bus door opened. About 3 lads got on the bus thinking they were the next generation of bad boys with shooters, hoods up, demanding respect from the driver cos they didn't want to pay their £1.50 fare each. Driver just sat in his cage, probably intimidated by these cocky just like Jezza I don't say the N word carbuncles to society.

Turned into a standoff, which with bus drivers, usually means turning off the engine and being quiet untill the miscreant gets off / shoots everyone / detonates their bomb rucksack / everyone tuts and looks at their watches.

'GET OFF THE BUS YOU CUNT' a voice ordered from about 5 seats behind me. I think this cocky N word hadn't seen Withnail and I.

'Who said that' said N word man, trying to look hard and cocky whilst scanning the passengers trying to find a reply in their scared eyes. Driver probably thought 'yes, he's found another person to argue with / kill'.

'I DID'. I looked over my shoulder to see the epithet of brick shithouses rise up from his seat and walk towards the N word man like a fucking terminator on electronic steroids. He was about 6 foot 5, leather and denim, 18 stone with a don't fuck with me traveller accent. I think the bus wobbled as he made his way to the front.

Now the thing was, cocky N word lad had a dilemma. Does he run off scared with his tail between his legs to be spanked by a gat by his 50p gangstas, or stand his ground. He should have taken the former, his crew already hiding behind a lamp post.

Ever heard someone say 'kicked off the bus'? Cocky N word lad was full nuclear arsenalled off the bus. Terminator Paddy (I met him afterwards and he said his name was Patrick and he lived in Ireland - J.Clarkson) stomped backed to his seat muttering ' feckin wastin me drinkin time'.
>> No. 14947 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 8:50 pm
14947 spacer
>>14931
I do this to punish people for driving cars.
>> No. 14948 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 8:50 pm
14948 spacer
>>14946
What
>> No. 14949 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 8:51 pm
14949 spacer
>>14946
Wait, there are parts of this country that still charge children to ride the bus? Strewth, it really is grim up north.
>> No. 14952 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 9:15 pm
14952 spacer
>>14946
Haha, great story mate! "Terminator Paddy"... What a legend!
>> No. 14954 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 9:29 pm
14954 spacer
>>14946
https://www.youtube.com/v/tkht4ETbP2o

This is strikingly similar.
>> No. 14961 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 10:00 pm
14961 spacer
>>14954
I've watched this about 10 times over the years. I still don't know what they're arguing about.
>> No. 14962 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 10:05 pm
14962 spacer
>>14949

Who said children?

Are you Janet Street Porter
>> No. 14963 Anonymous
10th May 2014
Saturday 10:18 pm
14963 spacer
>>14954

Pricks.
>> No. 14966 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 2:17 am
14966 spacer
When you're watching something on TV or a movie that requires attention (in this case, Breaking Bad) and the person you're watching with is on their phone barely watching. What's the point? I don't have to watch it with them having watched it before but I thought it'd be something nice to do together, something to talk about etc.

The one that really fucks me off is when they asked what happened after staring at bloody Facebook (spit) instead of paying attention.
>> No. 14969 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 2:33 am
14969 spacer
>>14966
Oh yeah that'd intensely annoying. My housemate always plays chess on his laptop or phone while watching shit,very annoying with the brightness as well.
>> No. 14971 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 2:44 am
14971 spacer
>>14966
"Stop ruining shit for me man."

Don't be passive-aggressive and stuff the toilets with toilet paper.
>> No. 14972 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 3:35 am
14972 spacer
>>14969
Maybe I could ignore it if it was like Series 2/3 but we're in the last 8 episodes ffs! So much happening right now to remember. Will not do this in the future, I'll stick to having Netflix on while I'm on my desktop instead of being somewhat social.
>> No. 14973 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 6:37 am
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When people say "the N word" instead of "nigger" and think that's perfectly fine. See >>14946 for an example. It's the malice behind the word that makes it bad, not the actual physical word. Calling someone "the cocky N word lad" is the same as calling him "the cocky nigger lad".
>> No. 14975 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 10:17 am
14975 spacer
>>14973

https://www.youtube.com/v/dF1NUposXVQ
>> No. 14976 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 11:29 am
14976 spacer
>>14973
I don't like the way it's being treated as a swearword these days. Censoring it makes it more taboo, when we should be trying to do the opposite and lessen its offensiveness. I'm sure the media only started printing 'n-word' relatively recently.
>> No. 14995 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 6:34 pm
14995 spacer
>>14973

Whatever happened to the auto an on that?
>> No. 14996 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 6:49 pm
14996 spacer
>>14995
I was wondering that too. I tripped it once when I copied and pasted something and have been careful ever since.

I'm surprised at the ban being lifted, and even more surprised at a wordfilter not being implemented.
>> No. 14997 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 6:51 pm
14997 spacer
https://www.youtube.com/v/G2zDW9me-IY

Please don't ban purpz, I won't do it again.
>> No. 15003 Anonymous
11th May 2014
Sunday 8:48 pm
15003 spacer
>>14996
>>14995

The autoban only happens on the plural form of the word.
>> No. 15007 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 12:48 am
15007 spacer
>>15003
Yes, but have you banned the African plural form?
>> No. 15011 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 10:00 am
15011 spacer
>>15003
Be careful, the word that is to do with laughing and features the "n word" is also a trigger.
>> No. 15023 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 5:37 pm
15023 spacer
Not making a new thread for this, but two days ago I had unprotected sex with a girl I only just met (on the pill) and now have a sore throat. AM I GOING TO DIE

OF AIDS??????!????
>> No. 15024 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 5:51 pm
15024 spacer
>>15023
Maybe you shouldn't have let her deepthroat you
>> No. 15025 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 5:55 pm
15025 spacer
>>15023About 30%-60% of people infected with HIV develop flu-like symptoms such as sore throat

>
>> No. 15026 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 6:06 pm
15026 spacer
>>15023
Did you eat her out ?
>> No. 15027 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 7:11 pm
15027 spacer
>>15026
Speaking of eating out (sort of), I fancied something different tonight, and first thoughts were of a bit of chinky. Unfortunately it's Monday and it turns out they're all closed.
First world problem?
>> No. 15028 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 7:12 pm
15028 spacer
>>15024

That wasn't even the wurst of it!
>> No. 15029 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 7:18 pm
15029 spacer
>>15028
Keep that up and you'll get battered.
>> No. 15030 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 7:55 pm
15030 spacer
>>15027

The quality of the food that goes into asian take-aways is just so shit and putrid that it should put you off.

Sorry for sounding like wanker Oliver, but the last take away gave me such diarrhoea that I'd never witnessed before. I've never had shit fly out of my arse so fast that it left it in a quasi-gas state and required extensive toilet bowl de-fecalment.
>> No. 15031 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 8:16 pm
15031 spacer
>>15030
White man tummy no strong, yes?
>> No. 15032 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 8:21 pm
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>>15024
>>15026
there was no oral contact, only kissing
>> No. 15033 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 8:35 pm
15033 spacer
>>15029

Is that a Scottish thing?

>>15030

I don't think Jamie Oliver has ever been quite so graphic with his bowel movements tbh.

Chinese is the best takeaway, get that.
>> No. 15034 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 8:48 pm
15034 spacer
>>15032
Just go to a sexual health clinic, I expect you just caught a cold from her though.
>> No. 15035 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 10:26 pm
15035 spacer
>>15033
There's a thyme and a plaice for food puns.
>> No. 15036 Anonymous
12th May 2014
Monday 11:52 pm
15036 spacer
>>15034
I'd agree with this so please, on the principles of safety and setting a good example to the young'uns, go get yourself tested. It's always a nice feeling to walk around knowing you definitely 100% aren't the love and cherishy way and have a squeaky clean knob.
>> No. 15051 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 10:00 pm
15051 Football.
GrossLookingPizza.jpg
150511505115051
It's just so awful on so many levels. Forget the dullness of kicking a sphere back and forth and back and forth and back and forth for the length of a feature film, the fact that it costs 800 quadrillion blood monies to host the fucking "spectacle" is mind blowing. And not in a good way, like when you wake up mid wank, or eat a Dime bar.

As someone with a primary school level understanding of both football playing and film making, I know that a match could probably be televised for about £10,000 and a few school jumpers, but of course that's not factoring in the grossly inflated wages players receive. And "working hard" is not the same as "working out", the latter of which footballers do. Those dead Turkish miners worked hard, paratroopers work hard. Pop stars and people who hate their SOs work out.

Oh, and all the fans are racists and the players all sex offenders.
>> No. 15052 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 10:01 pm
15052 spacer
>>15051
>As someone with a primary school level understanding of both football playing
You should probably have stopped at that point and deleted whatever you were writing.
>> No. 15053 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 10:25 pm
15053 spacer
>>15051
I like football as a game but the obscene wages and corruption of the premier league ruin it for me. I'll find myself watching a game if it's on down the pub but I would never deliberately sit in and watch a game (except maybe to watch England get their arses handed to them).
>> No. 15054 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 10:48 pm
15054 spacer
>>15052

Sorry, Brian Logan, I'll try to make it perfectly clear the next time I attempt humour. A Vocaroo recording where I explain the assumed impact for the following punchline? Or maybe a sign, yeah, like "beware of joke"?
>> No. 15055 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 11:03 pm
15055 spacer
>>15054
Ohhh, the sarcasm angle. Very marketable.
>> No. 15056 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 11:19 pm
15056 spacer
>>15051
What irritates me about it is of course how people go on about it - it's basically the male version of a soap opera.

There's nothing worse than coming to an office on Monday morning listening to the LADS yapping away about how Bobingo was bought for 6 trillion and how Martinez was sent off for something, and that Travers was a cunt, and there manager is got it all wrong. Utter verbal wank.

Then there's fantasy football, taking their operatic tripe to a make-believe level.
>> No. 15058 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 11:32 pm
15058 spacer
>>15056
>Firstly, imagine every time within a day that football is mentioned by someone else. Secondly, replace it with something that you don't want to hear about every day. Say... Archaeology. Then, think carefully about how an average day would pan out.

So, you awaken to the clock radio. It's 7AM. Just as you awaken, it's time for the news and archaeology already. Not news and other historical investigations, like library restorations or museum openings (unless there's another event happening), but just the news and archaelogy. Malaysian plane is still missing. Pistorius is still on trial. New dig announced in Giza. Ancient Mayan temple discovered. Exciting stuff.

Time for a bite to eat over the morning TV. More news. More archaeology. Yes, you are aware of what is up with the missing plane. Fine. Now the archaeology in video format. Video of people dusting off some skulls and bits of pottery. All well and good, but archaeology isn't your thing. It would be nice to hear about something else.

Even when it isn't archaeology season, the media follow noted archaeologists. They drive fast cars, date beautiful women, advertise fragrances, and sometimes they go to nightclubs and act in the worst possible way. Scandals erupt as the tabloids follow these new celebrities when they're not searching the past for answers. It is entirely possible you can recite the names of certain researchers, even if you don't pay attention to archaeology. You don't know what transfer season is, but you know that someone was transferred to a dig in Peru for a sum of money that could fund the London Underground for two whole days.

Out of the car at 8:55 and into work. What are the colleagues talking about, I wonder? Oh, Jones dropped a 3,890 year old pot and smashed it? What a useless wanker! Someone should do something unpleasant to him. And don't even ask about the unfortunate incident in Athens two years ago - you'll be there all day! Breaking a pillar like that! We don't talk about that here, mate. What? You don't want to discuss the finer points of the prevalence of phallic imagery in Pompeii? Is there something wrong with you?

The drive home from work. Every thirty minutes, no matter the station, someone mentions the archaeology. Best sit in silence. Drive past a huge billboard with a black and white picture of a rakishly handsome archaeologist draped over an impossibly beautiful woman. He's winking at you. Trowel in his left hand, supermodel in the right. Jurassic, by Calvin Klein.

And now the pub. A nice pub with a beer garden. Posters in the windows. LIVE EXCAVATION AT THE VALLEY OF THE KINGS! All of it on a huge TV with the volume up too loud. Drunken people yelling at the screen. "SEND IT FOR CARBON DATING, YOU USELESS COCK!" "WHAT ARE YOU ON, MATE? DUST THE ANCIENT MEDALLION GENTLY! SMELTING METHODS OF THE TIME PRODUCED VERY SOFT AND IMPURE METALS EASILY PRONE TO DISFIGURATION!" All this from two men out of a crowd of twenty. One lousy drunken idiot and his chum ruin the image of other archaeology fans. Carbon dating report from the lab updates on TV, read by a man employed because they've been following the beautiful science since they were a boy. The drunk chimes in again. "WHAT PHARAOH'S REIGN DID YOU SAY? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS SAYS ABOUT THE UNDERPINNINGS OF OUR THEORY OF AGRICULTURAL DEVELOPMENT OF 4TH BC EGYPT? GET IN, MATE!" A cheer cascades through the building and you can only wonder why.

Best go home and avoid anyone who might be drinking and singing. You once met a disagreeable chap who threatened to beat you up because you didn't watch the archaeology. "Not a late paleolithic era supporter are you? Think you're better than me? I'll have you, you scrawny twat!"

To bed. To repeat the cycle tomorrow. The inescapable, inevitability that wherever you go, someone, somewhere, is just dying to talk to you about the archaeology.
>> No. 15059 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 11:47 pm
15059 spacer
>>15058
There is probably a planet far away that has made the exact same technological advances as us who have something like that.

For all we know there's an alien observing us from the void of space and questioning why people celebrate football in this way (after laughing/feeling disgusted with how we reproduce) and contemplating pressing the big red button.
>> No. 15060 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 11:49 pm
15060 spacer
>>15058

My nomination for POTY.

Honestly gave me a good chuckle, and I get your point - but on a minor (miner) note, archaeology will always have some interesting returns, with football, all society gets in return is loutish behaviour and piss heads beating up minorities.

It's a sign that society is so creatively bankrupt that we just need to be brain dead sponges and just go with whats considered normal and easy to follow.
>> No. 15061 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 11:53 pm
15061 spacer
>>15059
I expect they have documentaries of us having sex in a similar way we have them for other animals.
>> No. 15062 Anonymous
14th May 2014
Wednesday 11:56 pm
15062 spacer
>>15060
It's some shitty copypasta that's been going around the social medias since a few days ago.
>> No. 15063 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 12:01 am
15063 spacer
>>15058
> A cheer cascades through the building and you can only wonder why.
Oh god. Every time I've been in a pub while the football is on this happens. Suddenly everyone shouts joyously and jumps out of their seat - everyone but me, who is startled by the sudden eruption.
>> No. 15064 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 12:05 am
15064 spacer
>>15058
I saw this posted on facebook the other day. You big old cheater.
>> No. 15065 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 12:08 am
15065 spacer
>>15064
Also if I could be arsed I'd write an articulate post about the cultural importance of football and sport in general and the sorts of important societal bonds it induces and promotes.

I can't be arsed now though.
>> No. 15067 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 1:16 am
15067 spacer
It's not even that hard to avoid the archaeology.

The last time anybody spoke to me about it was the bloke who comes to work to empty the vag-rag bin out of the ladies, and really, you have to take pity on someone with a job like that and humour them.

Having said that, I don't watch TV and I listen to Radio 3 on a morning, because it's the only one where they won't be talking about the inane bollocks every other station is (or the pretentious bollocks Radio 4 is). I'm not sure what kind of social charade the fellow who wrote that copypasta is attempting to keep up, but perhaps they need to find a circle of more like-minded folk.
>> No. 15070 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 1:32 am
15070 spacer
The constant need in society to be an enthusiastic extroverted go-getter to get ahead in life.

Sometimes I just want to be a miserable cunt. I wish I just mined bitcoins when it first started and sell them now so I can be a millionaire and just live in a mansion filled with video games and sex dolls.
>> No. 15072 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 9:50 am
15072 spacer
>>15070
Really? You should come where I work because everyone is a miserable cunt, and any glimmer of keenness or enthusiasm is met with frowns, sarcastic retort and cynical quips. I've personally had enough of that.
>> No. 15073 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 12:18 pm
15073 spacer

tap4dealsunsubscribe.jpg
150731507315073
Oh fuck off.
>> No. 15076 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 3:52 pm
15076 spacer
>>15070
Yeah I get you sort of. I despise stories of employers who advertise a job with an email address but actually only give the job to that one cunt who stalks them on linked in and rings them up personally. Fuck off, I'm not applying to work in a call centre - maybe I prefer to email rather than phone people? Certainly gives a better record of what was said to refer back to.
>> No. 15078 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 4:16 pm
15078 spacer
I thought I'd bought some dry wors on Amazon as the name of the item was "dry wors". Turns out that it's actually dry wors spice. Woo hoo.
>> No. 15079 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 4:32 pm
15079 spacer
>>15078
Just make your own dry wors or biltong or jerky at home with it. Can't be too hard. Or use the spices in any beef-based recipe, could turn out nicely. Maybe on steak?
>> No. 15094 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 7:37 pm
15094 spacer
>>15072
>any glimmer of keenness or enthusiasm is met with frowns, sarcastic retort and cynical quips
This sounds wonderful, are you hiring?
>> No. 15101 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 8:48 pm
15101 spacer
>>15079

It's a kilogram bag and I doubt I'll use any of it. I'm just returning it for a refund.
>> No. 15114 Anonymous
15th May 2014
Thursday 9:29 pm
15114 spacer

ooh-matron.gif
151141511415114
>>15101
Ah, here I was thinking it was just a wors or two. Nevermind, when you get your refund in can I recommend http://www.biltongcompany.co.uk/ to you? Excellent customer service and fast delivery. And absolutely no doubt over whether you're actually getting some sausage.
>> No. 15198 Anonymous
17th May 2014
Saturday 11:11 pm
15198 spacer
Fucking mobile phone companies that keep ringing and trying to get me to upgrade early or something. Fuck off, I pay my contract each month - stop nagging me about shit I don't care about. Half the time I don't even know if it's really Orange or just some call centre saying they are Orange and trying to merk my credit card details.
>> No. 15219 Anonymous
19th May 2014
Monday 12:47 am
15219 spacer

ffs.png
152191521915219
I'm sure running logistics like this on a national scale is no walk in the park, but Jesus fucking Christ I want my shit now. Was it really necessary to take it walkabouts around Birmingham?
>> No. 15220 Anonymous
19th May 2014
Monday 1:11 am
15220 spacer
>>15114
Susmans is also quite decent. I'm not a particular fan of droe wors so I can't really comment on that (the one time I had some from there it seemed decent) but the stukkies in particular were really up to snuff.
>> No. 15221 Anonymous
19th May 2014
Monday 9:03 am
15221 spacer
>>15219
I had a parcel coming from Manchester and I live in Devon, it went from Manchester to Birmingham then to Cardiff then back to Birmingham. Then it went to Bristol and finally Exeter before being delivered to me. So it took about 3 more days for it to get delivered than it should've.
>> No. 15391 Anonymous
6th June 2014
Friday 1:48 pm
15391 spacer
People who waffle when telling you something. For example, someone was talking about something that happened at work and every five seconds they digressed and started talking about unnecessary shit that I (or anyone else) didn't need or want to know before continuing with the actual story. Fucking get on with it...
>> No. 15393 Anonymous
6th June 2014
Friday 2:01 pm
15393 spacer
People who don't laugh at my jokes. Yeah, I know, but 9 out of 10 of my deadpans get me looked at like I was some kind of kitten drowning maniac and I refuse to accept any responsibility.

>>15391

I've got a friend who likes to preface things with "it's a long story", before telling me all about them. I think it's more of a reflex.
>> No. 15394 Anonymous
6th June 2014
Friday 2:02 pm
15394 spacer
>>15391
> People who waffle when telling you something.
Oh god that really does annoy me. My other half is terrible for this. So many times I ask a question that requires a one word answer and I get three paragraphs.
>> No. 15395 Anonymous
6th June 2014
Friday 2:14 pm
15395 spacer
>>15393
We have someone in work who it is said will give you a straight answer to any question, but it may take them half an hour to get there.
>> No. 15413 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 10:32 am
15413 spacer
Youtube captions, and Youtube design generally. I've forgotten when these were introduced but they're really, really fucking irritating. when viewing a youtube video I have to first pause it, disable the captions, change settings to 720p, then hit the fullscreen button. It's fucking ridiculous that despite my knowing fuck all about computing that highly-paid 'experts' can pick up on these stupid errors.
>> No. 15414 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 10:59 am
15414 spacer

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>>15413
I don't have any of those problems. I'm not promising it'll make a difference if not, but have you set these correctly? Automatically selecting player size and playback quality has been improved over time. I also recognise the possibility that at least the quality selection "errors" are intentional. I'm sure you can imagine that the appropriate quality for a particular resolution can be better determined algorithmically than by your average user and also that defaulting to a lower quality would save massive amounts of bandwidth. So where the system is under high load they might discard user preferences. No amount of bad UI design can match the frustration of stuttering video.

There are also extensions available that will solve your issues.
>> No. 15415 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 11:20 am
15415 spacer
>>15414
I have used those settings; what's really irritating is that, if you want it to play HD on fullscreen, then want to check another tab by exiting fullscreen, the video will take a moment to 'un-HD' itself as you exit fullscreen, then assuming you want to tab back, pause as you 're-HD' it.

It's fucking ridiculous and a website shouldn't require extensions to not be stupid, especially given that I often use computers which I do not have administrative privileges over (such as library PCs).
>> No. 15416 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 11:21 am
15416 spacer
>>15415
And they STILL don't have a search tool for one's saved videos, despite this being a requested feature from users for well over half a decade by this point.

What utter fucking cunts.
>> No. 15427 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 2:25 pm
15427 spacer
https://www.youtube.com/v/9u6Bfnq3aZk
>> No. 15428 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 7:27 pm
15428 spacer
Robert Webb being all snarky about things actors haven't even got wrong. How's it Jason Statham's fault if the continuity guy missed the tiniest object on screen? You no talent shit muncher.
>> No. 15429 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 7:31 pm
15429 spacer
Summer. Fuck the sun.
>> No. 15430 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 11:05 pm
15430 spacer
>>15413
Do they still aggressively push G+?
>>15429
It's raining here. I could revel in some sunlight but all I have is a water pouring down like crazy. Fancy an exchange?

Not that I don't like water (I love it) but it has been way too much
>> No. 15431 Anonymous
7th June 2014
Saturday 11:11 pm
15431 spacer
>>15429

You're preaching to the choir m8. There must be a happy medium between TEACON1 levels of monsoons with very very frightening thunderbolts and lightning and the absurd amount of sunlight we had last year though.

It's the end of days I tell you.
>> No. 15467 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 5:08 pm
15467 spacer
The recent "stealth reduction" in the strength of a number of strong lagers from 5% to 4.8% ABV. I've just realised that much like the Stella Artois I bought last week, the cans of Carlsberg Export in my fridge are only a piddling 4.8%. I did not pay any less for them than I used to pay for the 5% ones. I feel totally robbed and I miss having easy access to Polish beer. Boo.
>> No. 15468 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 5:49 pm
15468 spacer
>>15467
I know quite a few people who are into homebrewing, which seems like the best solution. Though it requires more effort than going down the offie.
>> No. 15470 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 6:17 pm
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>>15468
The alternative is just to pay for decent beer instead of mass-produced carbonated pisswater.
>> No. 15471 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 6:30 pm
15471 spacer
>>15470

I am perfectly happy to pay for decent beer when I can find it. However, when the best you can find is bloody Stella, and then discover that said pisswater is now even pissier than it was before it is somewhat galling.

Sage because I just know someone's going to step in and suggest I keep a cellar full of interesting real ales just in case I want to sample one when none of our fair isle's ubiquitous Real Ale Shoppes are open.
>> No. 15472 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 6:35 pm
15472 spacer

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>>15467
Your offie doesn't have polish lager? I cant go in one without seeing this stuff.
>> No. 15473 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 6:38 pm
15473 spacer
>>15472

That shit is piss. Lech is where the goodness resides.
>> No. 15474 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 6:41 pm
15474 spacer
>>15472
>>15473

You're both wrong. Zubr is the king of relatively easy to find Polish beers.

And no, sadly. Local offies do have it but shut pretty early (8pm early). The co-op was carrying it for a while (at a whopping £7 for four cans), but aren't any longer.

I have a sads.
>> No. 15475 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 7:15 pm
15475 spacer
I'm amazed Brits like Polish pisswater, I hated the stuff growing up and I didn't understand it's appeal.
>> No. 15477 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 7:47 pm
15477 spacer
>>15475
Cultural exchange m8 they take our jobs, we take their beer.
>> No. 15478 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 7:51 pm
15478 spacer
>>15477

That should give us the chutzpah to keep our women.
>> No. 15479 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 7:58 pm
15479 spacer
>>15478
No one wants British women. No one.
>> No. 15480 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 8:08 pm
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>>15479
>> No. 15481 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 8:12 pm
15481 spacer
>>15480

Hermione Granger is an objectively gorgeous women whose looks just don't quite click for me. You know that click? When you see a certain girls and it's just all "CLICK" and whatever.
>> No. 15482 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 8:17 pm
15482 spacer
>>15481
She looks better with long hair.

You seen that picture of her flashing her muff?
>> No. 15483 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 8:18 pm
15483 spacer
>>15480
She may as well be american m8.

And all girls that look like that are toffo's polo cunts anyway. I live with one, she is vapid as they come.
>> No. 15484 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 8:21 pm
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Princess-Beatrice-Spaghetti-Head.jpg
154841548415484
"Cream of the crop"
>> No. 15485 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 8:23 pm
15485 spacer
>>15482

I probably have. I wish porn was banned on the internet, then I'd care when I saw that sort of thing. Now it's just like "eh, whatever, Scarlett Johanson's nude? Pfft, I suppose I'll take a look".

>>15483

>I live with one

A solid sample size as ever, GeneralisationLad.
>> No. 15486 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 8:31 pm
15486 spacer
>>15485
Pretty accurate though.
>> No. 15490 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 9:39 pm
15490 spacer

zj6Z3Rr.jpg
154901549015490
>>15483
My m8's met Emma Watson at one of her posh m8s parties, apparently she's a stuck up bitch and so are her peers.
>> No. 15493 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 9:55 pm
15493 spacer
>>15490

Exactly why I'd love to pound her ruthlessly up the bottom.
>> No. 15494 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 10:05 pm
15494 spacer
>>15490
Shocker.
>> No. 15507 Anonymous
8th June 2014
Sunday 11:32 pm
15507 spacer
>>15490
I bet Daniel Radcliffe is a decent bloke though.
>> No. 15514 Anonymous
9th June 2014
Monday 9:57 am
15514 spacer
>>15507

He seems genuinely nice, albeit a bit of a sperg.

Emma Watson doesn't come off as a bitch though, either. So who knows.
>> No. 15515 Anonymous
9th June 2014
Monday 10:17 am
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>>15481
By click I'm assuming you mean erection.
>> No. 15517 Anonymous
9th June 2014
Monday 11:45 am
15517 spacer

daniel-radcliffe[1].jpg
155171551715517
>>15507>>15514
libellad reporting, can't speak for Radcliffe but apparently Grint is a decent sort.
>> No. 15519 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 6:51 am
15519 spacer
Tic Tac Spearmint Twists. The little greens ones taste rubbish.

#barrelscrapping
>> No. 15520 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 7:19 am
15520 spacer
This fucking thread.
>> No. 15523 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 9:15 pm
15523 spacer
You know, right, when you open a Magnum, not like the gun, but the, err, ice creams, so like, when you open a Magnum, the ice cream, and the little, erm, bit you pull open, like the top bit, sort of sticks to itself, right? And you have to like, pull it open again. And then maybe again. Yeah, that's a bit annoying.
>> No. 15524 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 10:15 pm
15524 spacer
>>15523
I don't suppose you'd like an opening slot at the Apollo?
>> No. 15525 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 10:22 pm
15525 spacer
>>15524

Yeah, umm, alright. I hope my stuff about Fruit-Tellas isn't to blue though.
>> No. 15526 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 10:38 pm
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>>15525

*too, rather.
>> No. 15527 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 11:02 pm
15527 spacer
>>15523
Go to bed Stewart.
>> No. 15528 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 11:13 pm
15528 spacer
>>15527

Not nearly enough repetition of the word "magnum".
>> No. 15529 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 11:17 pm
15529 spacer
>>15528

The first draft had about 5.
>> No. 15536 Anonymous
12th June 2014
Thursday 4:04 am
15536 spacer
Is there any difference between ice cream and "gelato"?

If not, then I hereby declare any person ever calling an ice cream that again a cunt of the highest order.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 15537 Anonymous
12th June 2014
Thursday 9:18 am
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>>15536

5 minutes on Google would have cleared this up for you.
>> No. 15538 Anonymous
12th June 2014
Thursday 5:22 pm
15538 spacer
>>15537

But now I'm all angry about the difference between "Italian Ice" and "Sorbet"! Fuck! ARGH!
>> No. 15539 Anonymous
12th June 2014
Thursday 8:34 pm
15539 spacer
>>15536
Jesus you're a thick cunt.

My personal /101/ moment is people like yourself, quick to judge and make assertions rather than step back and understand a situation.
>> No. 15540 Anonymous
13th June 2014
Friday 2:55 pm
15540 spacer
>>15539
You must live in a daily maelstrom of frustration and ground teeth.

Have you ever considered voting Tory?
>> No. 15556 Anonymous
23rd June 2014
Monday 8:53 pm
15556 spacer
I've been watching Channel 4 and it's associated channels for about 2 and a half hours today and Dawn Porter has assured me she holds the key to my individuality at least 4000 times already.

It's not just annoying because of how repetitive and patronising it is, but because the part of me that takes an unhealthy interest in how TV works can't help but think of Mrs Porter as a boring, dried up brand, that no one whose fashion interest extends beyond bothering to cover their genitals would ever possibly care to watch.
>> No. 15560 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 12:22 am
15560 spacer
>>15556
I found out today that not only did she marry Chris O'Dowd, but now styles her name as Dawn O'Porter rather than just Dawn Porter. Something about the cynical preservation of her name (and therefore her "brand") twinned with this ridiculous spin on double-barrelling surnames after marriage just struck me as simply yet more evidence of what a complete waste of oxygen the woman is.

I mean seriously. O'Porter. You can't make this shit up.
>> No. 15565 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 4:20 am
15565 spacer
>>15556
>>15560
I feel that your hate is misplaced. Use it wisely.
>> No. 15578 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 2:40 pm
15578 spacer
What's going on with MTV rock and kerrang this last week? They've both been nothing but linkin park and limp bizkit.

CRAWLING IN MY SKIN THESE WOUNDS THEY WILL NOT HEAL
>> No. 15579 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 3:02 pm
15579 spacer
>>15578
I think they might do that every year at this sort of time. As it's the beginning of summer/graduation time, they go for the nostalgic summer rock hits of 10-15 years ago, so stuff like Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park, Alien Ant Farm, Bowling For Soup, Sum 41 et al.
>> No. 15580 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 3:21 pm
15580 spacer
I can't even imagine how someone would summon the energy to actively give a shit about Dawn Porter changing her name.
>> No. 15581 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 3:36 pm
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>>15579

You have no idea how old that makes me feel. We used to joke that our music would one day serve as nostalgia night fodder. It's all come true. All is doom. I'm going to take some drugs.
>> No. 15583 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 3:45 pm
15583 spacer
>>15579
God music was so shit back then. The advent of the internet really helped with discovering worthwhile stuff.
MTV 2 quickly went to the dogs with a 5 song a day rotation.
>> No. 15584 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 4:01 pm
15584 spacer
>>15578
Linkin Park headlined Download and Limp Bizkit are playing Sonisphere next weekend.
>> No. 15585 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 4:16 pm
15585 spacer
>>15581
You are not alone m9.
>> No. 15586 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 5:29 pm
15586 spacer
>>15579>>15581

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Teenage-Dirtbags-Various-Artists/dp/B00DYQLETI

Every single song on this album takes you right back to 2004.
>> No. 15587 Anonymous
26th June 2014
Thursday 5:13 am
15587 spacer
Jesus christ, fuck pop punk. My mate's gorlfriend is in love with this band called Patent Pending, and they are fucking awful. It's some kind of "super group" made up of washed up ex-members of the old pop punk bands who were too shit to still be around today, like Bowling For Soup.

Fuck I think I'm going to wretch.
>> No. 15593 Anonymous
26th June 2014
Thursday 10:44 am
15593 spacer
>>15587
I'm in total agreement with you, but as a teenlad I respected the catchy-ness of pop punk songs. Most of them were dross, but some where quite tongue-in-cheek and humorous. Notably the Blood Hound Gang.

However, yes, there was a slew of pop punk rubbish in the early 2000's. A friend of mine from secondary used to be knee-deep in all of this bollox, he even was in a couple of bands himself. A bit of a dim-witted fellow, and not much of a looker, he realised that being in a pop punk band would result in oceans of clunge. And that was true. He had some of the hottest girlfriends in school, all because he wore his pink and black chequered wrist bands, spiked his hair and constantly had headphones on lip syncing. All the emo girls worshipped him and in some cases even the lads gravitated to his popularity.
>> No. 15594 Anonymous
26th June 2014
Thursday 11:24 am
15594 spacer
>>15593
Are emos still around? Seems as if when the clock struck midnight on New Years Day 2010 they all vanished into the ether.
>> No. 15595 Anonymous
26th June 2014
Thursday 11:36 am
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>>15594
Did the emos all become hipsters? Is that it?
>> No. 15596 Anonymous
26th June 2014
Thursday 11:45 am
15596 spacer
>>15593

I wish I'd figured out courtship was all about lying about everything all the time at that age. Could have had Emo pussy by the tonne. Well, through shirt boob touching, but I doubt I'd have known the difference.
>> No. 15597 Anonymous
26th June 2014
Thursday 3:13 pm
15597 spacer
>>15594
They are rare post 2010, even 2009 they started to dwindle. You get the odd lad, but more likely over-weight / frightfully skinny lass with jet black hair covering her face that's incessantly pushed to one side with poorly painted black nails.

>>15595
That term is so ambiguous, I thought it's over-used by now.
>> No. 15628 Anonymous
29th June 2014
Sunday 11:05 pm
15628 spacer
I want to make a post, but I can't find the thread because I only use /sfw/ these days and I have no idea which board it was on. It had a David Firth video about the sound of 2009.
>> No. 15629 Anonymous
29th June 2014
Sunday 11:33 pm
15629 spacer
>>15628
I hate David Firth.
>> No. 15630 Anonymous
30th June 2014
Monday 6:31 pm
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>>15595

I think the "subcultures" of our youth are simply becoming more and more homogeneous as time goes on.

Back in the 90s we had goths, punks, metalheads, ravers, skins, an early form of proto-chav, and of course the iconic grunge grebos and post-hippys. People split into many different groups based on who they hung out with and what bands they liked, and which magazines they read.

In the 2000s we had that wierd phase of nu-metal everyone went through, but a lot of these people became "real" metalheads later. Then, we saw goths gradually start wearing colours, smiling, and fraternising with pop-punx to kind of merge together into this one weird Greenday/Fallout Boy/MCR/P!ATD worshipping mess. Most people called it emo. There was also the brief indie craze thanks to bands like The Arctic Monkeys, The Fray, and loads of other bands starting with The. I believe here is where the roots of hipsterism took hold, with their pointy shoes, floppy hair and cardigans.

By the end of the 2000s, emos had continued mutating (it went through the entire "scene kid" stage in less than two years if I remember rightly), and with the addition of Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram and other such smartphone social media sites taking over the youth communication paradigm, things got confusing real fast. Music, popular culture, and everything else that typically defined a subculture and gave the kids something to identify with was suddenly consumed by this big, all encompassing entity we call "the internet". As a result, kinds these days no longer have distinct subcultures (unless they join ranks with the more grown up populations of the older ones), they only have this sliding scale between scene and hip.

The only one that hasn't changed at all over the years is the chav, but that's a matter of upbringing rather than personal choice really, and I feel sorry for people who end up trapped in the circumstances that cause you to grow into a subhuman mong.
>> No. 15631 Anonymous
30th June 2014
Monday 6:58 pm
15631 spacer
>>15630

Ha! I declared the subculture dead over a year ago. I win! I beat you and Clive from Vice.

But yeah, you're right. Although "scene" and "emo" were basically the same thing only scene kids were the better looking emos with less grey/black got called. They had sick photoshop skills and a Myspace as hot as molten cool. So was more of a hierarchal thing in truth.

It's still pretty shit though. I could really use a club for losers and weirdos, what with ISIS not taking non-eskimos I don't really fit in anywhere.

*plays tiny violin*
>> No. 15633 Anonymous
30th June 2014
Monday 11:53 pm
15633 spacer
>>15631
Your local university's Tabletop Games Society is always open, lad.
>> No. 15634 Anonymous
30th June 2014
Monday 11:58 pm
15634 spacer
>>15633

Or take the mega-loser option and become a furry.
>> No. 15635 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:01 am
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>>15634

Furries are the losers of the lates 00s and early 10s, if you want to be hip in your unhipness, get yourself on a brony subreddit. Saying that though, the whole Brony thing has been going for a while now, the next wave is due within a year or two.

Does anyone have any idea what the next big thing for losers might be? Taking all bets.
>> No. 15636 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:03 am
15636 spacer
>>15634
Oh come on, lad. That's unfair on mega-losers.
>> No. 15638 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:07 am
15638 spacer
>>15633

Every time someone on this site assumes I'm university I get a little more depressed. I do still have a few Dark Eldar knocking about under my bed though.

>>15634>>15635

I said losers and weirdos not shit munchers and morons.

These are legitimate distinctions.
>> No. 15639 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:12 am
15639 spacer
>>15638
>Dark Eldar

You really are a fucking saddo.

Imperial Guard mandem 4lyfe.
>> No. 15640 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:17 am
15640 spacer

1369304888127.jpg
156401564015640
>>15639
>>15638

I have both. The recent DEldar line has some really nice sculpts.
>> No. 15641 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:45 am
15641 spacer
Something I've noticed recently on BBC TV is all the presenters seem under oath to pronounce the word year as 'yurgh' in a similar way as this chap:
https://www.youtube.com/v/eKFjWR7X5dU

I'm not sure if this is a new thing or if I'm just a dumb oik who's always said it so it rhymes with 'ear' without realising.
>> No. 15642 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:49 am
15642 spacer
>>15639

I got them because they looked cool/easy to paint. Both of these things are facts. Didn't have a clue how to play them though.
>> No. 15671 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 3:33 pm
15671 spacer
The 'British Problems' subreddit really winds me up for some reason. I visited it thinking it'd have the same sort of humour as this site, but instead its just people moaning about the telly or posting things like MY GF PUTS MILK IN HER TEA BEFORE TAKING OUT THE TEABAG HAHA MEGA LOLS...really annoying.
>> No. 15673 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 4:11 pm
15673 spacer
>>15671
Quite standard for Reddit.
>> No. 15674 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 4:14 pm
15674 spacer
>>15641
I know what you mean by 'yurgh' but I'm not sure it's the same thing as posho 'yah'. My History teacher always said it as yurgh and it confused the hell out of me, because her accent was completely unremarkable.
>> No. 15675 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 4:53 pm
15675 spacer
>>15671

That's about a quarter of .gs content, bruv.
>> No. 15676 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 5:38 pm
15676 spacer
>>15641

The BBC are a set of fascists who hate all regional and lower class accents. It has always irritated me.
>> No. 15678 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 6:15 pm
15678 spacer
>>15676

Grammar Nazis!
>> No. 15680 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 8:13 pm
15680 spacer
>>15671
it's like a poor man's /101/ really. It can be amusing (though painfully obvious like "Babestation can only show boobs late at night, but BBC Parliament is allowed to show cunts all day" but mostly it's shit about tea, the Daily Mail and not liking football.

A bit like reddit in general, jack of all trades, master of none. With added racism.
>> No. 15681 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 8:30 pm
15681 spacer
>>15680
>Racism
You what? Racism? On Reddit?
>> No. 15683 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 4:44 am
15683 spacer
FAQs on websites when it's obvious no one has asked these questions due to the website/event being new or that no one in their right mind would ask certain questions.

Also people who refer to themselves in the third person as if they have staff to write bullshit about them.
>> No. 15684 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 8:07 am
15684 spacer
I never understood channels like this:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4s1DE9J4DHzZYXMltSMAg

Is it comedy? Trolling? Art?

A lad smashing up food and making suggestive gestures to me never struck me as cutting edge or even remotely funny - and he has nearly 3.5 M subs. I don't understand this world.
>> No. 15685 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 10:01 am
15685 spacer
>>15681
The big subreddits like /r/worldnews are as racist as it gets without explicitly saying [INSERT BAD WORD HERE] (sorry modlads). Essentially, where you see people talking about black culture and whatever (but they like the nice blacks!), they have probably making ridiculous stereotypes. Of course, there's smaller subreddits that are a bit like /pol/ from the other place but more serious. A bit like with UKIP's local councillors and whatnot, they try to hide it but it's pretty clear really.

>>15684
I used to do this as a 13 year old teenlad making websites on freewebs.

sage for talking about shit websites and the pricks on them
>> No. 15687 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 11:48 am
15687 spacer
>>15684

About 10 months ago I watched about 12 episodes back to back and thought they were hilarious.

I haven't watched another since.
>> No. 15689 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 2:54 pm
15689 spacer
>>15687
Same here.

It's one joke, done well, and if you found it funny the first time, you'll probably find it funny whenever a new one pops up in your feed. I don't think it's designed to be 'cutting edge' comedy.
>> No. 15694 Anonymous
5th July 2014
Saturday 6:56 pm
15694 spacer
>>15684

There's some stuff that's just weirdly compelling to watch, I think. Stuff breaking is one of them. Stuff like Will It Blend?, and that channel where the guy just puts various different objects in a microwave in his back garden.

I'm quite sure these kinds of thing are most popular amongst younger viewers, but nontheless I don't find it hard to understand why people like it.
>> No. 15708 Anonymous
7th July 2014
Monday 5:57 pm
15708 spacer
When people use the WRONG FUCKING TIMEZONE.

Yes, I am 'that' lad from the cartoons thread.

It pisses me off to no end. Not only is it confusing but it's just... wrong.
>> No. 15721 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 1:13 am
15721 spacer
People who don't understand the difference between a timezone and observed time. *cough* >>15708 *cough*
>> No. 15722 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 1:18 am
15722 spacer
People who meta post.

Arrrgghh!
>> No. 15723 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 2:45 am
15723 spacer
>>15721
Assuming he didn't live in Indiana, his observed time was in EDT. Plus, he specified a time zone. An observed time would be like "20:00 New York time".
>> No. 15725 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 11:34 am
15725 spacer
>>15723
>his observed time was in EDT
You don't know that.
>> No. 15726 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 6:03 pm
15726 spacer
Chuggers.

I know they've probably been mentioned on here before, but I was in Birmingham for the first time in a while yesterday and christ, the city is infested with them. You literally cannot walk ten yards down the main high street without one of these obnoxious cunts harassing you, there must have been 30-40 of them on New Street alone, all working for the same charity.

The worst thing is that the City Council, in a rare moment of sanity, approved a bylaw to ban them from the city centre only for the ban to be recently overturned by government ministers because it "would have a negative effect on charity donations". Bollocks, its these cunts who give their charities a bad name, I'm sure there are far more effective ways of marketing your cause than employing a bunch of effusive white-dreadlocked twats to harass the living shit out of everyone.
>> No. 15727 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 6:05 pm
15727 spacer

why.png
157271572715727
The internet has bled into mainstream culture and I don't like it. Not because I want the internet to be a guarded castle where only I get to play, but because internet culture is inane, and that's how it used to be understood. Things that were once in-jokes or colloquialisms or silly turns of phrase are now appearing everywhere. Why am I looking at the word 'ship' on a news website? Are marketers just browsing tumblr reposts and ancient livejournal communities? I'm convinced many people in broadcast media and journalism will just suck up anything after a few minutes of browsing and shit it out in a bigger, more glittery box.
>> No. 15745 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 4:12 pm
15745 spacer
>>15727
> Are marketers just browsing tumblr reposts and ancient livejournal communities?
I think I once read an article that was confirming your speculation. Like, "find something popular and trendy and turn it into a slogan".
>> No. 15746 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 4:20 pm
15746 spacer
>>15727

Don't worry, they'll never take .gs. There's just no market for "beefy poz loads" or "mirth". I mean, what the hell does "mirth" even mean? It's just a silly made up word like "colloquialism".
>> No. 15751 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 5:37 pm
15751 spacer

Pointeyeshere.jpg
157511575115751
>>15746
What even is language, really.
>> No. 15752 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 6:18 pm
15752 spacer
A yank lass sent me a recipe from this website today.

http://www.irishcentral.com/

Fuck me, "Irish Americans", I don't think there is a more insufferable bunch of cunts on the face of this earth. I honestly don't understand why so many folks cling to this pretend ethnicity, but for some reason it really gets under my skin.

And I'm not even Irish. I can only imagine how the actual Irish feel about this lot of fucking ignorant posers.
>> No. 15753 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 6:53 pm
15753 spacer
>>15751
What is clocks?
>> No. 15756 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 9:44 pm
15756 spacer
I'm watching a charming and educational BBC4 documentary about cycling right now, and there's a scene where the host is riding and chatting with some Italians, and as this Italian is telling him about being an Italian cyclist, the host fires a hunk of nose rubbish off halfway through the scene. That's a re-shoot, ladies and gentlemen, seriously.

Also an American on the same shot just told me why "womens" bikes are a thing. Thank you, American.
>> No. 15762 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 10:12 pm
15762 spacer
>>15752
>And I'm not even Irish. I can only imagine how the actual Irish feel about this lot of fucking ignorant posers.
It's hard to hate them seeing as Ireland's treasury is funded entirely by naive American tourist dollars.
>> No. 15763 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 10:15 pm
15763 spacer
>>15762

Game of Thrones is really opening that up to an international audience. At least until people find out just what a "Dubrovnik" is.
>> No. 15772 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 10:33 pm
15772 spacer
>>15752
The irish hate them with equal measure.

There is nothing worse than walking down Temple Bar with a gaggle of overfed, tacky cunts with their warbling accents. 99% of all tourist tat is sold directly to Americans at a massive mark up, even the cunts that sell this shit know that they're cunts.

The only saving grace are the massive tips they leave - working as a bar man, you entertain these self-aggrandizing twats, and they'll leave you a hefty bit of cash.
>> No. 15784 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 1:14 am
15784 spacer
>>15756

Honking out a bogey is such normal behaviour amongst cyclists that it probably didn't register to the crew as being odd.

Tomorrow night at eleven, BBC Four will be showing my absolute favourite cycling documentary, Jorgen Leth's "A Sunday in Hell". It's about Paris-Roubaix, the queen of the spring classic races. The film has a wonderful reflective quality to it, a gentle meditation on the beauty of cycle racing.

Here's the intro, which sets the tone of the film:

https://www.youtube.com/v/3ktTXjSqvJc
>> No. 15792 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 3:54 pm
15792 spacer
Horatio Chapple.

I know being eaten by a polar bear isn't great, and I feel for his filthy rich family and friends.

But something tells me I wouldn't like him. His name, fucking hell - is there anything more pretentious? To name your kids as some kind of special snow flake? 99.9% of people who I've met with bizarre names like "zelda", "esme", "Hope", "Samuel-Jacob", and other double barrel wank are usually cunts.

So no, I feel bad for the bear that dead, he was was trying to eliminate another Etonian cunt, you won't be forgotten
>> No. 15795 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 4:45 pm
15795 spacer
>>15792

The rage of the impotent plebe; there never was a less charming sight.
>> No. 15796 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 5:35 pm
15796 spacer
>>15795

At least he probably knows how to spell pleb correctly.
>> No. 15798 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 5:43 pm
15798 spacer
>>15796

Learn to US Navy colloquialisms, idiot. Jeez.

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/plebe

Anyway, I'd sooner be a fool who can't spell than a prick who rubs his hands with delight when some poor kid who happens to have a double barrel name gets butchered.
>> No. 15801 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 5:57 pm
15801 spacer
>>15798

So you called him a first-year Naval Academy student. n1yankm8 he wont know wot hit im
>> No. 15802 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 5:59 pm
15802 spacer
>>15798
You use a US Navy colloquialism on a British board, to someone who shows no signs of actually being a first year U.S. military student, and you call >>15796 an idiot for not recognising it?

Tsk, and indeed tut.
>> No. 15803 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 6:11 pm
15803 spacer
>>15801>>15802

Are you being serious? Because I just searched "plebe" and found that definition, therefore my first line was entirely sarcastic.

I hope this clears things up for you guys.
>> No. 15804 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 7:02 pm
15804 spacer
The Bute Tunnel is closed. Google Maps rather helpfully reminds me of this by putting down three markers along the route through the tunnel it's telling me to take.
>> No. 15805 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 7:18 pm
15805 spacer
>>15798
I'm not rubbing my hands, I said it was bad. I'm saying that if he were alive and I met him, there is high chance that he was a cunt.
>> No. 15806 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 7:50 pm
15806 spacer
>>15805

"Another Etonian cunt" is dirt bag thing to say about a dead 17 year old, and you were clearly expressing a degree of joy at the slightly lessened chance of having to speak to someone with a private education.

I'd recommend you not being quite so unpleasant next time you want to level the accusation of "cunt" at someone, especially if said "cunt" is a dead kid.
>> No. 15807 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 8:00 pm
15807 spacer
>>15806
Well him being dead doesn't make him any more special to be honest.
>> No. 15808 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 8:03 pm
15808 spacer
No need to be such a vindictive wanker, twat.
>> No. 15809 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 8:25 pm
15809 spacer
>>15807

Right, well, that's not really the point I've been making. I'm just arguing that reducing someones son, best friend and whatever else he may have meant to people, down to nothing but an "Etonian cunt" is unnecessary and cruel. I'm aware those afore mentioned loved ones are a extremely unlikely ever to see your online postings, but again, that's not really the point. I think my point is that if you stop being such a negative post-modern such and such, and the whole planet may benefit.
>> No. 15810 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:02 pm
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>>15809
One polar bear didn't :(
>> No. 15811 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:07 pm
15811 spacer
> Horatio Chapple
Is he the rich cunt who thought he was a colonial adventurer? Good thing the natives (bears) fought back. I fucking hate rich cunts. One less cunt.
>> No. 15812 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:17 pm
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>>15808
No need for that fucking language, cunt.
>> No. 15813 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:17 pm
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>>15811
>I fucking hate rich cunts

Well they're infinitely prefereable to oiks who speak ill of the dead.
>> No. 15814 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:20 pm
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>>15813
I hear the weather is good in the Arctic this time of the year you utter cretin
>> No. 15815 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:28 pm
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>>15813
I'm sorry. I will worship him some more. Cunt. Fuck off.
>> No. 15816 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:38 pm
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>>15813

Stop arguing my point for me/parodying my shocking rationality.
>> No. 15817 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 9:46 pm
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>>15814
It's alright Baz, think you've had one too many mate. Take a walk around the block, get yesself a kebab and mebbe a pack o' lucky strike if ya gyro's come in yet.
>> No. 15818 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 10:42 pm
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>>15817

Only poshos smoke luckies, mate. Superkings for me.
>> No. 15819 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 11:09 pm
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>>15818
Thats right. Send in the polar bears.
>> No. 15820 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 11:31 pm
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>>15818
Cripes, the lower classes have found me out! The only option left is to deploy the usual football decoy:

"Did you see that ludicrous display last night?"

Us poshos don't smoke cigaretttes at all pleb, we prefer Cuban cigars or cigarillos hand rolled by third world orphans.
>> No. 15821 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 11:46 pm
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>>15820
What was Australia thinking, bringing plain packaging in so early?
>> No. 15831 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 11:58 am
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>>15809
Fuck off back to your posho schools lad if you don't like it
>> No. 15832 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 12:05 pm
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>>15809
>>15831
I think "Etonian cunt" should be added to a /zoo/ for anyone posting from Westminster.
>> No. 15835 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 12:44 pm
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At the risk of sounding callous, I don't understand why a rich boy being mauled by a polar bear while playing explorers on an island full of wild polar bears is newsworthy.
>> No. 15836 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 12:50 pm
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>>15835
You don't sound callous, you just seem like an attention craving pseudo-cynic desperate to stand out from the crowd with your brilliance.
>> No. 15837 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 1:02 pm
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>>15836
My mistake. I'll rephrase:

At the risk of sounding like an attention craving pseudo-cynic desperate to stand out from the crowd with my brilliance, I don't understand why a rich boy being mauled by a polar bear while playing explorers on an island full of wild polar bears is newsworthy.
>> No. 15838 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 1:09 pm
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>>15837

You don't sound like an attention craving pseudo-cynic desperate to stand out from the crowd with your brilliance, you just seem callous.
>> No. 15839 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 2:49 pm
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>>15837
It's newsworthy because it's a pretty unique story. You don't often see well educated young men being mauled to death by polar bears.

Anyway, my two pence is that it's sad that he died, even if he is a member of the bourgeoisie, but equally he put himself in that position by hanging around in polar bear territory so it's his fault for stepping on their turf unprepared.
>> No. 15840 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 3:05 pm
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>>15839
It's interesting because the company that took them up there were so woefully unprepared. Their tripwire mechanism was held together with paperclips and the only man with a gun didn't know how to operate it.
>> No. 15841 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 3:13 pm
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>>15839

Yeah, what a stupid 17 year old, he couldn't even box a Polar Bear to death. Probably all the white bread and champagne they fed him on.
>> No. 15842 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 3:43 pm
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>>15841
If only there was some way he could've avoided coming into contact with a polar bear in the first place. If only he hadn't been forced to go to an island teeming with polar bears. Alas.
>> No. 15843 Anonymous
11th July 2014
Friday 4:00 pm
15843 spacer
Brian Blessed punched a polar bear in the nose and told it to "fuck off".

I find that significantly more newsworthy than the lad who got eaten by a polar bear.
>> No. 15852 Anonymous
12th July 2014
Saturday 5:39 am
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>>15842

You're a bit of a bastard, you know.
>> No. 15854 Anonymous
13th July 2014
Sunday 4:47 pm
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For the first time in a number of years, I'm facing something of a clear-out. The last time I moved, the council would happily take half a dozen bags, and if I was doing it other than on bin day, the dump was open 9-5 in winter and 8-6.30 in the summer. Since then, the council have moved to winter hours all year round, and will only take black bags if you leave three or less - if you leave four or more, they'll take none of them and instead leave you a passive-aggressive note about it.

Cunts.
>> No. 15855 Anonymous
13th July 2014
Sunday 4:48 pm
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Twitterati
>> No. 15856 Anonymous
13th July 2014
Sunday 4:50 pm
15856 spacer
>>15854
Fly tipping.
>> No. 15857 Anonymous
13th July 2014
Sunday 7:44 pm
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>>15854

Privatisation will kill us all.
>> No. 15858 Anonymous
13th July 2014
Sunday 9:19 pm
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158581585815858
Undersheets which untuck themselves every single day.

Also unstackable tins. They're a standard size. Why on earth does anyone make the ones which balance precariously on top of each other?
>> No. 15859 Anonymous
13th July 2014
Sunday 9:42 pm
15859 spacer
>>15858

You've either got the wrong size or you're using cheap sheets. Check the size of your bed, there are loads and they vary by inches. Get yourself down to Debenhams for a decent set.

Then again you might just not be putting them on right. Try and get them right under the mattress by a fraction at every corner. 5 minutes will save you a lot of stress.
>> No. 15860 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 1:13 pm
15860 spacer
Look what you lads have gone and done

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/jul/14/mocking-eton-boy-death-politics-of-envy-socialist-worker-article-polar-bear-attack
>> No. 15861 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 1:57 pm
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>>15860

I never used to like Owen Jones all that much, but ever since he started agreeing with everything I say he's really charmed me. Smart guy.
>> No. 15862 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 2:22 pm
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>>15860
>Eton by a bear
Mirth.
>> No. 15863 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 2:54 pm
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>>15862
The most tasteless and childish best one is pic related.
>> No. 15864 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 6:24 pm
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When people don't understand that all phones are charged by Micro-USB nowadays.

>Have you got a Samsung charger?
No I don't have it with me, go ask Chris, he has his charger.
>But Chris has a Blackberry though.
Yeah but all chargers are the same nowadays.
>How are they all the same?
[long explanation to someone who apparently doesn't know what USB is so I have to explain that too]

It happens every few weeks. Drives me potty. They don't even want to try it. I just don't understand that part. I'm telling you it's the same and you're unsure I'm correct, but you don't even want to test it. It also sometimes involves them smugly telling me I'm wrong because Apple chargers don't work on Samsung phones.
>> No. 15865 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 7:02 pm
15865 spacer
>>15864
But they're not the same. Despite the appearance of Micro USB, the only thing that's successfully delivered a charge to my phone is the charger that came with it. It has flatly refused to take a charge from another power supply or from a generic cable plugged into my various computers.
>> No. 15866 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 7:03 pm
15866 spacer
My mum keeps calling my vaping kit a 'smoking thing' with the intonation as if it's no different to my prior 20-a-day habit. My dad is less fussed, probably because he was a smoker until he was in his mid-20s.

I can't be angry because this sort of thing is completely alien to my parents but I wish she'd be more appreciative that I'm not clogging my lungs with tar and arsenic anymore. It's no more a 'smoking thing' than a LED is a 'candle thing'.
>> No. 15867 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 7:04 pm
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>>15864
I think I bricked my Kindle by trying to use my samsung charger on it a few years ago. welp.
>> No. 15869 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 8:16 pm
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>>15864
The simple way of dealing with this is to say "Sorry, no" and disengage the person. Just don't make the same mistake I did when someone who knows asks because then you then have to explain why you didn't explain this to the person you fobbed off...

I also made the mistake of trying to help someone get their cat pictures off their phone and on the internet in work. It's not my fault Samsung won't allow mass storage use without Kies, blame them and their shitty proprietary software, not ICT and their rightful wariness of letting anyone install drivers...
>> No. 15871 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 10:59 pm
15871 spacer
TV ads.

Predominantly watching stuff online or on the BBC has really spoiled me. But watching Utopia right now is bloody infuriating. I don't want to buy your fucking Fosters so piss off.
>> No. 15872 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 11:01 pm
15872 spacer
>>15871
Good call. (Sorry.)
>> No. 15873 Anonymous
14th July 2014
Monday 11:08 pm
15873 spacer
>>15872

I'm going to bite open your fucking throat just so I can get at your piece of shit spine!
>> No. 15874 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 12:20 am
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158741587415874
They added these white lights to my street and I don't like it one bit.
>> No. 15875 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 12:21 am
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>>15874

Here is how it used to look.
>> No. 15876 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 12:32 am
15876 spacer
>>15874

This was on the daily politics soapbox a while ago, apparently there's uproar about it amongst the proles. You're not alone.

Google around for a pressure group or something so you can get them replaced.
>> No. 15877 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 2:19 am
15877 spacer
>>15874>>15875

Fuck you, pal. White lights are the future and I'm a fucking cyborg.

Ah, look at that, you can see green at night! GREEN AT NIGHT! It's absolutely gorgeous! Damn to your piss yellow world of monochrome bleakatude.
>> No. 15878 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 2:52 am
15878 spacer
>>15877

Fuck off, due to only having blinds up it bathes my room in an authoritarian white glow rather than in calming amber.
>> No. 15879 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 2:59 am
15879 spacer
>>15878

Your poor choice of window covering is of no consequence to me, flesh bag, I can see in 38 different wavelengths.

Although you know what might be cool, blue street lights. Not like kind of blue/white lights, but like full on blue blue, blue. You know?

I think my processors are malfunctioning :/
>> No. 15880 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 3:02 am
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>>15879

Just go and stick some of that blue see through plastic over the current shitty white lights, your extendo-legs should get you up there.
>> No. 15881 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 4:06 am
15881 spacer
Slugs and snails

I'm a bit of a nocturnal mess so I often put my rubbish out and spark up a cig at stupid O' clock.

The amount of times I've got slug remains on my shoes. I even tried to avoid one that I stepped on an hour earlier only for another one to squish underneath me as I tried to avoid it after staring at the floor in the dark.

>>15879
Blue lights apparent prevent crimes in Japanese areas so I'd like to see how they'd work over here.
>> No. 15882 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 4:55 am
15882 spacer
>>15881

Indeed. As a cyborg I believe three fundamental things, that blue lights can greatly reduce crime rates, increased arts funding will dramatically empower the proletariat, and that the original Deus Ex game is an authentic depiction of the 2050's.
>> No. 15884 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 3:35 pm
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>>15881
You just wait until it happens when you neglected to put shoes on because "I'm only popping 2m away from my front door to put the bins out, I can't be arsed putting my shoes on for that" and then you step on a cold clammy slug with the soft, unprotected sole of your bare foot.
>> No. 15885 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 3:42 pm
15885 spacer
Never thought I'd have to hide this thread.
>> No. 15886 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 3:51 pm
15886 spacer
>>15882
> and that the original Deus Ex game is an authentic depiction of the 2050's.
Who knows, who knows.
>> No. 15888 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 6:21 pm
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>>15882
'2050'? Lad... Isn't something missing from this image?
>> No. 15889 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 6:26 pm
15889 spacer
I'm so fucking bored of hearing about ARE GIRLS.

THE GIRLS

THESE GIRLS

Fuck off.
>> No. 15890 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 6:29 pm
15890 spacer
>>15889
Which girls?

On another note: Here come the girls. Girls! Girls! Girls, girls! Here come the giiiirrrrllllsssss!
>> No. 15892 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 9:58 pm
15892 spacer
>>15889

Misogynist.
>> No. 15893 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 10:20 pm
15893 spacer
>>15889

Are you a militant bummer-o-sexual? Or just a bit mad?
>> No. 15894 Anonymous
15th July 2014
Tuesday 10:55 pm
15894 spacer
>>15889
The last time I saw this phrase was on a box of eggs.

Sickening.
>> No. 15895 Anonymous
16th July 2014
Wednesday 5:50 pm
15895 spacer
>>15889
Are you on about those chavvy idiots that wander about city centres airing their pathetic disputes to all and sundry?
They usually bring up ARE GIRLS or whatever.

You know, you've seen them by the car park near the supermarket, where the railings are for the steps. Yeah, at the car park near Tesco, at that little bit with steps.
>> No. 15896 Anonymous
16th July 2014
Wednesday 10:43 pm
15896 spacer
Rather a specific and small annoyance, but people who go on holiday with their other half and spend every day telling facebook what an amazing time they're having. Not only are you trying to make me feel shit for being so lonely, you're failing because your girfriend is probably a bit of a munter and you're not really doing anything of interest. It's all rather tragic really.

People who try to be cunts and fail seem somewhat worse than the ones who succeed for some reason.
>> No. 15897 Anonymous
16th July 2014
Wednesday 10:44 pm
15897 spacer
>>15895
By the, the ramp. For trolleys. Not just trolleys, could be wheelchairs... pushchairs. By the ramp. You know, they run along the railings, then jump off, go "Oo!" Like that. You've seen em.
>> No. 15898 Anonymous
16th July 2014
Wednesday 10:53 pm
15898 spacer
>>15897

Our Tesco doesn't have a ramp because it isn't a fucking motte-and-bailey
>> No. 15899 Anonymous
16th July 2014
Wednesday 11:02 pm
15899 spacer
>>15896
Get yourself on a short break and feel a bit less lonely.

Hotel in Liverpool: £30/night.
Train tickets: £80
Typical British summer weather of pissing rain the entire fucking time: PRICELESS
>> No. 15900 Anonymous
18th July 2014
Friday 5:15 pm
15900 spacer
Absent-mindedness.

I was eating chips with a tub of gravy to dip them in while watching youtube and I just dipped my last fag right in the gravy.

Fucks sake...
>> No. 15901 Anonymous
18th July 2014
Friday 6:53 pm
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>>15900

This sounds like the opening to an /emo/ thread.
>> No. 15902 Anonymous
18th July 2014
Friday 7:12 pm
15902 spacer
>>15900
Wait for it to try. Gravy fags. Can't go wrong.
>> No. 15903 Anonymous
18th July 2014
Friday 10:23 pm
15903 spacer
At the moment it's some fucking bird that has been "singing" for the past three hours.

My choice is to endure it for a little while longer or close my windows on a hot summers night where I'm still sweating my balls off.
>> No. 15904 Anonymous
18th July 2014
Friday 10:31 pm
15904 spacer
>>15903
Nevermind it's a car alarm from a distance.

And now another one has gone off. Two car alarm.
>> No. 15905 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 12:55 am
15905 spacer
38c in the warehouse today.

Fuck.
>> No. 15906 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 1:04 am
15906 spacer
>>15905
I'm out tomorrow and it looks like thunderstorms in heatwave temperatures.

Well that's a headache and the decision to choose wearing a hoodie to brave the rain but otherwise feel roasting or go without and get soaked through.

Fuck summer and everyone who thinks it's magical weather.
>> No. 15907 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 1:05 am
15907 spacer
>>15902
>gravyfag
>> No. 15908 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 1:26 am
15908 spacer
>>15906

Just tie it around your waist m8.
>> No. 15909 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 2:13 am
15909 spacer
>>15908
I thought that fell out of fashion back in 2001? Then again I've never been someone who cares about fashion, as long as it doesn't have stains on it then it's fine.


I do have some pairs of jeans with the knees and ends torn. Just general wear and tear. I can't believe some people actually pay extra for deliberately torn jeans. I suppose that's a /101/ issue in itself. Clothing prices and a lack of functionality (I.E. pockets and how comfortable it is to wear)
>> No. 15910 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 2:21 am
15910 spacer
>>15909

People asking me where I got my jeans because they're a bit ripped and they want a pair like them pisses me off to no end considering they're just £10 jeans off the market that I haven't thrown away yet.
>> No. 15911 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 3:03 am
15911 spacer
>>15909

Yeah! Clothing prices are insane. If I have to feel guilty about buying clothes from abused third world labourers, can I at least do it on the cheap?
>> No. 15912 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 7:28 am
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>>15909
>I suppose that's a /101/ issue in itself. Clothing prices and a lack of functionality (I.E. pockets and how comfortable it is to wear)

Don't fucking get me started; I will bitch all day about how impossible it is to find clothes that either have pockets in the first place, or have big enough pockets for keeping even the bare minimum of necessary shit in them.
>> No. 15913 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 9:24 am
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>>15912
I have encountered this recently. What baffles me is, if you look at reviews online, sometimes you'll see that the manufacturer has changed the design, like people will be complaining the pockets used to be better and the like. Why do they make things worse on purpose?

Oh, and sleeves on t-shirts. It's like no t-shirts now have good sleeves, just a little bit of fabric to cover just a bit of your arm. They might as well be vests for crying out loud.
>> No. 15914 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 10:25 am
15914 spacer
Worst is when you spot a decent jumper/jacket/whatever and it has some good awful design or extra zipper or swastika on it.

Stop fucking up a decent jumper.
>> No. 15915 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 4:28 pm
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Huge outpourings of emotion.
>> No. 15916 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 6:39 am
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>>15915
If it's something like Diana, yeah, people by and large become total cunts. It's a bit different if you're a Palestinian or something.
>> No. 15917 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 1:13 pm
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Why is it that every single episode of QI that I've seen for what feels like the last 2 years at least has been series K? It's driving me fucking mental. Even just channel surfing i'll flick on to Dave and it'll be a repeat of an episode from series K. It's like it's fucking haunting me. I've seen them all at least a billion times. I no longer care about anything to do with K. In fact I fucking hate you letter K, you are the worst letter, I hope you get dropped from the alphabet you shit.
>> No. 15918 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 3:27 pm
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>>15917

I don't know about QI, but I swear there's only three episodes of Frost. Maybe they're all so similar I just can't tell them apart?
>> No. 15919 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 3:30 pm
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>>15917

Stephen Fry strikes me as one of those types who ends up using their army of Twitter followers to bully less fortunate types online because they said he was pretty shit and not all that.
>> No. 15920 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 3:35 pm
15920 spacer
>>15919

Didn't he do exactly that a while ago? Someone called him a name and he pulled the mentally ill card, deleted his twitter etc until his fans bullied the poor individual who upset him in to oblivion? Then he heroically came back to twitter.

I've just done some cursory googling and it appears he's had more than a few twitter encounters. I think the one I'm referring to is the one where he got called boring.
>> No. 15921 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 3:38 pm
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>>15916
There never is huge outpourings of emotion for Palestine mate.
>> No. 15922 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 3:47 pm
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>>15921

I think he meant the Palestinians themselves, m8.
>> No. 15923 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 4:27 pm
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>>15919
I've always wondered what it would take to get on the wrong side of Stephen Fry. I kind of imagine that most obvious trolling techniques he's probably seen a million times and is largely un-bothered by. I guess you just have to catch him in a bad mood or something. I can kinda see why being called boring would do it. It stands out as being such a banal criticism that it was probably said with total sincerity rather than for "trolling purposes" or to provoke a reaction.

Still, storming off of Twitter is pointless, especially if you're just going to come back again. I hate internet drama, but I guess i'm oddly jealous in a way because nothing dramatic ever happens in my life.
>> No. 15925 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 4:36 pm
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>>15923
> Still, storming off of %anything% is pointless, especially if you're just going to come back again.

It is not pointless if your goal is whoring for some attention. You will have to be recognised in the community you are going to perform such a trick, otherwise the results may be not very satisfying.
>> No. 15926 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 4:37 pm
15926 spacer
>>15923

Have you considered making a twitter account to make snide comments about the ability of unstable celebrities? If you use your real name you could probably dine out on the drama that ensues for years.
>> No. 15927 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 4:41 pm
15927 spacer
>>15926
Half of the tweets should be addressed to Sarah Millican and go on the perennial fa.gs theme of wanting to give her a guilty one. Then call her boring, because eating chocolate éclairs and having 5 sugars in your coffee isn't actually all that funny.
>> No. 15928 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 4:54 pm
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>>15926

> If you use your real name you could probably dine in at her Majesty's Pleasure for years.

Fixed that for you.
>> No. 15929 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 5:29 pm
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>>15921
I've been wearing a 'Free Palestine' badge for about a year now. It's incredible the amount of compliments and high-fives it gets me from brown-skinned strangers.
>> No. 15930 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 5:36 pm
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>>15929

Are you sure they're not just complimenting the trilby it is pinned on to?
>> No. 15932 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 5:43 pm
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>>15927
what? slowly giving yourself type 2 diabetes is the funniest thing ever! I'm guffawing now just thinking about it! Brb lads, just gonna get some biscuits! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAaaaaaaa
>> No. 15933 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 5:46 pm
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>>15930

Isn't the trend to wear them all on your backpack these days?
>> No. 15934 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 5:56 pm
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>>15929

I'm going to get a "Free Palestine" badge and a "I <3 Israel" badge and see where my post-modern wankery takes me.

Get ready, world, I'm comin'.
>> No. 15935 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 6:01 pm
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>>15934

In my yoof I actually had an "Iron - Lion - Zion" badge and quite a few people thought I was a Zionist.
>> No. 15936 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 6:03 pm
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>>15929
Wear a "I <3 Israel" one and get high fives from Jews.
>> No. 15937 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 7:09 pm
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Going out to dinner

I hate the waiting around when I've been ready for at least a good half an hour before we even head off so I have to sit there twiddling my thumbs and not be able to do anything else. I hate the small talk while waiting for the food. I hate the person who drinks their drink at a snail's pace at the end of a meal so I have to be tortured by dull conversations until they've finished their drink. I hate how long it takes to get the check sorted.

To me, eating a meal is something I prefer as a solitary activity. I guess you can say anything that can be done on your own is much more preferable to me. All I want to do is eat a meal and be done with it and do something else like watch a couple of youtube videos and read a book.

I am fully aware that this /101/ is probably something that only I have an issue with and I expect the claims that I'm an autistic individual with some hints of a sociopathic nature.
>> No. 15938 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 7:12 pm
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>>15937
> To me, eating a meal is something I prefer as a solitary activity.
You are not alone. I forget who, but some person once said that eating should be like going to the toilet - done alone, in a solitary booth if you must do it in public.

I actually have a very understanding other half, and she has agreed to not talk to me while I'm eating. I obviously waive this rule when we go out somewhere, as the main reason women want to go out is to be seen...and they don't want to be seen with some silent person.
>> No. 15939 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 7:26 pm
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>>15938
Going out to dinner with a friend or girlfriend is fine. My issue is family dinners.

I remember my dad complaining about how we never sit down at dinner as a family. All that would occur is my back to the telly while he watched and made very audible noise as he ate his food talking about the most dull subjects to my mum as my brother and I would sit in silence.

Out for dinner is pretty much the same except with the absence of a TV and my brother will just play around with his phone and to make sure I just don't get bored I head outside for a cigarette so the waiting process for the arrival of food is shortened.

It's got to the point where I need to distance myself from my family because I'm becoming something of a recluse.

Still waiting to go out. 9 times out of 10 they'll say "are you ready yet" if I'm not constantly checking up on them when I'm that person who is more or less ready first thing.
>> No. 15940 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 7:38 pm
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>>15938

>I forget who, but some person once said that eating should be like going to the toilet - done alone, in a solitary booth if you must do it in public.

David Mitchell.

Personally, I treat eating as the mere ingestion of nutrients, with no real cultural or interpersonal significance. If I'm going to sit down for a chat with someone, I'd rather do it without a mouthful of food or my dinner going cold on the table.

I think we need a substantial shift in cultural attitudes towards food - having the TV schedules packed with cookery programmes seems like a sick joke when overnutrition and inactivity are now the leading causes of premature death in the developed world. We made so much progress in de-normalising smoking, but squandered all those public health gains by normalising obesity. Nobody seems shocked that we are eating ourselves to death.
>> No. 15941 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 10:45 pm
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>>15940
You're coming off a bit autistic, to be frank.
>> No. 15942 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 10:49 pm
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>>15874

These have been common around my area for a couple of years now. I wondered what the point it, but I could only put the pieces together with them trimming down all the trees and foliage around the various public footpaths and assumed it's so the copper chopper (and their drones) can get a better look at everything without having to use the thermal all the time. It's nice to know my council tax is being used so with such ruthless efficiency to catch a few more yobs and stoners out though.

I remember when we used to have this thing called darkness, and it happened at night and it was kind of harder to see, but it might just be my memory playing tricks on me. My mate says they still have it in this place called "Countryside", but I'm not convinced it really exists.
>> No. 15943 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 10:49 pm
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There is a lot wrong with you lads. I think you are not normal.
>> No. 15944 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 11:19 pm
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>>15942

They told us it's LED lighting and its cheaper to run. The light seems more directional so it gives off less light pollution too. It's made it look a lot darker outside. I think I'd have a hard time witnessing a crime from my window now unless it happened right under a streetlight.
>> No. 15945 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 12:55 am
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>>15944

Ah. Well, that's a bit different then.

Ours are just these horribly obnoxious glaring, sterile white floodlamps that pierce even the darkest curtain. I'm terribly glad my bedroom doesn't face the street. The street itself has this weird feeling of a film set or soundstage at night. The sky is black, yet everything is perfectly illuminated as though it were late afternoon, terribly strange feeling.

I'm really quite sure this sort of thing isn't good for our mental health, but it seems to be becoming the norm.
>> No. 15946 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 10:55 am
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>>15945

I remember the change to these lights just a few years back. I live next to a large roundabout that sees a lot of traffic both vehicle and pedestrian.

It was jarring at first, the comforting warm amber glow that lit up the entire area replaced with a sterile white sheen that seems to only light up directly under the street lamp. I looked out the window feeling it was strangely dark outside like "what the bloody hell is going on?" then I find out they've been replaced. Now it has a strange creepy feel.

They told it was to help prevent crimes. So you can see the real colours someone is wearing. Problem is you can see bugger all now. What are you supposed to do? "Oi, while you mug and assault me will you stand directly under here so I can get a decent look at your face and clothes, mister?"

God help anybody with poor night vision.
>> No. 15947 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 10:46 pm
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The Commonwealth Games. I don't even watch a lot of TV, but I'm fed up of the BBC constantly bleating on about it.
>> No. 15948 Anonymous
22nd July 2014
Tuesday 1:35 am
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I've only just discovered there are no Galaxy Truffles in Celebration tins anymore.

This annoys me more than it should.
>> No. 15949 Anonymous
22nd July 2014
Tuesday 3:42 am
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>>15947

I realised during the World Cup that it's not so much the sport I hate, it's the fact that everyone keeps talking about it all the time.

I do not care who kicked the javelin the fastest.

>>15948

Kill them all, or before you know it there'll be nothing but Bountys repeatedly stomping you in the face.
>> No. 15950 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 7:46 pm
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Just bought a bottle of water for twice the cost of the same amount of a soft drink? Why not spend another £2.50 on this rebranded squash and spoil it with excess sugar?
>> No. 15951 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 7:47 pm
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Why is water more expensive than sugary drinks?
>> No. 15952 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 8:00 pm
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>Find out what happens when Allan goes on a road trip with Noel Fielding!

Suicide becomes a very real possibility?

>>15950

Some people go mad for Oasis and I've no idea why.
>> No. 15953 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 8:13 pm
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>>15952
Oasis or Blur?
>> No. 15954 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 10:53 pm
15954 spacer
8 Out of Ten Cats Does Countdown, it's like turning up the library and finding the popular kids have pushed your nerd friends into the corner. Go outside popular kids, leave us alone.
>> No. 15955 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 5:02 am
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>>15937

I absolutely agree. Eating out in general is silly because restaurant food is either incredibly unhealthy, expensive, disappointing, or a combination thereof. But at least alone you don't have to stare at someone else who's ordered something better than you.

I'm really considering opening a restaurant that is essentially a library full of armchairs and people who bring you food - very quietly.
>> No. 15964 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 12:43 am
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Getting emails about recent purchases and being told I should review them.

I make it a point to avoid buying off amazon marketplace because they ask you to give them a short review which I usually put "delivered quickly and was as described". I hate getting an email off just eat to say to review my latest takeaway because I get the feeling if I don't give them any review they'll just fart in my food next time I order there.

Then there's the constant SHARE ON FACEBOOK, TWITTER etc. Can't stand seeing it on porn site either. One day I'm going to slip up and have a status that says "ANON ENJOYED JAPANESE WIFE VOMITS INTO ANUS"
>> No. 15965 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 12:45 am
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>>15964
If nobody gave stars and reviewed like a little cunt (like you), then how would anyone know if something is good or not?
>> No. 15966 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 12:47 am
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>>15965
I don't need to make a review for a cable that cost me £1.99.
>> No. 15967 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 12:48 am
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>>15965
The same way people knew before the internet.
>> No. 15970 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 2:34 am
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>>15964

I reviewed a few things on Amazon and now they offer me things to review every month for free via Vine. The most recent example was a £400 soundbar. Spoilers: it's not as good as even a budget 5.1 home theatre system from 2010.
>> No. 15971 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 3:01 am
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>>15970
BRB, reviewing everything I've ever purchased on Amazon.
>> No. 15972 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 3:46 am
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>>15967
Calling the operator and telling them to connect you to your mother, so that she can ask her friends, and her friends can ask their friends, so that your mother gets back to you a couple of weeks later to let you know that the flesh-light that you so badly wanted is not really crap and that it averages about 4.5 stars out of 5?
>> No. 15973 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 3:54 am
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>>15970
How in depth are your reviews? Are you one of those people with the "top 1000 reviewer" title or something?
>> No. 15974 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 3:57 am
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The sun will come up soon. I'm going to shoot it down with my BB gun. Fuck the sun.
>> No. 15975 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 8:52 am
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>>15974
The heatwave ends today.

Sort of. It's still going to be above 20 celsius for another week but not above 25 celsius like before.
>> No. 15977 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 12:03 pm
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>>15973

Not a top x reviewer or anything. The stupid thing was they offered me to join twice before I accepted.

The trick isn't just to review everything, it's getting those helpful votes and I got about 230 on one of my reviews. Rather than write an essay I just think of the key things I would be interested in and a few things somebody would want to know if they had no idea what they wanted.
>> No. 15978 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 1:04 pm
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The fucking sun has decided to go away just when I need to wash almost every item of clothing in the house, and it rained on my first load of washing last night. I bet it rains again tonight. Bastard weather.
>> No. 15980 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 1:06 pm
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>>15978

Live under a balcony, m7. Works a fucking dream. My clothes still dry within 24 hours during tropical storms.
>> No. 15981 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 1:11 pm
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>>15980

Found you! I'm glad you were unbanned.
>> No. 15982 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 1:20 pm
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>>15980
Is that because it's 30 degrees where you are? It was 30 degrees where I was yesterday too!
>> No. 15983 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 2:58 pm
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>>15970
Yeah Vine is brilliant. Usually just get books or CDs but recently I've blagged a 1TB SSD and a fancy £50 rechargeable electric toothbrush.
>> No. 15984 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 3:50 pm
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>>15964
> Then there's the constant SHARE ON FACEBOOK, TWITTER etc
If you have adblock, stuff it with Fanboy's Social/Annoyances list.
>> No. 15985 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 5:55 am
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Parents who pierce their baby's ears
>> No. 15987 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 8:27 pm
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My own human body. I woke up earlier feeling awfully dehydrated and in the last 5 hours I've thrown up twice. How the fuck am I supposed to get water in me if I can't keep it down for more than half an hour?!
>> No. 15988 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 8:55 pm
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>>15987
You may be suffering from rabies.
>> No. 15989 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 8:56 pm
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>>15987
little sips
>> No. 15990 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 8:59 pm
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>>15988

Who should I nibble first?

>>15989

'kay.
>> No. 15991 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 9:24 pm
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Giffgaff.
>> No. 15992 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 9:48 pm
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>>15991
Why?
>> No. 15993 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 9:57 pm
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>>15992
For about a week now, it has been coming up with this "not registered" bullshit, whenever I try to call or text anywhere. Their signal is shit. I thought O2 was good. Fuck them, I am switching to T-Mobile or EE or whatever they call themselves now.
>> No. 15994 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:11 am
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When playing your MOBA of choice, and someone picks a support and doesn't ward. Probably only relevant for noob-tier players like myself.
>> No. 15995 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:40 am
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People who think it's okay to touch my knives.
>> No. 15996 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:46 am
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>>15995
Without asking? That's really bloody rude.

Do you mean cooking knives or prozzy murdering knives?
>> No. 15997 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:53 am
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>>15996

Cooking knives. It's hard to put into words how offensive and unpleasant it is to see someone waving around one of your knives - and they always pick up the most expensive/your favourite one. It's like showing the soles of your feet in certain countries - people are incredibly offended by it but the person doing it thinks it's absolutely fine, which somehow makes it worse.

And they're usually french.
>> No. 15998 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:56 am
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>>15997
I feel like that when someone picks up one of my guitars without asking. And usually plays fucking Wonderwall.
>> No. 15999 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 1:07 am
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>>15993
Of all the networks I've been on, Orange/EE has had the best and most consistent coverage around the UK for me. Pricey but worth it; I got far too accustomed to having reception on trains when I was with them that when I switched to 3 it was a big shock.
>> No. 16000 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 1:20 am
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>>15997
Mate, calm down, they are only knives. Put them in a safe in your bedroom if you want to worship them. Knives are for cutting shit.
>> No. 16001 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 8:14 am
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>>15997
One Christmas I went to a holiday cottage with some extended family. It was freezing cold, but the place came with a load of complimentary firewood. Unfortunately the landlady was/is batshit insane, and they were just logs without any kindling or nowt.

In any case, we decided to make our own kindling by cutting off bits from the logs using her kitchen knives. I don't feel bad about it at all, because she was a complete cunt.
>> No. 16002 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 8:46 am
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>>15998

Oh, well, Mr fucking Music Man, stop handing me your guitar with assumption I can play it. I can't, it's not like breathing or the firing of neurons in my brain, it's something I have to learn to do.

And don't ask me to sing when I tell you I don't play. I wish I had the voice of an angel, but I don't. Slowly I've come to accept that, you should too.
>> No. 16003 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:55 pm
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>>16002

I don't think any musician ever does this. With some trepidation I allow my closest friends to fuck around on my instruments, but only because I would seem like a cunt if I said no.
>> No. 16004 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 5:32 pm
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>>16000

You'd be surprised at how many people don't know how to use a knife. The chances are you don't either or you'd have noticed it. Anyway I'm talking about the knives I use at work. Bring your own fucking tools.
>> No. 16005 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 6:49 pm
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>>16004
What's there to know, lad? It isn't like driving. You just use the sharp end to cut stuff. End. Of.

Pretentious cunt.
>> No. 16006 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 7:15 pm
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>>16005

No you have to prepare the cutting space by walking around it in a perfect circle 7 times and wave the knives 3 times through the round sharpeny thing before you cut the sacrificial lamb at an exact 73 degree angle. Do you nothing about knives?
>> No. 16007 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 8:54 pm
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Going to restaurants and your food isn't brought out on a plate but a bit of wood or a paving slab because it's quirky and unusual.

This has happened twice in a row, one at a pub and the other at a somewhat respectable restaurant. I just want a fucking plate to eat my food off. One was a bit of wood shaped like a fucking chilli which wasn't ideal to eat a burger and chips on. Maybe I should order from the kid's menu, they seem to get an actual fucking plate.
>> No. 16008 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 9:02 pm
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>>16005
Not him, but if you're the sort of person that holds a knife other than the right most picture, you are a moron.
>> No. 16009 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 10:15 pm
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>>16008
Not him (again) but I've never been taught how to hold a knife (as in your picture) and I'm a bit offended to be called a moron. I hope you're just responding in kind because he called the other lad a cunt.
>> No. 16010 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 10:18 pm
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>>16009
Not him, but I'm assuming you're not the sort of lad who drops 20 grand on culinary school and gets all uppity when somebody holds his knives the wrong way because they haven't been told how to hold them the right way at a 20 grand culinary school.
>> No. 16011 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 10:27 pm
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>>16010

Nobody goes to culinary school. People who do are as daft as people who don't know how to use a knife.

Honestly, if you're preparing your own food, you have no excuse. Do you know how to safely use your oven? If yes, then why not a knife?

Ours is a nation of blunt knived imbeciles.
>> No. 16012 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 10:37 pm
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>>16011
Why is it not safe to hold a knife as in the first two examples?
>> No. 16013 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 10:45 pm
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>>16012

I'd imagine in the first example, you have less leverage over the knife, and thus less control. More prone to slippage and cutting the hand thats holding the food down to be cut.

The second one is just plain stupid, you loosen your grip to pointlessly place your finger on top, which adds nothing to the overall control.

These are just my own assertions.


>>16009

For me it came from experience, I started holding it like that, and it felt a lot better. I could do more precise cuts with speed. Then I watched some documentary about a restaurant or something ,and all the chefs were noted to be holding it the same way - interesting I thought.

You don't need to go to any culinary school (funny how expensive something like that is, when it all boils down to (ho ho) practice and common sense, mind, they probably teach you that quicker, but still). I'd never pay more than 200 quid for a good course. Everything else is just doing.
>> No. 16014 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 10:49 pm
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>>16008

So where is the index finger on the picture on the right? Hanging tight on the other side of the knife, near the blade? Thanks for your tip-top explanation.
>> No. 16015 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:06 pm
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>>16014
If you stop and think for a second, anyone with a shred of brain would clearly keep it as far away from the blade, whether by curling their index or otherwise.

Must your hand be held for every little thing? Best stay away from knives if thats bothering you.
>> No. 16016 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:09 pm
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>>16011
You're comparing apples and oranges lad. When preparing food for personal consumption people who aren't chefs don't (usually) wildly chop but cut things up slower and more precisely. Obviously if you're having to chop industrial quantities of food very quickly you need to learn the proper technique to do so safely but most people don't need to do this just to chop up a couple of chicken breasts.
>> No. 16017 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:23 pm
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>>16015
Not him but, seriously mate, where does the index finger go?
>> No. 16018 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:25 pm
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>>16011
You are right, lad. While we are at it, we should only give driving licences to people who can drive like in F1.
>> No. 16019 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:40 pm
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>>16015

>by curling their index or otherwise.

Thanks for your, yet again, tip-top explanation. I'll prepare my veg with the Otherwise approach going forward! Wish me luck.
>> No. 16020 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:46 pm
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>>16019

Have you considered buying pre chopped veg? You should let some other poor bugger take his life in his hands every time he steps up to the cutting board, that's why money was invented.
>> No. 16021 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:51 pm
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>>16017

Pick up a credit card like you would that knife, where does your index go? It curls naturally.
>> No. 16022 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 11:53 pm
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>>16020

More great advice, thanks!
>> No. 16023 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:04 am
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>>16022

You must behave like such a fucking cunt in real life.
>> No. 16024 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:14 am
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I just had a fucking rage hemorrhage while the bloody announcing lady talked over all but 5 seconds of the Utopia outro.

It's kind of irritating when the characters in the show talk over it, never mind someone telling me to watch something I'm already going to watch.
>> No. 16025 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:19 am
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>>16023

Maybe he's mentally unwell.
>> No. 16026 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:19 am
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>outro
This, when used to describe end credits. Or 'intro' to describe an opening sequence.
>> No. 16027 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:23 am
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>>16026

I was using in the context of the track that was playing.

Was that not okay? Teach me to be better.
>> No. 16028 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:25 am
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When everyone else has finished their meal but the one person who hasn't just wants to tell this really long story. Fuck.
>> No. 16029 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:40 am
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People who seem to this that just because they did something, it was the best way not just for them but for others. As an example, I'm currently considering WTF to do with my life and someone whose relation to me I won't mention seems to think that just because they got a job and have done alright in life, I shouldn't bother with education. I can't help but have ambitions and I'm not ready to give up on them yet for a life of working ok-ish jobs.
>> No. 16030 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:58 am
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>>16024

I had this happen last month on one channel, several times. I contacted them expressing my annoyance at having conclusion dialogue of the episodes ruined by the announcer.

They replied within 12 hours, saying they were sorry and that they believed it was a technical error and they hoped it wouldn't happen again. Thus far, it hasn't.
>> No. 16032 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 1:01 am
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>>16030
Nothing can beat the outro of the Kevin Eldon show.
Just loud drilling noises or dogs barking.Easily the only interesting part of the show.
>> No. 16033 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 1:19 am
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>>16029
The speech that was being made was something that kept people on their seats and then this happened.
>> No. 16034 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 1:44 am
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>>16027
Who's talking about your use of it? Why do you always think everything is about you?
>> No. 16035 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 1:46 am
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>>16034

Bit of a stretch from one post to "always."
>> No. 16036 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 6:09 am
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>>16034

I am profoundly arrogant. You pleb.
>> No. 16037 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 12:01 pm
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>>16029
"[Bill Gates/Richard Branson/etc etc] didn't go to university/dropped out and they did fine!"

And before that:

"When ah wu' your age wi'cd just walk aht fr'm school'n' walk int' a job.... bloody lezeh kids these dehs."
>> No. 16038 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 8:38 pm
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Collective nouns. What the fuck is wrong to referring to several associated beasts of any particular species using generic terms such as "group" or "number"? Effective immediately, the collective noun for collective nouns is "clusterfuck".
>> No. 16039 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 8:43 pm
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Chris Graying MP, the worst person in the country is somehow in charge of the entire justice system. The irony.

Also, Asda, why can't I find any combs inside you?
>> No. 16040 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 8:48 pm
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I just want some plain fucking t shirts like pic related but every shop I go into has stupid shit designed for teenagers. I'd buy online but I want to be sure what I'll pay for will fit.
>> No. 16041 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:00 pm
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>>16040
Uniqlo

If you buy online you have two weeks to return, a right you don't have on the street.
>> No. 16042 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:05 pm
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>>16040
High-street places for plain men's t-shirts:

1) Primark
2) H&M
3) Next
4) M&S
5) ASDA

1-2 will probably give you more fitted cuts, 3-5 will give you looser ones with longer sleeves like your picture.

>>16041
What? Most high-street chains have a 28-day return policy.
>> No. 16043 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:07 pm
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>>16042
ASDA have a 100-day policy on clothes.
>> No. 16044 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:10 pm
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>>16042
Does the return policy cover things you just don't like? Anyway, I'm talking about legal rights. You have no right to return shit to h and M store, but you do to their site. Online rights are a lot better than highstreet.
>> No. 16045 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:18 pm
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>>16044

It usually does as long as you haven't taken the tags off, unless you get a cunt on the desk. I don't think there's any legal requirement to give a refund though except for defective or not as advertised goods, e.g. if it has a hole in it.
>> No. 16046 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:20 pm
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>>16044

You can say it's the wrong fit or whatever. Never had an issue.
>> No. 16047 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:21 pm
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>>16045
No, there is online. That's what I mean. You've no legal right to return on the street but online you can return for whatever reason you want within two or four weeks.
>> No. 16048 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 9:43 pm
16048 spacer
>>16044
Yeah, H&M usually have signs up saying something to the tune of "changed your mind? Bring it back with the tags and receipt in resalable condition within 28 days and we'll refund it". I've never had an issue doing this with things I've changed my mind on. You don't have to give a reason at the desk - just be polite and ask if you can return something. Legal rights don't come into it I think, I've found most stores are adopting similar policies just to (I presume) keep their consumers happy. I've even returned a pair of jeans to Republic once because a seam split on a panel the first time I wore them - they exchanged them with the minimum of fuss.

As with most things, being polite and decent to the person on the desk will get you much further than anything else.
>> No. 16049 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 11:28 pm
16049 spacer
>>16042
>1) Primark

Fuck that shit nigga, I've seen that Bangladeshi clothes factory documentary.

I was in M&S today, without success. I've found Next's t-shirts to be flimsy and not 'normal' like in my picture at all. I'll give your other shops a look-in, though.
>> No. 16050 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 11:39 pm
16050 spacer
>>16049

Burton does the type of tops you're after.
>> No. 16051 Anonymous
30th July 2014
Wednesday 11:56 pm
16051 spacer
>>16048

Online, you have an automatic right to cancel an order within 14 days of delivery under the Distance Selling Regulations; It is the retailer's responsibility to pay for return postage.

On or offline, you have an enormous list of rights under various legislation. Most people seriously underestimate their rights as a consumer. There is an excellent summary on the Money Saving Expert website:

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/shopping/consumer-rights-refunds-exchange
>> No. 16052 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 12:11 am
16052 spacer
>>16040

I buy my basics from a wholesaler - you don't have to be a trade customer, you don't have to buy in big quantities and the savings are massive. American Apparel charge £15 for their standard fine jersey t-shirt, but Bar One will sell you exactly the same t-shirt for £7.70 each.

IMO the best t-shirts money can buy are made by Continental/Earthpositive. They're of excellent quality, fair trade certified, and if you pay a little extra for Earthpositive you get certified organic cotton and low-carbon production. FotL Super Premium are pretty good if you prefer a more traditional cut and don't object to pollution and dead Bangladeshis.

http://store.baroneclothing.com/
>> No. 16053 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 12:15 am
16053 spacer

xVe8f1Z.jpg
160531605316053
>>16052
This actually looks perfect for me. Thanks lad.
>> No. 16054 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 12:48 am
16054 spacer
>>16052
> you don't have to buy in big quantities
Is there a minimum amount you have to spend at this place?
>> No. 16055 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 1:46 am
16055 spacer
>>16054

Nope. Postage is a flat £8.95 so you won't want to make a very small order, but there's no minimum order value and they'll sell single quantities of any item.
>> No. 16056 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 6:07 am
16056 YouTube sucks, Vimeo is the best thing ever
ARGH!!!.png
160561605616056
WHY IS THIS A THING!

Even if it's supposed to be a matter of convenience for the user, whereby it seamlessly changes video quality to avoid buffering, why the FUCK does it then gray out half the damned choices afterwards?! IT WAS BUFFERING FUCKING FINE UNTIL YOU CHANGED IT YOUTUBE!

The irony of the YouTube brand name has never been felt more keenly than in this single rage inducing menu.

Sage for OTT swearing.
>> No. 16057 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 9:41 am
16057 spacer
>>16056

Yeh the Auto thing annoys me too. Why can't I just have a cookie that sets it to 360p automatically or something?
>> No. 16058 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 12:54 pm
16058 spacer
>>16057

This pisses me off immensely too. I watch at least ten youtube videos a day, and every single time it sets it to 240p when my computer and internet are more than capable of running them in HD. And I have to set it every single time. Just let me choose in my account, since you force me to fucking log in to everything now.
>> No. 16059 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 1:00 pm
16059 spacer
>>16058

The only semi solution I have from my side, is that I don't have Flash on my WinOS. So I use Firefox for everyday browsing and Chrome if I need something to run Flash. However, more and more YT videos seem to be HTML5 playable.

Thus far, the only quality settings for videos played on HTML5 is 360p and 720p which is perfect for me as my connection will never up to the latter.

I am finding that sometimes the video will freeze (timebar too) however continues to run audio wise.

If you're using NoScript, you'll want to add a permission for googlevideo.com
>> No. 16060 Anonymous
31st July 2014
Thursday 1:03 pm
16060 spacer
>>16056
>>16057
>>16058
>>16059
https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/youtube-high-definition/
>> No. 16062 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 1:46 pm
16062 spacer

1970422_10152553839235272_669505485269779134_n.jpg
160621606216062

>> No. 16063 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 1:58 pm
16063 spacer
>>16062
Ugh. I went to a fancy dress party (not usually my thing but that's for another /101/ moment) where someone was dressed up as a hash. I remember asking in complete incomprehension why you would dress up as a button on a telephone. Apparently she wasn't merely a hash but rather a hashtag.
>> No. 16064 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 2:58 pm
16064 spacer
>>16062
>>16063
Someone has opened a 'sports nutrition' business in Cardiff and called it #GAINZ - every time I pass it I die a little inside.
>> No. 16065 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 3:01 pm
16065 spacer
Speaking of youtube I've found it to be very unresponsive whenever you go to the video list of a channel to the point where my browser hangs for a few seconds.

That and when you select a video from said video list on the channel it's now on a playlist meaning I have to stop the autoplay and more often than not the playlist box will cover the player buttons if youtube centre can't keep up.

While we're on the subject of google owned sites. The new google maps screen is shit and is just as laggy as youtube. The new maps isn't even an improvement on the old one.
>> No. 16066 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 3:07 pm
16066 spacer
>>16065
The only good thing about the new Maps is that it no longer takes you straight in and out of Street View just by scrolling the mouse. That was fucking well annoying.
>> No. 16067 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 3:41 pm
16067 spacer
Oh and another google product:

ReCaptcha

It's illegible, it's broken in some areas (e.g. the numbers captchas which gave you an error even though you typed it correctly), it refreshes itself too quickly. Fucking google ruining everything.
>> No. 16068 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 3:50 pm
16068 spacer
>>16065
Oh yeah the new Google Maps is terrible, I never use it because my machine apparently doesn't have enough RAM to display the fucking thing.

Old Maps is still available at http://www.google.com/local among other places, luckily.
>> No. 16069 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 3:56 pm
16069 spacer
>>16068
The sooner proper browsers get working win64 builds the better. I've had Maps take out my browser from exceeding the process memory limit.
>> No. 16070 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 5:05 pm
16070 spacer
>>16063
> Ugh. I went to a fancy dress #party (not usually my thing but that's for another #/101/ moment) where someone was dressed up as a #hash. I remember asking in complete #incomprehension why you would dress up as a button on a #telephone. Apparently she wasn't merely a hash but rather a #hashtag.

I have altered your post a little so it fits for my /101/ moment too. Thank you.

>>16067
Fucking this. I'd rather close the tab than waste 5 minutes guessing what kind of shite is drawn in that bloody box.
>> No. 16071 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 5:10 pm
16071 spacer
>>16068
I find it's fine on PC but on my modest Android it is fucking shit. Then again even the google search and browser have decided to piss themselves and die recently so maybe it's Sony's fault rather than Google's.
>> No. 16072 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 5:23 pm
16072 spacer
Any kind of talk about admins, mods, etc, on any website.

I can't fucking stand it. It's just the most objectionable kind of sucking up, posters should always just act as if they don't exist, unless the topic actually merits their being mentioned (e.g. concerning site design or whatnot).
>> No. 16073 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 5:28 pm
16073 spacer
>>16072
Nice try, purps.
>> No. 16074 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 5:40 pm
16074 spacer
>>16072

Here, here! What do the mods and admin think about this?
>> No. 16075 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 6:25 pm
16075 spacer
>>16072

I often find that bemoaning what a cunt Maroon is and what a loser puple is adds humour and a sort of self aware parody to most posts that invoke the names of are modz on .gs. I wouldn't change the way we do things here, but I think you have a point with regards to most other sites.
>> No. 16083 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 8:59 pm
16083 spacer
>>16075
>I often find that bemoaning what a cunt Maroon is and what a loser puple is adds humour

Yeah, you're hilarious mate..
>> No. 16084 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 9:02 pm
16084 spacer
>>16083

Oh fuck off purple. It's too early for Maroon yet isn't it?
>> No. 16088 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 10:15 pm
16088 spacer
>>16084

Wrong time of the month m7.
>> No. 16089 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 10:20 pm
16089 spacer
>>16088
Isn't it always Maroon's time of the month?
>> No. 16090 Anonymous
2nd August 2014
Saturday 11:07 pm
16090 spacer
>>16089
Fuck off you utter fucking cunt.

>hey, I'm getting the attention of the admins! I'm a special snowflake! Lol!!

Cunt.
>> No. 16092 Anonymous
3rd August 2014
Sunday 12:23 am
16092 spacer
>>16090

Calm down modlass, we understand.
>> No. 16096 Anonymous
3rd August 2014
Sunday 5:21 pm
16096 spacer

fff.jpg
160961609616096
This is the third time today you've asked me this.

For fucks sake stop. Last time I updated you before waiting a week I had to put up with the latest awful design which I had to revert to something familar.
>> No. 16099 Anonymous
3rd August 2014
Sunday 6:39 pm
16099 spacer
>>16096

There's a theme though. It looks exactly like it used to.
>> No. 16101 Anonymous
3rd August 2014
Sunday 6:59 pm
16101 spacer
>>16099
True, I probably still have it installed but I'm sick of firefox pestering me several times to update my browser.

I only update a week after release for any software (with the exception of updating to resolve a bad patch that was neglected) because shit can and will go wrong. I wouldn't mind if it was only once a day. But I've that "update now" window in the corner and when I close it that window in the other post appears about 15 ish minutes later.
>> No. 16102 Anonymous
3rd August 2014
Sunday 9:07 pm
16102 spacer
>>16096
Look if you don't want to be pestered I'm sure there's a way to switch it off. It's fucking Firefox.
>> No. 16111 Anonymous
5th August 2014
Tuesday 1:37 am
16111 spacer
I didn't watch a film on BBC Three because I thought Owen Wilson was in it, but it turns out it's Luke Wilson, you know, the good one. What a pisser.
>> No. 16112 Anonymous
5th August 2014
Tuesday 9:29 pm
16112 spacer
>>16096
Try Iceweasel instead.
>> No. 16113 Anonymous
6th August 2014
Wednesday 2:16 pm
16113 spacer
Of course all your digs end just as they start to get "really interesting", Time Team. They only last three bloody days, idiots.

Also I just found out Gerald Ford is dead.
>> No. 16114 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 12:32 am
16114 spacer
Work people who go on about their kids.

Especially this one lad, he's foreign - Mediterranean sort, and he has this 2 year old child.

It's all well and good, except he has to bother me ever 2-3 days and show me what fascinating little trivialities his spawn got up to.

His recent amazing wonder, was a shitty blurry picture of his kid reaching to the camera. He proclaimed that it's art, and should be on a cover of something. I normally entertaining him by saying something to acknowledge his time wastage - but this time I silently say back down, while he gawped in a stupefied manner.

Another golden moment was when he filmed his human rodent crawling about on his iPhone (vertically held, per usual) for a whole 4 minutes, and made us watch it right the way through. "oh oh, wait for this funny bit! Wait for it! Nah, you don't get it, you had to be there!"

Fuck off. I don't care about your shit kids, I really don't. You shouldn't be having them if you're that much of a pillock.
>> No. 16115 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 12:38 am
16115 spacer
>>16114
>vertically held, per usual)

If it's just something he's watching on his phone is there an issue with it? I thought the issue was only if you're watching it on YouTube and the like.
>> No. 16116 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 12:39 am
16116 spacer
>>16115

I think he means it was filmed vertically and watched horizontally.
>> No. 16117 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 12:55 am
16117 spacer
>>16114
Inappropriate conversations when talking to strangers or acquaintances.

There was this bloke who I had only known a week who was telling me how (keyword here) he was trying to conceive with his wife. I'm no prude when it comes to certain topics but I draw the line at the topic being insemination when I've only known a person for a week.

That and going to the barbers and the girl asking me if I've got kids Yeah sure I've got a few handcuffed in the van, dohohoho when I'm still pretty sure I'm still young enough to not have them. There's also other awkward questions but ultimately it just makes me look like a manchild. No I've not got kids, I don't have a wife, I don't have a girlfriend, I've not got any plans for the weekend as I'm on the dole and live with my parents. Here's the money, see you in three months, I'll say that but I'll actually come back in 6 months in the hopes you've forgotten me even more so we can restart the charade.

I think I have issues
>> No. 16118 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 1:00 am
16118 spacer
>>16116
Exactly, he recorded it and I forgot to mention, he uploaded it to his laptop. Sorry for the confusion.

>>16117
Don't think you're that strange, being asked weird shit is unnecessary and presumptuous. It makes me especially uncomfortable when an office LAD would ask me who has the best tits and arse - usually asked by the Mediterranean lad.
>> No. 16119 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 1:30 am
16119 spacer
Recent issue with me

Trying to set up university accommodation and the uni's accommodation account system refuses to make an account. So I emailed them and ask what the fuck is up. Now here's where the /101/ comes in.

I emailed them in June. I've emailed over the course of from then to now about 4 times why it hasn't been sorted. Same response "system error, had to forward it to IT". Going by the last email they're getting fairly annoyed and they think I'm inpatient which boils my piss because I have been very patient but now I've got a month left before I'm going. System error is the sort of vague excuse I'd use when I didn't know what's wrong and wouldn't know how to fix it. Going to give them a ring tomorrow. This is the /101/ in my life: when something that should be simple is delayed whenever I use the opportunity to get shit done early. Can be related to Christmas shopping. I always say I'd get presents before the end of the first week of December but something always messes up those plans.
>> No. 16120 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 6:28 am
16120 spacer
>>16119
Ring them. You'll soon learn that if you want something to be dealt with then a call is far better than repeated chaser emails.
>> No. 16121 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 1:31 pm
16121 spacer
>>16120
This. The only thing more effective is turning up in person. They can't forward you on or put you on hold. Especially if you're holding an extendable socket wrench.
>> No. 16122 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 3:20 pm
16122 spacer
>>16120>>16121
I'll have to call them tomorrow as I have something else to attend to today but I still don't understand how phone calls can get shit done when emails can't. I figure they're going to say the same thing no matter polite or how irate I sound on the phone but from past experience it has always helped. Doesn't help I become a stuttering autismal mess over the phone.

On a slightly related note I just learned my conditional offer has become an unconditional and confirmed offer just today after checking my ucas. Didn't get a fucking email about it yet though.

sage for /uni/
>> No. 16123 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 3:49 pm
16123 spacer
>>16122

If they change your offer you have to set it as your firm choice again. It happened to me last month. I thought I'd lost my place.
>> No. 16124 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 9:06 pm
16124 spacer
The ad for the BBC Three twitter shit at the bottom of the screen blocking the caption.

Also the show looks wank so far.
>> No. 16125 Anonymous
7th August 2014
Thursday 10:17 pm
16125 spacer
>>16124

I'm continuing this moan because Our War was actually a little unpleasant. The advancing German lines are displayed as a burnt black wilderness led by a wall of flames, a little unfair I thought. Especially because they kept pointing out the Germans were all conscripts, but only it seemed to make clear just how shit they were, not that they're "shops boys and office clerks", no no, none of that.

Also it was trying it's hardest to look like a video game, going so far as to have overhead shots in a FLIR visual style, à la CoD.

Yeah, anyway a sophomoric, biased, action movie wearing a cap with "history" written on it.
>> No. 16126 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 8:33 am
16126 spacer
Why does YouTube always stick these fucking MineCraft videos as the top left 'recommendation'? I don't play it, I don't like it, I've never watched one. And while we're at it, can I maybe never see a PewDeePie one there again too?
>> No. 16127 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 9:48 am
16127 spacer
>>16126
Because it's run by cunts that know the majority of viewers are bored teenagers. If you think about it that way, a lot of YT makes sense.
>> No. 16128 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 9:53 am
16128 spacer
It's not just me, is it? YouTube does just get shitter and shitter as time wears on.
>> No. 16129 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 10:16 am
16129 spacer
>>16126
They're smelling what's selling.
>> No. 16130 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 2:08 pm
16130 spacer
>>16126>>16127>>16128
Funny that these complaints flood in when youtube centre breaks.

Base youtube is so fucking terrible, I'd forgotten how bad it was.
>> No. 16131 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 2:26 pm
16131 spacer

nope.png
161311613116131
>>16130
Could it be that people are blocking tracking methods/not signing in and then blaming YouTube for the consequences of their own actions?
>> No. 16132 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 2:35 pm
16132 spacer
>>16130

I don't even know what "YouTube centre" is tbh.

>>16131

Nope, it's that YouTube stutters and burbs out force 360p videos for no good reason. I mean, why can every wanksite known to man utilise a perfectly functional media player, while the biggest video streaming site in the world can barely decide on a user friendly UI.
>> No. 16133 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 2:36 pm
16133 spacer
>>16131
Fuck me, that recommended section looks scarily like my own.
>> No. 16134 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 2:45 pm
16134 spacer
>>16132
Youtube centre is an add on that makes youtube tolerable and customizable. It broke last night but I use it primarily for subscription grids, dynamic thumbnails and auto 720p.

Doesn't fix how unoptimized the whole site is. I'd even say there are porn sites that offer more functionality than that largest video streaming site in the world.
>> No. 16135 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 3:01 pm
16135 spacer
>>16134
>>16132
And everyone else complaining about the resolution on youtube:
see
>>16060
>> No. 16136 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 3:07 pm
16136 spacer

2014-08-08_15h07_35.png
161361613616136
>>16135
This is what it does
>> No. 16137 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 3:23 pm
16137 spacer
>>16135
>>16136

Is there an alternative for Chrome? Some of us (probably just me) are security conscious to the point where we'll use Firefox for every day browsing and then Chrome for anything that has to use Flash. Because if you have Java, Adobe, Flash and especially Shockwave on your computer and it gets compromised, I have 0 sympathy.
>> No. 16139 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 3:25 pm
16139 spacer
>>16137
https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/auto-hd-for-youtube/koiaokdomkpjdgniimnkhgbilbjgpeak
https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/improvedtube-youtube-exte/bnomihfieiccainjcjblhegjgglakjdd?hl=en
https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/magic-actions-for-youtube/abjcfabbhafbcdfjoecdgepllmpfceif?hl=en
>> No. 16140 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 3:25 pm
16140 spacer
>>16139

Will check them out, thanks!
>> No. 16141 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 3:57 pm
16141 spacer
>>16126
Pah. I'd rather have MineCraft than some sort of shitty degenerate cartoon. It irks my eyes and my sanity.
>> No. 16142 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 9:29 pm
16142 spacer

lady_with_umbrella_by_dannyst-d3c7sfh[1].jpg
161421614216142
Short people with umbrellas.

These little fuckers are eye poking machines. An average height woman with an umbrella is a menace, there should be a law against it.
>> No. 16143 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 9:35 pm
16143 spacer
>>16142

Don't worry, in the United Caliphate of the Muslamic Republic of Britain and Northern Ireland women won't be allowed out unless a man is with them. It won't be long now.
>> No. 16144 Anonymous
8th August 2014
Friday 9:38 pm
16144 spacer
>>16142
They're worse in queues.

They aren't too fond of you huddling under their umbrella either.
>> No. 16145 Anonymous
9th August 2014
Saturday 12:11 am
16145 spacer
Mud. Rain. Constant clamminess. BO. Chemical toilets. Under 18 year olds on drugs. Under 18 year olds all called Portia on drugs.
>> No. 16146 Anonymous
9th August 2014
Saturday 12:29 am
16146 spacer
>>16145
Where's this mate? Do you touch the under 18 year olds called Portia?
>> No. 16147 Anonymous
9th August 2014
Saturday 2:22 am
16147 spacer
Meats sold as "Use by X/Y" but already stink / are rotten as of X/Y. I've suffered from two pack as thus this month alone. Whine.
>> No. 16148 Anonymous
9th August 2014
Saturday 2:33 am
16148 spacer
>>16145

Alright, calm down Renton.
>> No. 16149 Anonymous
9th August 2014
Saturday 9:19 am
16149 spacer
In todays episode of Shit My YouTube Does it's decided to run videos in complete silence and at double speed. Another for 6 right there, YouTube, top quality work.
>> No. 16150 Anonymous
9th August 2014
Saturday 10:15 am
16150 spacer
>>16149

Just hum Benny Hill and you'll be golden.
>> No. 16151 Anonymous
9th August 2014
Saturday 12:50 pm
16151 spacer
>>16150
In my bleary-eyed state I read that as 'Just bum Benny Hill'.
>> No. 16161 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 5:56 am
16161 spacer
Is there a bigger cunt in the world than someone who posts a tech problem then replies with "never mind, I fixed it" and doesn't say how?

http://www.unix.com/unix-for-dummies-questions-and-answers/36485-can-you-limit-compare-comm-command.html
>> No. 16162 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 6:25 am
16162 spacer
>>16151

So did I. I was just about to hover over the link to get the context but I saw your reply first.
>> No. 16163 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 6:30 am
16163 spacer

shh-make-yourself-silent-film-character-for-hallow.jpg
161631616316163
>>16149

They should have also made them black and white, with orchestra music and periodically threw up these.
>> No. 16164 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 8:28 am
16164 spacer
>>16150>>16163

It doesn't really gel when you're watching coverage of Gaza though.
>> No. 16165 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 12:24 pm
16165 spacer
>>16164

I'd have to reserve judgement until I'd actually seen it.

https://www.youtube.com/v/2AYujWCCHRk
>> No. 16167 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 12:52 pm
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11111.png
161671616716167
I DON'T FUCKING CARE
>> No. 16168 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 12:54 pm
16168 spacer
People who use Facebook.
>> No. 16169 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 12:57 pm
16169 spacer
>>16167
Some friend you are then.
>> No. 16170 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 12:59 pm
16170 spacer
>>16169
If I was good enough friends with you I'd say happy birthday to you in person, not dump some stupid message on facebook on your 'wall'.
>> No. 16172 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 1:00 pm
16172 spacer
>>16167
Have you considered where clicking the Settings link may take you?
>> No. 16173 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 1:02 pm
16173 spacer
>>16172
Excellent, cheers much.
>> No. 16174 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 1:42 pm
16174 spacer
>>16170

Why even have them on FB if you can't be arsed to type a solitary sentence to possibly brighten their day from hearing from you? Just delete them, you coward. You are a /101/ thread all to yourself.

I had lost contact with a friend for years and they added me on my birthday a few years ago and we got talking and now we are engaged. Facebook isn't just solely banalbook wank, you know? My birthday was just her in to spark up a convo. She asked me if I was doing anything and I said I was going to the pub and she came, imagine that!

Who would have thought FB was a social network.
>> No. 16176 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 4:44 pm
16176 spacer
Old films where people don't bleed when they die. Looks silly.

>>16174

You won't be so enthusiastic when Zuckerberg has your brain in a cupboard in his ITZ bunker. You poor, gullible, bastard, waddling to your end like a doped up lemming in a Disney film.

Props on your engagement though! :D

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 16177 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 4:45 pm
16177 spacer
>>16174
Oh, I bet she came.
>> No. 16178 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 4:47 pm
16178 spacer
>>16175

How many times do you need to be banned before you stop putting emotes in your posts?

After the first time you must have realised that it isn't acceptable on here, yet you continue to do it.
>> No. 16180 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 5:30 pm
16180 spacer
>>16178
Well look who's arrived to cheer everyone up. I think I'll spend the rest of my Sunday somewhere other than .gs.
>> No. 16181 Anonymous
10th August 2014
Sunday 6:16 pm
16181 spacer
>>16180

There is a god.
>> No. 16193 Anonymous
11th August 2014
Monday 7:32 pm
16193 spacer
Is it just me, or is Juicy Fruit not as juicy as it used to be?
>> No. 16195 Anonymous
11th August 2014
Monday 7:57 pm
16195 spacer
>>16193
It's not as fruity as it used to be too.
>> No. 16197 Anonymous
11th August 2014
Monday 8:28 pm
16197 spacer
>>16195
Well I'd argue the fruitiness is directly correlated with the juiciness, hence the name of the flavour being Juicy Fruit. It's not called 'Fruit with Juice'.
>> No. 16198 Anonymous
11th August 2014
Monday 8:29 pm
16198 spacer
>>16193
They never are.
>> No. 16201 Anonymous
12th August 2014
Tuesday 9:48 pm
16201 spacer
Incredible shitlordery on behalf of my soundcard driver.

In the past week or so, my computer has been sluggish at best, games would have no audio, audio would decide to stop working, youtube videos would crash, closing steam would make the audio stop working, speaker crackle, all of this bollockry.

I lashed out at my poor graphics card as it was the only thing that has been installed recently, and it may have had a role in this. Instead, it was the bloody soundcard, thanks RealTek, you utter cunts.

To make matters worse, you can't even get a proper update for the driver, you need to trawl through some czech site for driver updates. What a poor show.
>> No. 16202 Anonymous
12th August 2014
Tuesday 9:52 pm
16202 spacer
>>16201
My onboard sound card was a realtek IIRC. I had so many issues with it I decided to get a proper sound card. I had the same issue as you, the drivers were shit and outdated.

It fixed the issue but it meant less space in the case to the point where I'd have to remove it and the graphics card just to access the drive bay and front panel connectors.
>> No. 16203 Anonymous
12th August 2014
Tuesday 11:03 pm
16203 spacer
>>16202
At least you have luxury of swapping out your sound card, I don't know if it's that easy in a laptop.

I have no idea how someone could pass off this excuse of a sound card, the software is a joke, the millions of useless pre-sets make my mind boggle. Who cares if you can make your speakers sound like their in a cave, when you can even tell it to update?
>> No. 16204 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 12:46 am
16204 spacer
>>16203
You can buy USB soundcards/DACs.
>> No. 16205 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 3:28 pm
16205 spacer
>>16202>>16201
Pretty similar shite I had. And that was when I had no internet access.

Luckily, somebody put a more recent driver on the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. DVD (yes, that was so many moons ago). Bless that soul.
>> No. 16206 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 10:03 pm
16206 spacer
The word "shitlord".

For fuck's sake just stop it. It just sounds like an immature attempt to imitate more subtle, and sophisticated, swear-combinations such as "arse badger".
>> No. 16207 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 10:09 pm
16207 spacer
>>16206
Shut the fuck up, cuntfoot.
>> No. 16208 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 10:10 pm
16208 spacer
>>16206
What about 'fuck face'?
>> No. 16211 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 10:19 pm
16211 spacer
>>16208

Fuck face is a classic.

I believe "shitlord" irritates me primarily because it has become some kind of insider term for the most tiresome of Tumblr/Reddit wannabe lefties who have no idea what they are talking about. Much like how if somebody says "oy vey" you can reasonably assume they are Jewish, if someone says "shitlord" you can reasonably assume they are the kind of cunt who thinks fat shaming is a real thing.
>> No. 16213 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 10:53 pm
16213 spacer
>>16211

I find myself using oy vey in everyday speech now because of chronic internet exposure. I'm not Jewish.

This is a cautionary tale kids, stay away from the internet.
>> No. 16214 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 11:16 pm
16214 spacer
>>16211
>Tumblr/Reddit wannabe lefties who have no idea what they are talking about
This type of comment is really getting on my nerves, and not because I think those sites are some kinds of forums of boundless enlightenment, but because of what it says about this site.

Just because you don't understand what they are talking about doesn't mean they don't. I mean what is 'fat shaming isn't real' supposed to mean? People don't take the piss out of fat people, then? Christ.
>> No. 16215 Anonymous
13th August 2014
Wednesday 11:25 pm
16215 spacer

fat_pride2.jpg
162151621516215
>>16214
Of course people take the piss out of fat people. We take the piss out of everyone, for everything. Doesn't mean we don't like you.

What we don't like are attention whores like pic related.
>> No. 16216 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 6:11 am
16216 spacer
>>16215
How does using the word shitlord imply that someone is somehow a "wannabe lefty"? What the fuck even is a wannabe lefty?

Sage for not actually caring.
>> No. 16217 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 6:32 am
16217 spacer
Nice to see that /101/ is becoming reddit.

not serious
>> No. 16218 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 7:26 am
16218 New to this debate please no shouting
>>16216

"Wannabe lefty" is a silly term, yes. However, when someone who in all likelihood defines themselves as left wing goes around being proud of what swollen, greedy, first worlder with a calorific intake Cameroonian villagers would gain weight just thinking about, I do sort of want to stab them to death with a bayonet while "The Internationale" plays on a phonograph. Usually I just laugh it off though.

I'm also aware that these people exist in such small numbers that you basically have to seek them out to get upset by them.
>> No. 16220 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 7:54 am
16220 spacer
Someone I went to school with has just got back from a holiday to Mexico. They must have spent at least an hour each day on Facebook while over there and now they're complaining that they've racked up a >£300 phone bill.
>> No. 16221 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 8:19 am
16221 spacer
>>16216
I never said anything about the word shitlord, different poster.
>> No. 16222 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:17 am
16222 spacer
>>16220
How much of a twat do you need to be to spend your holiday on Facebook? It's something my sister does whenever there's one of those extortionately priced coin-operated computer/web thingies.
>> No. 16223 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:22 am
16223 spacer
>>16222

>one of those extortionately priced coin-operated computer/web thingies.

I have no idea what that is, please explain.
>> No. 16225 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:29 am
16225 spacer
>>16223
Basically a coin-operated computer that has access to the internet. They are mega expensive, something like £1 per 10 minutes or less. You find them near hotel receptions, and in airports, they tend to be fading away as more people have wifi on their phones.
>> No. 16226 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:33 am
16226 spacer
>>16225
What about making you spend £1/hr to access the wifi like they do in Stansted?
>> No. 16228 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:39 am
16228 spacer
>>16226
Well thats how they've evolved really, obviously they're going to capitalize on people want to access the local wifi. At the East Midlands Airport, wifi is free, and you even have access to plug sockets, which is extremely rare.
>> No. 16229 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:45 am
16229 spacer
>>16225

Uh, I'm missing out on so much. I really need to travel abroad, or just go to an airport.
>> No. 16230 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 11:19 am
16230 spacer
>>16229
Dear God. No. There's nothing more I hate than airports.
>> No. 16231 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 11:53 am
16231 spacer
>>16222
The whole point of going on holiday is to let other people know you're going on holiday. Nobody goes on holiday because they actually want a holiday, they just want to tell other people they're going on holiday. Why do you think nobody in the history of the world has ever gone on holiday without ever talking about it either before or afterwards? Why do you think cameras were invented?
>> No. 16232 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 2:18 pm
16232 spacer
>>16231
I must be an exception then, because I couldn't give a toss about who knows and who doesn't - I take a camera to take pictures for myself, - never upload them onto FB.
>> No. 16233 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 3:18 pm
16233 spacer
>>16206
I like that word.
>>16232
It's called irony, m7.
>> No. 16234 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 5:06 pm
16234 spacer
>>16233

I thought irony was sarcasm?

And what's a "sardonic"?

Is "party" a verb?
>> No. 16235 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 5:09 pm
16235 spacer
>>/v/17319
>a journal
This pissed me off in my degree because I'm both an autist and a cunt. "I read a journal last night", "I found a few journals about it", "I downloaded a journal".
You mean either article or paper. Nobody reads a full journal, most of it will be shite.

Sorry to the OP of that thread, I'm sure you're lovely.
>> No. 16236 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 5:14 pm
16236 spacer
>>16235

I wanted to say the same thing but decided against shitting up one of the decent boards with such an inane observation. Your solution is brilliant and I'll be using it in future.
>> No. 16237 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 5:21 pm
16237 spacer
>>16220
>>16222
An hour doesn't sound like a huge amount in the scheme of things. If that's how you relax, then that's how you relax, so fair play to them.

It's like complaining about people going on holiday and then spending an hour every day in the hotel swimming pool, because there are leisure centres where they live.
>> No. 16238 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 7:49 pm
16238 spacer
>>16214

> I mean what is 'fat shaming isn't real' supposed to mean?

I know what they are on about, I just happen to believe they are just fucking morons. There's a difference.

That fat people should rightly be ashamed, because they are unhealthy and detrimental to the health of society as a whole? The concept of fat shaming is the idea that people are horrible meanies who make fat people feel bad about themselves, and that society should be nicer and wrap everyone up in cotton wool so that their feelings don't get hurt while they go about their lives in whatever way they please. It is the idea that one's own lack of self esteem is entirely unrelated to a lack of willpower or self control and that fat people are victims of society's cruelty (just like black people and homosexuals.)

I'm sorry, but no, you fat cunt. Fuck off and do some exercise, and stop trying to blame your own problems on everyone around you.

I can't help but suspect you of being a Tumblr/Reddit user, and also possibly a middle class university student, yourself.
>> No. 16239 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 8:00 pm
16239 spacer
>>16232
I can guarantee that in the past month you've partaken in the following conversation at work:

HELLO TRACEY, I HAVE JUST GOT BACK FROM MY HOLIDAY TO KOS. I AM ALREADY PLANNING MY HOLIDAY FOR A LITTLE WINTER SUN IN SKIATHOS, ALL INCLUSIVE SO DARREN AND I CAN GET BLADDERED EVERY NIGHT. I LOVE HOLIDAYS, ME. IT WAS FUCKING HOT.

HELLO JULIE, I ALSO LOVE HOLIDAYS. I AM GOING ON HOLIDAY NEXT WEEK, TO TORREMOLINOS. I HOPE IT IS SHIT HOT AND I GET A RIGHT GOOD TAN. I HAVE MY BIKINI BODY ALL READY. I HAVE BEEN GOOD AND EATING THE SHAPERS MEAL DEAL FROM BOOTS.

POOR ANGIE IS ONLY GOING ON HOLIDAY TO CORNWALL.

POOR ANG, IF YOU DONT GO ABROAD AT LEAST ONCE A YEAR THEN YOU'RE POOR.

POOR, POOR ANG.

And so on and so forth. It's like football talk.
>> No. 16240 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 8:12 pm
16240 spacer
>>16221
Ah apologies. Serves me right for making assumptions on an anonymous imageboard.

Sage for pointless post.
>> No. 16241 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 8:19 pm
16241 spacer
>>16239

But Greece is full of Neo-Nazis and Cornwall's just full of... well they're racists but they aren't fascistic about it.
>> No. 16244 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 9:59 pm
16244 spacer
>>16231
Would you go on a free holiday if all memories of it would be wiped at the end?

Corollary: would you take a drug that gives you false happy memories (and erased memory of taking said drug)?
>> No. 16245 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:17 pm
16245 spacer
>>16244
In my more /boo moments I sometimes convince myself this drug has already been invented, and we like to call it alcohol.
>> No. 16246 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 10:53 pm
16246 spacer
I hate how expensive consumer goods are in Britain. I was looking for a particular model of motorbike boots: the nearest brick and mortar shop had them for £350, and the cheapest UK mail order place had them for £320. I ended up ordering them from Germany for £230 including shipping. Maybe I'm just economically illiterate and there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for why consumer goods are so expensive here.
>> No. 16247 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 11:17 pm
16247 spacer
>>16246

Probably just because of several taxes along the way of getting them here, depending on where they are manufactured, with VAT on top. A good illustration is in the difference in price of UK made instruments and amplifiers etc versus their American equivalents, and then the Korean/Taiwanese/Wherever budget lines made by the same companies.

I don't understand why the pound being more valuable than most other currencies doesn't take the edge off, though. Any economicslad here to explain?
>> No. 16249 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 11:18 pm
16249 spacer
>>16246
>there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for why consumer goods are so expensive here.

Rent prices? Tax?

I'm not sure either, but one thing that struck me was how outdoor shop employees would quietly tell me to go online and shop for good as theirs were so over-priced they felt guilty conning students and the sort. Only rich folk going for their twice a year hikes in the alps would get the full retail price treatment.
>> No. 16251 Anonymous
14th August 2014
Thursday 11:57 pm
16251 spacer
>>16249
>Rent prices?
Commercial rents aren't anywhere near as out of control as residential rents. Empty homes are mostly just sat there doing nothing, while empty commercial properties (especially in central locations) tend to be on the market going begging. Indeed, shop fronts are in plentiful supply, both in and out of town. Anyone who wanted to open a competing business and could sell cheaper would find themselves with plenty of choice of location.

>Tax?
Payable all over the EU. As an EU national buying goods from an EU state, you'd have had to pay the German equivalent of VAT on that purchase anyway.
>> No. 16253 Anonymous
15th August 2014
Friday 1:01 am
16253 spacer
>>16246

German companies do a very good job of trading across the whole of the EU, which gives them immense buying power, especially in niche markets. The example that springs to mind is the music equipment retailer Thomann - they advertise in pretty much every guitar and music tech magazine in Europe and singlehandedly buy more stock than most EU countries. They're almost always significantly cheaper than their rivals, even in a market with relatively very thin margins.

Operating from a base in the south of Germany allows them to dispatch next-day to most of Europe from a single warehouse, and German school leavers tend to be multilingual. They can run their businesses at a lower cost and haggle more aggressively with suppliers, allowing them to compete with or undercut pretty much everyone and still turn a decent profit. It costs a bit more to ship parcels across EU borders, but again they can negotiate aggressively due to their size and they're located close to the EU logistics hubs of most parcel delivery companies.
>> No. 16261 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 3:17 am
16261 spacer
People on various online communities (like this one, 4chan or wherever else) who talk about fetishes and kinks and some fucker who says "I DON'T UNDERSTAND x FETISH". Strangely it always comes up with foot fetishes and cuckolding.

Same thing when someone says "how can you have a phobia of x" not understanding the irrational part of a phobia.
>> No. 16264 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 1:11 pm
16264 spacer
You know that feeling you get when you want to call someone a really horrid name, and it's all you can do not have some kind of emotional hernia?

I hate that.
>> No. 16267 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 2:15 pm
16267 spacer
>>16249
I'm no economist but I can only assume our island status (both literally and figuratively with ARE NIGE's way of thinking) has contributed to a less competetive market place. Getting something sent to you from another mainland EU country is hardly any different from having it sent from your own and if the saving is big enough you could just jump in your car and drive accross the border to get cheaper goods easy as anything.

Obviously we can participate in the larger EU market to some extent but the additional cost/difficulty of taking the channel tunnel and common 'little Englander' mentality provide some resistance to price equilibration.

That and I'm sure the pound/euro thing has something to do with it but now you're getting into proper bean-counter territory.
>> No. 16268 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 5:33 pm
16268 spacer
One of my friends now lives in Australia and she keeps referring to Britain as 'across the pond'.
>> No. 16275 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 7:59 pm
16275 spacer
>>16268

The lack of geographical knowledge some people have is terrifying to me.
>> No. 16277 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 8:01 pm
16277 spacer

world_according_to_americans_large.png
162771627716277
>>16275
>> No. 16278 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 8:02 pm
16278 spacer
>>16275
I like it. If ITZ happened, they would be so dependant on me. I would do naughty things to them, or else I would abandon them.
>> No. 16281 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 8:17 pm
16281 spacer
>>16275
My geographical knowledge of the UK is pretty poor, but I put it down to not having been to enough places (at least not independantly such that I'm actually paying attention to where the fuck I am).

On a sidenote, anyone else find it annoying how drivers always talk to non-drivers (well me at least) about road directions? So rather than saying 'yeah it's about 100 miles north-north east of here' I'll get a long rambling account of how you take the M298 up to the A32.9 before shimmying over to take junction 25A on the interstellar information highway. You're speaking gobledegook to me mate and you full well know it.
>> No. 16284 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 10:53 pm
16284 spacer

ALoad.png
162841628416284
Oh, right then. However, I am being reassured that "Skype just got better", so that's a plus. There's new "features" too!

>>16281

Uh, road talk, what a great load of crap. Did you not hear something interesting on the radio while you were taking the B266 through Gullshaven-Upon-Ribble? No of course not, you've been listening to the same Olly Murs CD for 3 years. God, people are awful.

>>16278

Do you mean within Britain? Sure no one will care where Canada is in relation to Ecuador once Janus hits?
>> No. 16286 Anonymous
16th August 2014
Saturday 11:53 pm
16286 spacer
>>16284
Within Britain of course. I would aid the lad who doesn't know how roads work to get to his destination, after a very positive experience.
>> No. 16289 Anonymous
17th August 2014
Sunday 3:30 pm
16289 spacer
>>16261
Thank you. I do always forget about the irrational aspect of that.
>> No. 16290 Anonymous
17th August 2014
Sunday 4:47 pm
16290 spacer
People who ask you to do something difficult, only to tell you not to worry when you've nearly completed the task.
>> No. 16295 Anonymous
18th August 2014
Monday 1:25 pm
16295 spacer
I hate people who can't cope with road speak. It's the fastest and most efficient form of directioning there is, and unless you are blind it's not hard to know which road you are on. It's even part of the driving test nowadays to be able to read fucking signs. It's not hard.

Every time I have to tell someone "Oh, it's just off the motorway; if you come off at junction one then it's your third exit on the roundabout." then they reply with something like "Oooh I don't know that side of town much... Is it near the football stadium?" I feel like shouting at them. JUST GO ON THE FUCKING MOTORWAY AND TAKE THE JUNCTION THAT SAYS NUMBER FUCKING ONE. YOU DON'T HAVE TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THAT PART OF TOWN. IT'S A FUCKING NUMBER FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.
>> No. 16296 Anonymous
18th August 2014
Monday 10:13 pm
16296 spacer
My Virgin Media bill is going up by £1.50 as of October 1st. Cunts.
>> No. 16297 Anonymous
18th August 2014
Monday 11:39 pm
16297 spacer
>>16296
My interest rate on my savings account is going down by .30% in October.
>> No. 16298 Anonymous
18th August 2014
Monday 11:45 pm
16298 spacer
>>16297

Absolutely abhorrent. Have you considered writing a strongly worded letter?
>> No. 16299 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 12:21 am
16299 spacer
>>16295
Why are you involved with these people who apparently still don't have GPS devices?
>> No. 16300 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 12:22 am
16300 spacer
>>16295
You can't really get much more efficient than saying 'x miles in y direction' lad.

Besides, it's more the fact that drivers seem to have no self awareness that they're making no sense to anyone who doesn't take regular trips around Britain's largest carpark. It's like if you asked me directions and I started telling you about bus routes and train times - meaningless if you don't regular use either of these things.
>> No. 16302 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 12:38 am
16302 spacer
>>16299
Where will you be when SHTF and ITZ and all that catapults us back to the stone age? Stuck in the foetal position, desperately clutching your TomTom, waiting for it to work again, after having finally reached Asda to find its shelves bare because all the smart folk just headed for junction 30 on the M4 and looted it before you were anywhere near it.

That said, the best set of directions I've ever heard was this:
>Yeah, head north out of Oslo and on the third day turn left. You can't miss it; it's the only left turn on the third day.
>> No. 16303 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 12:39 am
16303 spacer
>>16302

Liverpool fan?
>> No. 16304 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 12:44 am
16304 spacer
>>16302
The m6 isn't going to disappear because of shtf lad.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 16305 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 1:00 am
16305 spacer
>>16304

No; but we may well be laying strips of red deer (if not venison) in its empty car pool lane, while others stalk Pigeons (if not Elk) around the ruins of Canary Wharf. Or so we can dream.
>> No. 16306 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 1:54 am
16306 spacer
>>16299

My place of work is a reasonably popular destination and as such I regularly receive telephone calls requesting directions. Given that it is immediately next to a motorway, and not much else of note, I do tend to assume people will be driving to get there.

>>16300

If I'm giving someone directions on foot I tend to keep it in the context of landmarks and how many turns you must pass before taking one, that seems easiest. But if I'm talking to someone who I know will be driving, damn right I speak to them in road-ese, because there's utterly no excuse for them not to understand it.

On the other hand, I can't begin to describe how unfathomably useless a simple bearing and distance is to anybody attempting to navigate modern Britain. You can't walk in a straight line for more than fifty feet in this country.
>> No. 16307 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 12:35 pm
16307 spacer
>>16305
The M6 doesn't have a sodding car pool lane.
>> No. 16308 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 2:11 pm
16308 spacer
>>16307
woosh
>> No. 16309 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 2:12 pm
16309 spacer
>>16308

Is a sound you don't hear on the M6.
>> No. 16310 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 10:07 pm
16310 spacer
The BBC Three show "Sexy Beasts".

Well, not really the show, but the fact that I like it.

Also, if I watch it long enough I might figure out how humans work. Cutting them open wasn't getting me anywhere.
>> No. 16311 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 10:14 pm
16311 spacer
>>16310

Oh, that's why I like it. It uses music from The Thing score.
>> No. 16312 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 10:15 pm
16312 spacer
>>16310
I watched the first 10 minutes but that I LOVE BEING RANDUMB hint annoyed me too much.
>> No. 16313 Anonymous
19th August 2014
Tuesday 10:22 pm
16313 spacer
>>16312

I FUCKING KNOW RIGHT!? She just asked him if he'd rather eat chocolate flavored shit or shit flavored chocolate, FFS.

Did you see the Venezuelan lady he turned down? She was the most attractive person in the world, and now he's dating a mad cat woman and some LOL SO RANDUM moop.
>> No. 16314 Anonymous
20th August 2014
Wednesday 8:49 pm
16314 spacer
I've just had the misfortune of being in Liverpool, and there's a veritable humanitarian crisis going on. The city is suffering a desperate shortage of consonants. Seriously, if you hear two women trying to talk to each other you might as well be watching The Clangers.
>> No. 16318 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 7:29 pm
16318 spacer
Why are Arabs so shouty? Whenever an Arab spokesperson is on the news they shout, completely regardless of how upset/angry they are.

Is it a linguistic or cultural thing? I'd imagine one of the reasons for there being so many conflicts in the area is that, that near constant level of ire has probably turned many a heated debate into a civil war.

Hmm, that all sounded a bit racist, didn't it?
>> No. 16319 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 7:36 pm
16319 spacer
>>16318
Don't worry, I'll put something even more racist in another thread so you don't look as bad.
>> No. 16321 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 7:48 pm
16321 spacer
>>16319
You weren't kidding.
>> No. 16325 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 9:01 pm
16325 spacer
>>16319

Err, thanks, I guess.
>> No. 16326 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 9:01 pm
16326 spacer
>>16318

The Greeks are a pretty passionate people too and their general level of volume is much higher than what you'd have your ears adjusted to for Blighty decibel levels.

I remember often overhearing 2 Greek people "talking" and being completely unable to discern whether one had just walked in on the other screwing the next door neighbour or if they were casually exchanging a tomato sauce recipe.

Sage as I think I may have posted the exact same thing here before.
>> No. 16327 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 9:03 pm
16327 spacer
>>16326
Italians are pretty similar too.
>> No. 16328 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 9:24 pm
16328 spacer
>>16327
WATSA MATTA WIT U?
>> No. 16330 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 9:45 pm
16330 spacer
>>16328
Now you've got this in me bonce.

https://www.youtube.com/v/sFacWGBJ_cs
>> No. 16331 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 9:55 pm
16331 spacer

PNODhwz.jpg
163311633116331
>>16321
Of course I wasn't kidding. I'm a madman.
>> No. 16332 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 9:56 pm
16332 spacer
Basically everyone south of Vienna is an obnoxious tit then?
>> No. 16336 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 10:39 pm
16336 spacer
>>16332

Many of the people north of Vienna also.
>> No. 16337 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 10:42 pm
16337 spacer
>>16330
AH SHADDAP YOU FACE
>> No. 16340 Anonymous
21st August 2014
Thursday 11:40 pm
16340 spacer
>>16337
Bada-da-boopie? Bida da bapo!
>> No. 16362 Anonymous
23rd August 2014
Saturday 10:27 am
16362 spacer
Little bastard flies that keep landing on my feet. Fuck off you cunts, I've opened 2 windows, you're free now. Piss off.
>> No. 16363 Anonymous
23rd August 2014
Saturday 10:30 am
16363 spacer
>>16362
And my hands. At least they're not going for the face though. Speaks volumes about my mug.
>> No. 16364 Anonymous
23rd August 2014
Saturday 12:13 pm
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>>16362
Yeah you think you're in pain I've had two flies fly into my eye and die there within the last week. I don't know if my eyeballs are like bullseyes to them but my eye still really hurts.
>> No. 16365 Anonymous
23rd August 2014
Saturday 5:17 pm
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Why do people make high end movies/series and then film large parts of them in the dark? I just finished watching the new Godzilla and I couldn't see a lot of it. The occasionally flash of light is not sufficient. FFS, they could have had moon light. I remember being equally annoyed when watcing The Pacific. What's the point? [x] Whinge.
>> No. 16381 Anonymous
25th August 2014
Monday 3:59 pm
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Formulaic documentaries. The current trend seems to be more about tying everything together into a bullet-point list of visual interest stuff rather than expressing interesting thoughts, ideas or information. It's weird, the focus is so shallow and shifts so frequently (usually with a musical crescendo dug out from a film soundtrack) it's like watching a trailer about a documentary rather than the documentary itself, it's that exact style of editing.

I think I know why it's done, too, probably efficiency. There's a factory line for shit documentaries. On the bright side, that means it's always refreshing when you tune in to a documentary that has clearly been made with a different kind of production in mind.

Still, I'm a bit sick of interesting topics getting this treatment, particularly when they're churned out to meet some 'high-brow' quota for the channel. Particularly upsetting is when there's clearly been some effort made to find an expert and create something informative, only to have it diced up into the same cookie-cutter shape all other documentaries have taken.

Whinge and autism. [X]
>> No. 16382 Anonymous
25th August 2014
Monday 4:12 pm
16382 spacer
>>16381

That is a wonderfully coherent expression of an opinion I completely agree with. ***** Must read.
>> No. 16383 Anonymous
25th August 2014
Monday 4:54 pm
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Upper middle class decorations/markets/gifts/paraphernalia/general wank.

So this weekend my town had a "gardening festival". I don't have a garden but thought I'd take a look anyway. It was basically just a gardening themed market, but in the whole market the most gardening-related stall had nothing more than a few plants, the rest of the stalls were basically just general gifts and decorations. Someone was selling rusty old garden tools for a bloody fortune. There was a stall selling quiches, about 10 different flavours for quiches, (and a small plate of sausage rolls for people who don't like quiche).

Nothing against the people selling the stuff of course, just the overall wankery of the people who are actually buying it.
>> No. 16384 Anonymous
26th August 2014
Tuesday 8:37 pm
16384 spacer
>>16383
A garden centre near me stocks an over-abundance of wood carvings in the shape of love hearts and letters that spell out "love" or small bits of whitewashed wood with smarmy love-themed or otherwise "haha my husband likes (insert hobby here) so I will get a sign that mocks his hobby"-themed slogans on them.
Whatever happened to property being theft and paper tigers, I ask you!
>> No. 16388 Anonymous
27th August 2014
Wednesday 3:06 am
16388 spacer
I started watching the horror series The Strain tonight, and after the second episode I was bursting for a pee. Sadly the bulb in my bathroom has gone, so I'll have to wait until sunrise.
>> No. 16389 Anonymous
27th August 2014
Wednesday 6:26 am
16389 spacer
>>16383

>Someone was selling rusty old garden tools for a bloody fortune.

You see people selling tat on eBay and calling it "shabby chic".
>> No. 16390 Anonymous
27th August 2014
Wednesday 6:46 am
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>>16388
It starts getting real pandemic like from episode 5 onwards. Also do you not have a phone?
>> No. 16391 Anonymous
27th August 2014
Wednesday 11:17 am
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>>16390

I do own a phone, but it was the spookiness that put me off.

And despite three solid episodes of The Strain really not enrapturing me, I will prevail onwards with your recommendation. I hope the dialogue gets better, the first episode when the flight controller says "waoh, it's like a building with wings" had me in stitches.
>> No. 16392 Anonymous
28th August 2014
Thursday 7:09 pm
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French people who speak English with an American accent.
>> No. 16393 Anonymous
28th August 2014
Thursday 7:34 pm
16393 spacer
>>16392

Surely French Canadians get a pass?
>> No. 16394 Anonymous
28th August 2014
Thursday 10:00 pm
16394 spacer
>>16393
They're not real French though.
>> No. 16395 Anonymous
28th August 2014
Thursday 10:01 pm
16395 spacer
>>16394
They're not real people either. Fucking Canada.
>> No. 16396 Anonymous
28th August 2014
Thursday 10:08 pm
16396 spacer
>>16395
Hey now why all the hostility there, eh bud?
>> No. 16397 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 8:56 am
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>>16396
There's some moron here who has weird ideas about Canada. Don't pay any attention to her.
>> No. 16398 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 9:37 pm
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Someone on my Facebook recently said to her mate "I can't wait to see your humble abode", and it's pissed me off unnecessarily. "Humble abode" isn't used that way, she just called her mate's house shit.
>> No. 16399 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 9:39 pm
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>>16398
I'm fairly sure it's a Tomb Raider reference, lad.
>> No. 16400 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 9:41 pm
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>>16399
I thought so too but I just Googled it and it's in the Oxford Dictionary.
>> No. 16401 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 9:49 pm
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>>16398

Maybe her mate's house is shit though?
>> No. 16402 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 9:50 pm
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>>16401
>I can't wait to see your humble abode
She hasn't even seen it yet.
>> No. 16403 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 10:27 pm
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>>16398>>16399>>16400

I'm not sure if you lot are joking or what, but it's quite common (or so I thought) to welcome someone into your house in a self-deprecating fashion by saying "welcome to my humble abode". Perhaps this lass just got the wrong end of the stick and thought it was ok to use the same turn of phrase (without stopping to think what it actually meant) to refer to someone else's house.
>> No. 16404 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 10:29 pm
16404 spacer
>>16403
Yes lad, and in Tomb Raider (3?) it's what Are Lara says when you spawn the mansion level.
>> No. 16405 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 10:43 pm
16405 spacer
>>16403
Yes, it's common to say my humble abode. Yes, she's got the wrong end of the stick and thought that "humble abode" just means "house" and hasn't stopped to think what calling someone else's home humble might come across as. Yes, all of the other people reading it are thick as fuck enough not to realise either and it went entirely undetected apart from one enormous aspie, yours truly. I'm aware it's a non-thing, but that's what this thread is for.

>>16404
We get it, a very common phrase which far predates Tomb Raider was used in Tomb Raider.
>> No. 16406 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 10:47 pm
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>>16405
Rubbish, I know for a fact she's referencing Tomb Raider and a defy you to prove otherwise.
>> No. 16407 Anonymous
29th August 2014
Friday 10:55 pm
16407 spacer
>>16406
*I
>> No. 16409 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 6:27 am
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CD cases where it's cardboard and an incredibly tight squeeze and you can't take the CD in and out without scratching it to buggery.

Also hidden tracks where it's got eight minutes of silence pasted on the beginning and you've got to skip through.
>> No. 16421 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:08 pm
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I've got the backdoor open and the woman from next door is loudly on the phone with her mum. I've lost count of the amount of times she's said "just chilling" as a way of saying she's done fuck all. Apparently just chilling is "well nice." Then she got off the phone and then started calling her boyfriend babes. I thought people like this only existed on the telly as gross exaggerations.
>> No. 16422 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:16 pm
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>>16421
Calm down, babes, sounds like you need to just chill. Go put your feet up and watch x Factpr, it'll be well nice.
>> No. 16423 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:17 pm
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>>16421
Sorry mate, this is about 60% of our country. The harrowing public transport rides reminded me of the way how people talk to one another - redundant and repetitive vocabulary. I mean, talk how you want, but it gives a good insight into what kind of simpleton you are.
>> No. 16424 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:22 pm
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Take note everyone: don't use colloquialisms on the bus, or wee Willy Wordsworth in the corner will call you a simpleton on the internet.
>> No. 16425 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:31 pm
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>>16424

All he's saying is use proper words, be treated like a proper human. Is that so hard?
>> No. 16426 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:39 pm
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>>16423>>16424
Not entirely sure if this is /101/ material but seeing every single passenger on the bus, train or tram using a phone. It's a little scary.

Then my brother reminded me that it's no different to every passenger reading a newspaper before mobile phones were a thing beyond Snake on a 3310.

Also I heard that the reason people get angry with phone conversations on public transport is not due to the volume but because you're only hearing one half of the conversation and your brain is desperately trying to fill in the games. I'd compare it to using capchas that do not use real words. Maybe it's just me but I can touch type like most people on this site but once a word that doesn't exist comes up I type very slowly, head down on the keyboard.
>> No. 16427 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:39 pm
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>>16426
*fill in the gaps.

Well that ruined everything about the touch typing.
>> No. 16428 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:41 pm
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>>16425
The problem there is that it's not up to him, you, or me to decide what is and is not a "proper word". Is it so hard to refrain from being a judgemental prick about how other people express themselves?
>> No. 16429 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:42 pm
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>>16428
Yes.
>> No. 16430 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:46 pm
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>>16428

Yeppo!
>> No. 16431 Anonymous
31st August 2014
Sunday 9:48 pm
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>>16424
No, it's just telling how boring people are. It goes across class/social status, as I hear the same boring shite being bleated and chewed over at work and elsewhere.
>> No. 16434 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 5:17 pm
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"I like music."

Of course you do! Ever since a human heard a rock fall down a hill, everyone has liked music. It's a trait I've already assumed, like you being carbon based and oxygen breathing.
>> No. 16435 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 5:25 pm
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>>16434
I do not like music

When I was born I was deaf and for the first three years of my life I was that way. I had an operation to fix my ears at age 3. The results were the following: poor balance, being unable to ride a bike until I was in my teens due to that balance, having to use subtitles when I watch a DVD, asking people to repeat things a lot and not really enjoying music. I don't like music.

I'm not a special snowflake, I just don't like music. I don't enjoy anything like festivals. I would imagine if I wasn't deaf for those first three years I would like music. What I don't like on top of that is people saying "HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE MUSIC, YOU'RE WEIRD", so I just avoid mentioning it in real life as it's the same everytime.
>> No. 16436 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 6:07 pm
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>>16435
That's interesting. Is your lack of enjoyment entirely down to your deafness to the age of three, or is your hearing still not perfect now?
>> No. 16439 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 6:12 pm
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>>16436
>is your hearing still not perfect now?

Read the damn post,lad. He talks about "having to use subtitles when I watch a DVD, asking people to repeat things a lot" and clearly still has problems with his hearing.
>> No. 16440 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 6:13 pm
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>>16439
Alright sorry. My question still stands though, he thinks "if I wasn't deaf for those first three years I would like music", but is the fact his hearing is not 100% now not got anything at all to do with it?
>> No. 16441 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 6:14 pm
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>>16436
My hearing is awful now. Not enough to legally call me partially deaf though. I imagine it's a combination of being fully deaf for the first three years of my life and my almost partially deaf state now. I picked up video games at a young age (around about 5) and still play them to this day. I would imagine that being deaf at a young age had something to do with my development and just made me used to not listening to music.
>> No. 16442 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 6:17 pm
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>>16434
I'm not so sure everyone likes music, but have you ever tried suggesting to someone that they're "not really a music person"? Even with no evidence that they are actually into any music in particular, nor an enjoyment of the asinine shit on the radio, if you hint at all at someone that they're not that into music then they'll pounce on you. It's fine with pretty much everything else, but not music.
>> No. 16454 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 7:12 pm
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>>16435

You could have Amusia. It is actually a brain thingy(technical term).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amusia

Happened to be talking to a mate about this the other day and he mentioned it. Of course it could be any other number of things, either just the damage to your hearing or it just not being to your taste for one particular reason or other OR YOU BEING A MASSIVE BRAIN DAMAGED SPAKKER WITH A MIND WRONG.

Just the way your brain's wired I guess. It is pretty unusual though, you can't really blame people for being surprised, especially when music is such an emotive thing for the majority. The wiki article's vaguely interesting anyway.
>> No. 16458 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 7:21 pm
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>>16442
>not a music person

Seems a pretty fair description of me. I enjoy music, and steer well clear of radio dross, but it hardly defines my life choices.

Personally I can't understand how people keep their headphones on all day and drown out the world - it would drive me potty.
>> No. 16459 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 7:23 pm
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>>16454
Oh dear this is how it ends up in real life too.

After people have gone through the initial shock and then trying to understand it logically they assume I'm a broken person just because I'm at most indifferent to music. On the bright side nobody has come up to my house with pitchforks and torches for not liking music yet.

The interesting thing is people will understand person not being fond of television, video games, books, the internet but they get really angry over someone not liking music. HOW DARE THAT PERSON NOT ENJOY MUSIC, THEY MUST BE A NONCE.
>> No. 16462 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 7:43 pm
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>>16459
Yeah I wasn't trying to pigeon hole you or anything lad, was just suggesting it might actually be part of a documented condition. The brain damaged spakker part was meant in jest.

Thought it was an interesting article/phenomenon regardless, and also something that doesn't seem to be widely known, or at least I'd never heard of it till the other day.
>> No. 16465 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 8:47 pm
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When your ears are really bunged up because of a cold, it's borderline unpleasant to listen to music because it draws attention to how wonky your hearing is.
>> No. 16466 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 10:38 pm
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>>16459

It's because, really, everyone likes music. It's like, the universal language. One of the things that unites us as a species even when som many things divide us.

Everyone understands music, instinctively. Any human you encounter on this planet, if you can't speak their language, even if they have no spoken language, chances are they will still dance to a tune. Soldiers on the Western Front would sIng to one another over the frontline, and play tunes to one another during lulls in the fighting. Music is one of the most powerful artforms we have invented and it is mystifying the way in which simple sounds bring us such pleasure.

People think you're broken and wierd because, and I'm sorry, I honestly don't mean this in a nasty way- You just are. It's like if you walked everywhere sideways and claimed you're just indifferent to putting one foot in front of the other. It is, like it or not, an unusual and defining trait.
>> No. 16469 Anonymous
2nd September 2014
Tuesday 11:27 pm
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>>16466
Nah.

Music's overrated.
>> No. 16471 Anonymous
3rd September 2014
Wednesday 12:21 am
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>>16466
>It is, like it or not, an unusual and defining trait.
That's nothing, I once knew a bloke who didn't like chips.

Just let that sink in. Who the fuck doesn't like chips?
>> No. 16472 Anonymous
3rd September 2014
Wednesday 12:25 am
16472 spacer
>>16471

I hear macrobiotics types disapprove of potatoes because they're from the nightshade family. Maybe he brainwashed himself into thinking he didn't like chips, like vegetarians and bacon.
>> No. 16474 Anonymous
3rd September 2014
Wednesday 11:38 am
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>>16435
>I would imagine if I wasn't deaf for those first three years I would like music.
I was born with poor hearing and as a kid I went through grommets, hearing aids and all that shit. I love music and eventually went on to study a PhD in music technology.

Not in any way saying my anecdote disproves what you're saying, after all I wasn't fully deaf (I think 40-50db loss?), just thought it might add some perspective. "Not enough to legally call me partially deaf" implies that your hearing is good enough that you can listen to music if you want to, and consequently there's every reason for people to be surprised that you don't; if you can partake in something with universal appeal and don't, people will wonder why.

>>16454
I'd never heard of "amusia" before, thanks for that. I once had a bout of tinnitus which also made all music sound out of tune. I was 15 at the time and it scared the fuck out of me, thinking it might be permanent. I still get nauseous just thinking about it.
>> No. 16476 Anonymous
3rd September 2014
Wednesday 2:54 pm
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>>16471
>a bloke who didn't like chips

Horrifying. A strong argument for eugenics right there.
>> No. 16490 Anonymous
4th September 2014
Thursday 1:30 am
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Whoever mixed the audio on The X-Files really needs to have a long, hard think about whether they tried their hardest. Half the time the music's screeching all over the dialogue, in fact it's almost universal in bits prior to the title sequence*.

*There's a name for that and I demand that you tell me.
>> No. 16492 Anonymous
4th September 2014
Thursday 1:48 am
16492 spacer
>>16490

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_open
>> No. 16495 Anonymous
4th September 2014
Thursday 4:03 am
16495 spacer
>>16492

<3 U!
>> No. 16499 Anonymous
5th September 2014
Friday 9:29 pm
16499 spacer

WinstonWolfe.jpg
164991649916499
For some reason the character of Winston Wolfe from Pulp Fiction is now being used to sell home insurance, but whenever I see him all I think about is how many times they say the word "nigger" in the preceding scenes, and the murders. Oh, and the bum rape.

It's a bit weird, sort of like the two guys from Funny Games trying sell me garden furniture.
>> No. 16500 Anonymous
5th September 2014
Friday 10:15 pm
16500 spacer
>>16499
I'm unfamiliar with this advertising campaign and can't for the life of me fathom which company would think it a fun/smart/topbantz move to make. Could you provide a link so I can find it as irritating as you do?

"0800 2 15000" from Lombard Direct was annoying enough as far as financial ads go, if my memory is horribly correct and bound to drunk call them with appropriate documents to hand.
>> No. 16501 Anonymous
5th September 2014
Friday 10:20 pm
16501 spacer
>>16500
I just remembered this, I was looking for the Lombard Direct ad but got distracted and remembered "Purple Loans", which is from 2:25 in this video.

https://www.youtube.com/v/v4CfoI0WCDc

It also features the PI Helpline ad before the Esure ad, inspiration for Serafinowicz' most enduring creation. Ads have always been shit. Sage for addendum.
>> No. 16502 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 10:35 am
16502 spacer
Someone mentioned it in a thread on /b/, and I believe it deserves a mention here: I find myself grating my teeth to stumps when people go off on one about paying "Road Tax" which supposedly pays for all road building and maintenance, when that's paid for out of general taxation or even paid for to an extent by Council Tax.
I haven't yet rationalised a reason for Vehicle Excise Duty, but it's definitely not to purely pay for road upkeep/extensions.
>> No. 16503 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 11:17 am
16503 spacer
>>16502

It should be, though. If it did, there would be enough money left over to fund a state owned AA/RAC type service.

Road Tax has a lot of issues.
>> No. 16504 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 7:37 pm
16504 spacer
>>16502

VED is charged in proportion to CO2 emissions per km, so it's reasonable to regard it as a tax on pollution; The most fuel-efficient cars pay no VED whatsoever.
>> No. 16505 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 8:24 pm
16505 spacer
>>16504
Unfortunately modern diesels pay the least tax and our air quality has gone down the shitter because of them.
>> No. 16506 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 8:27 pm
16506 spacer
Why haven't the engineers electrified the roads yet? It just seems like common sense to me. Can't be that difficult to set up. We already do it with bumper cars.
>> No. 16507 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 8:30 pm
16507 spacer
Imperial units.

Everything needs to go metric, there's not one good reason not to.

And I've already ignored the reason you're about the highlight, so don't bother.
>> No. 16508 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 8:43 pm
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165081650816508
>>16507
I for one love or bastardised mix of both. Nothing beats imperial where comprehension is important, but metric is best where precision is important.

It's wonderful to live in a country where we can sell pipe with a diameter in inches and a wall thickness in mm. It's unbelievably simple.
>> No. 16509 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 8:55 pm
16509 spacer
>>16504
>VED is charged in proportion to CO2 emissions per km
This has been said here before. It wasn't correct then either.
>> No. 16510 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 9:02 pm
16510 spacer
>>16509

U WOT M8?

https://www.gov.uk/vehicle-tax-rate-tables
>> No. 16512 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 10:06 pm
16512 spacer
>>16510
>in proportion
Last time I checked, £20 is not 10% more than £0, and neither is £225 50% more than £30. You don't work for the Yes campaign, by any chance, do you?
>> No. 16513 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 10:17 pm
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>>16512
I see. You think the word proportional only exists in mathematics and doesn't have a looser definition in everyday usage. Or in other words, you're an idiot of a pedant.
>> No. 16514 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 10:28 pm
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>>16513
Have you forgotten where you are, lad?
>> No. 16515 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 10:54 pm
16515 spacer
>>16513

He assumes that 'proportion' refers only to the direct proportion of a linear function.

The relationship between CO2 emissions and VED rates is discontinuous, to incentivise the purchase of vehicles significantly below the EU fleet average target of 130g/km and disincentivise the purchase of extremely inefficient vehicles. That doesn't alter the fact that they are proportionally related.

Harrumph.
>> No. 16516 Anonymous
8th September 2014
Monday 11:18 pm
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>>16515
>He assumes that 'proportion' refers only to the direct proportion of a linear function.
That might be because when we say "in proportion to", that's pretty much what it means. VED rates are no more "in proportion to" emissions than Income Tax rates are "in proportion to" income.
>> No. 16517 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 3:27 am
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Twitch.

I just hate the fucking service. I've had two different ISPs throttle me for using it meanwhile other stream sites were fine. I hate that I have to make an account to chat. I hate the admins there. I hate that google now owns it. I hate that every game channel on youtube uses it.

I won't go into youtube either because I've made several threads and posts about how they fuck up. Even fucking Youtube Centre can't keep up with its bullshit.
>> No. 16518 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 4:10 am
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Cooking programmes/videos intended to teach where the chef uses obscure ingredients.
>> No. 16519 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 4:36 am
16519 spacer
>>16517
Remember when if you clicked on a point in a youtube video, it would actually go to that point instead of you having to click it five times first?

Remember when they didn't make you re-buffer shit you've just watched?

Remember whenGAAAAAH I wish google hadn't bought them out. Everything they touch turns to shit.
>> No. 16520 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 8:30 am
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>>16517 >>16519
>I hate that google now owns it.
I hate that internet gossip penetrates your heads and not actual news, like say, Amazon acquiring Twitch.
>> No. 16521 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 1:11 pm
16521 spacer
I took a stopwatch to the gates outside my flat. It takes 42 seconds for them to open far enough to get my little car through. Forty-two agonising seconds. The only upside is that Chelsea Tractors have to wait even longer.
>> No. 16522 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 3:44 pm
16522 spacer
>>16521
Shit that takes long that shouldn't, really boils my piss.

My built-in bathroom fan goes on for 10 min 40 seconds. Fucking hell, it's probably gone through at least 2 bathroom sized volume changes by then. I sometimes just piss in the dark with average success.
>> No. 16523 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 4:28 pm
16523 spacer
>>16522

Fag packet calculation:

According to an article in the Independent, the average British bathroom is 8ft x 6ft. The usual ceiling height is 7'10", the same length as a sheet of plasterboard. That gives us a volume of 10.6m^3.

Looking at a few extractor fans on the Wickes website, it seems that an airflow of 75m^3/hr is typical. At 1.25m^3/min, that equates to 13.33m^3 of air shifted by your fan each time.

Given a 20w fan motor and 13p per unit of electricity, the fan is costing you 0.04p per piss.

Or you could just pop off the fan grille and adjust the timer control with a small screwdriver.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/this-britain/diy-by-numbers-530199.html
>> No. 16524 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 4:40 pm
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>>16523
Lovely. It appears my bathroom was split into the sink/boiler area, and toilet/shower area, which isn't as large.

I looked into doing the DIY, but it's a bit of a ballache - and as I'm renting, I don't want to ask the landlord, and explain my autism to him.
>> No. 16525 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 10:01 pm
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I normally use my middle-mouse-button in browsers for its "open in new tab" functionality.
Unfortunately a lot of shops have javascript which overrules this so that when you middle click on a link, it opens that link in a new tab AND in your current tab.
>> No. 16526 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 10:09 pm
16526 spacer
>>16525
Is this why recently, when middle-clicking links, they are opening in two or more tabs maybe 70% of the time?
>> No. 16527 Anonymous
9th September 2014
Tuesday 10:16 pm
16527 spacer
>>16526
I think if they're opening more than 2 tabs for you, then you've just got a dodgy mouse.
>> No. 16528 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 6:26 am
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>>16527
Ah, fuck it. Didn't want to get a new one for a while.

While I'm here, any recommendations? My one right now is a SteelSeries Xai which I like a lot. I wouldn't mind a cheaper one though. £50 max, maybe?
>> No. 16529 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 7:05 am
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>>16526
>>16527
Or Parkinson's.
>> No. 16530 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 10:06 am
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People who tell you almost daily that they woke up at whatever totally unnecessary time in the morning to be at the same place as you (work, usually) just so they can claim some kind of moral superiority over you.
>> No. 16531 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 12:49 pm
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>>16530
I work in a supermarket. Fuck those bakery cunts.
>> No. 16532 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 2:33 pm
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>>16531
I mean that dreary bastard who works more or less the same job and starts at the same time and has no bona fide reason (like having babies yelling at 3AM) to get up so stupidly early for the exact same thing.
>> No. 16533 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 3:22 pm
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>>16530>>16531>>16532
I'm that cunt who will tell you I went to bed at 3-5am and had only a couple hours sleep..
>> No. 16534 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 4:29 pm
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>>16533
Then please cease and desist, I couldn't care less if you frequently shit the bed and have a manic episode every morning. Wasting your own downtime is no reason to wear it like some kind of badge of honour of being a better person.

Riles me up something rotten.
>> No. 16535 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 9:09 pm
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>>16381

Reiterating this for this fucking Ebola documentary. Shakey satellite camera views, incessant cinematic music, "SWEEPING TO ONE VILLAGE, THEN ANOTHER... THEN ANOTHER"

Fuck you for talking down to me again, BBC. You used to aspire to more than this.
>> No. 16536 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 9:12 pm
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>>16535

Oh good, a House MD style internal CGI moment. Arseholes.
>> No. 16537 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 9:31 pm
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>>16530
I agree, extending to any cunt who thinks that lack of sleep is something to be proud of. Congratulations, you won the genetic lottery and can survive on half the sleep I can. No I do not want you constantly reminding me or calling me 'lazy'.
>> No. 16538 Anonymous
10th September 2014
Wednesday 10:14 pm
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>>16537

I'll say "oh I've only had four hours sleep" sometimes. It's not ever intended to be a boast, I'm trying to excuse my impending incompetence.
>> No. 16541 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 12:37 am
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I got my bread from the milkman this morning and the little sticky tab on the top had been sealed exactly symmetrically.
>> No. 16542 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 12:46 am
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People who use Nazi war criminals/SS units for their online monikers while playing video games.
>> No. 16543 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 12:53 am
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>>16542
Were you just beaten by TEAM KDF as well?
>> No. 16544 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 12:54 am
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>>16542
But then how else are you supposed to let the world know that you hate non-whites?
>> No. 16545 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 12:54 am
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I hate going up town at night and seeing hundreds and hundreds of drunk young people. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it so fucking much.
>> No. 16546 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 12:57 am
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>>16545
Have you considered not going up town at night?
>> No. 16547 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 1:09 am
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>>16543

No idea who that is.

I wouldn't mind so much if it was just any old German army unit, but it's always SS, why?

>>16544

I don't know, committing suicide in imaginative ways with a lengthy explanation tied around their necks?
>> No. 16548 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 1:21 am
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>>16546

I applaud when stupid drunk people die
>> No. 16549 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 11:48 am
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>>16547
Re-enactment groups are pretty much exclusively SS Divisions judging from the couple of events I've been to and what I see online, it's certainly more than a bit unsettling considering ARE LADS and Uncle Joe made sure they didn't set foot for real on ARE GRENE AND PLEASENT LAND.
>> No. 16550 Anonymous
14th September 2014
Sunday 1:04 pm
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>>16547
"Kraft durch Freude"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strength_Through_Joy
>> No. 16551 Anonymous
16th September 2014
Tuesday 4:35 pm
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Why does Excel set the minimum of my graphs at >0 when the means are close together?

When is it ever acceptable to do this? You end up with a tiny difference looking massive.

Fox News tier graphs.

So I analyze my data and shit when it looks significant, then realize the y axis is fucked, then I have to manually change it back to zero. Every fucking time.
>> No. 16552 Anonymous
16th September 2014
Tuesday 5:55 pm
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>>16549

And the Canadians, Brazilians, Poles, French and we must never forget the Italian, umm, efforts. Basically loads of people, but yeah, it's always the vicious fucking fascists. God, if you just hate the Reds throw on some Finnish gear.

>>16550

Yeah, well I doubt sitting hunched over a keyboard until 3AM or standing around in a field drinking real ale lead to any increase in strength. But perhaps I'm simply uninitiated.
>> No. 16553 Anonymous
17th September 2014
Wednesday 1:31 am
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>>16530

I usually counter this by telling them I was up til 3 playing Battlefield and got out of bed half an hour before my shift.

I think that's much more of an achievement. Any cunt can get to work on time if they give themselves a three hour head start, what's so impressive about that?
>> No. 16555 Anonymous
17th September 2014
Wednesday 3:03 pm
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I just licked an envelope and got a papercut on my tongue.
>> No. 16556 Anonymous
17th September 2014
Wednesday 11:02 pm
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I just woke up after about 7 hours of sleep. I'm definitely not bragging. Although I is a good excuse to have some Coco Pops.
>> No. 16557 Anonymous
17th September 2014
Wednesday 11:08 pm
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>>16556

*it is

Sorry.
>> No. 16558 Anonymous
18th September 2014
Thursday 12:24 am
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>>16556
back to /zoo/ with you lad.
>> No. 16559 Anonymous
20th September 2014
Saturday 1:18 pm
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It's more humorous than irritating, but BBC news just flashed up the words "Breaking News: Arnhem Parachute Jump".
>> No. 16560 Anonymous
20th September 2014
Saturday 8:21 pm
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A big thankyou to whoever thought it was a good idea to close the slip road onto the M4 and signpost it about 300 yards in advance instead of, say, before the previous junction. That way maybe I wouldn't have had to sit in a three-mile long queue for half an hour only to now have to go several miles in the wrong direction and turn around at one of the most awkward junctions around.
>> No. 16561 Anonymous
20th September 2014
Saturday 9:39 pm
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>>16560
Possessions (closing things for work) management is a thorny issue. Whose job it is to coordinate traffic around them and communicate their existence often results in a lot of buck-passing and finger-pointing.
>> No. 16562 Anonymous
22nd September 2014
Monday 3:26 pm
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People that use hands-free kits to speak on their mobile phones and then hold the phone are the fucking worst.

I saw somebody once and they were talking into the hands-free kit holding the phone in one hand and holding the microphone of the hands-free kit up to their mouth with the other. Thus taking twice as many hands to use a phone instead of just holding the phone up to their ear.

At least I can take consolation in the fact that these hands-free kits act to amplify the mobile network microwave death rays so they wont be alive for as long as people who use mobile phones properly.
>> No. 16563 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 9:42 am
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Everything is cunting me off lately, and it just so happens it coincides with freshers week.

I'm working at it at my uni, and being an olderlad, it amazes me how much of them still have their proverbial nappies on and bring with them their childish behaviour.

I really hate working on a committee with equally wet-behind-the-ears chaps/chapesses - everything falls to shit almost on commands. No one can be bothered with anything, it's usually left to the poor sod who shows a hint of responsibility which probably has to do something with age.

A young 19 - 20 year old exhibits the perfect mix on total inexperience and arrogance with a side of utter laziness. Fuck free tuition, most of these shits come for the laugh and because their mates did and are hanging around for the freebies, handjobs and cushy repeat exams. Cunts.
>> No. 16564 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 10:03 am
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>>16563
I know what you mean m8. I went to uni in my 20s and its shocking how little initiative youths show and how they seem to view the whole thing as about the 'experience' despite how their grades will effect the rest of their lives.

Don't get me started on SU Fridays.
>> No. 16565 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 11:27 am
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>>16564
"it's all about liofe experience innit?"

I can understand the hate they get now, I had the opportunity to work/study around Europe and the youth there have such a mature / better understanding of the world around them. They have excellent stewardship and feel like a part of society instead of being a burden.

Luckily as the treasurer, I'm going to piss off the moment the SU stuff begins and just deal with back of house issues exclusively.
>> No. 16566 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 11:54 am
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>>16565
>I can understand the hate they get now, I had the opportunity to work/study around Europe and the youth there have such a mature / better understanding of the world around them. They have excellent stewardship and feel like a part of society instead of being a burden.

I don't mean to sound contrarian, but I think a lot of this can be put down to how young people are viewed and treated as they're growing up. People from their early teenages onward are treated exactly like burdens. Reinforce the stereotype that a certain group of people are disrespectful, ignorant or lazy often enough, and you'll alienate them to the point where they do separate themselves from society and any responsibility they'd have to it.

Maybe a better way of putting that is it suggests to me a shitty cultural attitude that divides people by age, rather than any embedded flaw in young people who happen to be born here.
>> No. 16567 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 12:02 pm
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>>16566
You're probably right - I'm just bitter and jaded at the moment as I've trawled through a obscene volume of young people over the past week.

I feel helpless as an individual to instil a sense of responsibility - as it's soul crushing to see no one giving any fuck about anything at all - besides the swag they haul from the freshers fair, and how polluted they will get that night.
>> No. 16568 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 12:05 pm
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>>16565
I agree with that about foreign students. As a fellow Erasmus student, I was taken aback by just how seriously ze Germans take their studies, seeing it as a social responsibility to bring benefits to their country and their neighbours. It was definitely my favourite year and actually kept in touch with more people I met abroad than the idiots I was studying and graduating with here in Blighty.

I think the problem comes down to a large number of British teenagers having a colossal sense of self-entitlement and having parents who are apparently stupid enough to throw £thousands at their disgusting kids and enable this kind of behaviour.
>> No. 16570 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 5:29 pm
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>>16566
>I think a lot of this can be put down to how young people are viewed and treated as they're growing up.

I concur. In a 2007 study by Unicef, British children were assessed as having the worst living conditions out of 21 developed countries. Our children ranked dead last in family and peer relationships, behaviours and risks and subjective wellbeing. We have a generation who are materially comfortable, but deprived in almost every other sense.

Young people in Britain are consistently demonised. They're blamed for shortcomings in the education system, and stereotyped in ways that are completely false. Rates of drug and alcohol use and criminal behaviour are consistently falling amongst young people, but they are still characterised by the media as delinquents in spite of the fact that they are better behaved than their parents generation were.

Exam results are an obvious example of this media narrative. If GCSE and A-level attainment falls, then young people are blamed for being lazy; If attainment improves, then it is just because exams keep getting easier in our trophies-for-all culture of entitlement. Young people are placed in a lose-lose scenario where any possible outcome is just used to reinforce pre-existing prejudices against them. Youth unemployment continues to rise and the media continues to blame young people, rather than the economic factors causing huge increases in youth unemployment across Europe or the failure of the education system to prepare them for work.

We even blame young people for the values and beliefs that we have taught them. We repeat the mantra "Follow your passions, you can do anything if you set your mind to it.", then accuse young people of being entitled and naive when they choose degree subjects with poor employment prospects. We blame young people for our failure to nurture them, we blame them for fitting the mould we cast them from.

http://www.unicef.org/media/files/ChildPovertyReport.pdf
http://www.hscic.gov.uk/catalogue/PUB11334
>> No. 16571 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 5:40 pm
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>>16570

Thank you for articulating than far better than I could have.
>> No. 16572 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 5:50 pm
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>>16570

Well said.

I think the current middle-aged generation is going to have quite a shock on its hands a few years down the line. When the youth of today are the ones who rule the world, they're going to give very little back to those who brought them up.

Today's young people, from the very beginning, have had to work twice as hard as their parents did to achieve half as much.
>> No. 16573 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 6:02 pm
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>>16570
I completely agree. There are doubtless a lot of shitheads amongst the youth of today but there are always shitheads in any given demographic. The Mail et al. constantly draw attention to THE EVIL HOODIES THAT WANT YOUR PENSION MONEY!!! Nobody wants to read a story about engaged youth because that doesn't pander to their prejudices and how.

It obviously doesn't help how most older people are inclined to both ignore economic data and conveniently remember their younger selves as fitter versions of them currently with the same experiences and thoughts etc.
>> No. 16574 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 6:17 pm
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>>16570
You have reminded me that my old school effectively had a poor door. Most of us had a choice of using the old entrance or the main gate, depending on where we came from and where we were going, but the kids on free meals effectively had to use the old entrance because that's where the hatch where that gave out the tokens was. When a new building opened and the school office moved, the tokens were still handed out from the old office.

In effect, from the age of 11 the poor kids were being taught to know their place. In through the back door, and no bothering the paying customers please.
>> No. 16575 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 7:41 pm
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Sainsburys have charged me £1.65 for three granny smith apples.
>> No. 16576 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 7:44 pm
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>>16575
Some dozy git probably had their hand on the scale while they weighed them.
>> No. 16577 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 8:59 pm
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>>16570>>16568

As the original poster of this student rant I feel like a cunt.
>> No. 16578 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 9:47 pm
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>>16577

The fact that you feel like a cunt means you're a good guy; You have the courage to revise your opinion in light of new information and ideas. An actual cunt would have just got angry and called me a soft-headed liberal prick. Good on ya.
>> No. 16579 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 10:35 pm
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>>16578
It's just that I wasn't raised in dis hya cunry, and I was getting tired of the apathy and crass materialism.

Sad to say it isn't going to change soon, what with dominos and bars giving away free grease and alcohol. It's insulting to the senses.
>> No. 16580 Anonymous
23rd September 2014
Tuesday 11:45 pm
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"The Revolution Will Be Televised". What an utterly crap show. Their politics are fine, but the sketches are shit.

Anyway, they've managed to get a third (?) series and they've gone to the US to make Monica Lewinsky jokes. Fuck me, that shit was old hat 10 years ago.
>> No. 16581 Anonymous
24th September 2014
Wednesday 12:06 am
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Some cunt posted in /v/ saying that there were some new Adam Curtis films coming out in July.

July was ages ago and I've only just remembered that they never appeared to get angry about it.

Cunt.

Why does time slip away so fast? It really fucking bothers me actually. I'm starting to feel like I'm hurtling towards my early death at an alarming pace.
>> No. 16582 Anonymous
24th September 2014
Wednesday 10:29 am
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1C Company. Stupid fucking Ruskie devs and their trash games. The only fixes I can find are for Vista, and the sequels that actually run have about one quarter of the content.

>>16581

That was me, I'm sorry for disappointing you and simultaneously making you so aware of your own mortality.
>> No. 16583 Anonymous
24th September 2014
Wednesday 4:48 pm
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>>16581
I look at my laptop which I bought pretty recently and suddenly realise it was in 2011. Bugger it. Three years have passed in a blink of an eye. When am I going to wake up another time, 2021?
>>16582
What game are you trying to play, lad?
>> No. 16584 Anonymous
24th September 2014
Wednesday 5:58 pm
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>>16583

It's called Theatre of War. It's pretty autism tier, but sometimes it's nice spending an hour or three searching the tree line for an AT gun, whilst said AT gun plinks rounds off your tanks. Also it's one of the only WW2 games where you can play as the French and the Poles. The sequel (pictured) doesn't even have the USA.
>> No. 16585 Anonymous
25th September 2014
Thursday 2:12 am
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>>16583

Happens all the time with music. I occasionally check the internet for a band I had listened to a while ago, to see if they ever got around to releasing that new album or whatever. When I get to their page, it turns out they've done another three since then, and I feel completely torn out of place; momentarily aware of how my entire perception of culture is just an elaborate mental construction, and a potentially severely out of touch one at that.
>> No. 16586 Anonymous
25th September 2014
Thursday 3:50 pm
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>>16585
> When I get to their page, it turns out they've done another three since then, and I feel completely torn out of place;
Me too, me too m8. All the bloody time.
>>16584
Sadly, I'm absolutely unfamiliar with it and thus cannot offer any real help.
>> No. 16587 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 3:45 pm
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When you get up off the shitter and your trousers catch on the toilet seat, lifting it up before allowing it to come crashing down. It's even worse if you're in some rich bastards house and he has a wooden seat. There's no way he won't hear it and he'll automatically assume you're a clumsy cunt who has difficulty navigating a modern bog.
>> No. 16588 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 6:01 pm
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>>16096
For the last couple of weeks, I seem to be in an endless cycle of updates. "There's an update available!" So I install it, but naturally it's a couple of days before I restart it properly because fuck having to reload all my tabs one at a time. I restart, and immediately it tells me "There's another update available!" Again, it's installed, and I wait a couple of days, and I restart. "Hey, there's yet another update available!"

Reminds me of that time a couple of years ago when they put out what felt like three updates in a week.
>> No. 16600 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 8:43 pm
16600 spacer
Al Pacino is a massively overrated actor.

>>16588

Several months ago Steam had a habit of updating every, bloody, single day.

Actually, speaking of Steam updates, they've recently redesigned the Store tab's homepage. Despite calling it the "discovery update", what it actually does is show you games that are like the ones you already play/own. But I've already seen all of those games, because I'm not a simpleton so I looked them up of my own free will. All it really does is show me the poorer executions of concepts I'm already familiar with.
>> No. 16601 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 8:49 pm
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>>16600
I wonder if that's why when I called BT earlier they told me my broadband usage was running at over 250GB/month.
>> No. 16602 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 8:59 pm
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>>16600
>because I'm not a simpleton so I looked them up of my own free will.

This is actually worthy of its own thread, but generally: stop recommending me things, everything, everywhere, everyone. Fuck off and stop guessing at my tastes based on purchasing trends. Just fuck off, please. Let me finish my book before recommending me another.

Google Play is gradually building up an image of me and what I must like based on my YouTube views. No more 'customers who bought this also bought', just let me listen and read and think and digest it and draw the bloody connections myself.

I'm sure I speak for most people when I say that my favourite film directors, writers and musicians were found through pursuing a common creative thread founded on my own subjective judgement rather than algorithms based on sales and keywords.

Actually, why am I using Google? The fuckers present me with ads based on my life decisions by picking up keywords in e-mails. It's recommending me courses and careers just because I've signed up to job alerts. I don't like it because it's drawing my attention to the fact that my life is a miserable foregone conclusion with only so many options available to me.

Oh well. Maybe I'll snap, run away and do something unpredictable. A drifters life for me. Or perhaps I'll start seeing targeted ads linking to sites that sell little tartan bindles.
>> No. 16603 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 9:07 pm
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>>16602
Rather than having a massive teary, I'd just have used their targeting advertising opt-out feature. Each to their own.
>> No. 16604 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 9:17 pm
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>>16603

Double checked, I have opted out of everything. Keywords of emails are still used.
>> No. 16605 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 9:59 pm
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>>16604
And you know this because... ?
>> No. 16606 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 10:09 pm
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>>16602
I think it depends. If it wasn't for last.FM recommending me music I don't think I'd have got into Sondre Lerche, The Ditty Bops, Death From Above 1979, Elliott Smith, The New Pornographers, Eels, Iron & Wine and a fair few others.
>> No. 16608 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 10:56 pm
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>>16606
No darling, it doesn't depend. You're just a simpleton who prefers algorithms to lead him through life by the hand. Most people are like that to varying degrees; there's no shame in it. Every one of the bands you name are listed by Wikipedia in their /List_of_(alternative_country_musicians|indie_pop_artists|alternative_rock_artists)/ articles. Hardly obscure.
>> No. 16609 Anonymous
26th September 2014
Friday 11:12 pm
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>>16608
It rather does, I'm afraid. AffinityRecommendations systems are here to stay and as the underpinning technology (hadoop and its various surrounding systems in particular) become more and more mainstream there'll be more and more of it. To a large extent you are right: it's easy guidance for those who'd rather not discover for themselves, but given the pace of development there's no reason to think it won't get to a stage, as the sheer amount of data out there starts to overwhelm a single humans processing ability more and more, where its useful for everyone.

That or it will continue to ride on the money it generates by recommending shit to people who will buy it regardless because they can.
>> No. 16613 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 3:12 am
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>>16606

Amazon's put me onto a LOT of stuff, mostly books and albums.
>> No. 16616 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 3:23 am
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Sainsbury's online groceries flashed up a box saying "Have you tried... a book of 12 stamps?" Oh my gosh. Stamps? 12 of them?

I would have grabbed a screenshot because I was slightly tickled but I'd already clicked the link for the next page before I noticed it and it was on some kind of "confirm your order" page I couldn't reload.
>> No. 16617 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 3:38 am
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>>16616
>> No. 16618 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 6:19 am
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>>16608
How is 'discovering' music via Last.fm different from 'discovering' it in other ways? It's up to you whether you like the suggested music/related artists, not brainwashing by algorithms. Is this just another excuse to be snooty and feel superior to 'simpletons'?
>> No. 16621 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 9:16 am
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>>16618

Before Amazon recommendations etc I used to discover new music by if someone had a load of amazing music on Napster plus some stuff I'd never heard of, or the same thing with eBay sellers. I guess that was a bit like a primitive recommendation algorithm.
>> No. 16622 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 11:03 am
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>>16616

Why does Ocado make me click through FOUR different pages of "oh what about this? You didn't buy this" recommendations? Stop trying to upsell me on stuff, you're fucking Ocado, I've already overpaid you for everything anyway.
>> No. 16623 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 12:02 pm
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>>16622
They didn't make you though.
>> No. 16628 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 4:22 pm
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>>16602
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/adamcurtis/posts/NO-FUTURE
>>16618
It depends how Last.fm operates with searching. If the search is influenced by all your prior choices and there is no way to turn it off—congratulations, you're probably confined to your own personal circlejerk. Also, there's money to be made from those recommendations so those who didn't pay might be just dropped out from search results.
I don't know if this is a case with last.fm since I don't use it.
>> No. 16629 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 6:37 pm
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I didn't win the lottery yesterday despite putting two lines on. What a fucking sham.
>> No. 16630 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 6:53 pm
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I put a chicken in to marinade and forgot the ginger.

Fucks sake.
>> No. 16632 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 8:14 pm
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>>16630

You know what must be done.

Actually, who cares? Ginger tastes like crap.
>> No. 16633 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 8:30 pm
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>>16632
If ginger tastes bad the recipe is crap.
>> No. 16634 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 9:58 pm
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>>16633

Could be dodgy ginger. For some reason every time I use Asda ginger it either doesn't come through or is too strong, Sainsburys ginger is usually spot on though.
>> No. 16635 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 10:34 pm
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>>16634

I'm convinced everything in Asda's own brand is made from the same Soylent Green like material. It all manages to taste the same, from the pancakes to the underpants.
>> No. 16636 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 10:38 pm
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>>16635

>It all manages to taste the same, from the pancakes to the underpants.
Is there a story behind that statement?
>> No. 16637 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 10:46 pm
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>>16636

I am very longsighted.
>> No. 16638 Anonymous
27th September 2014
Saturday 11:01 pm
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>>16632
Ginger's wonderful.


Anyway I'll have you know my chicken was very good. I put some ginger in the spice/onion mix instead that I dumped on top of the chicken before roasting, after marinade.
>> No. 16641 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 5:31 pm
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I really, really, don't like Santander's new e-banking interface.
>> No. 16642 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 5:33 pm
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>>16641
I don't understand why the banks haven't deployed a decent interface that lets you chart your expenditure and savings. Or is Barclays Online just really shit compared with the competition?
>> No. 16643 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 5:38 pm
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>>16642

You mean like a spreadsheet? Halifax and Nationwide don't do anything like that either. It would be nice to have a little graph showing how much your savings account has gone up each month and how much has gone out of your current account.
>> No. 16644 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 5:41 pm
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>>16643
>You mean like a spreadsheet?

Yeah. That would be a genuinely useful tool, much more intuitive than having to update my own whenever I spend a few quid. You could tag your spending too, so you could see where and how you're spending.
>> No. 16645 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 5:44 pm
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>>16644

That's a really good idea, especially the tagging bit. Try suggesting it to your bank in a letter.
>> No. 16646 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 5:48 pm
16646 spacer
>>16645
I've thought about this before and hoped I'd be able to make a load of money off the idea but I don't have the skills. Oh well. Someone smartlad on this board will probably nab it.
>> No. 16647 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 5:50 pm
16647 spacer
>>16646
*some
>> No. 16648 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 8:20 pm
16648 spacer
>>16642

ING in the Netherlands do that (or at least were rolling it out a few years ago). I realise that that's probably not very helpful.
>> No. 16649 Anonymous
28th September 2014
Sunday 8:22 pm
16649 spacer
>>16648
I didn't know they were a bank, I thought they did insurance.
>> No. 16650 Anonymous
29th September 2014
Monday 12:36 pm
16650 spacer
>>16600
Just signed into Steam and seen this for myself. All the games recommended to me, I have no interest in. I used to like just browsing the new releases and also seeing what was featured. Now I have to go to the website so I'm not logged in just to see what is actually featured, and guess what? There's a game that looks pretty interesting but was never recommended to me when I was signed in.

Why can you never opt out of these fucking things.
>> No. 16655 Anonymous
29th September 2014
Monday 2:51 pm
16655 spacer
>>16650
I had the opposite experience, I was shown a game called Steam Marines, which I'll lazily describe as "roguelike Space Hulk". This is something I'd be interested in but somehow I missed it at release a year back. (Not about to pay a tenner for it though, I'll wait until the Christmas sales.)

I did notice that the custom store page is wall-to-wall indies for me, which is a bit odd as my Steam library is mostly filled with big-name games, and when I order games according to play time there's only one indie game in the top 10, arguably the 20. Admittedly this one game is right at the top and has nearly an order of magnitude more hours logged than the game at number 2, which I guess means their recommendations algorithm is weighted heavily toward the number of hours logged, but I don't consider myself an indie aficionado or anything like that. Does this mean that "ChampMan" fanatics only see footie games in their Steam store now?

>I used to like just browsing the new releases and also seeing what was featured.
You can still browse the new releases/top sellers/specials as before, just scroll down. I guess "featured", as in featured for everyone, is gone for good.
>> No. 16656 Anonymous
29th September 2014
Monday 3:10 pm
16656 spacer
Overdone toast really annoys me. Say if I'm looking forward to a nice piece of succulent butter-drenched toast, and it pops up too crispy, I am devastated. Crunching through overdone toast is a real chore.
>> No. 16660 Anonymous
29th September 2014
Monday 8:02 pm
16660 spacer
>>16656
Then why the fuck do you put it into the toaster in the first fucking place? Jesus fucking cunt sniffing christ, I knew a guy like you, who would set it to 1, and it basically was slightly warm - what is the point?
>> No. 16662 Anonymous
29th September 2014
Monday 8:09 pm
16662 spacer
>>16660
Because the toasting process unleashes the awesome power of the Maillard reaction.
>> No. 16669 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 9:17 am
16669 spacer
>>16662
But it doesn't even get to that stage - it needs some carbonation.
>> No. 16670 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 9:32 am
16670 spacer
>>16660
Do you have no concept of something being overdone? Would hate to be a guest at one of your dinner parties.
>> No. 16671 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 9:33 am
16671 spacer
The post office opens when I get to work and closes when I finish. I went in lunchtime yesterday and waited half an hour to send a fucking letter. They have self-service points, but these appear to be worse than fucking useless because someone still has to come along and collect your stuff. All I wanted was to send something recorded. If people are queueing out the door and you have half your counters unmanned you're doing it wrong.
>> No. 16672 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 9:39 am
16672 spacer
>>16670
I perfectly know what "overdone" is, the whole point of toast is to be toasted light brown - with a light crisp. Or regular crisp, just getting floppy warm bread is a indicator that someone doesn't know what a toaster is and is probably a mong.
>> No. 16673 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 10:02 am
16673 spacer
>>16669
That's not what the Maillard reaction is. Maillard/browning comes first, carbonation comes last.
>> No. 16674 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 12:59 pm
16674 spacer
>>16672
>Everyone who disagrees with me or doesn't share my tastes is probably a mong.
>> No. 16675 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 2:07 pm
16675 spacer
>>16674
Be fair, we all secretly think that.
>> No. 16676 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 4:01 pm
16676 spacer
>>16671

> If people are queueing out the door and you have half your counters unmanned you're doing it wrong.

Well not to worry lad, I'm sure practices like this will improve now that it's a fully privatised business. I mean, as we all know, the best way to maximise profits is by offering the best service!
>> No. 16677 Anonymous
30th September 2014
Tuesday 4:12 pm
16677 spacer
>>16676
As companies with good reputations will attest to.
>> No. 16678 Anonymous
1st October 2014
Wednesday 12:02 pm
16678 spacer
I don't know if I can listen to Radio 2 in a morning anymore because Moira Stewart is getting increasingly doddery and I'm not sure if I cab endure her gradual decline into dementia.
>> No. 16679 Anonymous
1st October 2014
Wednesday 12:25 pm
16679 spacer
>>16678

I think Channel 4's Jon Snow is going the same way. Although he did hit on a 18 year old Torylad last night.
>> No. 16680 Anonymous
1st October 2014
Wednesday 6:43 pm
16680 spacer
Both my best friend and my worst enemy have recently left for rather excellent universities. I'm still undecided as to which is worse.
>> No. 16681 Anonymous
1st October 2014
Wednesday 7:55 pm
16681 spacer
Virgin are coming to install my Internet connection next week, which will be nice given how shit my phone signal is here. That said, it would have been nice of them to tell me this, rather than leave me to discover it entirely by chance when browsing through my account details.
>> No. 16682 Anonymous
1st October 2014
Wednesday 10:08 pm
16682 spacer

1411503307404.png
166821668216682
RELEASE THE ADAM CURTIS DOCUMENTARIES ALREADY.
>> No. 16683 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 2:20 am
16683 spacer
My bumhole is itchy and I don't know why.

I don't want to scratch it because bumholey fingers.

This is a dilemma.
>> No. 16684 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 3:01 am
16684 spacer
>>16683
Wipe it with loo roll.
>> No. 16685 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 3:02 am
16685 spacer
>>16684
I did. It's still itching. I think I may have been love and cherished without my knowledge or consent.

I have a fried egg sandwich now though, so all is well with the world.
>> No. 16686 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 6:57 am
16686 spacer
>>16683>>16685
I think there's a few tests for worms, like putting tape over your arsehole overnight, you may wish to try if you keep itching.
>> No. 16687 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 9:09 am
16687 spacer
>>16683
Bumlice
>> No. 16688 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 2:17 pm
16688 spacer
>>16683

Sounds like you've got piles.
>> No. 16689 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 3:08 pm
16689 spacer
>>16683
Sometimes it just itches. Alternatively if you eat a lot of bread/wheat this can happen.
>> No. 16690 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 4:45 pm
16690 spacer
>>16686>>16687>>16688>>16689

I thank you both for your outpouring of help regarding my itchy bumhole. I do in fact have a haemorrhoid so it was probably that kicking up a fuss. I'm sure you'll be pleased to hear that the itching has stopped now. Much love.
>> No. 16692 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 4:49 pm
16692 spacer
>>16690
Can't be too careful. I am an expert in bumholes and I suggest you let me come and inspect your bumhole with my mouth medical instruments.
>> No. 16693 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 5:26 pm
16693 spacer
My dad has been doing two quite irritating things lately. One is buying pre-sliced cheese. It's absolutely unnecessary, pre-grated I could understand, because grating things is pain and washing the grater is too. But pre-sliced is haram and it's not even very nice cheese, just horrid, nutty, north European guff.

Second is his weird habit of just opening windows, which I wouldn't mind if it weren't giant spider season (which quite like living on window frames btw). And giant spider season is mid autumn, so there's not exactly a heatwave on.
>> No. 16694 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 5:37 pm
16694 spacer
>>16692

https://www.youtube.com/v/7nJzF6qqUQM

Sorry, I couldn't help it. And by 'it', I mean performing an unconventional diagnostic procedure on your arsehole, obviously. Arse. This joke is really wearing thin, isn't it? ARE STEW would be proud. Not someone who works as ARE STEW. ARE STEW.
>> No. 16695 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 8:56 pm
16695 spacer
>>16683
Get thee some sudocrem.
>> No. 16696 Anonymous
2nd October 2014
Thursday 10:42 pm
16696 spacer
Giffgaff just slyly upped the cost of their unlimited internet by £3 per month. Hits. Yes, I'm poor.
>> No. 16697 Anonymous
3rd October 2014
Friday 9:01 am
16697 spacer
>>16696
Glad I finally see this posted.

£15 for unlimited internet isn't that bad, but it's only for people that actually use it - the £12 was good, but I remember only using it to stream music, something that can easily be circumvented if you just download it to your phone.

The new change couldn't have come at a better time - with all the new uni students getting free sims at all the freshers fairs. I've personally started cycling to work, so I don't nearly listen as much streamed music as I used to.

I never even scratched 2.1 GB when I was using it in full swing, so it's a false economy.

The £10 sounds alright - 1 GB internet, but £7.50 has a massive drop-off to 250 MB.
>> No. 16698 Anonymous
3rd October 2014
Friday 9:27 am
16698 spacer
>>16697
More of a /101/ is the general state of mobile Internet in this country. I don't think anyone should be able to provide both home and mobile telephony because of the obvious conflict of interest involved. That 'tethering' is even considered a thing is a travesty. Data is data is data. It shouldn't matter how you pull it down.
>> No. 16718 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 12:11 pm
16718 spacer
A captive wifi gateway page just asked for my mobile number with the following justification
>Why do you need my mobile number?
>It's a legal requirement that we validate your phone number.
Oh well. Looks like I won't be signing up George Osborne to this service today.
>> No. 16720 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 5:14 pm
16720 spacer
>>16718
I use free wifi on buses, they never asked for a number, they asked for name and email, which I filled in with fake details. No problems yet.
>> No. 16721 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 5:59 pm
16721 spacer
So it seems Vodafone have deemed .gs inappropriate for me to visit and have blocked it via their content control service. I could just phone them up and get them to unblock it but it's a work iPad so i don't know if that will work or if it's even something I should do. I'm instead just using Opera Mini which bypasses it, and it actually seems to be a nice little browser. Silver linings and all that.
>> No. 16722 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:06 pm
16722 spacer
>>16721
>but it's a work iPad
Do your bosses know they're paying for you to post here on their equipment using their data allowance?
>> No. 16723 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:13 pm
16723 spacer
Miserly bastards.

>>16722

Oh, bloody hell.
>> No. 16724 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:16 pm
16724 spacer
>>16721
Orange used to sporadically block .gs when I was on PAYG, but I don't think they have since I moved to a contract.
>> No. 16725 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:21 pm
16725 spacer
>>16722

Why would they care, as long as he stays within his allowance?
>> No. 16726 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:23 pm
16726 spacer
>>16724
The main difference is that when you're on contract, they actually bother remembering your choice. With EE it started as blocked, then went through a phase of not being blocked, then for a while they couldn't make up their mind, so the site would load with bits missing, as every other image was met with their blocked page.
>> No. 16727 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:24 pm
16727 spacer
>>16725
Stop taking the bait.
>> No. 16728 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:29 pm
16728 spacer
>>16725
They're paying for it. They're entitled to care if they do choose.
>> No. 16729 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 6:59 pm
16729 spacer
>>16728

I asked why they would care, not if they were entitled to or not.
>> No. 16730 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 7:00 pm
16730 spacer
I used to browse porn at home on my work laptop on my internship, heavily securitised.

I still work there sometimes and it's rather embarrassing to think that's likely all being monitored.
>> No. 16731 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 7:06 pm
16731 spacer
>on my internship, heavily securitised.

Do you know Bill Clinton?
>> No. 16732 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 7:11 pm
16732 spacer
>>16731
It did defence development.
>> No. 16733 Anonymous
4th October 2014
Saturday 7:34 pm
16733 spacer
>>16729
>I asked why they would care
And I gave you an answer, you illiterate shitstain.
>> No. 16734 Anonymous
5th October 2014
Sunday 11:43 am
16734 spacer
Hand eye coordination, specifically the way every cunt seems to have it except me. I've just walked out halfway through my CBT because I couldn't turn in a cunting bastard circle or ride in a straight line. If you've ever felt like the most useless cunt in the world, have no fear, I'm here.
>> No. 16735 Anonymous
5th October 2014
Sunday 9:29 pm
16735 spacer
The guy playing Hitler in some cruddy More4 documentary looks more like the landlord from Rising Damp.
>> No. 16737 Anonymous
7th October 2014
Tuesday 1:47 am
16737 spacer
If he doesn't turn off his car alarm, I'm going to take out the battery and club his entire household to death with it.
>> No. 16738 Anonymous
7th October 2014
Tuesday 1:51 am
16738 spacer
>>16737

Bugger me, do you live on my street, Otherlad? Whoever it was just turned off, thus saving himself from a battery-bludgeoning.
>> No. 16739 Anonymous
7th October 2014
Tuesday 8:37 am
16739 spacer
>>16737
Replace car with ducks and I have the same issue. The cunt has been quacking for well over an hour since 7 am. I'm tempted to take matters into my own hands.
>> No. 16783 Anonymous
8th October 2014
Wednesday 11:08 pm
16783 spacer
>>16737
>>16738

There's some cunt in my are who's house alarm persistently and repeatedly goes off, sometimes in the middle of the day, sometimes at night, but whenever it goes off it just gets left until it turns off by itself (presumably there's a timer, but I haven't measured it.)

What astounds me is how none of this person's neighbours have seen fit to tell them that their alarm keeps going off, and it does go off for a long time, usually about 30 minutes I think, or otherwise taken action about it. Maybe it's a pet or something that keeps tripping it. Maybe one of the sensors is dodgy. Because they certainly aren't getting broken into this often.

I can imagine if it was me living next door to this tosser I would have just gone up on a ladder and ripped the battery out myself- The ignorant cunt would never know after all.
>> No. 16784 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 7:59 am
16784 spacer
This is turning into something more than minor, really.

I'm paying £100 a week for this room. Every morning, 5.30am, I'm woken up by a dripping noise from the pipes. Some prick at maintenance filed it as "non-urgent" which pretty much means they'll come and fix it when they can be arsed as far as I'm aware. I hope they have to hear it, every morning, for weeks. If it goes on for much longer I've a mind to rip out the fucking pipes, sod the fucking building.
>> No. 16786 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 6:31 pm
16786 spacer
The Duke of Lancaster's Regiment being on drills in the Baltic, is not "local" news.
>> No. 16788 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 7:55 pm
16788 spacer
>>16784
You're meant to keep complaining about it.
>> No. 16789 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 7:59 pm
16789 spacer
>>16784
Have you tried muffling the pipe, wrapping some old t-shirts around it or something? It wouldn't be a fix but might lessen the impact it's having.
>> No. 16790 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 8:11 pm
16790 spacer
I have this afternoon received an email from Virgin inviting me to partake of 6 months free Netflix. Buried in the legal terms:
>Voucher must be redeemed by 30 September 2014.
>> No. 16791 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 10:36 pm
16791 spacer
>>16790
If you genuinely want to take advantage of the offer I don't see why they wouldn't reissue you a voucher if you pointed this out to them.
>> No. 16792 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 10:42 pm
16792 spacer
Soft drinks priced almost the same as booze.

At my sports club it's £2.50 for a pint of (proper) beer and £1.80 for lime squash with soda.

I know the money goes back into the club but come the fuck on.
>> No. 16794 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 10:57 pm
16794 spacer
>>16792
£2.50 ? Are you from the 90s?
>> No. 16795 Anonymous
9th October 2014
Thursday 10:58 pm
16795 spacer
>>16794
It's a fucking sports club m8, drinking in legit pubs is for mugs.
>> No. 16799 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 12:47 am
16799 spacer
>>16794
£2.50 a pint is pretty expensive for a club. Around my way you'll be paying under £2 in any building whose name ends in RFC.
>> No. 16800 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 12:49 am
16800 spacer
>>16799
Well mine has carpeted floors and a live-in steward to stop our shit getting stolen so it's a fair deal. We're probably subbing the younguns too but that's part of the deal.
>> No. 16802 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 9:05 am
16802 spacer
Car insurance.

Why the fuck do they still want to charge me £1000 a year to insure a group 1 car I bought for £800 and drive about 2k miles in a year? I'm 26, they told me it got cheap once you hit 25.
>> No. 16803 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 9:12 am
16803 spacer
>>16802

Also it's £200 more if I don't lie about my job title.
>> No. 16804 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 10:54 am
16804 spacer
People who start sentences and stop speaking around 75% of the way through. Am I supposed to guess the fucking ending?
>> No. 16805 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 11:07 am
16805 spacer
>>16804

I think you posted before typing out the last 5 words, lad.
>> No. 16806 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 11:26 am
16806 spacer
>>16802
Try a different provider. Elephant/admiral are fairly generous for me.
>> No. 16807 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 11:31 am
16807 spacer
>>16802
Aviva tried getting me to renew for £440 (I'm 26 and drive a Seat Ibiza) when it was about £360 last year. I rang them up and they knocked £100 off, but I've gone with Octagon for just over £310 and I did it through Top Cash Back and got £30 that way.
>> No. 16808 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 4:08 pm
16808 spacer
The chavlad in front of me who was filling up at a busy garage-supermarket at lunchtime. Filled his car, then did a bunch of shopping and got a cup of coffee whilst holding up the pumps. The transit directly behind him got so fed up of waiting that he tried to reverse out and a right fucking mess ensued.

Inconsiderate cunt.
>> No. 16809 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 5:34 pm
16809 spacer
>>16802

Depends on your postcode as well. I moved from a quiet suburban part of Birmingham to a small town, my insurance dropped by almost £200 overnight.

>>16807
Increasing the cost for no reason after renewal seems to be a common trick to get more money out of you. The majority of people don't know what they're paying anyway, the few people who notice will usually phone up, ask why it's increased and get given some money off and walk away feeling satisfied.
The type of people who will shop around for a good deal are more likely to leave for another provider at the time of renewal so at the end of the day sneaky price rises earn the insurer money and lose them practically no customers.

>The chavlad in front of me who was filling up at a busy garage-supermarket at lunchtime. Filled his car, then did a bunch of shopping and got a cup of coffee whilst holding up the pumps. The transit directly behind him got so fed up of waiting that he tried to reverse out and a right fucking mess ensued.
Turning petrol stations into corner shops is one of the worst things that's happened to this country. I live right next door to one and I've managed to avoid the temptation to even pop in for a pint of milk when I've needed one, purely out of principal. I'll probably give in one day though, shit coffee with a free pain au chocolate on a Sunday morning is very tempting.
>> No. 16810 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 5:37 pm
16810 spacer
>>16808
Don't hate the playa, hate the game. And by that, I mean blame the greedy coffee-selling petrol station that encourages this kind of pump-hogging.

I recommend we start a Campaign for Real Petrol Stations (CAMRPS?) , that only sell fuel and a modest selection of chocolate bars by the till itself. No general groceries and no hot beverages!!
>> No. 16811 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 5:47 pm
16811 spacer
>>16810

Petrol stations make almost nothing on fuel - usually about 3p a litre. The shop is the business, the fuel is just there to get you through the doors.
>> No. 16812 Anonymous
10th October 2014
Friday 8:54 pm
16812 spacer
>>16809
> I've managed to avoid the temptation to even pop in for a pint of milk when I've needed one, purely out of principal.
Nice one m8, those petrol station twats won't know wot hit em.
>> No. 16815 Anonymous
11th October 2014
Saturday 12:57 am
16815 spacer
>>16810

We should bring milkmen back, except instead of milk, it's petrol. He can also furnish you with rags and Zippo lighters.
>> No. 16817 Anonymous
11th October 2014
Saturday 6:23 am
16817 spacer
I can't waste my nights and early mornings on this place any more thanks to the FUCKING CHILD PORN EVERYWHERE. FUCK.
>> No. 16819 Anonymous
11th October 2014
Saturday 3:34 pm
16819 spacer
>>16810
But they've provided a parking lot on one side and plenty of space on the other so that people can fill up and move before going in. There's no excuse.
>> No. 16820 Anonymous
11th October 2014
Saturday 4:43 pm
16820 spacer
>>16817
Have you considered not clicking on it?
>> No. 16821 Anonymous
12th October 2014
Sunday 10:20 pm
16821 spacer
I live in one of a group of half a dozen tower blocks with a gated entrance. While we don't need to brandish fobs to get the exit gate to open, it takes 42 seconds to open wide enough to actually get a fucking car through it. Forty-two whole seconds. Bit of a first-world problem, I know.
>> No. 16822 Anonymous
12th October 2014
Sunday 11:36 pm
16822 spacer
>>16820
Nothing to do with clicking on it, some worthless bored cunt is spamming every board with them. It's sickening and dangerous, I can't go onto the /sfw/ in work at all, for fear of getting caught, or worse, getting it logged onto some network monitor. I nearly had a fucking aneurysm when out of habit I clicked on .gs, and I was faced with a wall of the filth - in a full office no less. I never closed a window so fucking fast in my life.
>> No. 16823 Anonymous
12th October 2014
Sunday 11:51 pm
16823 spacer
>>16822
I'm not sure why CP is really so much worse than the usual talk of beefy poz loads etc. in terms of 'shit I don't want people in the office to see'.
>> No. 16824 Anonymous
12th October 2014
Sunday 11:53 pm
16824 spacer
>>16823
Maybe it's something to do with the potentially career-ending consequences of being caught.
>> No. 16825 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 12:00 am
16825 spacer
>>16824
Why the fuck would you waste your time talking to this cunt?
>> No. 16826 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 12:52 am
16826 spacer
>>16817>>16823
>>16825

I've said this before and I'll say it again. I'll admit that I haven't seen any "category 5" (as described by another user) CP on this board (thank allah) but I have seen images of undressed girls that I'd rather not see (illegal or not is debatable). The main point is that I (and I doubt most other users) do not want to see naked kids on the britfa.

So, mods: there are probably some quite nice tricks you can apply to the image upload code that'll stop a lot of this. One is to collect md5 or sha sums of the offending images and compare these to newly upload images. Sha512 would be preferable simply for the lower probability of collision.

A second option would be to submit hashes of uploaded images to "known bad images" checkers. A bunch of Utter twats spooks called Team Cymru run a service where you supply an md5 hash and they tell you if the file is malware. I know that Google have a massive database of all known child abuse images and do hash compares to all attachments sent via Gmail (this is public knowledge btw), I have no idea if they supply a public interface to this API or if they ever intend to though.

Finally it's possible to analyse images for tell-tail elements such as a given text string, large percentage of skin tone colour etc. Obviously this is a lot more work and not an exact science.

A final possibility would be to tineye and reverse image search the images - if they come back as posted at dodgy urls then don't allow the image. Harsh, but effective.

All of that said, if you find a way (it really shouldn't be that hard) to extract text from the image and match it to the spammed domains that's your best bet.

I have quite a lot of experience with this crap (unfortunately) so if I can be of any help let me know, etc.
>> No. 16827 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 1:30 am
16827 spacer
>>16824>>16825
All I'm saying is that even without the cp I wouldn't consider britfa as sfw, even minus the obvious porn boards. I'd rather we recognised that and let the mods do their thing on the outrageous stuff than any techno-fascist policy a la >>16826
>> No. 16828 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 2:02 am
16828 spacer
>>16827
Paedolad, could you stop shitting up the board with your fucking child porn images?
>> No. 16829 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 3:23 am
16829 spacer
>>16827

> any techno-fascist policy a la >>16826

Christ lad. Really? I'm not sure if you know what fascist means. I'm not sure if you know what "techno[logy]" means.

If you'd rather that unsavoury imagery be openly uploaded and displayed on this board, you only have to say so. Or just fuck off somewhere else.

Sorry mods. I tried my best. Some cunts I just can't deal with
>> No. 16830 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:28 am
16830 spacer

Capture.jpg
168301683016830
>>16823

It's kind of beyond regular NSFW isn't it? This is from the Citizen's Advice Bureau. I didn't see the bit on their page where it said

>If you know someone has read about beefy poz loads, contact the police.
>> No. 16831 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 9:07 am
16831 spacer
>>16829
>unsavoury imagery be openly uploaded and displayed on this board
Yeah, because the mods never delete that shit ever, do they? It's not like they ban the people posting it either, right? Tedious twatbag.
>> No. 16832 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 9:30 am
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>>16831

I think the issue is mods aren't here all the time so CP needs extra steps other than being deleted within about an hour or whatever. I don't know if a thumbnail in your cache counts as downloading it, but a lot of people find the issue very emotive and won't believe anyone has looked at it for any reason other than titillation.
>> No. 16833 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 10:13 am
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I've lost my only piece of waterproof clothing, and it's pissing down, which basically means I refuse to leave the house and do the important shit that needs doing today. Well I say lost, I'm pretty certain I know where it is but I can't get there without getting soaked. Fucking British weather, it's all going downhill for the next few months lads.
>> No. 16835 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 10:17 am
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>>16832
I think you'd need to be a bit braindead to think that one or two thumbnails makes you paedo of the century.

Personally I just avoid any kind of imageboard when I'm at work for the reason that literally anything could be posted, this place is mostly safer than 4chan and the like but it's still from the same family like it or not.
>> No. 16836 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 10:28 am
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>>16835

>I think you'd need to be a bit braindead to think that one or two thumbnails makes <i>you</i> paedo of the century.

Plainly we wouldn't think that but we might have Daily Mail reading co-workers.
>> No. 16837 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 10:37 am
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>>16832
None has been posted since the wall went up. It's not a water-tight solution but should decrease the amount that gets posted significantly.
>> No. 16838 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 10:49 am
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>>16837

I know. I was just trying to explain to the other lad why I think CP's in a category apart from regular NSFW content.
>> No. 16839 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 11:31 am
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>>16832
Just report and hide. Any network log will show a twelve digit number, just like any other image here. Anyone who is actually inspecting the images should spot all the text on it and realise it was probably a spam advert. As for normal people, I trust nobody here is stupid enough to leave this place on display at work unattended.
>> No. 16840 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 5:26 pm
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>>16839
You can't hide individual posts on this site because the admin is daft.

And yeah I don't browse .GS at work, if someone asked me 'why are you hanging around on a site that has child pornography posted on it?' I would have no good answer.
>> No. 16841 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 5:28 pm
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>>16840

>I would have no good answer.
"For the banter" would suffice.
>> No. 16843 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 6:25 pm
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>>16840
>You can't hide individual posts on this site
If the OP is CP spam do you really want to see the rest of the thread?
>> No. 16844 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 6:27 pm
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>>16841
I'd go with "Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?"
>> No. 16845 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 6:27 pm
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>>16841

Too wordy. Try "bantz, obvs".
>> No. 16846 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 7:34 pm
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>>16845

What about "#bantz"?
>> No. 16847 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:06 pm
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>>16843
What the fuck are you on about? My point is that if someone posted CP within a thread you wouldn't be able to hide those posts.

Fucking hell, what is your problem?
>> No. 16848 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:11 pm
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>>16843
>>16847

https://www.youtube.com/v/YPIsTKpAoE4
>> No. 16849 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:17 pm
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>>16847
The recent flood, which people have been asking about, was composed entirely of OPs. No need to have a teary, you dense bumder.
>> No. 16850 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:30 pm
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>>16849
I wish I had a hide tool so I could just get your moronic drivel out of my sight.

Maybe the site admins will wait for someone to start posting cheese pizza in active threads before they get their shit together.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 16851 Anonymous ## Mod ##
13th October 2014
Monday 8:36 pm
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>>16850

I have the perfect solution for you.
>> No. 16852 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:43 pm
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I just realised this gubbins wasn't even taking place on /shed/; a /101/ all of its own there.

Also /101/ing my balls is having to buy 2 pairs of gloves every winter, because I'm a dickhead who loses a pair every 2 months or so.
>> No. 16853 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:55 pm
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>>16852
I remember trying and failing to buy gloves in Halfords in late February a few years ago. We were deep in the middle of one of the coldest winters for a few years but "we're on our summer lines now, innit".
>> No. 16854 Anonymous
13th October 2014
Monday 8:59 pm
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>>16850
That isn't a hide tool for child abuse images hosted on your website you dense doing-it-for-free spaffgobbler.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 16857 Anonymous
14th October 2014
Tuesday 11:59 pm
16857 spacer
Tried to sign up at royalmail.com so I can sort out a mail redirection. I got the following error:
>The page isn't redirecting properly

I don't want to do it in person because then I'd have to queue up for fucking 45 minutes on my lunch break because the cunts open after I start work and close before I finish.

On a similar note, I need to send one and only one piece of mail, but nowhere seems to be able to sell me one and only one stamp. I wonder how much Royal Mail make from all the people who buy books of stamps from the corner shop to use one and never get around to the rest.
>> No. 16864 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 6:51 pm
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I went to a pedestrian crossing earlier, pressed the button for the green man and then someone else (who was a few steps behind me) went to the button on the other side of the path and pressed that even though it was illuminated to show one of the crossing buttons had been pressed. It's like he didn't trust my button pushing credentials.
>> No. 16865 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 7:47 pm
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I've read IMHO twice now on the front page of /*/. Ugh.
>> No. 16866 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 7:48 pm
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>>16864
My housemate a couple of years ago was adamant that the more buttons pressed at once, the faster the lights change. He was told this by someone used to go round repairing them.

He was a autistic type of lad though who would generally believe anything he was told, and I saw that it was often the case that people would just say any old random shite because they got bored of talking to him.
>> No. 16867 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 7:52 pm
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>>16866
They only go faster if you press the special bits for blind people.
>> No. 16868 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 8:12 pm
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168681686816868
>>16864

This crossing's lights always did the exact same sequence with the green man coming on regularly whether anyone had pushed the button or not. I still liked to push it as a placebo.

>>16866

Was that a legitimate zebra-crossing repairman? That sounds like it could have been a leg-pull in itself.
>> No. 16869 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 10:32 pm
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>>16867

Unless they are on a timer, you can actually force a green man by pressing the button and then turning the dial under the unit away from you.
>> No. 16871 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 10:41 pm
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>>16869
On this site you're welcome to read about how much of a gullible prick you are.
http://radixtraffic.co.uk/products/rotating-cone-tactile-equipment.html

Or if you'd prefer it to be summarised for your easy digestion.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-ouch-22706881
>> No. 16872 Anonymous
15th October 2014
Wednesday 11:28 pm
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>>16871
You receive 2 smug points. [OK]
>> No. 16873 Anonymous
16th October 2014
Thursday 12:08 am
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>>16871

Honestly lad, have a word with yourself.
>> No. 16876 Anonymous
16th October 2014
Thursday 12:25 am
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168761687616876
>>16871
>> No. 16879 Anonymous
16th October 2014
Thursday 8:23 pm
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Countdown has become unwatchable in recent weeks due to the domination of a miserable little 14-year-old sperglord, who seems to be incapable of smiling or showing any emotion whatsoever other than aloof, infuriating smugness. He's won the past five or 6 programs scoring well over 100 points every time, and the look of bored, indifferent, "this-game-is too-trivial-for my-colossal-intellect" arrogance he adopts after solving a numbers game in about 0.5 seconds makes me want to punch his smug little face in. Why are all these 'child prodigy' types such insufferable little pricks?
>> No. 16880 Anonymous
16th October 2014
Thursday 8:38 pm
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>>16879

Same reason the children of some of the super rich are like that, I'd wager. They basically raise themselves. His homelife is probably shit.
>> No. 16881 Anonymous
17th October 2014
Friday 2:22 pm
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On the radio this morning someone described the West Bank as, "that place where Israel and the Palestinians like to have a go at each other".
>> No. 16883 Anonymous
17th October 2014
Friday 5:48 pm
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>>16881
What's wrong with that? Or are you saying they used that description only because they were unable to remember its name?
>> No. 16884 Anonymous
17th October 2014
Friday 7:13 pm
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>>16881
It makes it sound so serious. It's just a bit of playful banter between the two.
>> No. 16885 Anonymous
18th October 2014
Saturday 12:04 am
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>>16883>>16884

No, he said "the West Bank is...", and then described it as such.

It's just a bit like describing Mein Kampf as "that book where Hitler goes on one".
>> No. 16886 Anonymous
18th October 2014
Saturday 11:54 am
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Not related to anything said above but one thing that absolutely CUNTS me off is Adobe and their absolutely disgusting huckster trading methods. You used to be able to purchase a once off licence for a product, fucking expensive - as imagined, but I thought that they may have some common sense and just start selling cheaper. And they do, for a monthly indefinite subscription.

I know there are other vector editors out there, but unfortunately Adobe is the most superior - one where I'm most familiar with.

Fuck it then, I'll keep pirating it.
>> No. 16887 Anonymous
18th October 2014
Saturday 12:19 pm
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>>16886
>Fuck it then, I'll keep pirating it.
Adobe don't care, as long as you get your future employers to pony up.
>> No. 16891 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 12:25 pm
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I have two completely unrelated minor rants today.

The first is drivers who queue up at a petrol station where the pumps are spaced over 3 cars apart, and don't realise that if the front pump is free they can drive down the middle to get to it.

Secondly is when you're looking for recipes, and almost every recipe says to add garlic. The vast majority of the time it's personal taste and you can use it or leave it out, it's just slightly annoying that there seems to be so many chefs who add garlic to absolutely everything without thinking about it.
>> No. 16892 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 12:51 pm
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>>16891

I add garlic to everything because I can't taste it anyway and it seems to be good for you.
>> No. 16893 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 1:03 pm
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>>16891

Garlic is a staple flavour in western cooking, just as onions or even salt and pepper. Every indian recipe has ginger in it, kind of the same thing. It's not for lack of creativity that so many chefs use garlic, it's because it tastes good and works with the flavour profiles of most western produce.
>> No. 16894 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 1:03 pm
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>>16891

Garlic is a staple flavour in western cooking, just as onions or even salt and pepper. Every indian recipe has ginger in it, kind of the same thing. It's not for lack of creativity that so many chefs use garlic, it's because it tastes good and works with the flavour profiles of most western produce.
>> No. 16895 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 1:29 pm
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I try to like garlic, I generally like eating it as long as it's well cooked. It's just after eating it I can smell garlic on my skin for days, especially if I did the cooking and handled it raw. I don't want to smell like a fucking Frenchman.

It's true that it is a staple in mainland Europe and particularly Mediterranean cooking, but not in British food. I can't argue with a recipe book saying add garlic to a tagine or to a bolognese, the problem is when you turn a few pages in the book and they're adding garlic to a beef casserole.
>> No. 16896 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 1:46 pm
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>>16895
>I can smell garlic on my skin for days, especially if I did the cooking and handled it raw
Buy a tube of garlic puree and use that instead.

Also, Swarfega.
>> No. 16897 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 1:49 pm
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>>16896
That still doesn't solve the problem of garlic making people smell just from having eaten it.
>> No. 16898 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 2:06 pm
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>>16895

We've had wild garlic in Britain before the romans ever even showed a bulb of the stuff. The oldest surviving cookbook from this country include a recipe for garlic chicken. Let's face it, garlic is english as fuck. You don't smell like a frenchman, you smell like Richard II.
>> No. 16899 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 2:07 pm
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>>16897

I eat a lot of garlic and only knew this was a thing until I mentioned how much garlic I eat to a work colleague and he said he had never smelled it on me.

I've smelled it off other people though since then, definitely.
>> No. 16900 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 2:44 pm
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>>16898

Didn't chickens come from Vietnam?
>> No. 16901 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 2:49 pm
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>>16900
The Romans would have brought chickens with them, if they weren't around in Britain before them.

They brought rabbits with them too.
>> No. 16902 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 9:49 pm
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>>16901
I thought that was our cruel Norman oppressors who imported rabbits to our fair shores.
>> No. 16903 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 10:24 pm
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>>16902

Wasn't that Weasels?
>> No. 16904 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 10:29 pm
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169041690416904
900 years under the Norman Yolk. Never forget.
>> No. 16905 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 10:32 pm
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People going to a wedding, taking pictures on their phones and uploading them to Facebook. It sort of takes the gloss off for me.
>> No. 16906 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 10:35 pm
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>>16905

You're going to hate the last 7 years.
>> No. 16908 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 10:56 pm
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>>16905
Going to weddings at all, what a trite, horrid and crass experience. Fuck off already with getting married.
>> No. 16909 Anonymous
19th October 2014
Sunday 10:58 pm
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>>16908

But it's not true love unless thoroughly rubbed in your face!
>> No. 16910 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 1:14 am
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>>16908

You're looking at it all wrong. It's barely about the couple. Especially if it's a destination wedding, and you're staying over - you're looking at a weekend where you get to wear your best suit and get obscenely drunk with a bunch of women who have been thinking about how they're still not married yet since they got the invitation six months ago.

You've just got to hope for a short ceremony. The last two I went to were in stark contrast - the first was a non denominational union where two people read a poem each, and the couple didn't even read their own vows, just the old "repeat after me" stuff. The whole ceremony was about fifteen minutes, and we were back to drinking scotch and lying to bridesmaids.

The second was in a huge imposing cathedral, it was christian as FUCK, they sang about five hymns, there was a fucking string quartet and a choir, and of course they'd wrote their own vows, and half the family on each side had something to say about the whole ordeal too. That lasted a good two hours, or it certainly felt like it. And because of the deep religious overtones it definitely put off a lot of the talent, but even Jesus used to make wine so they got into it eventually.
>> No. 16911 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 3:49 am
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People who take your reserved seat on a train and that I'm too autistically socially anxious to ask for it when I can just sit in someone else's reserved seat or simply stand up for a good hour.

Can't say I've ever seen a train that wasn't crammed with people to the point of dozens in the aisle and doorways, even as late as 1am. Maybe train companies should do some analysis on how many people actually board a train.
>> No. 16912 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 5:08 am
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>>16911
They do. They don't care so long as they aren't missing out on revenues.

I don't ever have this problem though, every train I go on has loads of space left. Yes I do live in the south east.
>> No. 16913 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 5:09 am
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Also since when do you have reserved seats on trains?
>> No. 16914 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 7:56 am
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A couple of things have started recently annoying me about my fiancée:

a) when she makes the bed she always tucks the duvet under the mattress. I don't know how anyone can sleep like this as it's awful.

b) ever since we got Netflix she's devided that watching DVDs (i.e. films we've seen before) is weird and that we should watch some shite on there we've never heard of, even though 90% of the time it's dire.
>> No. 16915 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 8:59 am
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>>16913
Since at least before you were born.
>> No. 16916 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 11:09 am
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>since when do you have reserved seats on trains?
How could you possibly have missed this? Not been on many trains, I take it?

>when she makes the bed she always tucks the duvet under the mattress. I don't know how anyone can sleep like this as it's awful.
I do this as it keeps my feet warmer.
>> No. 16917 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 11:18 am
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>>16910
I used to work at a lot of weddings , doing catering, planning, bartending, etc. This took place in a fairly posh hotel.

You'll be amazed how cookie cutter most weddings are, in fact we'd get 5 weddings in a week, and the only thing that would change is the table cloth and cutlery. Everything else was so formulaic and choreographed that it putted me off the whole thing. It was especially hard to keep a straight face when the bride and groom to-be came in for the planning, "I want a fairy-tale wedding!!" said the bride with glee and a sparkle in her eyes. Oh you'll get one love, you're couple #241 in line for your McWedding.
>> No. 16918 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 11:21 am
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>>16916
You only see it on popular cross-country routes, no? You could travel by train every day and not know.
>> No. 16919 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 11:34 am
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>>16918
Yeah I think it's only on intercity routes. The only time I saw it was going from Reading to Bristol.
>> No. 16920 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 2:58 pm
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>>16916
I don't think southwest trains let you book seats, nor London overground for obvious reasons. I've only ever seen reserved seats on first capital connect.
>> No. 16921 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 3:04 pm
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>>16920
>first capital connect.

Scratch that, I was actually thinking of Abelia Greater Anglia.

I think given that most people (or maybe just me) get flexible off-peak travel tickets, booking a seat on a particular train has become a bit redundant. My time-awareness is abysmal so it's worth paying a few quid more to know that I can just turn up at the station whenever I feel like, as opposed to inevitably leaving 10 minutes late and making off in a blind panic to try and not miss the one train I'm booked on (which is a /101/ moment all on its own...).
>> No. 16923 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 9:33 pm
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I'm starting to get angry with how we can't speak as we normally would, particularly without the British idioms of understatement and outright sarcasm, in internet discussions. I can't tell whether it's because people are thick or because they are just that eager to start an argument out of sheer boredom, but after all these years it's eventually started getting to me.

I think I'm going to start making long, rambling Stewart Lee style deconstructions of my posts, explaining in a tiresomely thorough fashion the specifics of what I actually genuinely meant, every time some cunt selectively quotes a single sentence and then has a go at me about it. It's the only way forward. I'm sick of arguing semantics with cunts who I essentially agree with, but who thought they'd be a smart-arse and pull me up on using the word "darkies".
>> No. 16924 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 9:48 pm
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>>16923

>darkies
While I agree with the general thrust of your post, I think this sort of casual racism has to stop. You can't just use that word any more, even as a joke. We live in a civilised society where people are treated as equals regarded of how skin tonally challenged they are. I don't think your use of that word is acceptable, and I would like you to stop.
>> No. 16925 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 9:53 pm
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>>16923


It's always been a problem. Emoticons started as a way to prevent misunderstandings, a wink or a sneer smiley can add that extra bit of meaning. Memes and image macros in the style of the other place went beyond that, a meme might be a shitty way of talking to people, but they can be a very effective way of communicating an emotion.
With the popularity of facebook and twitter, these pictorial methods of aiding conversation are being replaced by simply saying any crap you want without the slightest care about whether people misunderstand you or not. If people don't get what you say, just insult them then unfriend them.

However, being misunderstood is lazy writing. With a bit of thought and care you can still convey sarcasm and understatement to some extent. It does help when you know you're communicating with people of a similar mindset which is why I like it here.
>> No. 16926 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 10:55 pm
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>>16924

I respect your opinion, but I'm sorry, no, I won't. I'm of the opinion that a word is just that, a word. It's a selection of letters assembled in a certain way, and the burden of "offence" is entirely on the listener, not the user. It's the intent that matters.

Doug Stanhope does a bit about how he'd be willing to suck off the biggest black guy's dick he can find and take a photo just so he can keep saying the word nigger or faggot, I can't quite remember. That, essentially.

If you constantly teach about the offensive, taboo nature of a word, then you only reinforce its power.

>>16925

Indeed, very true. But there's nothing to stop people misinterpreting you even in real life- I feel like our changing culture and reliance on digital communication is impacting on these more organic kinds of communication negatively. The younglings at my place of work seem to take everything you say at face value even when you do the typical sitcom sarcasm voice. Ehh.
>> No. 16927 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 11:16 pm
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>>16926

I don't think you were very Stewesque there.
>> No. 16928 Anonymous
20th October 2014
Monday 11:39 pm
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>>16927

Well, that's because I'm not. He plays up to a self-righteous lefty image. I'm still a bit of teenlad with a kneejerk reaction to that sort of thing.
>> No. 16929 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 1:04 am
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>>16926
Alright Godfrey, let's straighten this out before you start going on about bongo bongo land again.

>I'm of the opinion that a word is just that, a word.
And like all words, it has a definition, an origin, and a context, things you want to conveniently ignore.

>It's a selection of letters assembled in a certain way
Christ is this the best you can do?

>the burden of "offence" is entirely on the listener, not the user
Which is why the listener is a victim with no choice in the matter of whether they have those words inflicted upon them or not. Which brings us onto...

>It's the intent that matters.
What do you suppose is the 'intent' of the people who shout these things at others in the street? How do you think you're making people feel by reminding people of the oppression they've had to put up with their entire lives? That's what you're doing, and if you refuse to stop after being made aware of this, then that is your intent.

>just so he can keep saying the word nigger or faggot
Why is this so important to you? Why do you insist that you have a 'right' to these offensive, discriminatory terms? Do you really feel it's worth racially or homophobicly abusing huge numbers of people to have them in your post? Who is supposed to be inspired or enlightened or pleased by your use of these words?
>> No. 16930 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 1:29 am
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>>16929

How do you feel when American birds tell you you should never ever under any circumstances say the word cunt?
>> No. 16931 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 1:43 am
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>>16930
That's never happened to me.
>> No. 16933 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 9:53 am
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>>16926

>I respect your opinion, but I'm sorry, no, I won't. I'm of the opinion that a word is just that, a word. It's a selection of letters assembled in a certain way, and the burden of "offence" is entirely on the listener, not the user. It's the intent that matters.

It's quite nice that you've decided that the victim is to blame, and consequently that should shut down all debate about the matter. And I think your treatment of language clearly shows that a word is far more than a word, for you a word is clearly a divine right, an entitlement for you.

Intent is the perfect cover for you too, but you should well know that authorship means fuck all; that author died a long time ago. If you believe that your words come from your mouth and speak only of your intention and your meaning, then you should by all rights, go back to school.
>> No. 16934 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 10:44 am
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>>16929

>bongo bongo land
While I agree with the general thrust of your post, I think this sort of casual racism has to stop. You can't just use that phrase any more, even as a joke. We live in a civilised society where people are treated as equals regarded of how skin tonally challenged they are. I don't think your use of that phrase is acceptable, and I would like you to stop.
>> No. 16935 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 11:48 am
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>>16934
>bongo bongo land

Fucking hell, lads. Not this again. It was bad enough in the /spo/ thread. Bongo bongo land is a word that sounds racist, but there's no actual evidence that it is racist. It's one for the professionally offended.
>> No. 16936 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 1:16 pm
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>>16934
Er, but I didn't use the phrase. Godfrey Bloom did. That's the point. I'm not arguing for the right to call places bongo bongo land, unlike the other lad who is arguing for the right to call people darkies. You really don't understand what you're talking about.
>> No. 16937 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 1:20 pm
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You'll all laugh when you get it.
>> No. 16938 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 2:26 pm
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>>16929
It's interesting how I always hear "You can't say that because xyz might find it offensive." as opposed to "I find that offensive, please stop using that word."
>> No. 16939 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 4:01 pm
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>>16938
That could be for several reasons. Maybe most people have enough sense not to say things they know someone might be offended by in the presence of someone who they know might be offended by them. Or maybe your social circles aren't diverse and you just don't encounter anyone who would be offended. Or maybe the people that are offended don't feel they have enough support to speak up and be listened to - after all, in most cases they're the ones being oppressed by the casual use of these terms, so under that pressure it takes a lot of courage to break a silence.

But how is this relevant when someone in the thread has already said they find 'darkies' offensive themselves and now we're discussing whether or not even that matters?
>> No. 16940 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 4:14 pm
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>>16939
It's so tedious reading shit like this over and over again.
>> No. 16941 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 4:49 pm
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>>16939

The person who took offence to the word darkies probably wasn't a darky themselves though- So who made them judge and jury over whether it is offensive or not?

I have had black friends who were perfectly fine with me calling them nigger, because half the time it was a Pulp Fiction quote and the other half the time it was part of our running joke about being gangsta thugz. When I worked in a call centre I would hear the word paki thrown about several times a day between Indians and Pakistanis in a kind of friendly rivalry, end even between some of the more well liked white people. It all depends on context.

This irrational fear for the power of words is exclusively the domain of self-flagellating middle class lefties, and really, it's fucking patronising to the people they trying to stand up for.
>> No. 16942 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 4:53 pm
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>>16941

Original person who pretended to be offended at the word darkie here. If you look closely at my post you will see that it was a bit of a play on what he'd said about people agreeing with him but pulling him up on the word darkies.

Fuck me, you lot.
>> No. 16943 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 4:55 pm
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>>16942

I know lad, but now I've become caught up in the actual debate that's sprung up so... Your joke was a martyr, my apologies.
>> No. 16944 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 7:14 pm
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>>16939
>after all, in most cases they're the ones being oppressed by the casual use of these terms, so under that pressure it takes a lot of courage to break a silence.

Wow, you really are delusional. I guess you imagine these hypothetical offended people will be eternally grateful when you bravely step in and save them from the oppression of a non politically-correct word, before you leave after a quick tip of the fedora and a m'lady of course.
>> No. 16945 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 7:58 pm
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Jesus Christ, this is the 3 Stooges of taste debates. What was it? 5 posts before you idiots got confused and forgot who was joking who?

Oh, that's a good /101/ actually, people arguing in the "Minor Rants" thread.
>> No. 16946 Anonymous
21st October 2014
Tuesday 8:57 pm
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>>16940
Oh yeah because 'it's political correctness gone mad' is really fresh to these boards.
>> No. 16947 Anonymous
22nd October 2014
Wednesday 1:22 pm
16947 spacer
Undated web articles, especially when they contain information that is subject to change.
>> No. 16948 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 3:49 pm
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Calling BT gets you a human (or an Indian impersonating one) in 30 seconds if you say you want to buy something, but 30 minutes if there's a fault. If you try the trick of lying about why you're calling, they just redirect you to the back of the queue. Also, they won't cover my phone bill for spending three weeks trying to sort out my senile disabled nan's phone after they cut her off twice by mistake, but that's a /101/ all of its own.
>> No. 16949 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 4:25 pm
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>>16948
This fits within the catchall BT /101/ of
BT: Cunts.

In every way, every day. Every contact with them ends badly.
>> No. 16950 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 6:03 pm
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>>16949
On the last call I had with them about compensation, the wall of text their agent was regurgitating filled me with an almost irresistable urge to resort to a Goodfellas-style "fuck you, pay me".
>> No. 16951 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 8:04 pm
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>>16948

Where you calling off a mobile? Have you looked into VOIP? It's a wonderful thing. Last time the DWP kept me on hold for 45 minutes, it cost 45p.
>> No. 16952 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 8:13 pm
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>>16951
A decent mobile provider would charge nothing for that 45 minute call provided you hadn't exhausted your allowance.
>> No. 16953 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 8:19 pm
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>>16952

I thought they were iffy about 0845s. I don't use mobiles often enough to warrant a contract.
>> No. 16954 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 8:20 pm
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>>16952
Have you ever dealt with such organisations and not exhausted your allowance?
>> No. 16955 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 8:29 pm
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>>16953
https://www.gov.uk/government/news/dwp-helps-cut-telephone-call-costs-from-march-2014
>> No. 16956 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 8:48 pm
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>>16955

I think it costs me about 20p a minute pay-as-you-go, but even so, if I put £10 on, it tends to last about three months so it's cheaper than a contract. VOIP's a great solution if you use phones infrequently.
>> No. 16957 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 9:20 pm
16957 spacer
>>16956
Maybe things have changed, but when I was looking into it VoIP was one of the things that mobile operators almost invariably blocked (for obvious reasons).
>> No. 16958 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 9:50 pm
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SPA112_large.png
169581695816958
>>16957

It doesn't involve my mobile. I bought a Cisco SPA112 and it plugs into my router and you connect a normal landline phone to the SPA112. Then I signed up with Voipfone months ago and put £10 on and I still have about £9 left.

It costs me about 1p/min to phone landlines or about 12p/min to phone mobiles.

The tariff's here:

http://www.voipfone.co.uk/prices_new.php

I have an 056 number. Landlines can phone me for the cost of a local call. I don't know about mobiles. I don't think their free minutes cover it but I could get an 0161 number from Voipfone for £2 a month.

I wanted to get with Sipgate because you get the 0161 number for free but it didn't like my Virgin Superhub 2 and I was getting one-way audio. Voipfone is great though.

I think you can get a free trial with Sipgate and they give you about £1 of free credit to try it and you can do it with software and don't necessarily need an adaptor. I didn't have to give them any financial details to get the free credit to try.
>> No. 16959 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 9:54 pm
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>>16956

If that was ambiguous at all I was referring to my PAYG mobile here:

>I think it costs me about 20p a minute pay-as-you-go, but even so, if I put £10 on, it tends to last about three months so it's cheaper than a contract.

and my VOIP "landline" here:

>VOIP's a great solution if you use phones infrequently.
>> No. 16960 Anonymous
24th October 2014
Friday 11:13 pm
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Diwali. I live near a rather large Hindu community and they are lovely in every way possible (were I so inclined I could turn up on any given festival and celebrate along with food and dance), if they are like to get noisy or rowdy (they never do) they'll leaflet the area, the works. Live and let live, they're being splendid neighbours. Now could all of the white arseholes who latched onto this celebration please follow suite and not piss all over the place and drop their trash everywhere? You're not being accepting, you're just using someone else's belief as an excuse to be cunts.
>> No. 16961 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 1:47 am
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>>16960
It didn't work with the Irish, what makes you think it'll work with the Indians?
>> No. 16962 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 10:42 am
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>>16960

It really annoys me that they held a Holi-esque event in my city in the middle of June this year. It was basically an opportunity for students to throw paint at each other in swimwear, but I bet a hindu trying to actually celebrate actual holi would be arrested for vandalism.
>> No. 16963 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 10:56 am
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My friend keeps telling me the nespresso machine I bought doesn't make "real espresso".

1)yes it does
2)I don't give a shit anyway it's a shot of coffee
3)you work in a call centre what the fuck do you know about flavour

I don't know why as a society we still labour under the illusion that taste is entirely objective, but only the enlightened few (which everyone thinks they are) can notice. I've worked in restaurants long enough to know that you taste with your eyes, and your expectations. Your nose and tastebuds merely confirm your initial suspicions.

How many more times do we have to humiliate oenophiles by giving them a chablis with food colouring in it and listen to them describe the deep, rich tannic profiles before we can all just move on as a society and admit we think anything's delicious if a celebrity on the telly says it is?
>> No. 16964 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 11:24 am
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>>16963
> humiliate oenophiles by giving them a chablis with food colouring in it

This is my greatest fear. That I go to a restaurant and buy expensive shit thinking it's top shelf, when lidl wouldn't even stock it in it's bargain bins.
>> No. 16965 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 11:37 am
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>>16964
Only a fool chooses the wine that isn't cheapest on the list. The rest, especially the second cheapest, have even more horrifically inflated margins.
>> No. 16966 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 11:51 am
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>>16964

It used to be mine - I had a crippling fear of being outed as a fraud, by accidentally declaring my love for Tesco value scotch or adding too much salt to my soup - but after serving tens of thousands of plates of food to thousands of people, I've come to realise nobody knows what the fuck they're really talking about, especially those who think they do.

Declaring yourself an expert in something forces you to close your mind, to restrict what you can enjoy safely while still being able to think of yourself as in the know. Someone like my mother will buy two bottles of wine from Aldi for a fiver and enjoy every last sip because to her it's cold and tastes like white wine, she doesn't want anything else and more importantly she doesn't THINK she wants anything better, because a bottle twice the price still is white wine.

No matter how good that wine is (and it's really not bad) no 'wine expert' could ever enjoy it, not fully - they'd have to like it 'for the price' at best. No matter how much they actually like the taste, they won't. Before they've even opened the bottle they know the wine will be inferior, and they cannot and will not allow themselves to enjoy it fully.

I've seen it over an over, any foodie will reject a sauce that has begun to split, no matter how delicious it remains. A good example is a very famous London restaurant ran by a very famous chef - newly opened, his patissier was sending out very, very dark sugar on his creme brules and sugar cages - he was an italian that smoked sixty a day so he liked things bitter. Customers complained. The sugar was not inedible, just much darker than most were used to. Instead of asking the chef to change his method (because he'd likely have refused and quit - he was italian.) he reworded the menu description to 'charred sugar' or some other poncey way of saying burnt. It worked and the complaints turned into compliments and congratulations on the innovation. It's one of those secrets of a kitchen you never hear about in 'secrets of the kitchen' memoirs - it's all in the marketing.

It's a small example but I've seen it work a thousand times. Your vegetables are rustic, not inconsistent. Your wine is lively, not on the turn. Whatever the man in the tall hat and the monogrammed whites tells you, you'll believe. Just as the toothpaste your dentist recommends is the only one that really cleans your teeth.
>> No. 16967 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 11:57 am
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>>16965

Restaurateurs are ten steps ahead of you on that one. Have you not noticed wine lists these days are separated by many discreet subcategories? When was the last time you saw a wine list that was actually in order of price?

The only advice that holds true in this business is never trust your waiter and don't order fish on a monday.
>> No. 16968 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 12:04 pm
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>>16963

I sort of agree with you, taste is subjective, and many people become coffee snobs just to feel good about themselves. However I believe in two main groups of coffee, nice coffee and convenient coffee, both of which have a place in my life. Nespresso tries to do both, and I've never tried it myself to be able to say whether I think they have succeeded. Even if they have achieved both I still reserve the right to look down on anyone who thinks the huge markup in price is justified.

On the matter of the subjectivity of taste, it has a lot to do with ritual. If people grind their own freshly roasted coffee and make a shot in an expensive machine, people will say it tastes better than a machine where you press a button and coffee comes out of a nozzle, even though the chemical composition of the coffee could be identical. And give people a bottle of tesco value wine in a posh restaurant and they'll say that tastes better too.
Some people take examples like this, and tell people that it's all just the same so there's no point at all in buying an espresso machine or buying overpriced wine. But they're missing the most important point, the ritual and the atmosphere might not change the taste in any objective way, but they have a big impact on how you feel and how you perceive the taste.

To get back to the original point, Nespresso might well taste identical to a "real" espresso, but a real espresso with all the associated ritual makes people feel better, siting in a nice restaurant sipping shit wine makes people happier than sitting alone at home drinking a rare 1939 vintage. At the end of the day, isn't making us feel better the whole point?

Your call centre friend might be a bit of a twat, but at least he's a happy twat.


>Just as the toothpaste your dentist recommends is the only one that really cleans your teeth.
Toothpaste adverts really do my head in, they deserve a thread for themselves. Recently colgate came out with "WITH SUGAR ACID NEUTRALISER!" (i.e. baking soda, the magic ingredient that has been in toothpaste since before it came in a tube), and suddenly every customer is only buying toothpaste with sugar acid neutraliser in, so every other brand has had to start writing it on their packaging even though nothing has changed.
>> No. 16969 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 12:30 pm
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>>16968
>But they're missing the most important point, the ritual and the atmosphere might not change the taste in any objective way, but they have a big impact on how you feel and how you perceive the taste.
I remember reading Iain Banks' whisky-tasting guide/autobiography, Raw Spirit. There's a great passage in it where he gets given a bottle of 40-year-old Laphroaig (or something) and sits down with a fellow whisky enthusiast to sample its delights. A few drams later and they're talking it up to each other how about wonderful it is when Banks notices the light hitting the bottle at just the right angle and revealing that the "4" in the "40 years" is actually just a "1" that's been biro'd. His conclusion was essentially the above quote.

I do wonder how many food/drink critics would fall for the same kind of trick.
>> No. 16970 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 1:37 pm
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I was just told to 'educate my self' by watching Russell Brand trews. It's made me so angry.
>> No. 16971 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 1:54 pm
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>>16968

>Your call centre friend might be a bit of a twat, but at least he's a happy twat.

I would contest that. He got too worked up about me buying that stupid machine. If he's that concerned about what other people are doing (like me drinking nespresso) then can he really be happy? I'd imagine if he was truly content with his magic art espresso he'd not give a shit what I was doing, or just bring me to his coffee shop instead of treating a sixty quid coffee maker as an object of disgust.
>> No. 16972 Anonymous
25th October 2014
Saturday 4:25 pm
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>>16969
>I do wonder how many food/drink critics would fall for the same kind of trick.

Essentially all of them. Even professional wine tasters and sommeliers can easily be fooled by simple chicanery like dyeing white wine red.

http://priceonomics.com/is-wine-bullshit/

>>16971

That. It's about social status, not sensual pleasure. Our food culture has become saturated with one-upmanship and a holier-than-thou attitude in which eating local organic food makes you a better human being. People are more concerned about Instagramming their meal than actually enjoying it. It's just another petit-bourgeois fetish, another thing to worry about, another way of getting one over on the Joneses. Last season it was pulled pork, this season it's dirty burgers and Negronis served in jam jars; Next season will undoubtedly bring some new fad for lifestyle columnists to rave about and then decry as passée three weeks later.

If you really want to enjoy food, just pay attention to it. Go to the greengrocers, buy a fresh apple, take it home. Sit at the table in silence, slowly and thoughtfully eating that apple. Don't look out of the window, don't fiddle with your phone, don't think about last night's TV or whether that girl from work fancies you, just concentrate on the apple. Smell the skin, listen to the crunch as you bite into it, feel the texture of the flesh as you chew it. Eat.
>> No. 16973 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 1:37 am
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>>16972

I like you. I like you a lot.

My prediction for 2015, the biggest thing will be high street molecular gastronomy. There are already chain restaurants putting things with alginate and smoke on their winter menus, or adding crystallised chocolate to their desserts.

It will also be the year of the food truck, with the most common offerings being an equal split between latin street food - mostly Cuban and Brazilian - and clumsy attempts at making 'proper british food' into a funky, portable versions. Think yorkshire pudding wraps, hot pot served in cardboard cups and other such horrors. We may see people trying to make oysters in vogue again, but it'll never happen.

This final one is more of a given as it's been slowly burning for a while with things like the aforementioned pulled pork, but we'll be seeing a lot of American classics too. Ribs, BBQ, and other soul food is already on the rise, and it won't be long before we can buy proper Chicago hot dogs and NYC pizza (both of these things I'm actually looking forward to) last but not least, my most specific and damning prediction - by spring you'll be able to buy a doughnut burger in Wetherspoons.
>> No. 16974 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 7:28 am
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>>16973
>Think yorkshire pudding wraps, hot pot served in cardboard cups and other such horrors.

I take it you've never been to Iceland?
>> No. 16975 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 11:31 am
16975 spacer
Uppity car drivers who think cyclists should 'pay road tax like they do'.

You don't pay road tax you stupid cunt, it's an emissions duty.
>> No. 16976 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 12:33 pm
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>>16975
And what about your methane? You're fucking up the ozone layer, you inconsiderate prick.
>> No. 16977 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 12:56 pm
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>>16976
That's quite a weak retort.
>> No. 16978 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 1:04 pm
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>>16975
The bit that really sticks in my craw is how they imply they want to implement a road tax scheme with the filth inspecting every 10th bike or some stupid bullshit.
>> No. 16979 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 2:48 pm
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>>16977
It's a pretty weak joke, but it's the best this hangover allowed for.

Sorry.
>> No. 16980 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 3:38 pm
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>>16975

Personally, I think there's a big element of jealousy about the freedom of two wheels. When I'm on my pushbike, people give me shit about 'road tax'. When I'm on my fully taxed and insured motor scooter, people give me shit about filtering in traffic and parking 'willy nilly' (legally, in spaces where you could never fit a car). Car drivers are naturally resentful of the fact that they pay through the nose for 'the freedom of the open road', only to see people zipping past them in traffic and filtering to the front of queues at traffic lights.
>> No. 16981 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 3:46 pm
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>>16980

I think you're pretty much spot on.

As an aside, my favourite thing to do when a driver beeps at me for daring to cycle on the road is catch up to them at the next set of traffic lights, grin, wave, then zip off at the green faster than their fat little ankles can release the clutch.

I've noticed that if you do this to younger men in flashy cars, they almost always stall in their desperation to not lose a race to a cyclist.
>> No. 16982 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 3:57 pm
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>>16980>>16981

This country need an overhaul in driver/pedestrian attitude and ultimately infrastructure. If you live and work in the same city, and are able bodied, there is absolutely no reason why you can't commute via bike.

Infrastructure is a bloody joke at the moment, it's harrowing having to share a lane with fucking buses and cuntish taxis - it's not a liability I'm willing to risk while going to get milk.
>> No. 16983 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 4:07 pm
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>>16981
>in their desperation to not lose a race to a cyclist.

I was driving earlier and ahead was a gang of about 20 cyclists. They were doing about 35mph (in a 30 zone) but cars kept speeding past them because you could tell they were desperate to overtake.

Sage because we've had this cars-bikes-road tax discussion 10,000,000,000 times.
>> No. 16984 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 6:07 pm
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Robin van Persie scoring in the 93rd minute.
>> No. 16985 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 6:29 pm
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>>14492
My cunting old radiator isn't heating, and my landlord has fucked off for a month. It's 17C right now, and my hands are cold.
>> No. 16986 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 7:18 pm
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>>16985
You should be able to find a halogen heater for a tenner or so.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/1200W-Halogen-Heater-1-2kW-Electric-Oscillating-Heaters-for-Home-or-Office-/221577342461
>> No. 16987 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 7:23 pm
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>>16986
It'll probably come to this, if so - I'll ask him to take it out of my rent. Because the pile of shite I have now is a storage heater from the 80's, thank fuck no asbestos. For some reason British manufacturing took a suicidal plunge around that time.
>> No. 16989 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 7:58 pm
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>>16987
You're wondering why a storage heater isn't heating during peak hours..?
>> No. 16990 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 8:39 pm
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>>16989
No, I thought this too - but I keep it switched on all day and night. It worked once, but after adjusting the "heat output", it's bricked itself.
>> No. 16991 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 11:07 pm
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>>16989

Old storage heaters can be diabolical. I had some which used £5 a day to make the temperature 2°C warmer than it was with no heating at all.
>> No. 16992 Anonymous
26th October 2014
Sunday 11:08 pm
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>>16985

Hey, my radiator is fucked too. This might not be the place to ask, but are there any plumberlads on here? Every other radiator on the system is working fine, but one radiator is completely cold, and there's not even hot water coming up the pipe to the valve. I've tried bleeding it, and it's topped off. That's the extent of my knowledge.
>> No. 16993 Anonymous
27th October 2014
Monday 1:47 am
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>>16992
Might be sludged up, and would need removing and flushing through. That's the extent of my knowledge.
>> No. 16994 Anonymous
27th October 2014
Monday 8:36 pm
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My ears really hurt and I want to go to my GP about them, but the last time I went it was to tell him I was considering suicide. I'm suffering from a medical version of the "difficult second album", if you will.
>> No. 16995 Anonymous
27th October 2014
Monday 8:41 pm
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I've just reached a number with an automated system and been told that they're closed and are only open until 9pm during the week.
>> No. 16996 Anonymous
27th October 2014
Monday 10:48 pm
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>>16994
great post, lad.
>> No. 16997 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 1:14 am
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>>16996

I don't know if you're being sincere, but I put my all into that post. So if you can't appreciate that, you just jug my load, butt-munch.
>> No. 16998 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 11:47 am
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The nearest GP to my new home is about 40 minutes away on for, and doesn't have anywhere for patients to park a car nearby. There's one about five minutes away from where I work but they won't take me because I don't live nearby. I'm on long term medication and have no idea how the fuck I'm supposed to do something as simple as collect a prescription if this keeps up. For too many reasons getting it delivered is not an option.
>> No. 16999 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 11:56 am
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>>16998

Ask your doctor for a 3 month prescription, or see if you can organise having it faxed through to the pharmacy. I really can't see any place in the UK not having parking nearby though.
>> No. 17000 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 12:11 pm
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>>16999
>I really can't see any place in the UK not having parking nearby though.
It's not only central London that has this problem, you know. There is literally no unrestricted parking in that part of town. It's all residents' parking, apart from the odd Blue Badge space, and the local traffic wardens are feral.
>> No. 17001 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 12:30 pm
17001 spacer
AAAOOOOW MMMOOOOIII DAAAAAAIIIIYYYS

Can you southerners do us a favour, and staple all your women's mouths shut?
>> No. 17002 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 12:35 pm
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>>16998

Don't they do electronic prescription transfers in your area? They really push them in mine. They electronically send the prescription straight through to your nominated chemist.
>> No. 17003 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 1:08 pm
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>>17002
>Don't they do electronic prescription transfers in your area?
Some do, some don't. My old practice doesn't, and the more immediate problem now is finding any GP in the first place.
>> No. 17004 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 1:13 pm
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>>17003

Does anyone you work with live in the catchment area of the one near your workplace? Maybe you could use a workmate's address and your own mobile. I doubt they ever check anyone's address. There's even a bit on the back of a prescription which lets you fill out your address if it's different from the one they have on record.
>> No. 17005 Anonymous
28th October 2014
Tuesday 1:24 pm
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>>17004

Could you even use your work address if it doesn't sound too worky? I mean if it's the type of place you could leave off the business name and just write the street number. You only get letters off the NHS after a hospital appointment and I don't remember a doctor's ever asking me for ID to sign up.
>> No. 17026 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 7:32 pm
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Matt Frei (from off the C4 News) just described a Bulgarian man having the wherewithal to use a napkin as, "handling his Big Mac with reverence, like a delicacy". What a horrid, patronising, tool.
>> No. 17027 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 10:04 pm
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BBC4 have ruined some lovely footage of Alice Roberts sleeping by putting damned spiders everywhere.
>> No. 17028 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 10:11 pm
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>>17027

Alice Roberts looks like a Tory wife.
>> No. 17029 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 10:29 pm
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>>17026
If you're in Maccy D's you deserve everything you get.
>> No. 17030 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 10:54 pm
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>>17027

Yeah, but they've just made one very particular fetishist the happiest man alive.
>> No. 17031 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 11:05 pm
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>>17027

Never mind m8, you could always have a chug over Janina Ramirez.

Even if she does look like a slightly chubby Andrew O'Neill. I'm not complaining.
>> No. 17032 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 11:31 pm
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>>17031

Not to (overly) objectify her, but she does amazingly captivating eyes.

Anyway, I can't masturbate to people I've garnered any kind of respect for. It feels... immoral.
>> No. 17033 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 11:32 pm
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>>17031
She's a cultural historian y'know.
>> No. 17034 Anonymous
29th October 2014
Wednesday 11:57 pm
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>>17033

That's why I want to wank over her.

Oh baby, historically contextualise the semiosis for me. Yeah, that's right, reveal the gulf between connotation and denotation.
>> No. 17035 Anonymous
30th October 2014
Thursday 12:08 am
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>>17031
Phwoooar I'd examine her works of art IYKWIM.
>> No. 17036 Anonymous
30th October 2014
Thursday 1:04 pm
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>>17027
I was about to bring her lovely return to TV to the general attention of gs. A wonderful woman.
>> No. 17040 Anonymous
31st October 2014
Friday 12:32 am
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I've been torrenting episodes of The Thick of It* recently, and I've watched series 1, and the first episode of series 2. I also have the third episode of series 2 downloaded. However, episode 2 has been stalled since this morning. What time does the train to Dorchester arrive?

*Is torrenting BBC programming actually illegal?
>> No. 17041 Anonymous
31st October 2014
Friday 12:39 am
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>>17040

Sorry to hijack your point, but I've been wondering about this for a while.

When I go to watch a programme on iPlayer, it usually asks me if I have a TV licence. When I try to watch one with a PG (16/18?) rating, it only asks me if I am over the required age and says nothing about the TV licence. Does this mean that legally I can watch PG+ programmes on iPlayer without a TV licence because obviously I'm not lying about it?
>> No. 17042 Anonymous
31st October 2014
Friday 2:02 am
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>>17041
You've not been paying attention, or iPlayer's been behaving oddly. It should only mention having a TV license when you try to watch a programme as it's broadcast (and will ask for all such live programmes regardless of age rating). You can legally watch anything on iPlayer without a Tv License as long as you don't watch it live.

Oh, and yes it's still illegal to torrent BBC shows, but after the 'four letters and then, er, nothing' ruling it's not worth losing sleep over.
>> No. 17043 Anonymous
1st November 2014
Saturday 10:34 pm
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I don't know if this happens to others, but wiping your arse nice and clean and then suddenly some more poo demands to come out and you have to wipe all over again.
>> No. 17044 Anonymous
1st November 2014
Saturday 11:07 pm
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>>17040
One thing which works quite well is (when possible), to find a torrent of the series and then set individual episodes / files to be high priority so it downloads them sequentially.
>> No. 17045 Anonymous
2nd November 2014
Sunday 8:48 am
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People who call themselves "Lewis" but spell their name "Louis", the arrogance astounds.
>> No. 17051 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 9:10 am
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So The Thick of It finally downloaded, and I've watched the first three series.

Just a heads up, get the first two out of the way before you start poking around the Wikipedia articles. Chris Langham's would have really ruined those first six episodes.
>> No. 17052 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 9:29 am
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This is self-evident, and I hate myself for mentioning it, but the humour on reddit.

I'm an addict, usually go for the porn, food, DIY and other niche subreddits, but I gravitate to /r/all and I'm surprised, for a hive-mind, how much repetition there is. How much they love the Colbert Report, that black space man, and how much they think strangers care about their animals.

sage for shame
>> No. 17053 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 10:29 am
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>>17052

Every time I accidentally look at a front page comment thread, the first thing I see is inevitably a horribly contrived pun thread. It's exactly like listening to an autistic child - you see what they're trying to do, but it doesn't quite make sense in context and goes on ten times too long.

This is the first thing I clicked on and there's a perfect example there - http://www.reddit.com/r/movies/comments/2l49or/tom_cruises_latest_mission_impossible_stunt/

They're not even puns, they're just listing his film credits. I love a good pun thread (we all do here at .gs) but jesus christ it pisses me off so much. It reeks of desperation for some reason.
>> No. 17054 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 10:42 am
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>>17053
>Every time I accidentally look at a front page comment thread, the first thing I see is inevitably a horribly contrived pun thread
That sort of thing would never happen here.
>> No. 17055 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 10:48 am
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>>17053
Any thread that isn't serious - you get a ream of the shittiest rehashed puns ever.

Serious threads include false condolences, smug self-congratulations, contradictions as to why XYZ is wrong or wont work, etc.

I really am sick of going there, but it's this addiction to know whats going on at all times is what gets me.
>> No. 17056 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 11:20 am
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>>17055

There's a few extremely useful subreddits I go to, but then since it's the internet I end up looking at /r/all too. I always regret it, yet I do it daily.
>> No. 17057 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 11:21 am
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>>17054

Our puns are fucking gold compared to theirs. It's that bad.
>> No. 17058 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 12:15 pm
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>>17057
This made me smile.
>> No. 17059 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 12:46 pm
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Well thanks for inspiring me to check back with Reddit, an action that eventually led me to checking my email. There was a very good reason I avoided doing so for 5 bloody months.
>> No. 17060 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 1:01 pm
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>>17053
There are over 2500 subreddits with more than 10,000 subscribers. If you dismiss Reddit the platform based on the inanity of the default subs you're an idiot.
>> No. 17061 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 1:59 pm
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>>17056
The specialist subreddits are slow as fuck and you always get the same farts posting, which gets dull.

Some links are gold though, and I've gotten a ton of useful stuff over the years.

It just seems so redundant in returning and clicking on the same silly shit, some boring twat reposted them which was a repost to begin with.
>> No. 17062 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 2:22 pm
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>>17061
>The specialist subreddits are slow as fuck and you always get the same farts posting
I can't stand sites like that.
>> No. 17063 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 2:41 pm
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>>17062
I see what you did there.
>> No. 17064 Anonymous
3rd November 2014
Monday 10:29 pm
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>>17062
The difference being here is that you don't know for sure it's the same old farts posting, and that does make a difference to the conversation.
>> No. 17069 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 12:08 pm
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>>17064
This modal dialogue. The fact that it's modal means I can't view the email's attachments and so I'm lacking key information needed to make a considered decision. And what a momentous decision it is.
>> No. 17070 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 2:08 pm
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>>17069
Tick the box, say no, and fuck whatever idiot keeps insisting on receipts.
>> No. 17071 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 2:26 pm
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>>17070
Oh that sounds all too permanent. I ignored it. The dialogue is still open.
>> No. 17073 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 4:08 pm
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>>17069

I refuse to allow read receipts now. People take it far too personally. Especially when they send me a fifty page PDF and ask me to give them notes, then twenty minutes later they show up at my door saying "saw you read my email, what do you think then?"
>> No. 17074 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 4:17 pm
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>>17073
I hate it when people ask me to do my job too.
>> No. 17077 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 4:24 pm
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>>17074

How long do you think it takes to analyse a 50 page document?
>> No. 17078 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 4:24 pm
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>>17077

Also it's totally not my job.
>> No. 17079 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 6:59 pm
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>>17077
Well surely you can read the abstract and conclusions in about five minutes to get the general idea of it.
>> No. 17080 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 7:01 pm
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>>17079
Thus was born the "discipline" of churnalism.
>> No. 17081 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 7:35 pm
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I've got this friend who keeps posting pictures of her breastfeeding. I have no issue with breastfeeding whatsoever, but it annoys me the way she believes she's making some form of statement when in reality nobody gives a shit outside of their insular group of friends (the ones who get wrapped up in causes that don't really matter and convince each other they're super serious) and it's just an excuse to attention seek/yet another aspect of their lives that they feel compelled to share with everyone.
>> No. 17082 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 9:23 pm
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>>17081
Learn to "acquaintances" on Facebook, lad.

Or just post her pictures on the internet or something, idk.
>> No. 17083 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 10:17 pm
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>>17081

The other day I was round at my nan's house and one of my fit cousins was breastfeeding. She left her tit hanging out while the baby was having a breather or something, and I couldn't look anywhere without seeing her milky nipple reflected in one of nan's gaudy ornaments. I had to stifle the urge to sneak off to the bog for a quick tug.

I'm not proud.
>> No. 17084 Anonymous
4th November 2014
Tuesday 10:30 pm
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>>17083

Audible, terrible, guilt-ridden mirth.
>> No. 17086 Anonymous
5th November 2014
Wednesday 1:46 am
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Spending half an hour filling out an online application form to save an HR twat 5 minutes reading my CV.
>> No. 17087 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 12:17 pm
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When the BBC give "companion" shows higher billing than the main event. I'm not going to watch the post-event analysis at all before I've actually seen the event in question, numbnuts. Can't you make your doohickey change what episode is displayed based on my viewing history or something? Woe is me.
>> No. 17088 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 3:41 pm
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People in small social situations who decide to crank up the music loud enough where you cannot hear other people and have to shout.

In a club, yeah fine but not in a living room with less than seven of us.
>> No. 17089 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 3:52 pm
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>>17088
I had one mate at 16 who did this, always on his fucking decks at top volume when we'd all be sitting around at his.

Do kids even have decks any more? Probably not.
>> No. 17090 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 3:57 pm
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>>17086

I thought they just made you jump through hoops to identify your willingness to jump through hoops.
>> No. 17091 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 5:06 pm
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>>17090
That's more like it. I don't begrudge spending time curating a good job application, just as long as that time is spent researching the firm, tweaking my CV according to what they're looking for and writing up a decent cover letter. Copying my A Level results for the umpteenth time is not a productive use of my time.
>> No. 17092 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 5:24 pm
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>>17089
Unimportant fact: MP3 controllers or Digital Vinyl are todays 'decks' m80 but in the future https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=-Afq6ELKAY0
>> No. 17093 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 6:24 pm
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>>17092
If you're going to get into that, best mixing software is http://mixxx.org/

It works with a lot of controllers and has presets for them you can download if you wish (there's a wizard to make setting up an unknown one easy as well).
It's also free, open source, and available for Linux, OSX and Windows.
>> No. 17094 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 6:45 pm
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>>17092

Ableton is the future, or it would be if most DJs weren't too stupid to use it.

https://www.youtube.com/v/3vC5TsSyNjU
>> No. 17096 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 8:47 pm
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They've fucked up the Just Eat website.

Why can't people just leave things alone.
>> No. 17097 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 8:59 pm
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>>17094
>Ableton is the future, or it would be if most DJs weren't too stupid to use it.

Get back to me when it runs on Linux. I'll consider installing it then.

Also not sure why you posted that video. That controller could have been hooked up to mixxx or ableton and still produced the same result.
>> No. 17098 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 9:36 pm
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>>17097

Mixxx doesn't support Launchpad, nor does it have the capacity for triggering large numbers of loops. It's a completely different type of product to Live and can only meaningfully be compared to Traktor, a comparison that isn't particularly favourable. The timestretching and tempo extraction algorithms are poor, as is the timecode tracking implementation. It lacks four-deck support and has very rudimentary sample triggering facilities. Looping, cueing, waveform display, effects and routing are all much more basic than in Traktor. There are hundreds of little details that just aren't right in Mixxx and betray the lack of development resources. I'd call it competent, but no better than that. It's about where Traktor was two or three years ago. It's perfectly usable if you're a GNU/Linux devotee or you just can't afford a Traktor license, but it's no match for it and certainly not superior.
>> No. 17099 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 9:59 pm
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>>17096

It's not changed for me lad. They're probably doing a trial run of a new version.

Make sure you write a letter to your MP to complain and everything will be back to normal before you can say 'vegetable pakora'.
>> No. 17100 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 10:26 pm
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>>17098
>Mixxx doesn't support Launchpad
Not true.
http://www.mixxx.org/forums/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=3739

Which goes for pretty much the rest of your comment as well. I can't be fucked finding links for each point though. Let's agree to disagree.
>> No. 17101 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 10:31 pm
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>>17099
You're going to love when they roll it out. The UI is now stupid and fucked.

On top of that, the page telling you when the food will be delivered, what time and even whether the restaurant has seen it yet has gone. Now you have to log into your email to see whether they accepted it. Also, it no longer gives a time for it to show up, just says "As Soon As Possible".

Fuck this gay earth.
>> No. 17102 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 10:34 pm
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>>17100

You can manually map it to do something it wasn't designed to, and that doesn't provide its intended functionality. That doesn't sound like 'support' to me.
>> No. 17103 Anonymous
6th November 2014
Thursday 10:41 pm
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>>17102
Fuck off. Not in this thread.
>> No. 17104 Anonymous
7th November 2014
Friday 4:49 am
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I noticed recently that most men in porn have the expression of a maths pupil just handed back a homework sheet they'd thought they aced, only to find they actually got an E.

It's very off putting.
>> No. 17105 Anonymous
7th November 2014
Friday 6:43 am
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>>17104

Isn't that the same face you make when you sniff your armpit and it smells like sour milk and old man even though you only showered six hours ago?

Or is it the face you make when you found out that your favourite author just died before he could complete a book series you were into?
>> No. 17106 Anonymous
7th November 2014
Friday 9:58 am
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>>17105

I've always seen it as the face you make when you read an unexpected bank charge but realise it's entirely your own fault.
>> No. 17108 Anonymous
7th November 2014
Friday 2:34 pm
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>>17106

The face that you make when you realise somebody near by has done a rotten fart and you don't want to be the first person to react in case you get accused of having smelt it and thus dealt it accordingly.
>> No. 17120 Anonymous
8th November 2014
Saturday 7:17 pm
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>>14492
Paying for electricity.

How Direct Debit normally works for everything else:
- Bill produced, account updated.
- Outstanding balance taken from your bank account on agreed date.

How Direct Debit works for electricity:
- Fixed amount taken from your bank account with no relation to the amount you owe them, even if your account with them is in credit.
- Can't deliberately set this amount to be below your usage to top up as appropriate.
- Can't arrange for actual correct amount to be taken out each month.
- 30% price hike if you opt out of this clusterfuck.

Seriously, what the fuck is this shit?
>> No. 17122 Anonymous
8th November 2014
Saturday 7:45 pm
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>>17120
Isn't this against the direct debit agreement?
>> No. 17123 Anonymous
10th November 2014
Monday 2:02 pm
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>>14492
Waiting in for a fucking engineer to fix my internet.

Bloody thing has been up and down the past 4 weeks, barely able to stay up for 5 minutes before crashing.

Of course, now they're sending an engineer out, it's behaving fine...just like last time they sent one out.
Bollocks to BT
>> No. 17124 Anonymous
10th November 2014
Monday 6:08 pm
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>>17123

Do you have a thinkbroadband.com Broadband Quality Monitor? You can document the outages.
>> No. 17125 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 8:33 am
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>>17120
I've never really thought about it before but yeah it is really fucking odd isn't it?
>> No. 17126 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 11:52 am
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>>17120
>Can't arrange for actual correct amount to be taken out each month.
You can send them up to date meter readings, you know?
>> No. 17127 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 3:14 pm
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>>17126
What's that got to do with anything?
>> No. 17128 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 3:47 pm
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Don't know whether to do it's own thread on 101 or emo, but I'll shoe-horn it here.

British lasses on OkCupid, specifically from the midlands and oop-norf. Why don't they watch what they eat?

I'm saddened to be matched up with birds that are easily twice my weight, and look like the Michelin man's daughter...
Fuck sake girls, put down the pasty and just go for a run or something, you fall at the first hurdle in online dating, never mind any other hurdle you may try to jump.
>> No. 17129 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 3:59 pm
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>>17128

The problem is OKcupid itself. There's plenty of men on there that will smother those women with attention, either because they're hedging their bets, or they're just desperate. No matter what a woman looks like, her profile will get hundreds of messages, which makes her think she's already a svelte goddess.
>> No. 17130 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 5:14 pm
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>>17129
Don't think so entirely. Although there are a lot of desperate men clamouring for attention - I get a lot of messages from these fat lasses. And they don't have much of a personality either - usually it's "hiya xxx :)" or some malformed string of letters. I wouldn't mind replying to an actual message.
>> No. 17131 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 5:22 pm
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>>17128

A quarter of British women are obese, more than half are overweight.

Conventionally desirable women get chirpsed all the time in real life, so they don't really need to bother with online dating. OkC is full of fat girls and weirdos, PoF is full of fat single mums, Match is full of fat divorcees.

Personally I prefer fat girls, so I'm like a dog with two dicks.

That brings me to a minor gripe of my own. I'm naturally very thin, and I wish that strangers would a) stop telling me that I need to put on weight and b) stop gawping when I'm with a much bigger woman. I don't have a wasting disease, I don't need a good steak, I'm not a fetishist or a feeder, now piss off.
>> No. 17132 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 5:27 pm
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>>17131
Why do you like fat lasses if you don't mind me asking?
>> No. 17133 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 8:44 pm
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>>17132
I bet they remind him of his mum or that he likes being henpecked.
>> No. 17136 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 10:09 pm
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>>17133
They let him piss in their arses.
>> No. 17138 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 11:09 pm
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>>17131
>A quarter of British women are obese, more than half are overweight.

Forget about foreigners, these are the real people ruining ARE BRITAIN.

Having said that I go to the a top UK uni and I know precisely zero fat people of either gender. OK maybe like one or two could be considered slightly overweight but definitely not obese. I don't see any in halls, lectures or labs... it's quite strange to go to the towney side of town (or home) and be reminded that they exist.

I'm really trying to figure out why this is the case. I mean unless there is a massive anti-fat conspiracy taking place within uni admissions, the only possible conclusion that can be drawn is that fat people are on average less intelligent/more lazy than thin people. I don't want to draw this conclusion but it's the only one that fits the data.
>> No. 17139 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 11:13 pm
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>>17138

Are they mostly under 30? Some people seem to balloon after that.
>> No. 17140 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 11:13 pm
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>>17132

It's just a subjective aesthetic thing. I think it's a bit like asking "Why are you attracted to women rather than men?" or vice-versa. You can give a long list of the attributes you find sexually attractive, but the logic is ultimately circular and the answer always boils down to "I dunno, that's just the way I'm wired". I don't find thinner women unattractive per se, nor do I find all fat women attractive, it's just a preference. I think we've all got an ideal size range in mind, mine is just shifted six or seven stone higher than that of most white men.

If you were to push me, I'd say that I like wide thighs and broad buttocks, I like big squishy bits to wobble and squeeze. I like the feeling of being enveloped, of sinking into someone else's body, the weight and pressure of an embrace. I like how dynamic fat is, I like how it jiggles and ripples and yields. Fat is sensual.

>>17133

My mum was always a skinny little thing like me. Maybe it's my body clock ticking and I'm looking for a suitably broad-hipped woman to bear my progeny, maybe the psychological trauma of financial insecurity made me seek out a buxom woman to mother me, maybe I just really like big arses.
>> No. 17141 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 11:20 pm
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>>17139
Yeah I was thinking that age would be a factor. Even so, in comparison to my old school and sixth form the proportion of fat people is a lot smaller. Smokers too, aside from some 'drunk smokers' or occasional stoners I know hardly anyone here who regularly smokes tobacco.
>> No. 17142 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 11:36 pm
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Leaving tissues in clothing when it is washed, and thus rendering the entire wash completely useless; as all your now clean clothes are covered in shitloads of tiny flecks of tissue.

Inevitably even if you check the pockets of all your jeans you forget there's a tissue in a jumper or something. Fucks sake.
>> No. 17143 Anonymous
11th November 2014
Tuesday 11:39 pm
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>>17140
Fair enough. I ask cos I was with a "big girl" once, just a once off shag really, but what put me off was the smells - arse, gash, rolls. It's just nauseating. I'm sure she showers regularly, it's just that fatties have a harder time keeping the sweat down, and getting in those nooks.

>>17138
I have also noticed this too, intelligence sort of plays a factor. Just being knowledgeable about what you stuff in your gob, and how much it takes to burn it off - should play an important roll in not being a whale. I found myself in Gregs the other day, every big lass there was stuffing her food hole with a bacon butty and a packet of crisps, it was rather sickening. My kraut friends remarked how it's weird that almost everyone eats crisps for lunch, followed by lashings of "diet" pepsi or something or other. This cunry is broken.
>> No. 17144 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 12:03 am
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>>17143

>intelligence sort of plays a factor

It's more complicated than that, I think. Everyone knows that eating too much will make you fat, most people know which foods are fattening and what constitutes a sensible diet. The problem isn't in knowing what you should and shouldn't eat, it's in having the emotional resources and the social support to manage your eating. Obesity and overweight is as much about the social and cultural role of food and the emotional relationship people have with it.

No reasonable person would call Stephen Fry unintelligent, but he has struggled with food and other addictions throughout his life. I think that the relative paucity of overweight people at >>17138's university has less to do with intelligence and more to do with social class. The kind of privilege that gets you into an elite university (a family with the time and money to invest in your upbringing) is also pivotal in developing healthy eating habits as a child. The kind of upwardly mobile parents that send Rupert and Jemima to violin lessons and Kumon maths will also make sure to feed them only the finest nutritionally balanced organic meals.

>My kraut friends

Germany's rate of obesity and overweight is only a couple of percent lower than ours. Britain does have the highest rates in Europe, but only by a small margin. The obesity and overweight rates across European countries fall within a fairly narrow band, suggesting that the main causes of overeating are cross-cultural.

http://epp.eurostat.ec.europa.eu/statistics_explained/index.php/Overweight_and_obesity_-_BMI_statistics
>> No. 17157 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 5:23 pm
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>>17144

Bollocks, it's down to three things: Laziness, commercialism, and more laziness.

Fat cunts know they should lay off the Doritos when they've just got to the bottom of their second 150g bag of the evening, and they know washing them down with the cheapest red from Sainsbury's won't make them feel any better either, but they just can't stop themselves. The emotional and culture issues you mention really boil down to nothing more than these people not having the willpower to break that habit, and the fact that said habit is all they have ever known.

Gemma from HR doesn't actually know that there are things to do in life beyond watching Eastenders with her ritual comfort food and alcoholic drink, and even if she does, she isn't interested because most of them involve getting her fat arse off the sofa for once. So that's all she does, and it's all she will do, until she one day emerges from her cocoon as the fat middle aged slag stumbling towards you in a nightclub yelling "LERRUS FEEL YER BUM, SEXXXYYYY". No doubt there are powerful interests at work keeping her in her miserable lifestyle, but she's not a robot.

I think for something as fundamental as eating, that's where we have to draw a line and buck liberal/modernist sociological trend that absolves people of responsibility for their actions. Fat cunts may be a victim of circumstance, but they have absolutely no excuses not to change their habits. Nobody takes pity on a smoker who can't quit, so I have zero empathy for a lard-arse who can't put down the cheeseburgers.

TL;DR- Being fat is the same as being a drug addict only less sympathetic. If you want to be fat then power to you, but until I'm allowed to smoke crack in the park, don't come crying to me about social stigma.
>> No. 17158 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 5:28 pm
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>>17144
>No reasonable person would call Stephen Fry unintelligent

Me neither but I despise his psuedo-intellectualism.
>> No. 17159 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 5:38 pm
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>>17157
>TL;DR

Lad.
>> No. 17160 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 7:32 pm
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>>17157
Mirth is audible.

Thanks for the chuckle, but on a serious note, if you google "Gemma from HR" you get a ream of hits. Quite funny I thought.
>> No. 17161 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 9:28 pm
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I don't understand who or what a Dapper Laugh is and why people are talking about him a lot.
>> No. 17162 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 9:43 pm
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>>17160

Oh Jesus, you're right. And the images loom exactly as you'd expect.
>> No. 17163 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 9:50 pm
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>>17161

>Daniel O'Reilly, better known by his stage name Dapper Laughs, is a social media celebrity and comedian from Clapham Common. His comedy has been described as promoting lad culture.

Pure fucking cancer. Google yields that he retired his "character", he should retire from living as well.
>> No. 17164 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 10:01 pm
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>>17163
My opinion is always split by people like this. In one sense I find his humour boring and predictable, but on the other the reaction it has recently elicited from vehemently anti lad-culture parts of the media has provided more than enough chuckles.
>> No. 17165 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 10:10 pm
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>>17164
It's true, but this entertainer to me at least, is just another boil on the ass of modern culture. Luckily I'm fairly insular to this type of stuff, so it only comes obvious to me when one of you mention it.
>> No. 17166 Anonymous
12th November 2014
Wednesday 10:14 pm
17166 spacer
>>17157
Have you ever had an addiction?

I agree with you for the most part (I'd change tone rather than content, if I was writing that post), but I'm curious if you know what it's like.
>> No. 17167 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 2:33 am
17167 spacer
>>17166

I have, but to be honest (and I don't mean to dismiss your point) I feel that the nature and mechanics of addiction are fairly irrelevant to the matter.

It's like that article a while back playing the sympathetic violins for people "addicted" to micro-transactions on videogames. At some point, I think you do have to stop philosophising and tell these people to get a grip- Stuff like cocaine or heroin is a different matter to a simple compulsion that someone has been too weak of will to shake off.
>> No. 17168 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 4:35 am
17168 spacer
>>17167
>weak of will

Agreed in spades m8. At some point, as a society we lost all sense of personal responsibility - everything is someone else's fault. Look in the mirror lads, that's the person who is responsible for all the successes and failures in your life. Most people would much rather blame someone else.

Blame is the root of all evil.
>> No. 17169 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 6:46 am
17169 spacer
>>17168
That's an incredibly black and white way to see things. I'd possibly agree that in some cases people do need to take personal responsibility for their circumstances, but I don't think it's always the case. Can you not envisage circumstances/successes/failures that are entirely out of your control?

No amount of will is going to stop a heart attack or reverse major clinical depression. It just seems like an incredibly blinkered way to view the world, it also makes it much easier to pass judgement on others whilst making yourself feel better whilst disregarding larger cultural, sociological and biological reasons for why people behave in certain ways.

You are of course entitled to your opinion and I would agree there are some circumstances where I too just think "oh for fucks sake just sort your fucking life out you useless tosser!". I do try to realise that this sort of thinking is often times down to my own inherent biases though and isn't indicative of any greater truth about the world.

Sage for early morning rambling.
>> No. 17170 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 9:07 am
17170 spacer
>>17167
>Stuff like cocaine or heroin is a different matter to a simple compulsion that someone has been too weak of will to shake off.
Looks pretty clear that you have no idea how addiction actually works.
>> No. 17171 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 9:08 am
17171 spacer
>>17169

Inclined to agree. Also what the earlier poster said about 'powerful interests' is spot on. I'd consider myself a strong-willed person, but at various points of my life I've given in to drink, smoking, and found myself trapped as an unhappy end user in various shitty systems. Everyone surely knows that feeling, and the only substantive difference between me and Gemma from HR is that we're entrenched to different degrees and in different ways. Once you get into the habit of believing you've found your place, or worse, have enough creature comforts just to 'get by', the incentive to think about different ways of living diminishes.
>> No. 17174 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 11:18 am
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>>17170
Word. I remember speaking with some people in an addiction recovery center, they told me that the most difficult addictions to treat are the purely mental ones (vidya, compulsive shopping, gambling and the like)
>> No. 17175 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 11:30 am
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I don't know if anyone else has noticed the Daily Mail's semi-regular Samantha Lewthwaite updates (she was married to a 7/7 bomber or something). Anyway, they just love making up absolutely anything about her. I think she's been killed roughly half a dozen times, and birthed around 18 children to 7 different men in the last 3 years. This week she's mostly been getting killed in the Ukraine by a pro-Russian sniper.

Obviously it's about factual as a Unicorn in a flying saucer, but on every article the [thousands of] comments are filled with people just totally buying into it. It's really weird how naive these people are, even for Mail readers.
>> No. 17177 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 12:00 pm
17177 spacer
>>17167
>stuff like cocaine or heroin

Lad, those two are definitely not in the same league as each other if we're talking about addictiveness.

My personal view is that someone who recognises an addiction/vice deserves more sympathy than someone who remains ignorant. Everyone has vices, the best you can do is to make sure they are relatively harmless.
>> No. 17178 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 12:16 pm
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People that post links to adverts in their facebook feed. WE ALL HAVE TELEVISONS. I don't. I haven't even passed my tv licence yet. HAHA LOOK AT THE CUTE LITTLE FUCKING PENGUIN.

It comes second only to passive aggressive jibes and vaguebooking with regards to how much vitriolic bile it summons from me.
>> No. 17179 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 12:25 pm
17179 spacer
>>17178
>vaguebooking

I didn't even know this had a term. Might have to relay it to my friends and family that get stressed about passive aggressive comments that may be directed at them.
>> No. 17182 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 1:32 pm
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>>17174

Gosh yeah, I can see they would be difficult to treat, considering they are not addictions.

Okay, okay, I'm being purposely provocative here. I know it is possible for people to get hooked on things due to circumstances in life and conditions such as depression etc- But I maintain the gist.

Anybody who is addicted to something pathetic with absolutely no chemically addictive properties, is an absolute cretin, and that this is the primary source of their troubles in life.

>>17170

Like I said, it's irrelevant. Addiction can work however it wants, I'm still not going to believe in the cult of victimhood your lot have built around it.
>> No. 17183 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 1:32 pm
17183 spacer
>>17182
But what about those that are addicted to something with chemically addictive properties? Are they not an even larger cretin for using that something even though it is a known chemically addictive thing?
>> No. 17184 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 1:51 pm
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>>17183

I know it's not quite what you're getting at, but I'm reading this debate while supping on a cup of coffee.
>> No. 17186 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 2:14 pm
17186 spacer
>>17183

They deserve a slap for taking something that they really ought to have known better about, yes. But there's at least a bit more weight behind it when they claim to be unable to stop.
>> No. 17187 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 5:47 pm
17187 spacer
>>17178>>17179

One of the reasons I left Friendface was because I was doing the opposite of "vagueblogging" and writing lengthy parables on any old nonsense. Then I found .gs.

Also I had no friends.
>> No. 17188 Anonymous
13th November 2014
Thursday 7:13 pm
17188 spacer
>>17182
I guess the otherlad is right. You really do have no fucking idea about addiction. There is sound evidence on addiction as relates to games, porn and high-calorie food.
>> No. 17189 Anonymous
14th November 2014
Friday 11:23 pm
17189 spacer
I have had this song stuck in my head for days. It feels like I am being held hostage by Russ Abbott and I fear I am beginning to develop Stockholm Syndrome. Please send help, before suicide becomes my only escape.

https://www.youtube.com/v/RFPLk5mJ1D4
>> No. 17190 Anonymous
14th November 2014
Friday 11:40 pm
17190 spacer
>>17182

Mental addiction is still an addiction to the release of dopamine.
>> No. 17191 Anonymous
15th November 2014
Saturday 2:39 am
17191 spacer
>>17189
Start a /beat/ thread for tunes that you can't get out of your head. Somehow I ended up with Mertesacker Emptiness (sic) running through my head this morning, with absolutely no idea of how it got started.
>> No. 17192 Anonymous
15th November 2014
Saturday 5:49 pm
17192 spacer
The council give us food caddies, and bags to put them in. The bags are too small for the caddies and about half of the bags I've used so far have split.
>> No. 17193 Anonymous
15th November 2014
Saturday 6:04 pm
17193 spacer
Fucking Christmas shoppers.

In every high street and retard park every Saturday for the next 5 weeks hordes of morons will become arrogant, moody, selfish and violent in their quest for Lynx gift sets and slippers that look like reindeer.

Fuck the lot of them with a barbed wire pointy stick.
>> No. 17194 Anonymous
15th November 2014
Saturday 6:24 pm
17194 spacer
>>17193
Parking fuckery.

Years ago, we had voucher parking - two vouchers at a time, valid for anything between thirty minutes and five hours depending on which part of town toy were in. Naturally you had to buy the vouchers in books of ten, though a few enterprising newsagents would sell you singles. That got replaced with pay-and-display, and naturally expanded to other parts. Recently the council thought it would be nice to dedicate the street next to County Hall as long stay but the next two streets over (near a station) as short stay. Now they've decided that they want a separate evening rate. Your daytime paid parking will end at 6pm, and for the next three good you'll need to pay a surcharge. It's almost as if they don't want people spending money in town.

That is at least better than the next city over, where you get free parking until 5pm on a Sunday, though have to pay between then and 9pm.
>> No. 17200 Anonymous
17th November 2014
Monday 11:14 pm
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My girlfriend says I'm weird because I eat the bits separately to the yoghurt when I have a muller corner.

I say she's a s fucking yoghurt fascist.
>> No. 17201 Anonymous
17th November 2014
Monday 11:17 pm
17201 spacer
>>17200
I say you're fucking veird, m8.
>> No. 17202 Anonymous
17th November 2014
Monday 11:24 pm
17202 spacer
>>17201
Agreed. This is a very strange habit, >>17200.
>> No. 17203 Anonymous
17th November 2014
Monday 11:25 pm
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>>17200

I've been known to stomp out of the room in a strop after shouting "Sort your fucking inventory, woman! What is wrong with you?" because I was told to take a "chill pill" for berating her for hoarding shite in RPGs.

Proper inventory management is no trifling matter.
>> No. 17204 Anonymous
17th November 2014
Monday 11:28 pm
17204 spacer
>>17201>>17202

It's no weirder than eating the liquorice out a Sherbet Fountain before tackling the sherbet, imho.
>> No. 17205 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 12:52 am
17205 spacer
>>17204
I'd day it's the difference between pokey bum wanks and felching; both are unusual, but one is definitely a little weirder than the other.
>> No. 17206 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 1:14 am
17206 spacer
Wheb the inside of your ear is itchy, but you can't scratch it because you can't get at it because it's inside a tiny canal in your head and trying to jab your little finger ineffectually at the itch just gets your nail covered in sticky wax.

Aaaaaaaaaaa
>> No. 17207 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 6:34 am
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>>17206

Japanese ear picks, silly. They're five for a pound on eBay.
>> No. 17208 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 6:57 am
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>>17207
Fuck's sake, do people really not know how to use a paper clip angmore?
>> No. 17209 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 7:42 am
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>>17208

Paperclips don't have that little scrapey bit. Paperclips just made it tickle more until I'd get frustrated and really go for it with my fingernail, causing semi-regular ear infections and perpetuating the itch-scratch cycle.
>> No. 17210 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 7:47 am
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People who don't look at the toilet roll after wiping their arse. How else will you know you've definitely got all of the poo off?
>> No. 17211 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 8:00 am
17211 spacer
>>17210

How do you know they don't? Do they discuss the fact with you?
>> No. 17212 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 10:16 am
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>>17211
I think you're the outlier here lad.
>> No. 17213 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 10:59 am
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>>17212
>>17211-lad's question seems a very reasonable. I for one have never asked, or been asked about my wiping habits. Have you been asking people about this? If so, what inspired you to ask such questions? Have you been rimming some particularly dirty arses?
>> No. 17214 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 2:28 pm
17214 spacer
>>17211
It somehow came up in conversation. Apparently I'm the odd one for checking the toilet roll after each wipe.
>> No. 17215 Anonymous
18th November 2014
Tuesday 3:08 pm
17215 spacer
>>17214
I always check. It also clues me in to what kind of job I'm in for - whether it's one that came out smoothly and needs practically no wiping at all; or one that needs a bit of scrubbing but we'll be fine; or a Code Red, showerhead-to-the-anus situation. You just can't strategise without checking.
>> No. 17222 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 12:15 pm
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>>17215

Bidets should really be standard.
>> No. 17223 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 12:38 pm
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Two of my colleagues have extremely bizarre shitting habits, one has to completely strip off naked before proceeding and the other habitually showers after each and every shit. His showers last at least 30 minutes, about as long as it takes for him to squeeze one out.
That's another thing, when someone who isn't ill or hungover spends more than 5 minutes taking a shit really grinds my gears.
>> No. 17225 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 1:02 pm
17225 spacer
>>17223
I'm willing to wager that neither of those people do those bizarre things all the time, but that they claim they do to appear like they're off their nut OCD as per the vogue in the past few.
>> No. 17226 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 1:09 pm
17226 spacer
>>17225
These people do exist. I've known people who used to take their washing up home so their mum could do it, or do it only with bleach.
>> No. 17227 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 1:12 pm
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>>17226
That's not really the same, though, is it? I was mainly trying to have a whinge about people who are well OCD.
>> No. 17228 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 1:18 pm
17228 spacer
>>17227

This actually led to an awkward situation for me a while ago where I thought someone was exaggerating in this way until they started talking about needing to lock, unlock, and relock their doors a certain number of times before leaving the house.
>> No. 17229 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 1:26 pm
17229 spacer
>>17228
That's it, though, they were "talking about it". My mate used to claim she went in every room in the house before she went to bed and said goodnight to the room otherwise she wouldn't get a wink of sleep.

I've had a teary about this on here plenty of times. I remember a lad on /emo/ spilling his guts about how OCD has ruined his life to no end and he too can't stand people who claim to have it over daft little things like wanting the volume on their telly to be an even number. We met up one time and burnt an effigy of Jon Richardson together.
>> No. 17230 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 5:33 pm
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>>17229
I bet you do that all the time.
>> No. 17231 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 5:39 pm
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>>17226
I did my laundry and forgot I put my Halloween costume in my laundry bag

That was a fun day at the uni halls laundry room when I pulled that out.
>> No. 17232 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 5:39 pm
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>>17229>>17230

>We met up one time and burnt an effigy of Jon Richardson together.

It's funny you should say that, I have to do that or else I can't achieve orgasm.
>> No. 17233 Anonymous
19th November 2014
Wednesday 7:32 pm
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Most days I just sort of have the news on in the background while I post here, play a computer game or fall asleep. But tonight I've been paying attention and I think it's given me a brain tumour.
>> No. 17236 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 1:08 am
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>>17233

It's bad isn't it, those nights where you don't have anything to do but post here.

I've actually been full circle of becoming an alcoholic through sheer bloody routine of late shifts and .gs, and then recovering thanks to the resting actors thread.

I struggle because the news makes me angry/depressed, I've literally read Wikipedia, and Dan Carlin only releases podcasts every lunar e-fucking-clipse. What else is there to do at this time of night?
>> No. 17237 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 1:25 am
17237 spacer
>>17236
One the reasons I became borderline nocturnal until fairly recently was due to the amount of internet activity that goes on at night.

Regarding news I was sad enough to stay awake all night when I heard bin Laden was killed just so I could break the news first. I was fairly pissed off previously over not breaking the news of Michael Jackson first.
>> No. 17239 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 6:48 am
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>>17236
>I struggle because the news makes me angry/depressed

Snap. I'll usually visit 2/3 news sites per day, but it's largely just depressing. I can fully understand why some people don't keep abreast of current affairs if it's only going to make them feel down.
>> No. 17240 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 12:48 pm
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>>17239

I'm trying to avoid watching the news now. It's just propaganda. Not being /boo/ about it, but I don't like being told what to be afraid of. Of all the events that occur, I'd rather learn of them as I choose to learn of them, and then make my own mind up.
>> No. 17241 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 1:05 pm
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>>17236
> What else is there to do at this time of night?
I often browse Youtube for any big event and then add the words hoax or conspiracy. Pure gold.
>> No. 17242 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 1:18 pm
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>>17241

You must have a stronger constitution than I.That kind of thing would make my head break.
>> No. 17243 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 1:30 pm
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>>17242
Just yesterday I came across videos regarding the use of space-based energy beams to destroy the twin towers.
>> No. 17244 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 2:13 pm
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>>17236

Read a book, watch a film, whatever.

I've gone a bit /boo/ in my attitude towards the news. It doesn't seem any more accurate or informative than a buzzfeed article.
>> No. 17245 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 2:13 pm
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>>17243
It sounds like you're really falling behind in your following of the news.
>> No. 17247 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 5:04 pm
17247 spacer
>>17244
>Read a book, watch a film, whatever.

This. I usually catch up with tv shows I've fallen behind on, like Homeland, or dip into a book. I've had to cut back on the news though, since I've been reading it since I was around 12/13 and lately noticed how much it's getting me down. I've had to limit myself to science/tech news, medical advances and all that good stuff, as that's pretty much all positive.

Sometimes I'll spend the time learning about a random historical event though, just because.
>> No. 17248 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 5:16 pm
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>>17245
Well maybe I've been using the wrong sources. Obviously the evil mainstream media has hidden the truth about space-based energy beams from me.
>> No. 17249 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 7:37 pm
17249 spacer
https://www.youtube.com/v/ZYNwAdmx1Vk
>> No. 17250 Anonymous
20th November 2014
Thursday 11:04 pm
17250 spacer
You are all weaklings. Why haven't you developed emotional detachment, commitment and other minor psychological issues? You can read all the news you want and not give a shit.
>> No. 17271 Anonymous
26th November 2014
Wednesday 8:34 am
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I've just seen someone post on Facebook about not 'riot shaming' the spear chuckers in America.
>> No. 17272 Anonymous
26th November 2014
Wednesday 4:49 pm
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>>17271
Don't spear-shame them.
>> No. 17273 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 2:11 am
17273 spacer
How could I have been naive enough to assume that, in the year 2014, I would be able to buy, download, install and play a new game without at least 3-4 hours of fucking around and a cavalcade of seemingly unrelated issues and fucking ball ache.

Fuck you Steam, GFWL, Rockstar and whatever cunt wrote the dodgy DLLs I downloaded to try get my generic USB gamepad working. Fuck you all and I hope your relatives get bowel cancer.
>> No. 17274 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 3:12 am
17274 spacer
>>17273
Not to start a tired consoles vs. PC debate but I do miss the days when playing on a console meant instant access to the game at the cost of graphical performance. I'm fine with PC games taking that bit longer what with fine tuning for the best performance and a little bit of ball ache.

I wanted to play a game on a friend's PS3 and having to download 1GB of patches and install 5 or so GB was just annoying. Didn't even want to play the game by that point, it was at the point where I couldn't skip the developer logos that I lost the will to play.
>> No. 17275 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 9:10 am
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>>17271
The whole case makes me pretty ambivalent, but it's clear the officer was correct to act that way. Urban bongos will find any excuse to riot and get their flat screen TVs and bags of rice.
>> No. 17276 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 9:35 am
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>>17275
Watch those edges lad.
>> No. 17277 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 12:52 pm
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>>17275
Yeah m8, shooting unarmed people is 'correct'

you fucking idiot
>> No. 17278 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 12:57 pm
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>>17277
Doesn't the evidence suggest that the black fella attacked him, tried to steal his gun and then charged at him with his hand down his undercrackers like he was gonna whip out a gun?
>> No. 17279 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 1:07 pm
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>>17278
Don't even bother trying to reason with them. I tried this on facebook (yes, I know, stupid) and was subjected to accusations of racism, being right wing, and eventually just all out name calling.
>> No. 17280 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 1:13 pm
17280 spacer
If you want some proper rage go read the Graun comments on the various HORRIBLE RACIST INJUSTICE STRIKES AGAIN articles.

Frankly I can agree with points from both sides. If you are American, and black, you shouldn't act in such a retarded manner towards a pig because you know you will end up dead. Yes it's rather abhorrent that that's the way things are, but the residents of Ferguson are chimping out in a not dissimilar manner to the people from London a few years ago- Most of them are indeed just after their flatscreen, not social justice.

Frankly it's easier to write of the whole situation as evidence of what a backwards shithole America really is under the surface, and say no more on the matter.
>> No. 17281 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 1:19 pm
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>>17274

To be fair it was my own fault as it turns out- The game worked at first, but I wasn't content to use mouse and keyboard, I had to go and start fucking around to get my controller working. I spent hours faffing around and then it turned out to have been a ssingle, fairly simple mistake I made at stage one of the whole operation.

You know when you get increasingly angry for so long that when you finally figure it out, you just groan and collapse into a fit of giggles? Yup.

... Still it's inexcusable that GFWL exists and tries to insist that the Xbox 360 controller is the ONLY controller ever made. Fuck off.
>> No. 17282 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 1:21 pm
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>>17280
All I've really read on the matter is the evidence, but it seems that most people had their minds made up way in advance and things like facts aren't going to change that.

I just assumed this was about Seppos being trigger happy rather than race, but there was that hoo-hah about that Mexican fella shooting that black lad, who they tried to make out as white so they could bleat on about race so you never know
>> No. 17283 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 1:22 pm
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>>17280
>Most of them are indeed just after their flatscreen, not social justice.
It's what he would have wanted.
>> No. 17284 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 2:10 pm
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>>17278
Isn't it just the police officer saying he ran at him like that? Evidence wise there's marks of a struggle at some point, but I thought it was essentially just his word that he was enraged/charing at him before he shot him.

As for everyone being up in arms about it, there are far clearer cases of police abuse and brutality in America that never got attention like this.
>> No. 17285 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 2:15 pm
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>>17284
The Grand Jury heard evidence from a lot of witnesses. It seems all the ones who claimed Brown had his hands up and wasn't charging ended up contradicting themselves, and also their testimony didn't fit in with the forensic evidence.
>> No. 17286 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 2:21 pm
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>>17284
>Isn't it just the police officer saying he ran at him like that?

IIRC, the blood splatter showed that he'd ran so far towards him while he was being shot at and some of the witnesses backed this up. Like the other lad has said, a lot of the witnesses have had their testimonies turn out to be bullshit once they've been scrutinised.
>> No. 17287 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 4:30 pm
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>>17286
Ah but the forensic evidence was likely collected and analysed by whitey.
>> No. 17288 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 4:37 pm
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>>17284

The whole argument is just sleight-of-hand. It's not OK to shoot an unarmed man just because he's running at you. American policing is adversarial and trigger-happy; Racial discrimination means that black people are disproportionately affected, but their basic standards of policing fall well below what would be acceptable in any other developed nation.
>> No. 17289 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 5:19 pm
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>>17288
Maybe it's because they don't let anyone with a high IQ into the force. There's a very "us vs them" mentality in policing there, like they place loyalty to the force above duty to citizens. Also, aren't they quite fond of tasers over there? I thought police officers usually have one on them.
>> No. 17290 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 5:48 pm
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>>17289
>Maybe it's because they don't let anyone with a high IQ into the force.
Or maybe it isn't. And how true even is your premise? I'm aware of Jordan v. New London, but what of the picture nationally?

>>17288
>It's not OK to shoot an unarmed man just because he's running at you.
This isn't the contention of the people who defend Wilson. Brown had already been hit before the charging took place, so by definition he wasn't killed "just because" of that.

>A struggle took place between Brown and Wilson through the window of the police SUV, a Chevrolet Tahoe. Wilson's gun was fired twice during the struggle, with one bullet hitting Brown's arm while it was inside the vehicle

An entirely different incident, obviously:

https://www.youtube.com/v/-XFYTtgZAlE
>> No. 17291 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 6:35 pm
17291 spacer
>>17290
This. If you live in a trigger-happy backwater like America it's not the best of ideas to attack a police officer, threaten him, try and take his gun or to run at him while making it look like you're drawing a weapon.

One less thug on the street, diddums.
>> No. 17292 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 8:09 pm
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>>17288
>It's not OK to shoot an unarmed man just because he's running at you.
On the contrary, it's Darwinism in action. The intelligent person generally decides not to run at a cop who's pointing a gun at them and says "stop or I'll shoot" in order to not get fucking shot.
>> No. 17293 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 8:20 pm
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>>17292
I heard that he shouted 'get down!' but he misunderstood and started boogie dancing towards him, such as black men are prone to do.
>> No. 17294 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 9:28 pm
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Could you lot not have made a shitty thread in /pol/ about all this? I could have just hidden it then. Thanks for fucking up an amusing /101/ thread though.
>> No. 17295 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 9:41 pm
17295 spacer
>>17294
Let's get back on track.

I hate when threads get derailed.
>> No. 17296 Anonymous
27th November 2014
Thursday 9:50 pm
17296 spacer
>>17295
If only Michael Brown had that option!

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